Okay, so I updated a little early, but I just had to.

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Disclaimer: Vampire Academy belongs to Richelle Mead!

It had been three weeks since the night I kissed Christian after he poured his heart out to me. I hadn't seen him since then and I wasn't sure if that hurt me or not. I mean I had finally opened myself up to my feelings and then nothing. Not a phone call, a text, or even an email. It was Saturday and the sun was just starting to set. I knew I wouldn't be able to get anymore sleep so I decided to go to the gym. Maybe a good fight could help me clear my mind.

I headed to the gym hoping to catch another guardian there. I walked in to find one of the newer guardians attacking the punching bag. He was seriously upset about something and looked like he could use a fight too.

"Hey, how about a spar?" I asked loud enough for him to hear me.

He stopped hitting the bag and turned around. He was good looking, standing at about six-three with short blonde hair and striking gray eyes. I think his name is Taylor Michaels but I wasn't positive. "Sure, you aren't afraid you will get hurt?"

I couldn't help but laugh at that. "Do you not know who you are talking to?"

"Rosemarie Hathaway. Made your first Strigoi kills your senior year at the academy and fought in the battle of St. Vladimir's. Helped lead a rescue mission for the Dhampirs and Moroi that were taken. Graduated top of your class, even after you ran away for two years and dropped out and went on a revenge spree in Russia. You were assigned to Princess Dragomir and have been working at the Court for the past five years."

"Okay, that's just a little creepy. How do you know so much about me?"

"You may not realize this, but to most guardians you are a celebrity. Even to the novices around here. I've heard some of them even call you a god." Hearing him say that made my chest ache. That's how we all saw Dimitri. He was a god in our eyes and thanks to him and his training they saw me the same way.

"Let's get this show on the road," I said dropping into a defensive stance.

Taylor dropped down and we circled each other. It had been a while since I had sparred with anyone other than the novices. I had never seen Taylor fight before so I knew none of his moves and I was willing to bet that he had studied my fighting style. He came at with his a roundhouse kick toward my left side. I dropped down to my hands and heard the wind over my head. He had some speed behind him. This was going to be a great fight. I jumped back up and circled him again. This time he came at me with a right hook and I was able to block it and kick him in the knee. He flinched but it didn't move him as much as I hoped it would. I continued my assault and swung around with my left. I felt my hand connect and heard him grunt. I knew that had hurt because my hand was throbbing. He lunged and I dropped down and swiped his feet out from under him. He landed with a loud thud and I heard the air escape his lungs. I pounced and held my hand over his heart.

I got off of him and extended my hand to help him up. "You are an amazing fighter, Hathaway."

"Thank you but call me Rose."

"Rose, your reputation doesn't do you justice. I don't think I was even able to land one hit on you."

"I don't think so either, but don't worry most people can't. I learned from the best." I smiled and grabbed my water bottle.

"How was it training with Belikov?"

"Did you know him?" He shook his head. "He was a great guardian. Tell me what do you know of me from before the incident in Spokane?"

"I knew that you and the Princess had ran away and were brought back two years later. I believe you were in Portland."

"Yes. We had ran away because I felt there was someone after the Princess. At the time we didn't know who it was, but after we had returned we learned it was Prince Victor Dashkov. But if it wasn't for Dim- Guardian Belikov we never would have returned. It was his team that found us in Portland. I was extremely angry that they were bringing us back after so much time, but there wasn't anything I could do about. But if it wasn't for him I wouldn't be here today. He stood up for me and even agreed to train me, so that I could catch up with the rest of the senior novices.

"I trained with him everyday before and after classes and soon I had caught up and surpassed most of my classmates. He was dedicated and passionate about everything in his life and that included his responsibilities of being a guardian. It was really hard when I, we, lost him." I sat there quietly remembering our times together during training. I tried to keep the tears from forming in my eyes but I felt that lump in my throat that wouldn't go away. Eventually Taylor spoke again.

"You were in love with him, weren't you?"

"I don't know what you mean."

"You don't have to worry about it. I can tell by the way you talk about him that you two were in love. He trained you well and I am proud to say that I am working with you." He stood up and headed toward the gym doors.

"Taylor," I called out after him. He turned around and looked at me. "Thanks for listening to me."

He smiled and I noticed that he had a beautiful smile. "You're welcome. But I expect a rematch soon."

I laughed and watched him walk away. I hadn't told anyone of mine and Dimitri's relationship and even though I hadn't said anything about it to Taylor he just knew. I grabbed my things and headed back to my room. My muscles were sore and I really needed a shower. There was a note taped to my door and I pulled it down as I walked into my room.

I tossed my water down and opened the note.

Rose,

I am sorry that I haven't been to see you these past few weeks. After that night I was called by the Queen to go to Court and report on how my class was going. I just got back and found you weren't in your room. I am sorry if you felt that I was ignoring you. I promise you that was not the case. Now, wipe that stupid grin off your face and get your ass over here. Christian

I couldn't help but laugh. I did have a stupid grin on my face and that made it even more funny to me. I pulled my clothes off and jumped into the shower. I let the hot water run over my body until I felt all the soreness leave my muscles. I turned off the water and wrapped a towel around me. I didn't know what to wear because I didn't want him to think I dressed up for him, but at the same time I didn't want him to think I didn't care.

I laughed out-loud at myself. I felt like I was in high school all over again. I felt nervous and yet at the same time I was excited. I walked over to the dresser and opened up the drawer containing my bras and panties. I grabbed a set and closed the drawer. I looked down and noticed something sticking out from under the dresser. I slipped my clothes on and leaned down. I pulled at what seemed to be a piece of paper. When I got it out I fell to my knees. It wasn't a piece of paper, it was a picture of Dimitri and I during our infamous battle during the field experience. I was in the middle of spinning around to kick him but the look on both our faces should have been enough to give us away. I could see the love in both our eyes.

I couldn't believe that he had that picture of us, and after all this time it was still here. It broke my heart to think that he really did care so much about me and just as our life was falling into place he was ripped away from me. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes and threw on a pair of jeans and a red sweater. I wasn't going to let myself cry over him anymore. He was gone and Christian was here in front of me. It was time to move on.

I walked across campus toward Christian's room when I ran into Adrian.

"Hey little Dhampir."

I laughed. Even after almost six years of knowing each other he still called me the same nickname he gave me when we first met. "Hey Adrian."

"Where are you off to in such a rush?" I went to answer and he laughed.

"I'm going to see Christian, if it is any of your business."

"You won't find him there."

"Do you know where he is then?"

He nodded. "He's in my room. Come on I was just headed that way. I'll walk with you."

I walked with Adrian in a comfortable silence. Sometimes I regretted that I could never feel the same way about him as he did for me, but I wouldn't change it. He as a great friend and I loved him a lot. I don't know where I would be if it wasn't for him being my rock after I came back from Russia. He held me together and helped me see that my life wasn't over even though I felt like it was at the time.

"How is your relationship going with Lissa?" I asked as we walked across campus.

"It's going well."

I smiled. I was glad that he finally found someone that made him happy. Lissa was my best friend and Adrian was too. To be able to see them both happy was more than I could ever ask for. We walked into the building and he opened his door for me.

I saw Christian's back out on the balcony and I walked toward the door. I was excited to see him again and to figure out what was really going on between us. I stepped out and wasn't prepared for what I saw.

He had his hand on Lissa's face and she was staring at him. There was so much love in her eyes I just couldn't take it. She looked up and saw me and before she could say anything I turned around and ran out of Adrian's room. I could hear her calling after me but I didn't stop. I kept running without a destination in mind. I ran not thinking about where I was going. When I finally stopped I found myself outside the cabin. I couldn't bring myself to go inside so instead I sat down next to the lake. I felt my eyes stinging and I didn't fight to keep the tears back this time. I cried and let it all out. Just as I was willing to really start to let myself fall for someone else I saw that.

I sat there crying watching the water for hours. I could hear Lissa calling me through the bond but I never answered. Instead I blocked her out. My cell phone rang but I didn't even look at who was calling. I turned it off and put it back in my pocket. I was close to where the wards ended and I heard someone walking around. I dried my tears and grabbed my stake. There shouldn't be anyone out here. As soon as I stood up the nausea I felt when a Strigoi was around hit me. I listened carefully, trying to figure out where the noise was coming from. Just as my eyes started to adjust to the darkness in the trees I saw a figure.

My heart felt like it had stopped when he stepped out of the shadows. In the darkness he looked just like he had the last time I stood out here with him. His brown hair lying across his shoulders slighting curling at the ends. Those dark brown eyes staring into mine with such emotion. But those eyes weren't the same anymore. They were ringed in red. He wasn't the same person I fell in love with anymore.

"Roza," he whispered.

"What are you doing here, Dimitri?"

"I came for you. You won't get away from me this time. I will have you."

I had three options right now. I could either cross the wards and try to kill him, I could run back to the guardian building and alert them that he was here, or I could turn my phone back on and send Lissa a text and then try to kill him. Right now I didn't want to talk to Lissa and I didn't want someone else to kill Dimitri. This was my fight and I had to finish it myself.

"I told you I don't want that life for me. And the Dimitri I knew didn't want that life either."

"But I do now, Roza. And I want you in my life. Just think we can have all of eternity together. We can have our happy ending after all."

It broke my heart to hear him say that. I wanted my happy ending with him more than ever but that dream died the day he was attacked in the caves. I would never have a life with him and I knew that. "You know I can't do that."

"Just come out here and be with me. I love you, Roza."

That did it. I felt the tears streaming down my face. Ever since he left all I wanted was for him to say he loved me again. I don't know what would have happened on the bridge that night if he would have said it but that night was long gone. I carefully walked forward, crossing the wards and walked up to him. I placed my hand on his face and he leaned into it. He wrapped his arms around me. I started to cry and he rubbed my back. In this moment it was hard to think that he was ever a Strigoi but I knew better.

I looked up into his eyes and he leaned down and kissed me. His lips still felt warm on mine. I pulled back far enough to talk, not wanting this to end. "I love you, too, Dimitri." And with those words I sank my stake deep into his chest making sure I didn't miss his heart this time.

He smiled and whispered thank you as the life left his body and he fell to the ground. My nausea disappeared and I knew we were alone out here and I collapsed on top of him and cried. I couldn't stop. Everything that had happened between us came back to me. Every kiss, every look, every moment we ever had. I cried until I had no more tears left and then I cried more. I had killed my one true love in this world and nothing was ever going to change that.

I don't know how long I had been there when I heard voices around me. I was too tired and too hurt to look around. I kept crying and I felt someone pick me up. I screamed for them to put me down but they didn't. I drifted into an unconscious state at some point. All the pain I felt was still there. My heart was broken and I was the one who did it. After more than five years I finally completed my unspoken promise to Dimitri and now I didn't know what I was suppose to do. Everything was different now and I didn't want to wake up. I wanted to stay in the black abyss for all eternity, and I planned on it.