"How eventful was your night?" asked Kakashi, simultaneously both jovial and patronizing. Sasuke had certainly not missed that aspect of the man's personality.
"If I didn't know what a swordsman you are, I'd cut you down where you stand Hatake," grumbled Sasuke, ignoring the question as he attempted to push past. An arm swung out to stop him.
"That's not much of an answer is it, teammate?"
"What do you want to hear? There's nothing to report." To you, anyway, Sasuke thought.
His old teacher laughed again, a clear and genuine laugh - somehow aware that the last living Uchiha before him was lying. He'd always been able to tell. "Did you even look? These forests are not empty, my dear student. Strange things live in these woods: not human, not animal..." At this, Sasuke tensed in the slightest way, a way that only someone who had practically raised him might notice. "Ah...so you did notice things. You're just a liar." No further information was to be drawn from the younger man's lips, so he continued: "Sakura will be round soon; this is where we always meet."
The soft pink shape of Sasuke's lips drew into a grim line as he made to ignore Kakashi and the older man ignored it, strolling about casually and stretching his legs.
"I meant what I said yesterday," came the quiet rumble of Sasuke's voice, "You betrayed our family. I should kill you here and now."
A silver eyebrow arched questioningly: somehow he still looked upon the near-hermit before him as a child - the child he'd helped to mold from a soft, bright-faced boy into the hardened man he'd become. "You've grown tired Sasuke. It's obvious just by looking at you. You don't even care to think about what it all might mean anymore - there's no more of your clan's renowned thirst for greatness in you; just blood lust and anger." A sigh struggled from his lips, the merest hitch in his otherwise calm and steady breathing. "I'd been looking forward to meeting the men that you and your brother were going to become. It seems impossible now though," he paused long enough to wave to a tired but cheerful Sakura as she approached, "And that's a damn shame."
"You left the night that he - that everyone was murdered. was left alone while you ran away." Though the reply was barely audible, it was laced with pain and venom.
"I wasn't running away, I was running after. There is a big difference. You have two options here Sasuke - to learn the raw and horrific truth or to chase your own truth down the end of the sword and into anyone who might shatter your delusions. Good morning Sakura!"
"A good morning to you Kakashi. Sasuke," she greeted, bowing to each in turn. "Thank you for your diligent work, here is your pay." Two identical pouches with a handful of oval coins were dropped into their hands, though the young woman blushed as her fingertips stroked the younger man's accidentally and without a word the grey-haired fellow had started towards the village again, leaving Sakura to scramble in a split-second decision to follow. Sasuke met her light green eyes as she glanced over her shoulder at him and he supposed that in another lifetime she might not have been so bad.
As things were though, he was, in his own opinion, not capable of the affection necessary to be a husband, nor to be tender or perhaps even kind to the fairer sex. His feverish brain was preoccupied by thoughts of men - his brother, his former teacher, even the mysterious Kiba and how he might relate to Naruto.
Waiting what he felt was a safe interval of time, Sasuke sighed and, clutching his newly earned money, trailed along behind the pair with thoughts of exploring a village that had so far brought him nothing but trouble.
Much like the previous day, the villagers of Konoha were milling about, practicing their festival dances, having costumes adjusted, making lanterns both to light the village and to light up the river for the sending of the dead. The fishermen were hauling in their early morning catches from that very same river and above the clamour and din a single hysterical voice arose.
"How can we live with ourselves like this? How can we let this happen? How can we be a
part of it! I, for one, refuse! I refuse! Not after the last time, there is no way!" A young man with unruly, mountain hermit-like hair and red smudges of some sort of paint on his cheeks was running to and fro, attempting to rile up the crowd and begging someone to listen. "How many of you have lost loved ones? What if it was your child or your lover? What if it was you? Could you stand to let it happen? Could you say that it was for the good of the village and...?" He trailed off as an older man, a leader of the village by all appearances, strode up to this naysayer with a grave expression on his aging features. Around them the distressed and saddened faces relaxed a bit and soon they all continued quietly on with their own business.
"Inuzuka, the tradition that you are trying to thwart is a very old one, one that we have all suffered under at one point or another." he cleared his throat and, from Sasuke's position pretending to browse through a series of wooden noisemakers, he could already tell what clan the man was from. The older figure had long, silky hair and pale eyes, pale robes and very similar features to Neji not to mention the songbird who had wound down the previous night for everyone. It was clear that the boy, an Inuzuka, and this family were both from the sprawling clan homes at the other end of the wide main road.
The elder drew himself up to the fullest of his considerable height and continued. "No one is exempt from the ritual, great or small. It was simply Hinata's time."
"Why?" cried the young Inuzuka defiantly. Sasuke was already putting two and two together - if they were talking about Hinata, then he was looking at the same Kiba from outside the shrine doors. Yes, their voices did seem to be the same. So much despair...Sasuke's pale fingers ran over the smooth edges of a toy thoughtfully. He could ask Kiba about Naruto if he so chose. Did he want to?
"Why Hinata? Why your clan's heiress? I know you put her name in for this year! Which is it, because you favour your younger daughter or because you want to get out of the agreement to marry our clans to one another? To think that the council demanded the elitist Hyuugas to marry the unrefined Inuzukas! You know why though, don't you? You had to agree to give me Hinata so that your clan couldn't dominate our village, you power hungry - " Kiba's tirade was interrupted by an abrupt cuff to the side of the head by the head of the Hyuuga family.
Kiba was stunned, but soon narrowed his eyes in anger; he was a tough lad. "You're violating the agreement. The council will hear about this."
"If you're that concerned, you may marry Hanabi since Hinata will not be able to do so."
This statement drew a gasp from Kiba's lips. Sasuke knew that Kiba had professed his love for Hinata earlier and so his mind was abuzz with ideas; thoughts...speculations. "So it's just as much of a nightmare as I thought. You'd sacrifice your own daughter out of favouritism. Hinata is stronger than you've ever given her credit for." Without even a requisite bow, the young Inuzuka heir walked off in the direction of the woods to the south, presumably where Kakashi had been patrolling the previous night. Murmurs of disbelief trailed behind him and, silent as the wind, so did Sasuke.
As another heir, the heir to what was left of the Uchiha clan, Sasuke was very jealous of the Hyuugas, who had been given the option of marrying to keep them in check instead of being slaughtered wholesale. If only it had been such a simple task as a marriage...
"Kiba, you must stop doing this," came the meek lilt of a woman's voice as the nightingale, Hinata, appeared from the trees; by her side was a massive white dog. "All you're doing is upsetting your friends and neighbours. No one has ever escaped this once chosen." Her opalescent eyes lowered with the weight of her emotions.
Her betrothed was silent a moment, his fingers clenched into tight fists. His body was turned towards her completely. The dog whimpered at the atmosphere. "Are you happy to be going?" the words struggled out of Kiba's mouth. "You still love him, don't you? You can't forget him, you asked to go...oh god, I've been such a fool."
"That's not it a all!" she protested, though again it came out meekly and a polite tone; so different from Ino and Sakura, thought Sasuke. "I admired Naruto from afar but all he ever cared about was ending this stupid tradition. I've known since I was a child that I was promised to you but even if I'd had a choice..."
She didn't need to finish her sentence before Kiba drew her into his arms and Sasuke left them to their privacy.
Before he'd realized that Kiba wasn't alone in the thick of the trees, Sasuke had been seriously considering asking the young heir, who had apparently been Naruto's best friend once upon a time, to explain the origins of the fox spirit. All he could surmise from what he'd heard was that Naruto had once been human, though the implications of that were mind-boggling. Whatever the case, he certainly wasn't human any longer. Why did he even care? Could he still convince himself that he was investigating for the love of mystery?
And still the haunted look twisting otherwise gentle tanned features bothered Uchiha greatly. Somehow Sasuke felt as though he'd committed a horrible deed, but suspended disbelief was all that had kept him going in the world thus far. If he were to accept fault, to accept responsibility...if he were to accept the mistakes he'd made then he was certain that it would cripple him to his very core. He was desperately tired in his soul and it was only with outward focus and the pursuit of ever a new goal that allowed him to keep functioning at all. His mentality was such that if he stopped, he would die.
It seemed that solving the mystery of this village was his latest goal, and it had come just in time.
Pondering this revelation, Sasuke made his way around to the the Akimichi shop and decided to get some food while he paid off his debts. It was busy again that day but due to the time of day that he'd arrived, there were a few extra seats available. Somehow Shikamaru was there again, apparently sleeping on the counter. With the sounds of chatter and the thunk of porcelain tableware against wood, it was amazing that anyone could sleep through it at all. Sasuke moved some loose hairs away from where they obscured his almond eyes and snorted in amusement, settling himself into his spot; it had only been two days but it was already beginning to feel like a habit. At a corner table sat Kakashi and Sakura, the latter rather intimidated by the grey-haired man across from her while his gaze continued lazily out the shutters and somewhere past the trees.
After what had happened in his own village, this was the first place that had resembled anything like a home. He was still staring over at his 'teammates' when Chouji came out and set the same meal out in front of him as he'd been treated to the day before. Without even ordering, he was welcomed into the establishment like a regular. Like one of their own. Briefly looking over his shoulder at the sleeping Shikamaru, he set down some coins upon the countertop and grabbed his chopsticks.
Within the background noise of various patrons, Sasuke attempted to pick out information related to Naruto, Kiba or any of the odd goings-on of the village. He hadn't gotten very far, only managing to catch an 'Isn't it all so sad?' before Shikamaru droned out in his lazy voice:
"Interested in the Inuzuka clan, are you?"
Sasuke blinked, but did not reply.
"When you don't talk much, you have a lot of time to think and observe as I do. I noticed you fidgeting every time certain words were mentioned." He sat up a little and poured himself a cup from out of Sasuke's sake bottle. "I figure if you're going to snoop, you might as well snoop openly. It's faster that way." Fingers deeply tanned from behind out in the sun fluffed his high ponytail and yawned a bit.
Sasuke broke off a bit of grilled fish with his chopsticks and chewed slowly while he considered his next question. If someone was offering answers, he was going to take that offer. "Is Hinata Hyuuga going to die?"
The whole room got a bit quieter suddenly, as though everyone had settled in to listen to an answer that they must have already known. It was obviously a subject that was rarely voiced.
"Yes," Shikamaru replied evenly, his eyes drawing into narrow slits. "In the same manner as many before her, according to the traditions of this village."
From the corner, Kakashi was watching the exchange with considerable interest. The same Hyuuga from the day before (Neji, Sasuke recalled) chose that exact moment to drop in for lunch and whatever Nara had been meaning to say, it was effectively silenced by this uncomfortable presence. Neji came across as a very serious character and Sasuke felt that he could detect quite a temper resonating beyond those pale, proud eyes. It reminded him of himself.
The more he sat there in his worn, stained Uchiha attire, the closer he felt sleep creeping towards him. "Thank you for the meal and the information," he said, sealing the exchange with a formal bow as he slipped from his spot, and slid out between Sleepy and Serious.
In one direction was the shrine and Naruto, whose picture was to Sasuke still a few pieces short. In the other was the line of clan homes where death and heartache loomed like a storm cloud. Down the mountain lay the forest and oblivion; the option of passing Konoha by and writing it off as a mistake while up the hill was the waterfall as indicated to him by Kakashi and Sakura. Considering his options briefly, he turned on his geta and forced them upwards.
For all that had been hidden by the trees, Konoha's waterfall was massive and more to the point, loud. The Uchiha heir, who was still a young man despite the lifetimes that had stretched out in his short years, stripped out of his clothes and settled into the task of rinsing his only set of clothes. He frowned softly at the image of his family crest, warped and rippled by the water as it disappeared beneath the clouds of dust and filth released from the cloth. Birds and insects chirped in the trees and the water roared in his ears and he wondered where all the glory of his youth had gone. His clan, his symbol - a white lantern in a bright river of life, too quickly stained with red and all was lost. All of those lights had made their way down the river's currents to some other place and one, fragile though it was, had caught upon some reeds and was left behind. Konoha was merely the latest of such reeds.
Kakashi was right, that traitor. He was so achingly tired and it was only shock and anger that kept him going. One day, he thought; one day it'll sink in. It was ridiculous to even entertain the dream of sanctuary.
His eyelids were dropping as he hung his clothes over the branches of a nearby tree and, like a savage he climbed nakedly into it as he was accustomed to doing between rest stops. A hermit's life had made him wild and he fought sleep's stealthy fingers as they caressed him; a numb, barely waking state settled over him and behind his eyes he could remember what hell was like.
It had been a black night devoid of stars, with cold harsh rain drizzling down and off the roof in thick, wet ribbons. Sasuke was tucked into his futon, the covers pulled up over his face by virtue of how ridiculously cold it was. Water hammered against the walls around him and threatened to make its way inside. Sasuke had chosen to sleep in the same room as his elder brother that evening so that they might share the heat of the square fire pit generally used for cooking. The servants had laid his futon along one edge and Itachi's along another; the fire in the hearth crackled low, glowing a hot orange that was more ember than flame. Adjacent to their bedding was a little pot of water and a dipper with which to douse the fire in the morning.
And so it was that Sasuke had lain in his bed, his back much cooler than his front due to the way that he was facing. He rolled in restless sleep and bumped the edge of the pit gently, which jarred him awake in fear that he might have knocked a spark free. It hadn't, but in the faint light of the room and in between the shadows something registered in his mind: the other futon was empty. His brother was missing.
Sasuke was certain that his brother had not lately taken a lover, nor was he the overly romantic type to bother sneaking into other sleeping chambers on a night like that one. Was he elsewhere in the house?
Silently, Sasuke gathered up a lantern and tiptoed out of the room, sliding the paper-screen door shut behind him. The hallway itself was silent but a commotion sounded in the distance, like a scuffle. It should have occurred to Sasuke then that he'd broken the cardinal rule his father and Master Hatake had instilled in the Uchiha youth - never to leave his sword anywhere.
The youngest member of the clan had just padded his way down the corridor when a silhouette of dark liquid sprayed across the door befor him and a gurgled scream tore at his ears. His jaw dropped and his heart thundered...
To his left, in the shadows at the end of the hallway came a bloodied creature like something out of a nightmare, dragging itself pitifully along the floorboards like a worm. It took him a moment to process that this had been one of their loyal servants, its ruined fingers reaching out towards Sasuke in desperation.
Deep black eyes grew wide with fear and Sasuke nearly dropped his lantern as his shaking fingers clasped it tight. He croaked out words, words he couldn't recall any time after while his free hand grasped at a weapon that wasn't there. Another spray covered the sliding panels before them and as his helpless, frozen feet made to flee he realized that the blood from behind the door had behin to soak into his tabi socks. This was his parents' bedroom, he finally acknowledged, and the second that reality set in he could hear the death cries of a chorus of pitiful souls rising up over the torrents of rain. His fingers, devoid of any mode of defense, scrabbled at the door as though to pull it open but he slipped in the crimson liquid pooling at his toes, still warm as it was. His nails rent at the paper and left a fist-sized hole through which he could see a figure cloaked in black.
"Itachi, no," rasped his father, the illustrious Uchiha Fugaku, reduced to terrified death throes. Itachi...?
"Sasuke, get out of there!" called a powerful voice from somewhere, and he knew without looking that it was his teacher speaking. Unfortunately, this was a distraction that nearly cost him his life. The dull glint of a blade - for it was indeed his dear brother's katana - had com down upon his neck and sliced away at the stray hairs there, had gently split a layer of Sasuke's skin before it came to a stop. Itachi - his Itachi - had meant to remove his little brother's head.
There was no madness in the heir apparent's eyes that night, only grim ruthlessness - Sasuke could feel the urine pooling beneath his sleeping garments. In his periphery was the gruesome end of his parents, but his gaze was locked for the time being, unblinking upon the eyes of his dear Itachi.
"Come find me brother. Come find me and finish this when you're strong enough."
And his brother had gone in the next rumble of thunder and flash of lightning; when Sasuke had finished emptying his dinner all over the floor, he stumbled past the corpse of servant after servant, including the one that had reached out for him in vain. THere was not a cousin, nor a great-aunt, nor even an animal left alive in the Uchiha compound. He had never discovered the body of his teacher, but had known nothing more than that he was utterly, utterly alone.
For two days he'd lain in the filth of his surroundings, unmoving until he'd remembered the golden rule and where his katanas lay. He'd let his family down - he'd let Itachi down. If only he'd brought his weapons, he could have killed his brother with one stroke and committed suicide with another. It was his own fault that he lived in filth and shame. It was punishment.
A gentle snort roused him from his uncomfortable slumber and he jerked himself upright, nearly tumbling straight out of the tree. The hair on his calves tickled and rubbed against the bark as he drew his legs up, somehow noting at the same time that he was being prodded with a broken tree branch.
Hands moved from rubbing a blurry face to snatch at the stick presently, his gaze growing harder as he saw who was at the other end of it.
"Kakashi."
His former teacher bowed, showing off the uniformly grey crop of hair that covered his head. "My Lord."
Sasuke leapt from the tree, swords in hand as he dropped into a crouch, one hand curled in the grass to steady himself. "I've worn the blood of every single one of my family members. Don't think I won't cut you down in this state." And indeed, the fully naked form of Sasuke Uchiha straightened and readied itself for battle.
Kakashi's eyebrows raised the merest fraction. "So you've done it. You've killed your brother." He couldn't hide the surprised from his voice at this.
"I did," Sasuke spat bitterly. "Though he does not appear to have been the end game. He told me himself."
"He said that just to keep you alive," Kakashi chuckled, back in command of the situation again, even down to his lazy pose. "Your brother didn't want you to die along with him."
"What do you know? For all your toughness, you ran as soon as the nightmare began." The quaking, sickened sense of terror resonated even now in his tone. "Why did you come to bother me? I was washing my clothing."
"So I see," Kakashi said wryly as he looked over Sasuke's body. If the man had not been such a notorious womanizer, though youth might have been unnerved by the action. His voice softened a bit. "I left as per your brother's cryptic instructions, to kill a man called Danzo who'd ordered the death of your family...but I'm sure you already know who that is."
Sasuke blinked, unable to believe what his ears were hearing. "D..." he tried to utter the filthy name, failed, and tried again: "You killed him?"
"His head rests in a sack in my home, waiting for the day that you want to see it," his former master said with a sigh. Silence lingered then until, "I knew you'd kill him. He wanted that."
In the distance, birds dared to chirp again and Sasuke's face crumpled into a series of hot, angry tears for the second time in as many days. He really was too tired to continue on this way. So many realizations washed over him like a tidal wave, clogging his nose and throat, leaving his lungs at the point of bursting. His naked form sank onto its knees and then down to his elbows in the dirt, as smears of green grass stained his long, slender limbs. He thought he might be sick.
He gasped for words, unable for yet another time in his life to express what was inside of him. By his side, the half-dried kimono and Uchiha-styled adornments flapped gently on the breeze; a hand rested upon his shaking spine. Who was this man, who understood his madness?