To my little flower Scarlett,

By the time you read this I'll be long gone, I don't know whether you'll really be able to understand what that means but I'm sure Uncle Zach would have explained that my time in this world has come to an end and I won't be coming home. I am so sorry sweetheart. I'm sorry for being so weak and not having the strength to be strong and carry on for the sake of you. But I am so tired my darling daughter, tired of carrying this heavy burden that our family have kept hidden for the last 137 years. I simply cannot do it anymore. I know too many things; I have seen too much darkness within my life to ever believe that I can be free of them in this life. Maybe the next life will offer me that… This isn't your fault Scarlett, this isn't anyone's fault except my own I suppose. I just can't carry on any longer, my life is in shambles and I am weighed down with despair with every waking moment of my existence. I've tried not to let the cracks show, tried my hardest to be a good man, a good father and keep the damage confined within myself but I am now broken beyond saving. There is no going on for me. My best simply isn't good enough anymore. My only hope is that I was strong enough not to let you see how broken daddy was.

I know you may not understand this and you may be angry with me and you can be, because I know I am being selfish. Just know that I tried my best for a very long time because of you. It is because of you Scarlett and your love that I've lasted this long. The only real happiness I have ever known in this life is because of you, from the moment you were born there was this feeling of warmth and love that I never knew was possible. I have loved every second of being your papa and as I watch you sleep I know without a doubt that you are my greatest achievement in this life and I wish I could have given you a happier and normal life, a life that you so justly deserve which would spare you from this unhappiness.

I'm sorry that I wasn't a better father, you deserve so much more than me. Please do not cry Small Lady, you will be okay. It is not my intention to leave you alone in this world, Uncle Zach will take care of you and do a far better job than I ever could. Be a good girl for your uncle and know that I love you. I love you. I love you. I have always loved you my dearest daughter and always will – please forgive me.

Be happy my darling daughter. You are in my heart always…

Dad.

Scarlett let out a small sigh, wiping away the tears that were threatening to fall as she read her father's letter to her once again. It had been eight years since her father had killed himself and she was yet to make any real sense of it. Sure Scarlett knew by which means her father had killed himself, she was aware that he had hung himself and she knew the reason why he had done it but for some reason she still couldn't make any sense of it. She supposed she still had the mentality of her eight year old self when it came to her father's death. When she was old enough to understand the nature of her father's death, Scarlett had spent weeks going through the memories she had of her mother, trying to find the cracks. Trying to find anything that would reveal the pain that he had been dealing with for so long but she could never remember anything. She either didn't remember anything, chose only to remember the good times or her father was better at hiding the truth than he thought he was. Regardless, it didn't change the fact that there wasn't a moment in the day where she didn't miss him and wish that he was still with her and Zach. The day or rather the night that her father had died, Scarlett's entire world had turned upside down and the loss of her father still haunted her. There wasn't a day that went past that Scarlett didn't think of her father. He had been her best friend, the person she saw every day and then one day he was gone. She thought he would always be there and a part of her, even after all these years was expecting to him to just stroll in the front door.

"How was the funeral?"

Looking up from the note Scarlett saw Stefan looking over at her with odd look on his face, it didn't surprise her really. He'd been quieter than usual ever since the accident involving the Gilbert's. Scarlett couldn't blame him for that given what had happened. She probably would have been the same. To have only been able to save one of the Gilberts whilst the other two drowned was a terrible burden to bare.

"Overwhelmingly full and rather depressing as you'd expect, how I hate this town and funerals… Blah! I didn't want to go in the first place but being a part of the founding families means that I had to and do my civic duty and pay my respects." Scarlett replied blowing a raspberry, she personally didn't want to go given her feelings on most people but this was Mystic Falls and going to a funeral and paying your respects was what you did especially when you came from one of the founding families. Scarlett didn't stay along, she skipped out after the funeral as she had done her duties and staying any longer which have caused a lot of unwanted attention. Today wasn't about her, it was about the Gilbert's and giving the people who had loved them a chance to say their final goodbye.

"Why? What happened?" Stefan asked and Scarlett couldn't help but sigh.

"I didn't go to the wake but after the funeral Mrs. Lockwood approached me and asked me how I was doing, she thought that I may be having a difficult time with the loss the town are dealing with, considering that we've just lost two very important members of the founder's council. Given that the last big loss the town suffered was when my father died, she wanted check on me as she worried about me and let me known that she was here for me if I ever needed it. Biggest amount of bullshit I've ever heard, but these are the Lockwood's' we are talking about so it is to be expected…" Scarlett said with a roll of her eyes and Stefan managed to laugh.

"You don't like the Lockwood's I'm guessing…"

"Who does? Mayor Lockwood is a boring ass, Mrs. Lockwood is a functioning alcoholic and don't get me started on what else and their dumb witted son is nothing more than a bully. Then again I don't like any of the founding families, each of them is as bad as each other. The only founding family I do like is the Salvatore's but I may be a little bias for obvious reasons but that doesn't mean that I'm not right about the other families. The rest of them are about as interesting as watching paint dry…" Scarlett replied with a small laugh

"What's that in your hand?" Stefan asked, motioning to the letter Scarlett was holding in her hands as he joined her on the couch she was sitting on.

"My dad's second suicide note, well one of them as he wrote three of them. One of them was the actual suicide note, the other two letters were addressed to Uncle Zach and I, my dad must have felt he had to explain his actions to both of us separately so hence the two extra notes. Only we know about them, Uncle Zach hid them from the police because it was addressed to us and it was nobody's business except ours. The one that the police found with his body simply says 'I'm sorry. Please take care of Scarlett.'…" Scarlett explained with a small frown, she didn't like thinking about the fact that her dad had killed himself as that made her actual picture him doing it in her head especially when she was sitting in the room that he had killed himself in. She didn't know why she was explaining all of this to Stefan like he didn't know because he did, in fact Stefan knew more about her father's suicide given that he had been here visiting when it happened.

"Gabriel loved you very much, more than anything else in this world. That much I know."

"I remember the night he killed himself, dad came into my bedroom like always and checked under my bed for vampires, making a joke about how you were downstairs as you were too big to hide under my bed. After he read me a fairy tale from my storybook like always, that was my favourite part of my day as it was just the two of us. That night he chose the princess and the pea, I remember when he was reading to me that my book was getting wet and I looked up and I saw him crying, which was odd because he never cried, at least not in front of me. I asked him what was wrong and dad smiled at me and said nothing was wrong and he kept going. Like always when he finished, he made sure I was tucked in bed and kissed my forehead but he didn't leave, instead he sat with me until long after I fell asleep. The last thing I remember him saying before I fell asleep was 'I'm so sorry; I'm so sorry Scarlett. Daddy loves you always.' I never saw my father again. Uncle Zach says that he killed himself two hours later." Scarlett said, her eyes welling up slightly as she recalled her last ever conversation with her father. After all these years it was still incredibly painful. She had never realised how much pain her father had been in and the darkness that consumed him so much that he saw no way out from it apart from killing himself. He had gone to so much effort to protect her from it all.

"I remember." Stefan replied and the two of them fell into silence, they both knew that he was the one to find the body and they both knew that they would never talk about it. In an odd sort of way, it was their code of silence. Scarlett would not ask about the finer details about that night and neither Stefan nor Zach would tell her.

"There isn't a day where I don't miss him. My dad is always in the back of mind and I always used to wonder what it would be like if he was still here. A big part of me wants to hate him for leaving me, for not being there like he said he always would be. But I can't do that. After the conversation I had with Mrs. Lockwood it made me nostalgic, I came home and I dug this old thing up. I can just imagine him sitting down to write this letter and every time I read it, I can hear his voice and I can just imagine the sadness in his voice. He was in so much pain and I never realised it. My father was suffering so much, he was very depressed and yet even to the end he was always thinking of me first. How can I be mad at him for that? He loved me so much that he thought that I would be better off without him, that I deserved a better father. I know I can't bring him back but I just wish he knew that I would have never wished for anyone else to be my dad. Gabriel Salvatore was the best father I could have ever wanted and I wish he knew that. Being at Dr and Mrs. Gilbert and then seeing Mrs. Lockwood made me nostalgic about my dad's funeral. You know nothing has changed since then? They still all like to sit and gossip, share theories about why my dad killed himself." Scarlett wearily stated with a small sigh as she swallowed a huge lump in her throat and tried her hardest to keep her emotions in check. That was pretty hard for her to do given that she was sitting in the same room that her father had killed himself in.

"Still? It's been eight years since Gabriel died, I know this is a quiet town where not much happens but you'd think that they would have stopped talking about it now…" Stefan noted and Scarlett couldn't help but notice that Stefan had never stated that her father had killed himself, he always just said Gabriel had died. Scarlett was grateful for that.

"You'd think but it's one of Mystic Falls' greatest mysterious, why Gabriel Salvatore killed himself. Some think it was drugs or alcohol, or there's the one about him never getting over the fact that his wife left him then the mental illness one is very popular but my dad wasn't crazy Uncle Stefan, he may have depressed and yes he did kill himself but he was not crazy. My father was a good man and a brilliant father. He just couldn't cope anymore." Scarlett stated as she was rather defensive about her father.

"I know that." Stefan quietly replied in a rather understanding manner and Scarlett looked up at the ceiling of the living room. It was pretty much the only thing she could do to stop herself from crying as she was venturing into stuff she rarely talked about with Stefan. People always said that talking was a good thing when it came to grief but for Scarlett it never did anything good, all it did was making her upset and cranky. She couldn't be expected to talk about her grief with people who didn't understand anything about her life. But Stefan wasn't like everyone else. He was different. He understood because was a Salvatore and he had been there on the worst day of Scarlett's young life and he was here once again.

"The people in this town just don't understand anything that doesn't conform to their ideals, it's like Stepford here and when something isn't cookie cut perfect like the rest of themselves, instead of trying to understand they just jump to conclusion. They all look at me weirdly, thinking that I'm crazy like my dead father. They also think that this house is cursed because two Salvatore's have died in it and they think I'll be number three. Expect me to kill myself in this house, just like my father did. I hate this town and what t's done to our family, it's ruined all of our lives…"

"But yet it's still home." Stefan noted.

"More's the pity." Scarlett murmured in agreement, she may hate this godforsaken town but it was home and where the Salvatore's belonged and she was a Salvatore for better and for worse.

The people of Mystic Falls were going to have to kill her before they got Scarlett to vacate this town.