Author's Note: Okay, this one's short…again… But that's because it's another information chapter. It would be weird to skip straight to the tragedy part. Again, sorry about that, but longer chapters will be coming up soon. Thank you all for your patience! Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.
Chapter 4
April 13, 1912
It's getting rather boring here on this ship. Sure, there are a lot of things to do here. But I didn't feel like doing anything. I had already read up my supply of books and didn't feel like rereading them. So I simply walked all around the ship.
Wandering around did have benefits and consequences. One benefit was that I got exercise and fresh air. I also had time to think quietly by myself.
There were so many consequences. For one, I had to deal with the complaints of me disappearing from my parents. Next, I sometimes went past Jacob's bedroom where a sound of moaning could be heard. That was something that I didn't need to hear. Lastly, I felt lonely.
But what else was new? I was always lonely. No one had ever loved me truly before. I wondered what that felt like. It must feel good, to have someone love you.
Then what would being in love feel like? I don't think I would fall in love. I was definitely staying away from men altogether. After my experience with Jacob, men weren't appealing to me anymore, no matter how attractive they were.
I was young, true, merely seventeen, almost eighteen in a few months, but that didn't mean I didn't have emotions. But lately, my emotions have been dark and depressing. I had never liked to talk much. But this feeling was so…frustrating. I felt like I was in prison, trying desperately to get out in order to breathe.
How long would this part of my life go on? Some say that a teenager has a bright future ahead of them. Somehow, I think I am a rare exception to that rule.
AN: So, yeah, a little something on Bella's thoughts… I know it was short, but please try to understand! I think the next chapter is longer. I don't know, I'll have to check. I hope you enjoyed!