I don't own RWBY, Fallout NV, or any other copyrighted lines, phrases, or expressions.
English: beep boop I'm a robot beep boop
Robot language: beep boop I is a robot as well beep boop
The Mojave Wasteland at mid-day
The screen focus on the dusty Road when a pair of boots raced across. After they passed by before another set of boots raced across before a hovering Robot. The scene remains empty till a trail of multiple scorpion legs raced towards them. The screen raises to show that Ruby, Six, and ED-E were running for their lives as a herd of multiple Radscorpions wearing a mixture of blue and red party hats chased after them. (Play wild wasteland perk theme)
"Oh, Oum Run!" Ruby screams as she raced past Six with an egg in her hand.
"Sweat, Marry and Joseph! Why did you think stealing a mother Radscorpions egg was a good idea!" Six shouts as he struggles to keep up with Ruby.
"I was hungry! How am I supposed to know it was a birthday party!" Ruby shouts back.
"Beep scared boop, beep." (I don't know how about the fact that there was streamers and a canvas signed in human blood wishing Tom happy B-day!)
"Oh, shut it R2 trash2!" Six shouts as he pulls a grenade from his satchel and tossed it behind him.
After leaving Primm a few hours back they ran into one weird and bad scenario after another. First, they met a group of bounty hunters looking for some nomad who originated from nowhere. One of the bounty hunters who was wearing all red clothing and a decaying sombrero became super jealous of Ruby's Crimson hood and tried to take it by force. But he was knocked unconscious by their leader whose small assistant then apologized for the inconvenience of their coworker and gave Ruby a copy of Grognak the barbarian from her cumbersome backpack? Then they discovered an abandoned Highwayman police station with three dead guys in front of police cruiser. They heard something moving in the back so when Six open it up, he was assaulted by an Asian midget... who was only wearing a speedo underwear and wouldn't stop beating at Six's head with a loosen lug. Once Ruby managed to pry the man off Six he bolted into the desert. For this inconvenience they managed to find a blue star bottle cap and a few grenades along with a lot of empty bottles of whisky and tequila. Finally, that brings us to now with Ruby accidentally finding a lone egg by the side of the road to which she greedily grabs it to turn and see its younger brother and its entire Radscorpions family was getting ready for its birthday.
As the three ran for their life's through a decaying open tunnel Ruby finally stopped and let go of the egg before running again. The Radscorpions for the most part was happy that their egg was returned but some still followed till the grenade blew up in their faces. After making it through the entire tunnel they stopped to rest for a small bit by a decaying delivery truck.
"Huff, Huff... never steal from Radscorpions... EVER!" Six shouts as he stands up after catching his breath.
"Sorry, we just ran out of food and I didn't want to say so when I saw the egg, I was hungry for an omelet..." Ruby pleaded when Six held up his hand stopping her.
"I'm sorry, did you say we ran out of food?" Six asked with an annoyed look on his face.
"Um, don't get mad. But remember when that angry knife lady was looking for a nomad... I sort of ran into him and he looked super hungry and tired so I may have given him some... all, of our food supplies." Ruby explains nervously as the expression from Six's face turned from annoyed to downright furious. "But he did give me a bag of caps and his pet rock."
Ruby then shows a small leather bag with a handful of caps inside along with a rock with googly eye glued to the face. After a few minutes a tumble weed rolls behind Six before ED-E broke the silence.
"Beep, smug boop, Beep." (She's an idiot... is she your emergency rations?)
"... um what did ED..." before Ruby could finish her sentence Six grabbed the pet rock and tossed it a great distance away in rage before turning to Ruby who was flinching in fear.
"Up the hill, NOW!" He shouts sternly causing Ruby race up the hill in a panic leaving a trail of dust. As Six coughs blowing as he wipes away the dust, he looks up to see a small figure was already up the hill.
"...Beep, surprised Boop, Beep." (...That is some mystical shit.)
"Yep... must be a mutation, that or this is what's it like to survive being shot in head." Six said in a begrudgingly manner as he walks up the hill alongside ED-E.
After five minutes Six finally made it up the hill to see Ruby looking up at two makeshift scrap metal statues of some kind. At the bottom of those two metallic behemoths laid a plaque dedicating to the desert Rangers treaty with NCR.
"Wow. Six, ED-E this is so... oh um so are you not mad at me anymore." Ruby said as she fiddles with her thumbs.
"Beep, angry Boop, Beep." (I'm still angry and I don't even eat food.)
"... (sigh) I can't stay mad at you." Six said with a sigh as he walked past her.
"Wait really?" Ruby asked slightly surprised and relieved.
"Beep, confused boop, Beep." (Wait really?)
"Yea. Being angry at you is like being angry at a puppy, your too dumb to know any better." Six said leaving Ruby completely stunned.
"Beep, cheerful boop, Beep." (lol, lol, lol, lol)
"Go on there's a bar over there. Go buy a Nuka while I see if there is any job to buy back some of the food you lost." Six said as he walked past a little farther down the road before turning around. Ruby was just about to complain or apologize but at this point Six just doesn't care.
"Go on Ruby, go get the Nuka, yes you want the Nuka, that's a good girl Ruby." Six taunts Ruby like she was a dumb puppy causing Ruby to get the message that he wants to be left alone. So, she reluctantly left Six and heads towards the dive in bar with ED-E following behind her laughing in his robot voice.
Once she was at the door to the dive bar, she hesitates on opening it. She quickly turns around and looked up at the eyebot.
"Um ED-E... do you think it's safe to enter?" Ruby asked the flying robot. "I mean, I know I'm kinda young but age isn't the problem it's just, is it safe?"
"Beep, mathematical Boop, Beep." (I have traveled from the east coast to Chicago to this god-awful wasteland with some of the most horrific imagery of the evils of mankind recorded on my memory banks. Suffice to say I have seen a multiple set of bars, both old and new. All I can say is after two hundred and half years after the apocalypse that the percentage of a child walking into a backwater bar without supervision of any kind is safe has dropped to 30%. 15% When talking about you.) ED-E responds.
"... So, it is safe?" Ruby asked having no idea what ED-E said.
"Beep, Deadpan Boop, Beep" (Yes that is totally what I said... idiot.) ED-E responds.
"Alright then I'll buy you some oil, if you drink Oil." Ruby said opening the door only to be grabbed by someone.
"Ahhhh, you lied to me ED-E! Help me!" Ruby screams as she was pulled into the bar leaving the eyebot Outside.
"Beep, Boop, Beep" (... I try to warn you.)
Inside the bar was a mad house. Before Ruby was even outside some drunk did something stupid and it resulted in an instant bar fight. Fist were flying, furniture was being used as weapons, all why'll the bartender tries to bring order. When Ruby opened the door a drunk mistake her hood for a drape and quickly grabbed ahold of it before tossing her at another patron who barley ducked. Once Ruby scrambled to her feet it was like a mosh pit. Men and women brawling with each other, bumping into one another with no reason why other than someone spilt their drinks. One red head seemed to be king of the hill as she kept five men below her with brutal kicks and punches. As Ruby squirms to get out a hand grips her shoulder.
"EEEEEKKKKK! Get off me!" She screams as she grabbed ahold of his hand and turns around to punch a hooded person in the face.
Once he fell backwards into a group of brawling men, she was part of the fight. She quickly punched a man with a weak punch before ducking under his swing that hits another guy. Unlike her sister Ruby didn't really know how to throw a proper punch, but she can easily dodge one. As she barely avoided the stray fists someone grabbed her from behind. As she struggles to get out of the woman's grasp that same hooded person from before came running forward from in with a stool. He smashed the back of her head with the now splintering stool before being dragged back into the crowd of people. This caused the woman to drop Ruby and seek out the hooded figure for revenge. As Ruby pulls herself to her feet when the same woman with red hair nearly knocked Ruby back down to the ground when she tossed someone at her. Seeing how this is crazy she then tries to crawl herself to freedom when the sudden blast from a Winchester model gun silence the entire bar causing the patrons to duck and subconsciously crush poor Ruby.
"Ok people you had your fun, but if you don't stop now, we will be forced to use beanbag rounds on you." An NCR troop announced as two other troopers with hunting shotguns stand behind them. Once people resized the fun was over, they all stand up, some helping each other up despite knocking them down to begin with.
As the crowd starts to leave or went back to their seats if it wasn't destroyed. Once gone Ruby slowly got up onto her knees. She was almost crushed under the crazed and drunk mob but she managed to barley pull herself out. As she looked around, she felt tired and weak. So, as she sat their pondering on what just happened a shadow formed over her. Ruby looked up to see the same hooded figure from before.
She now had a good look at the hooded figure. He had a black short sleeve hoodie with orange trim on the inside with a rusty pair of welding goggles hanging around his neck. On his chest is a decaying dark tan NCR trooper bulletproof chest piece cover most of his upper torso. On his right sleeve seemed to be a dirty white NCR fingerless sleeve glove branching up to his elbow with a dark tan elbow guard in place to hold it up. On the right side was a white gauntlet sticking out of a torn hazel brown combat glove with an orange sleeve coming out of it and reaching his elbow. He is wearing a pair of blue jeans that on one side is ripped open to expose some parts of his knee. It was held up by a single brown belt that had a dark olive-green cantina inside a dark tan casing attached to it and a secondary loose belt strapped to his body holding a holster gun. At his feet were a pair of brown cowboy boots with his pants over them. As he stood over her, he held out his hand out to help her out. Ruby hesitated took his hand before he helped her up.
"Thanks... sorry about punching y..." Before Ruby could finish her apology the hooded figure quickly and surprisingly hugged her.
"Oh, Oum of all the people to find in a bar I never thought it would be you." The hooded figure said in a familiar tone.
"J-Jaune?" Ruby asked with widened eyes. The hooded figure then steps back before pulling down his hood to reveal a familiar face with blonde scraggly hair with some small tears of excitement and happiness forming in his right eye.
"Oh, Oum it is you!" Ruby shrieked in happiness as she nearly dragged him to the ground when she jumped on him to hug.
"Whoa easy there, you may not punch like your sister, but you can still throw one." Jaune chuckles in pain from the recent bar fight.
"Oh, Oum sorry about that Jaune." Ruby apologizes as she gets off him. "Wait how did you get here?"
"Heh, well that's an interesting story. You see after the dust storm I wazzzzzaaaaaawwwwwwhaaaa!" Before Jaune could even start to explain his story, an electric current was sent through him causing him to stutter before falling down to the ground with static electricity running through his hair. Ruby quickly looked up to see ED-E with an electric baton module out.
"Beep, smug Boop, Beep." (I told you shouldn't have gone in, lucky you that I'm a good robot who comes equipped with a stun baton. Yes, your welcome.)
"ED-E! Why did you zap Jaune!" Ruby said as she shook an unconscious Jaune.
"Beep, confused Boop, Beep?" (Who the F#*k is Jaune?)
As Ruby kept trying to shake him awake while the same red head from before who was on top during the brawl walked up behind Ruby. "Damn, did the flying toaster tazed pretty boy? Well congratulations Johnny boy you discovered something else you can't stand, electricity."
Beep, angry Boop, Beep." (Watch it lady that was set to stun, wanna see what happens when I set it from mildly annoyance to aggressive bear attack.) ED-E threatens.
"... I have no idea what you said but seeing that kinda tone countless times, you are either flirting or threatening me. So, I'm goanna presume the lateral and say that if you try anything then I'll reduce you to scrap metal and have some egg head rebuild you, just so I can destroy you again." The woman threatens sternly causing the ED-E to back off.
She then grabs ahold of one of his arms before looking over at Ruby. "Mind helping me carry the kid over to the bar?"
"Um, sure." Ruby agrees as she takes ahold of his other arm and helps her carry Jaune to a stool by the bar. "Wait how do you know Jaune?"
"Why are you his girlfriend or something, seems kinda young to be shagging him don't you think." The woman said as the two leans Jaune over like he sleeping.
"W-Wha, oh no no no no no no! Me and Jaune are good friends that's all, honest." Ruby said frantically as she blushes.
"Uh hu, well in any case what's your name stranger, I would guess your names Phrrya but he claims that she has redder hair then me." The woman said as she points to her hair.
"I'm Ruby Rose. A good friend of Jaune." Ruby greets as she held out her hand.
The woman looked down at her hand before she spits in hers and shakes it to Ruby's discus. "Sharon Cassidy or Cass for short. People used to call me "Whiskey Rose" back West, before I punched enough people, so now they say it, but quiet and when I'm not around.
"Um why If I may ask?" Ruby asked nervously as she desperately tries to shake the spit from her hand.
"Mostly on account of my cheeks being red when the whiskey hit and the other part due to my dad's o'l pendant." Cass said holding up a Rose shape pendent around her neck.
"Cool, my dad would try and teach me how to fight with my fist, but I learned more from my uncle who taught me how to use rifle." Ruby remarks as a bartender walks over with Cass usual.
"Ah, well when did you meet Jaune? This supposed Remnant I hear him bantering about?" Cass asked as she unplugged the cork from her bottle.
"Um sort... we met in the um northern part of California, at school." Ruby explains sheepishly before turning to the bar keep. "Got any Nuka?"
The bar keep nods and pulls out the soft drink placing it on the table. She quickly paid for the soda and removed the cap before chugging it down. "Ah, so anyways how did you meet Jaune?"
"Well that's a long story." Cass said before taking her first swig from her bottle. "But I recon you have time to kill."
Cass then turns to Ruby before beginning her tale. "A week ago, during a late-night happy hour I was completely shit faced drunk and had to piss, but the bathrooms were in usage. Some pilgrims from out west had come to spend their money in Vegas and made a pit stop for some drinks. They clearly can't hold their liquor so as they spent the rest of the night vomiting their guts out. The rest of us had to find an alternative way of doing our business."
She then pauses before taking another swig of her drink before continuing her story. "Anyways I left to find a bush when I was just about to undo my belt when I heard someone groaning like a sick dog. At first, I thought it was one of those travelers trying to sneak a peek so I quickly grabbed my gun and shot into the bush and out falls this boy who was lucky to be wearing armor. Anyways after doing my business somewhere else, I dragged his ass before the Rangers next door so I can have a word with their folks. Turns out he isn't registered as someone in the books. After a few hours he woke up to find an arm guard watching him. The troopers though he was some kind of Legionary spy."
"Legion? You mean those bad people across the river?" Ruby asked as she took a swig from her Nuka.
"Bad is putting it mildly. More like no good down right evil slaven, raping, fucking bastards that outa be put down like a rabid bighorn, on sight." Cass said with a tone of spite and rage but she calmed herself down before taking a swig from her whisky. "Anyways once he reassured us that he wasn't a Legionary spy we let him go and gave him something to replace the armor that was destroyed by my shooting."
"I know Jaune wouldn't work with anyone that sounds as bad like the Legion, but how did they know he wasn't? Jaune isn't the most convincing person I know." Ruby asked as the sound of Jaune groaning in pain can be heard in the background.
"Heh That's how we know. Legionaries are trained to commit suicide instead of being captured so when he confessed to not being a Legion spy his sheepish answer was a dead giveaway. That and the picture of him and all seven sisters." Cass answers before finishing the bottle and raising her hand for a second bottle.
Just as the bar keep came back with another round, Jaune starts to stir before raising his head slowly. "Ugh, what just happened?"
"The flying toaster knocked you the fuck out Johnny boy. Lucky for you, your friend's bot had it set to stun." Cass said pointing to the ED-E.
"Beep, angry Boop, Beep." (Watch it unless you want some, ginger b$#ch!) ED-E responds before flying over to Jaune's side who freaked out a bit by backing up away from it.
"Ruby what is that!" Jaune asked as he got behind Ruby.
"Oh, that's a robot I repaired back in Primm. He's called ED-E." Ruby answers.
"So why did it shock me?" Jaune asked still hiding behind Ruby. Before either could answer, the door opens and in walks Six grumbling about something.
"Oh, hay Six, did you find any work?" Ruby asked casually forgetting why they were here in the first place.
"As well as one can expect. No jobs so unless you have friends with caps to give, we are goanna have to go back and see if any of the Radscorpions fragments are edible." Six complains as he raised two fingers up before a bartender points to the bottle of whiskey on the shelf.
"Oh... well anyways why'll you were out I ran into my friend here and I was kinda wondering if he can come with us?" Ruby asked nervously as the bottle slide over to him.
Six looked over to Jaune who gave a nervous chuckle. If Ruby looked like a Wasteland pacifist then Jaune can only be described as a Pre-war time travel who got stuck in the worst place in history.
"Really? Ugh, look if he can get us to Nipton then he can tag along cause why not. If he's as green as you then buy the next three rounds then he can come." Six said as he uncorked the bottle.
"But I only have five caps left." Ruby said sadly as she held up the remaining caps in her hand before Cass slide enough to pay for six drinks easily.
"On the house kiddo." Cass said as she chugged the next bottle of Whiskey.
"Really, you mean it?" Ruby asked with a look of relief and happiness.
"Eh, my Caravan and the employees of mine who worked for me had died in an ambush by raiders a short while ago, or at least that's what I heard. Jaune helped pull myself together and this is the least I can do for not trying to sue me for nearly killing him." Cass explains as she was about to open her third bottle when Ruby raced over nearly knocking her off her seat with a hug.
"Really, oh thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" Ruby said as she hugged Cass.
"Um, your welcome. Kid, I'll take the hug but if you make me spill this whisky then god help you when you wake up with missing teeth and a black eye." Cass said in a stern but fair tone.
"Oh, um sorry." Ruby said apologizing.
"Thanks Mrs. Cassidy, I'll buy you the next drink before I leave." Jaune said as Cass rolls her eyes while he reaches for his pocket before realizing he left his cap Wallet elsewhere. "Um just let me grab my stuff first."
"Oh, I'll go with you. I got so much to tell you." Ruby said with excitement as she practically dragged Jaune out the door.
"Those two are a strange bunch, where you dig her up... Six was it?" Cass asked as she began to drink her third bottle.
"Funny thing she actually dug me up when I was left to die in a shallow grave." Six answers as he begins to take a long swig from his glass. "So, what about you? How did you meet blonde?"
"Eh, shot him thinking he was a peeping tom." Cass answer's before taking another swig from her drink.
"Well then, to strange times and meeting strange people." Six said as he raised the bottle in the direction of Cass.
"Heh, yep to strange times." Cass said agreeing while tapping glass with Six before the two start to drink.
Outside by the Statues
"Um Ruby the barracks is the other direction." Jaune pleaded as Ruby dragged Jaune over to the statues. Once there she quickly stopped and turn around.
"Jaune did your um tell Cassidy about Remnant?" Ruby asked as her excited tone switched to nervousness.
"Um kinda, I told her some stuff like Beacon and my team... and that I'm from a different world, but in my defense, she was extremely drunk." Jaune said in his defense.
"Ok as long as she doesn't believe you this should be fine." Ruby mutters to herself before looking up at Jaune. "So, Why'll in Goodsprings I met this robot who told me of someone who could help us get home."
"Alright then who is thi...wait a robot-like ED-E?" Jaune asked getting off hand for a second.
"Um no, Victor is much bigger and has one wheel and a tv with a cartoon cowboy on the front. Kinda cool actually." Ruby explains before shaking her head and getting back to the point. "So anyways Six agrees to take us to this person but we need to keep the fact that we are not from this world a secret.
"Ok um sure, but why?" Jaune asked with a puzzled look on his face.
"Because he will probably freak out and leave us on the side of the road... that or turn us in for crazy lab stuff, like in that old horror movies." Ruby said with wide eyes of fear.
"Uh hu, um I don't think he's goanna turn us in to some mad scientist. But the part of leaving us behind sounds probable so ok. I'll pretend to be born here on this planet." Jaune said agreeing. Ruby then nods and the two began to walk towards the barracks as the screen slowly pulls up.
"So where is this person we have to meet?" Jaune asked as the screen moves above him
"In New Vegas at one of the casinos." Ruby said as the sun starts to set in the West with the red light of the afternoon starting to creep over in the east.
"Wait then why head south?" Jaune asked as the screen turns slightly to the right to see smoke from a small town south of here.
"Oh because of the Deathclaws." Ruby answers.
"...What's a Deathclaw?" Jaune asked.
Hello everybody Wombag1786 here. Let's answer some Q or C.
From a54321: Thanks, this story has been going south but it's goanna go a bit east then north then west a bit before going north again. Afterwards it's heading all over the map.
Thanks for writing a54321
From Luckenhaft: Eh unlike you and Six I actually enjoy coasters. Still good to know you can relate to him. That a goal as a writer like hopes to achieve to make this story more interesting for you. As for the blood stains I'm sure she won't notice... under the ash and soot that was once a human being. As for another thing... Six Really love his desperado hat, it too has a 1 to P. And for Jaune he's actually being tossed around by Cass. Not the cougar gang. (Lol btw) as for who is in Freeside, here's a hint. He is going by the name similar to an unarmed weapon that you can buy at Mick and Ralf. Under the GRA dlc. Hopefully this is informative, now again about the fifty caps you owe me.
Thanks for the comment Luckenhaft
From Guest: Wait, what breaaazzzzzaaaaaawwwwwwhaaaa!
Beep boop Beep. (Well of course it ain't cheap. You forgot to use your model X5ST stun baton. That or your X23 portable laser gun. Humans will give the bread away for free if you use these tools as currency. Or simply be a toaster.)
Beep boop Beep (Thanks for writing possible fellow Enclave made machine.)
Beep boop Beep (Hello meatbag ED-E here, filling the role for the now... 'unconscious' Wombag1786. Let's talk about the chapter, before the meatbag here wakes up.)
Beep boop Beep (So The meatbag now known as Jaune joins the party. Yay, another winey turd to look after who also can't understand me... joy. Bedsides my opinion on the matter, to those who want to know why Jaune ended up in the NCR outpost instead of anyone else. Well Wombag1786 plan on Jaune becoming a role model for both the NCR and the Brotherhood later on in this totally inaccurate portrayal of my story, so what better place to start then drooling unconsciously in a backwoods bar. Also, apparently the chapter name fits the story quite well. 'A lone knight in a bar fight.' I still don't get why humans love sentences that rhyme.
Beep boop Beep (So with that out of the way below is the next questions for a chance to see what it was like when the meatbag first arrived, and the second question prize is about Six's past. Along with the question is Jaune's Bio, free to read. Good luck meatbags! This is ED-E signing off for Wombag1786.)
In the game. How many bottles of whiskey does it take for Cass to get drunk? Prize is a Chibi tale of Jaunes first week in the Mojave Wasteland.
The bonus question is, what is a Real life 'atomic cocktail' made from. List it in the comment and if corrected then a glimpse at Six's childhood will be submitted for the next chapter.
Jaune BIO
Name: Jaune Arc
Karma: Neutral good
Age: 17
Skills:
Melee
Survival
Barter
S: 5
P: 6
E: 6
C: 6
I: 4
A: 3
L: 4
Race: Caucasian
Looks: Blonde hair, blue eyes, no scars
Starting weapons: service rifle, 9mm, Broad machete
Starting clothes: his iconic hoodie his armor replaced with a bulletproof vest and only has one arm guard why'll the other is replaced with an NCR trooper sleeve. He still wears his jeans but instead of tennis shoes he has brown cowboy boots. Has welding googles around his neck.
Traits: good nature, Wild wasteland
Occupation: Huntsman in training
Personal items: crushed scroll, picture of him and his sister's, an NCR cantina, a cap wallet, an empty whisky bottle with the words on the label 'you owe me the next round' (gift from Cass.) a military rough sack.