Hearing Lawson's words James looks at him, trying to take it all in "What happened to her, and where was she?"
Standing still for a short while Lawson looks at James wondering how much to tell him "I don't know, it all happened so suddenly. We were at Docklands"
Looking at Lawson "we, as in mum and you?" seeing him nod "What were you doing at Docklands with her?"
His reply simple "Having dinner?"
Seeing James look at him in surprise "you and mum having dinner" then a moment later his voice slightly louder "Well you broke the rules when you got her pregnant, so trying to break every one with her?"
Feeling a hand on him, James turns to face his girlfriend "James don't, you both don't need this?" then looking at Lawson she smiles "I'm Emily". Looking at his girlfriend then back at Lawson his voice bitter "That's Lawson the guy who got knocked up my mother got her pregnant, whilst going out with someone else and now she's here in hospital and could die. Anyone would think that they were teenagers not that my mother is 45"
Putting her arms around James and walking away with him "Don't take it out on him, look at him James, I don't know what has happened between them, but he obviously cares deeply for Kerry and I think she feels the same"
Looking at Emily and then Lawson James smiles before pulling her towards him.
Walking back at short time later James sits down near Lawson "Sorry" then looking at him "You and mum, what's happening between the two of you?"
Looking at James, he shrugs "I took her out to dinner"
Looking down "That's all, You had to have some feelings for her, to have slept with her or you just like one night stands or cheating on your girlfriend"
Looking back at James "I don't have to explain myself to you…I care deeply for Kerry, always have" before getting up off the seat.
Walking outside the hospital taking a deep breath, Lawson walks over to a seat, sitting down. Putting his head in his hand, he can't lose Kerry not now. After all these years, the feelings he had for her, he could never act on, she was his superior, the one night after Grace died, they wanted to lead to more but couldn't. What if one of them left TR.
Trying to control his emotions, he was only getting used to the fact that he and Kerry were becoming parents.
Why is it hurting so much, he can't lose her not now. He didn't want to be the guy who got Kerry pregnant he wanted to be so much more in her life, stuff the rules, the thought of losing her, was too much to bear did he have more feelings for her than just good friends. He just couldn't imagine a life without Kerry in it.
Feeling someone near by he looks up seeing James sitting down. "mum cares a lot about you, or even more" seeing the look of surprise on Lawson's face "its only small things, but each time she says your name when she talks about TR, its different than the others, and there is something in her eyes" then looking up at Lawson "Like when you talk about her too."
After a short period of silence, James looks at Lawson "If you have any feelings for her tell her before its too late" before walking back inside.
Watching James walk back inside, why is it taking so long, did he love her, was it not that long ago he proposed to Shannon, Was it because she was carrying his baby, the thought of losing her terrified him, he couldn't imagine his life without her.
What about Shannon, did he still love her. Confused Lawson stands up, what was taking so long, staring across the lawn of the hospital, he remembers all the times they have together, the first time she came to TR, how he didn't' want her there, TR was fine without bringing someone else in, someone who thought she was great, annoying Lawson, but as time moved on, there was so much more to her, he began seeing her in a new light. The few weeks after Grace had died and protecting Bobby, and the decoy getting killed, affected her, leading them to find comfort in each other a few times. Is that all she was to him, someone to go to. Shaking his head no, he is sure it is more, love does he love her or is she only a friend, why is it that the fear he is feeling about her.
Walking back inside, Lawson sees James "any news?" Shaking his head "Nothing, why is it taking so long, that can't be a good sign" He didn't have any idea why either.
Hearing footsteps they look up, seeing the doctor walk towards them, following him in silence, as they enter a room "you have a baby girl, she is doing fine now, she is in an incubator, but if you want to see her, the nurses can take you there soon" Nodding, all he wanted "and Kerry?"
Opening the curtain "she's stable we managed to stop the bleeding, and all her vital signs are stablising now, the next 24 hours are still critical but it is looking promising. She will have to stay in hospital for a while, but it seems mum and daughter are fine"
Letting out the breath that he was holding, Lawson turns to face James, seeing relief on his face also before facing the doctor "when can we see her?" "Follow me?"
Sitting by her bed Lawson sees James leave the room, stroking her hand and head, it all had become clear now he had to have her in his life, he couldn't lose her, he wanted to be part of her and his daughters life, leaning over he gives her a short sweet kiss whispering "I love you Kerry, I want you?"
Hearing a gasp he looks up, seeing Shannon there, "Shan" he calls out before getting up off the chair.
Seeing Shannon outside Lawson walks up to her "Shan what are you doing here?"
Not even looking at Lawson "I really don't know now. Stella told me what happened, I didn't want you to be alone, I thought you might need someone. Stupid me hey"
Reaching out to touch her arm "don't" then looking at him "How long have you been in love with her for. We're been broken up for 6 weeks Lawson 6 weeks and only 9 weeks ago you proposed to me, was it all a joke did I mean nothing to you?"
Looking at Shannon's face "Of course not Shan. You needed space Shan, you pushed me away I don't know why, you would never tell me"
"So that's my fault and your punishing me for that? Shannon interrupts not believing what she is hearing
Shaking his head "No, I tried to apologise and make it up for you, give you more space. Kerry and I have grown closer, it just happened. I've got a kid now Shannon, would you ever be able to accept that, have it part of our lives?"
Trying to stop the tears forming in her eyes "I dunno Lawson" her voice rising "I was still trying to get over the fact that my fiancee cheated on me with our boss and then I find out, she's having his baby" then looking up at him her voice louder "then I hear him say I love you, 6 weeks Lawson after we broke up, and 9 weeks after you proposed" her
voice rising "It took you only 6 weeks to say I love you, how long have you been in love with her for" then shaking her head "no I don't want to know, go back to your girlfriend"
Looking at Shannon, he never wanted to hurt her "I'm sorry Shan, I never meant to hurt you, I have to get back inside"
Watching Lawson walk back, Shannon leans against the pole, the tears now falling freely, the only thing she can hear is Lawson's voice saying "I love you" to Kerry over and over again. How could he say that so soon.
Walking back inside the hospital, Lawson stops at the nursery, seeing his daughter for the first time, walking back to the room, he sits next to Kerry's bed, stroking her hair and hands again. "Kerry wake up, you've got to wake up, we have a baby girl, you and me, she's beautiful just like you, when your out of here, we'll go out to dinner, I want to be with you Kerry, I love you"
Hearing James's voice "I knew it, about time you told her. I know she feels the same way" then looking at his mum lying there "You know mum, see if she can be a better mum this time"
Looking up at James, he knows that Kerry doesn't think much of her parenting "Your mum would do anything for you James anything. She scored drugs for you, did you know she got investigated by ESD because of you, she loves you and do anything"
Looking at his mum lying there "she's a great cop Lawson and I know she loves me, but you know nothing about us" reaching out to his mum's hand and looking at Lawson "she is improving and who knows, maybe my step sister is lucky and she'll have a father." shaking his head "can't believe that I have a sister after all these years"
Watching James walk out of the room, he looks back down at Kerry, holding her hand stroking it, seeing her lying there with the tubes and machines around her, his feelings clear and one thing he wants to be with her.
Looking at her face he sees her eyes open "Well hello sleepy head" Seeing her look around he calls out, as the nurses comes in.
After the nurses leave, she gives him a half smile "What happened?"
Leaning closer to her "We have a baby girl" Seeing her look up at him a smile on her face raising her eyebrows as she tries to sit up "where is she, I want to see her"
A couple of hours later….putting Kerry in a wheelchair, he pushes her to the nursery, going inside over to the humidicrib, looking inside, she looks so small. Putting her hand inside, touching her daughter for the first time, feeling Lawson's hand on her shoulder she looks up at him, "we have a daughter"
Nodding at her "she's beautiful, just like her mother" Feeling Lawson's mouth on top of her head, she now wonders what the future holds now that she is born, can she be a better mother this time .