Chapter 4

It was a cold Saturday morning and Sully had left early to go into town for supplies; the three of them were heading out to the reservation this afternoon to see Cloud Dancing and Snow Bird. Loren had given him a bag of candy for Hanna, while Dorothy asked him a barrage of questions about Michaela. When they had both stopped in yesterday to drop off Hanna, Michaela had revealed to them that she was a doctor after they saw the stitches on Sully's hand.

Of course the moment he had ridden into town this morning, there were endless comments about the news. The townspeople were fascinated by this woman and were eager to learn more about her and her secret past. Sully wasn't angry at his in-laws for spilling the beans, that was just how they were, but he didn't give away much, knowing the details Michaela had shared with him privately were not his to pass on.

He was still trying to grasp the situation himself. This beautiful, intelligent, amazing woman... his thoughts lingered here for a while as he gathered a few things from the store. He smiled as he thought of the way her crooked smile appeared when she was embarrassed. He found his reverie interrupted by Loren who had begun teasing him about the faraway look in his eye. Unable to come up with a suitable response he found his rescue when Charlotte entered the store with Brian and Colleen.

"Sully!" Brian shouted in delight. "Where's Hanna?" he asked as his eyes searched the store.

"Sorry Brian, she's at home today".

"Awwww, I wanted to show her this feather I found," he said glumly scuffing his boots on the floor. The adults laughed as he was quickly distracted by the jars of candy.

"So her father used to call her Mike?" Dorothy asked.

"That's what she told me," Loren replied. "Said he was expectin' a boy, but she came along instead," he chuckled.

"So... she's Dr. Michaela Qui... Sully?" Dorothy asked with raised eyebrows. "That's quite a mouthful". Brian came back with a few candies in hand and said with his childish wisdom,

"She should be called Dr. Mike, that's easier," he said plainly as he pleaded with his mother to buy the candy for him. It didn't take long before the name Dr. Mike had spread through the town, in fact before Sully had even had the chance to ride out, Hank approached him from the Saloon.

"I hear Dr Mike's doin' better," he said quietly as he looked around the street to make sure no one was watching him. Sully nodded, unable to keep his surprise from showing on his face, at Hanks interest.

Hank nodded his reply as he sauntered back to the saloon. He was never one to let his true feelings show, but inwardly he was happy.

Michaela sat in the rocking chair reading while Hanna sat on a rug on the floor playing with some carved animals her father had made for her. Things had been strained between the two for a while now, and Michaela had no idea of what was wrong. She had tried everything from making Hanna's favourite food, talking about her favourite things, taking walks together, and anything else she could think of. But the little girl was not in the least bit interested, she didn't seem to want anything to do with her. And for Michaela who had instantly taken a liking to her, it was a crushing blow.

In her last attempt Michaela had used the material from one of her own Boston dresses to fit Hanna for the upcoming Christmas dance. She knew she had made some progress when she witnessed the internal struggle in the girls face when she saw it.

Michaela had picked up Hanna from her final day at school telling her that she had a surprise. Hanna had only huffed, saying she didn't need anything, her pa gave her everything she needed. When she discovered what the surprise was she was overwhelmed. The dress was absolutely perfect, and she was delighted at the prospect of looking somewhat like a girl at the dance instead of the usual coveralls she wore. Especially if she could look as good as Michaela did. Many a night she had watched in awe as this beautiful lady brushed out her long hair, or readied herself for the day. But she was holding firm to her belief that she didn't need this woman in her life, no matter what her pa said.

"Are you excited about the dance Hanna?" asked Michaela as she placed the book down in her lap.

"Dances are for girly girls," she frowned, sitting back on her hands to look at Michaela.

"When I was your age, my mother never used to let me go to dances. She always said I was too young," Michaela said in light conversation.

"Really?" The little girl was intrigued. She hadn't ever thought about Michaela as a child. "When did she say you could go?"

"Oh when I was about ten, but by then I wasn't interested in dancing. I just loved to read," she smiled.

"What did ya ma say then?" Hanna asked.

"She told me a young lady always presents herself no matter if she feels in the mood or not. People always expect you to make an appearance," Michaela said in a perfect imitation of her mother's airs.

"Doesn't sound very fun," Hanna said scrunching up her nose.

"Well I didn't think so at the time, but I appreciate all her advice now, and my fathers' too. He was a very smart man," said Michaela quietly, remembering the days gone by.

"Was?"

"Mhmm, my father died not too long ago," Michaela said wistfully.

"Just like my ma," Hanna said thoughtfully. The pair were quiet for a moment until Hanna shrugged her shoulders as if to shake herself from thinking about it and returned to playing with her animals; all the while her young mind turning. Michaela went back to her reading, hoping she had finally succeeded in breaking through the little girls' barrier.

As the clock ticked by, a chill in the air prompted Michaela to stand and place another log onto the fire. She crouched down in front of it and let the warmth infuse her body. Closing her eyes and letting her body relax, she found her thoughts drifting to Sully. She felt, rather than saw a hue of red spread across her cheeks and she smiled as she thought of his smile. She sighed in response as if he were right there with her. When a flash of David's face appeared, it quickly chased away any good feelings she held, and she felt guilt making its way back into her heart.

She slumped onto the floor in front of the fire and held her knees against her chest. Her face looked to the heavens as she felt the moisture run down her cheeks. It often went this way when she thought of Sully; his gentle, kind ways and his caring heart filling her being - only to be clouded with thoughts of betrayal. Why couldn't she let it go? Let David go? Was it too soon to feel normal again, to want to live with a little happiness? She had asked herself these questions more and more recently, but they never seemed to be answered.

As the tears fell slowly and her heart was racked with pain once more, she made a decision; this moment would be different, it had to be. It was time... she breathed deeply in and out, and then in again. Once more the vision of his eyes shone through; his smile, the feel of his hands on her waist as he lifted her down from the wagon. She could smell and feel him all around her, like a blanket of comfort over her tired shoulders. She cared for him, she knew that much, and at this moment she wished he would feel the same. She didn't think it possible, knowing she was only there for his daughter, and for her own welfare, how could he?

She startled out of her thoughts when she felt a gentle tap on her shoulder. She quickly wiped the moisture from her face with the back of her hand as she turned. Hanna stood before her dressed in her Christmas dress as she chewed nervously on her nails. The surprise Michaela felt was fleeting, more so was the feeling of absolute delight. The beautiful rose pink colour of the dress fell delicately to Hanna's ankles and lace framed the collar of her neckline.

"Hanna, you look so beautiful," Michaela whispered as she gently ran her hands the length of the girls arm. Hanna wasn't used to hearing those words about her appearance - except of course from her father, but this was different and she fidgeted awkwardly before replying.

"Thanks." Hanna looked into Michaela's face as the silence echoed through the homestead. A grin rapidly set itself on her features and she giggled and did a little twirl. Michaela was stunned, somehow this dress had become a peace offering between the two, and they both readily accepted it. Michaela beamed and scooped the little girl into her arms, letting out a delighted chuckle, as she spun her around the room.

When they pulled back they were both out of breath from laughter, and any tension that had stood between them had disappeared. The rest of the morning was spent in a 'not too girly' fashion, as Hanna and Michaela laughed about dresses and jewellery, and practiced dancing. Sully couldn't believe his eyes when he walked in and saw his tiny angel in that beautiful dress, dancing around the room with Michaela in hand. How it happened he would never know, but somehow his little girl grew up suddenly.

He was transfixed on the joy that danced around their homestead, and couldn't help but laugh along with them as they crashed into the dining table. Hanna giggled as she raced over grabbing Sully's hands and dragging him across the floor.

"Papa, dance with me," she begged practicing the curtsy Michaela had just shown her. Unable to resist his daughter's request he took off his jacket and laid it over a chair.

"It'd be my pleasure, sweet girl," he laughed and winked at her as he whisked her around the room. She squealed in delight before a child like notion came to her. She wriggled free of her father's arms and skipped over to Michaela, who was standing near the fireplace looking on.

"Dance with papa," she ordered playfully as she led Michaela to Sully. The two adults stood frozen as the little girl took her place on the bed to watch them together.

"Daaaance," she pleaded.

Knowing she would not let this go, and both secretly wanting to they took their positions. Sully's hand sat lightly on Michaela's waist causing her to suck on a nervous breath. Hers rested on his outstretched arm. As their opposite hands joined, the sensation that flooded through him was indescribable and he could feel his heart pounding. He swallowed hard as they began the slow turns around the room. He hadn't danced in years and it showed. He felt clumsy and awkward in her presence and quickly stopped the dance. He pulled his arms back to his side and ran a hand through his hair.

Michaela saw the apprehension in his features; his feelings written so clearly on his face. She wanted to ease his worry, just as he had for her so many time before. She stepped back into his space and lifted his arms back to their positions, as she began to sway more slowly. His heart soared at Michaela's tender actions and he revelled in the sensation of having her in his arms. He knew then as their hands were clasped together that he cared for this woman. He never thought he would feel this way again, but it had snuck up on him, like a predator to its prey.