Chapter 4

He sat there on those stairs for three hours waiting for her to come home when he finally gave up and went and picked up Jack at Dave's. He would have to wait for her to show up in his office in the morning.

The next morning Hotch arrived earlier than usual to the office. He knew Emily was supposed to be there at 7:30 and he wanted to get there before she did. He walked to his office and pulled the files from his brief case, deciding to work on them till she got there.

The next time Hotch looked up it was already 8:00. His heart sank when he realized she wasn't going to come. Putting his head in his hands, he sighed and picked up the stapler and threw it against the wall on the other side of the room.

"Damn it." He said to the empty room.

Hotch looked down at the empty desks in the bullpen before settling on Emily's. His thoughts wondered back to the first time he had met her. He worked for her mother in his early days at the Bureau doing security clearances.

Emily had been home for summer break from Yale and he had found her enchanting even back then. She had stayed away from the house and her mother as much as possible and he understood that. If he could have gotten away from the Ambassador for more than a few minutes he would have. That woman was a cold hearted, selfish snake. He had always wondered how Emily had come out of that life as sweet and kind as she had.

The first time he had seen Emily was at a gala her mother was throwing for some charity she actually cared nothing about. Emily had been hiding in a dark corner of the ballroom trying not to be seen by all the touchy feely horny diplomats' that had attended. He had seen her sneak out the side entrance later that evening and had followed her. He had told himself it was just to make sure she was safe but in reality he knew it was because he was enthralled with her. Her sweet innocence was breathtaking. Her beauty… no one stood a candle to her; even then. But he had Haley waiting for him at home and he was not one to have a meaningless affair; even though he was sure that it would be anything but meaningless.

How could he have forgotten that; forgot how he had felt for her even back then? Maybe his compartmentalization skills could match Emily's on occasions.

'Damn, why did it take me so long to realize? Now it is too late.' He thought as his heart seemed to shatter into a million pieces. He knew she wasn't coming back. He knew he had just missed out on the one thing he had always wanted; whether he realized it or not at the time didn't matter. He had fucked up and he knew it. He was lost in thought and didn't hear the knock on his door.

Dave opened the door and saw the stapler on the floor and the devastated look on his friends face and knew Emily had not shown up.

"Aaron? What the hell are you doing?" Dave said as he walked in.

"She isn't coming Dave. I doubt she will be back. So I am sitting here wallowing in sorrow right now, do you mind? I really would rather do that in private so if you don't mind close the door on your way out." Hotch said as he lowered his head to his desk.

"Aaron stop with the pity party crap and listen to me. She will come back… eventually. She loves you Aaron; I think she always has. I don't get it myself but obviously she does so… Look so you missed the chance today to talk to her; you'll find the right time to say the right thing. Just give it time."

"How the hell can I tell her when I don't know where the hell she is Dave?" Hotch said as he lifted his head to look at his friend.

"You'll figure something out. You always do. Seeing as today is Sunday I am going back home and back to bed; I was just checking on you anyway. I'll see you in the morning." Dave said as he turned to leave.

"Dave… thanks. See you tomorrow."

It had been three months to the day since JJ's wedding. Three months since he had last seen the beauty of Emily Prentiss. Three months since his world had turned upside down.

He knew Emily had kept in contact with the others. She had gone to Comic-Con with Reid, clubbing with Morgan and Garcia, dinner with Dave and had regular girls' night out with JJ and Garcia. He had heard nothing from her; not a hello, goodbye or kiss my ass. Nothing, not a word and the others weren't talking in front of him. He had picked what he knew from tidbits of information he caught in passing. Over hearing the others talking he knew she had transferred to Counter Terrorism and that she had moved to a house in Dupont Circle.

He had to do something. He needed to see her, needed to talk to her. And he knew how he was going to try and attempt to do that. With a little help from a certain technical analyst; he might just achieve his goal.