ZIM SKITZ!!!
CHAPTER 4 "Going Boldly Where No One Asked Us To"
DISCLAIMER: I don't own it!
AUTHOR'S NOTES: If you can guess where this chapter's name came from, you get a cookie!!! Here's a clue: It has something to do with "Space" and "Opera"!!!
There's more SKITZ in this one, but don't get used to it! It just means that there were a lot of SKITZ I could think of with the "Star Trek The Next Generation" crew!!!
I'm also using "(" and ")" instead of ":::" the three colons to denote actions. The sections are divided with the Document Manager's "--------" Line option.
My OCs were in this first SKIT, and so I had to change their names because I don't want to reveal them to the public yet! And, for your information, none of their new names even RESEMBLE what they're supposed to be, so don't even try to guess!\par For their relationships, PIRUNK is ZIM's girlfriend (Irken), DAR-DAR is SKOODGE's girlfriend (also Irken) and HART is GAZ's best buddy (Irken, male, child).
"We've been captured onto a strange, unknown ship! What do we do!?! I know! Let's prank DIB!!!"
(ZIM, PIRUNK, TAK, DIB, SKOODGE, DAR-DAR, GAZ, AND HART are all lying in the Sick-Bay of the Starship Enterprise E. ZIM, PIRUNK, TAK, SKOODGE, DAR-DAR, GAZ, AND HART all stirred respectively from their unconscious slumber. DIB is still unconscious.)
ZIM: (Sits up, rubbing his head and wondering what the heck he's doing lying on his back.) Whaaa- oohhh...what happened???
PIRUNK: (Also sits up.) I feel like I've just been kicked to death, pureeed, and served up in soup!!!
SKOODGE: (He's also sitting up.) Yeah, an' I don't even want to THINK about what happened after that!!!
DAR-DAR: (Doesn't speak. Is still in pain.)
TAK: (She's also sitting up.) Yeahhh...owch! Well, it doesn't look like we're any worse for wear, other than DIB, here.
GAZ: (Has already been up.) Yeah, but the lights are too bright!!!
HART: (Has already been up.) I second that emotion!!! AAARRRGGGEEE!!! I FEEL LIKE I'M BURNING!!!!!!!
GAZ: (Looks over at HART.)
HART: AAARRRGGGEEE!!! HELP ME, GAZ!!! HEEELP MEEE!!!
GAZ: (Kicks HART.)
HART: (Falls off the bed and lands on the floor, now under the shade of the bed.) Thaanks...
GAZ: You're welcome.
HART: (Is happy and has stopped sizzling. Sighs in relief.) Shaaahhh...
GAZ: Humph! They must be those "natural" sun-light lights.
ZIM: Heh, it looks like DIB isn't waking up.
PIRUNK: Man, he could sleep through a BOMB!!!
TAK: Hey! That gives me an idea...!!!
(EVERYONE ELSE gets an EVILE look and grins EVILLY as they all get the same idea.)
RANDOM WHISPERS: Okay! Okay, now! What have we got? Hey, stop pushing! Shush! Hey, you, stop shushing! Hey! Hey, you, I was gonna' use that whipped-cream for something later!!! What are you gonna' use it for- Hey, you! Will you quit doing-wraaaacckkk-k! Hey, you! -you quit that-you're gonna' wake up-well, what do you THINK I'm gonna'-Hey! Will you quit that!?! NOW!!! Ssshhh! Ssshhh! Ssshhh!!!
(EVERYONE shuts up and steps away from their handi-work.)
PIRUNK: Okay! I think it's ready!
TAK: Okay! Where's that feather???
(Everyone looks around.)
TAK: WHAAA-AAAT!?! You didn't bring the FEATHER!?!
GAZ: Don't worry, I got it. (She takes part of her hair and tickles the tip of DIB's nose with it.) Koochie-koochie-coo!!!
DIB: Mmmm! (Wiggles his head around at first, trying to get away from it. Then he sniffs, and he wakes up with a sneeze, sitting up and smacking his hand onto his face. Which is, coincidentally, completely covered in whipped-cream.)
(THE ENTIRE GROUP OF IRKENS AND DIB'S LITTLE SISTER laugh and laugh racously.)
(The Doctor and the main bridge crew have decided, at this moment, to walk into Sick-Bay, and they stare in surprise and somewhat disgust at what's going on here.)
DIB: (Who is sitting up right now, with a face full of whipped-cream.) Growls Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's very funny, you got me.
(The laughter continues on.)
DIB: (Looking down at his hand and wiping some off of his face.) (Sighs.) You know, we should PROBABLY be figuring out where we are, instead of just playing pranks.
(Apparently, this happens a LOT to DIB! Well, I mean, EVERYBODY loves to prank him!!!)
(The laughter from his group just continues on.)
DIB: (Suddenly notices something. The whipped-cream on his hand and head has been smoking for the past couple of seconds, making an audible hissing noise.) Hey, wait a minute-WA-WHA-WRAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGEEEEEEEE!!! (He twitches and convulses around quite satisfyingly.)
(The laughter from the IZ group just gets even louder, as the effects of the Irken whipped-cream burns away at him and sears its way into his flesh.)
DIB: Oh, the pain, the pain!!!
(Doctor Crusher and the rest of the crew are finally snapped out of it, and they rush over to DIB's side to aid him.)
(Dr. Crusher and the rest finally manage to get it all off of him, and they just stand there and stare accusingly at the rest of the IZ group. The rest of the IZ group keeps on laughing, until it's finally laughed out.)
DR. CRUSHER: Just WHAT were you THINKING!?! He could've been KILLED with whatever that stuff was!!!
(This causes even MORE laughter among the IZ group to come up, and even DIB is a little amused by it all.)
PIRUNK: (Laughing) He-He could've been killed with-with WHIPPED-CREAM!!!
TAK: (Laughing) Like that's the WORST thing he's been covered with! And burned in pain!!!
ZIM: (Laughing) I-I liked the KISS OF DEATH!!!
(The laughing continues.)
DIB: (Grinning. He's all burned in the top layers of his skin and he's still smoking, but he's okay!) Yeah, geeze, I've been through worse!
GAZ: Yeah, I've beaten him up!!!
(Even more laughing.)
(The rest of the Enterprise crew continue to look on with confusion.)
(As the laughing dies down.)
WORF: But, you just burned most of his skin off.
DR. CRUSHER: (Examining DIB, with his large head.) Hey, look at this! He's not as frail as most normal humans are!
HART: No, DUH, Membrane!!!
(The other crew members turn to look at Dr. Crusher.)
DR. CRUSHER: A normal human would have suffered 3rd-degree burns, but he has only a 1st-degree burn!!!
"Slumber-Parties Are AWESOME!!!"---(Later on in the previous SKIT.)
(They're still in Sick-Bay. DIB is sitting on the bed.)
GAZ: Oh, you mean like when we took your underwear and froze it when you were the first one to fall asleep?
DIB: (Pointing, Yelling) THAT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO LEAVE THE SLUMBER-PARTY!!!!!!!
(DIB jumps up and runs off, angrily chasing GAZ, as GAZ is very easily eluding him.)
"She's Attracted To The Short, Megalomaniac, Crazy Kind"
(Diana's mom sidles up to ZIM.)
Diana's Mom: (Suggestively) Well, I'm quite impressed with a man who has so much confidence in himself!
ZIM: (Runs off screaming.) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DIB: (Laughs)
Diana's Mom: Oh, don't think YOU'RE off the hook, either! I think maybe...ten years? or so...
DIB: (HORRIFIED LOOK) (Runs off screaming also.) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Diplomatic Negotiations"
CAPTIAN PICARD: We have a few people from your universe here. They insisted that we contact you.
ALMIGHTY TALLEST: Who?
CAPTIAN PICARD: Well, one calls himself "Invader Zim".
ALMIGHTY TALLEST: ... (Suddenly, yelling,) Can you keep him???
CAPTIAN PICARD+CREW: (Surprised looks.)
That's all!!! Thanks for reading! Please R+R! Tell me how I can improve!!! OR DIIIIIEEEEEE!!! Is eating the heads off a chicken...nugget. People who can guess the origin of the chapter's title gets a COOKIE!!! Clue: It has something to do with "Space" and "Opera"!!! ---If you've heard of "KeenSpace" then I've already given it away!!!