Chapter 4: Private Ceremony
Neither Hal nor Phoebe felt the least bit guilty about their choice to elope and avoid the madness and chaos of a large family wedding. Such displays were really anathema to both of them. He liked to keep things simple and she disliked anyone fussing over her. They had only been engaged for a week and already the children were plotting and planning a fairy tale wedding to satisfy their wildest dreams. Trelawney, as usual, was the ringleader. She had been to many large family weddings at home and thus had great expectations. However, if Phoebe had ever at one time shared those feelings, they were long gone.
The months had slipped by since the Figalilly sisters had lost their parents in a car wreck. Each in her own way was still raw. For Phoebe it was impossible for her to think of a wedding without her mother by her side to guide and plan. There would then be the wedding and reception itself. Despite the army of Figalillys who would no doubt be present, the two most special people would not. And no matter who walked her down the aisle it would not be her father.
In fact there had already been tears at the mere thought of the wedding. Being a bride meant far less to her than being a wife. She knew that the family and friends who were looking forward to a big, family blowout would understand her need for the most low key kind of affair possible. Given time, they would realize that this would be their only choice.
Weddings are something akin to buying Christmas gifts for numerous children. There is a constant need to keep things equal. Hal's initial suggestion that they go to one or the other of their two pastors would have left one feeling slighted. A wedding with "just" Emmeline and the kids would have eventually expanded to his parents and brothers. Then as the "even-steven" game began that could easily have escalated into upwards of 200 guests and numerous attendants so that no one would be left out. Then there would be the arrangements for such an extravaganza. The thought made her head spin.
Yet she loved Hal deeply and wanted to be his wife. Thus there would be a marriage ceremony to make all things legal, but no big splashy wedding. Because of his own deep love for her, not to mention his complete understanding of her feelings at the moment, he would risk his mother's wrath and take her to the altar immediately. The fact that she had engineering a set of circumstances that had put him in a position to contemplate and then hastily agree to this course of action had not bothered him as much as she feared it might.
He had confronted her the other night with her choice, not so much to challenge as to clear the air.
"Phoebe," he had said, upon entering the living room. He sat down beside her and gathered her in his arms. "Why?"
She knew what he meant immediately. However, she felt no regrets for any of her choices. Looking him directly in the eye, she replied,
"Because I love you and it is time. I know how much you love me. I knew how much you wanted me, at the very least as much as I wanted you. But, Hal darling, you know how you get so caught up in just keeping up with the details of life that you lose sight of the big picture. I did not want to entrap you, just move you along in the right direction, so to speak."
Hal looked at her thoughtfully, "Didn't you trust me?"
"I absolutely trusted you then and trust you now," she answered, in a most definitive tone. "I have trusted you since the first moment you took me in arms that afternoon that I thought my heart would break, listening to Prudence and Trelawney talk about how much they each loved me. I have entrusted you with my heart and soul, not to mention my body, for the rest of my life. Any lack of trust I had, was about your ability to get started with the process, so to speak."
He continued to gaze into her eyes thoughtfully. Her blue eyes were guileless, as trusting as a child's. They looked back into with an openness bordering on vulnerable. He knew that she looked at no one else in the world like that, not even her sister, who was as close to her in heart and soul as anyone, with the exception of him, could be. He gently kissed her forehead, smoothed back her hair, and settled her on his shoulder.
"You were right," he said at length. "On Saturday morning, after you left me and I knew that I had to move quickly, my mind began to think a mile a minute. I knew what kind of engagement ring I wanted. I just had to make up my mind as to the final choice. I knew how I wanted to ask you, that was the easy part. To be quite honest, I didn't want to wait to marry you, but, as you have said in not so many words, I was putting other people first. You asked me to put you first and I suppose that that is what gave me the wherewithal to plan the elopement."
"Once I knew that you wanted to marry as quickly as possible," he continued. "The rest just fell into place. I knew about the Episcopal chapel because I had noticed on our way up to the state park when we were driving out on our first date . I remembered it because you said that it looked so sweet sitting out in the hills like that. The bed and breakfast was sheer coincidence, as was the pastor's willingness to marry us on short notice. It all worked at perfectly."
She looked up at him and smiled.
"So you put me first?" she asked.
"Yes," he said firmly. "And I learned a valuable lesson. You are sweet and kind and patient, but that doesn't mean that I may forget that you have first place in my heart and in my life's plans. If I had been paying close enough attention then I would have seen that you were ready to move forward and asked you to marry me before you were forced to . . . uh . . . point it out to me."
He took a moment to reflect on his next words.
"I in no way regret that I discovered the beauty of all of you last weekend," he said tenderly. "I regret that it was because of my neglect, my lack of observation, that you felt that you had to act as you did."
"I have no regrets at all," she said simply. "I love you. I wasn't looking to merely enter the next phase of our physical relationship. I wanted to be your wife. What I did, I did for love."
"I know that," he said softly. "Everything you do, you do for love. I consider myself blessed to be the recipient of all that love. I may not be worthy, but I am the recipient."
She laughed. "Hal, as usual, you have become so caught up in the details, you have lost sight of the big picture. No man has ever shown such great love and devotion to a woman, as you. You had faith in our love, when I lost it. You carried me through the darkest days of my life. You are my shining light in the darkness."
He looked into her blue eyes and knew that she spoke the truth.
"The gallant knight has fought many battles for his fair maiden and won her hand," she said, borrowing Trelawney's favorite metaphor. But seeing how serious he had become, she added playfully,
"Of course the fair maiden is now a fallen woman."
"Phoebe," he began to object.
"She has fallen in love with her gallant knight," she finished, and initiated a passionate kiss.
When he caught his breath, he replied, "She has fallen into my arms, and there she will rest by my side forever more."
Phoebe nestled in more closely and he tightened his grip. For the moment, they needed no further physical demonstration of their love. There is more to intimacy than physical passion.
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So Saturday morning, after the kids went out with Phoebe's Cousin Emmeline for an outing, they packed a couple of overnight bags and hopped in the car. The drive up to the hills was perfect. The sky was clear and temperature mild. Phoebe's car Arabella was very cooperative and they had a smooth ride. At one point, Hal stopped the car and they both got out.
"Do you remember this spot?" he asked.
"Yes," she said softly. "This is where you took me to look out on the edge of forever."
"I hoped that you would remember," he said. "I believe that we are once again about to look beyond the boundaries of our daily lives, and look into the immense expanse of the universe."
When they arrived at the Hill Top Bed and Breakfast, Hal asked if they could register was Professor and Mrs. Harold Everett. The innkeeper, Julian Hawthorne, was surprised.
"Aren't you Professor and Mrs. Everett?"
"Not for a couple of more hours," replied Hal as he looked at Phoebe. She simply gazed back speechless. It had given her a thrill to hear their names linked that way.
The Julian looked at them and smiled back, "I think that I can trust you to come back with everything legal. Although I do admit that we have our share of couples who register as married, but are not interested in making things permanent, shall we say."
"This is permanent already," said Hal smiling. "We're just up here to make things official."
They followed him as he led him up to their room. Like all bed and breakfasts, it was a large rambling house. He was a writer and his wife was a painter. A few years ago they had grown tired of the hustle and bustle of city life. They bought the old house for a song and renovated themselves. Now they had plenty of time to write and paint to their hearts' content, while playing innkeepers to support themselves.
Phoebe enjoyed looking around at the southwestern-themed decor. She had never been in a bed and breakfast like this before. It had all the homely charm of the ones that she had been in Europe. Like those, this fit into the surrounding landscaped perfectly. Noticing her interest, Julian gave her a little background.
"Maddie and I are originally from New England," he explained. "In fact she's from Concord, Massachusetts. We met up at Berkeley. Our plan had always been to go back east, but she fell in love with the Southwest for its color. I have to admit, I fell in love with the climate. Plan A, as we call it now, had been to open a B&B in Concord and decorate it along the theme of the local authors, Thoreau, Emerson, Alcott, etc. We adapted our idea as Plan B, for this place."
"It is a wonderful idea," commented Phoebe.
"We basically gutted the original structure, opening up the ceilings so we could put in the beams, and of course the skylights," he continued. "Most of the artwork that you see round the walls is Maddie's. We have the upper and lower rooms of course, but my favorite feature is this great room in the middle, which opens to both floors.
"The original thought behind opening up the ceilings was to provide natural lighting for her paintings. This area doubles as gallery space for her work. If you come back in six months, you will see all new paintings, since she actually sells from here. The southwestern artifacts are what I have collected over the years. The furnishings in the rooms are mostly antiques, although I can promise that the bathrooms and the mattresses are all modern."
Phoebe and Hal looked around curiously, especially Phoebe. This was one area of America, and in fact the world that was new to her. The space seemed to glow with golden light. The warm colors of the rugs and tapestries and the bearskins and other hides gave the honey colored wood floors and woodwork everywhere a bright and cheerful feeling. They followed Julian up the stairs and walked around the overhang so that they could look down over the great room.
He turned to Phoebe. "Hal has reserved a second floor room, which means that it has a skylight of its own."
The room was tastefully decorated, obviously by his wife. There was a fireplace, where the logs had been placed, ready to be lit. The four-poster bed stood high off the floor and was covered by a handmade quilt. On the low table by the fireplace stood a vase with a dozen white roses. Hal handed Phoebe the small envelop. The card inside read,
"To my beautiful wife on our wedding day. Love forever, Hal"
Phoebe's eyes glistened with tears. There would be no bouquet to throw or large arrangements at the church or centerpieces for the tables. She didn't need any of that. Instead, she had these beautiful flowers from her new husband. Roses were her favorite and she knew that he had chosen white for a bride. She would bring them home and press them to have forever.
Seeing that they wanted to be alone Julian said, "Tomorrow morning you will come down for breakfast in the great room. There are three other couples here, so you will all eat around the big table. Maddie and I cook and serve breakfast, but we also like to spend to with our guests. This is an adult only inn, simply because we prefer to keep things quiet and low key. As you can guess, it is impossible to maintain that atmosphere with kids running around."
"Indeed, we well know that," grimaced Hal. "It was what sold me on the place."
"Well, I am glad that it did. Now I will leave you alone. Let me know if you need anything. I'll just be downstairs waiting for our other guests to arrive. You are the first," answered Julian and then left them alone.
Hal had carried in their bags and Phoebe still had the box with her dress. She decided to wait until she got to the church to put it on. He was looking forward to seeing it again. There was so much upset and confusion that he scarcely remembered what it looked like when she had last tried it on. She was pleased when he told her.
"Then when you see me at the church it will be like the first time," she said a little happily, but also a little sadly.
Hal knew what she was thinking and took her in his arms. "I know they will see you. I know they'll be there."
He let her cry. He knew she needed to release some of the sadness that he had sensed building over the last week. He also knew well that a large part of the motivation for the elopement was to avoid a big family event where her parents' absence would have been more keenly felt. It had not even been a year since they had passed and she was taking one of the biggest of life's steps without them. He hoped that they weren't rushing things. And he hoped that he wasn't trying to push her into something that she wasn't ready for.
"Phoebe, if you're not ready for this, if you want to wait, we can just make this a long weekend away for the two of us," he said.
She looked back at him with love. She knew once again how well he knew her. He understood all of her feelings and mixed emotions about the day. But it only made her all the more certain that when they returned to this room later tonight that she would be his wife. Looking in her eyes he once again, without words, understood. He kissed her tenderly and held her close. As she safely rested in his arms she wondered that despite their vast differences he could know her so well. But the uncomplicated, unconditional nature of his love for her cut through many of the shadows and nuances that can cloud human relationships. She knew that this was the only man that she could have ever possibly married.
When they arrived at the church the pastor and his wife met them. The pastor took Hal outside to talk while Mrs. Dugan, the pastor's wife brought Phoebe to the guest room in the rectory where she could change. A kindly woman by nature, she had helped many brides prepare for their weddings. She had never met one who was not in some way affected by doubts. Phoebe was no exception. Although her practiced eye told her this was a bride-to-be deeply in love with her future husband, there was still a latent anxiety and a touch of sadness.
To put her at ease, she helped her to open the box with the lovely old-fashioned wedding dress. It had to be at least one hundred years old and had been beautifully preserved. They laid the dress out on the bed and pulled out the veil. Although the tulle was a little flat, it sprang back to life when freed from its constraints.
"This is exquisite," she said. "Simple and elegant, yet rich in detail. It puts the modern dresses of today to shame."
The young woman before her looked at it with yearning, "It was my great-great-grandmother's. All the women in my family have worn it."
Mrs. Dugan looked at her searchingly. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"About what?"
"Why a beautiful bride like yourself, who is so in love with her husband-to-be, is feeling sad," Mrs. Dugan didn't waste words. She wasn't trying to pry, but as a pastor's wife she had a natural desire to reach out to those who were in need.
The young woman before her with the lovely blonde hair and deep blue eyes had certain fragility about her. Her presence projected control and self-assurance. Her voice had a low, very sweet tonal quality. Her aura glowed, but did not radiate. Most telling was her smile, soft but sad.
She knew that within minutes Phoebe, what a lovely name, would be committing herself to the handsome, dark-haired man outside having a conversation with her husband. From what little she had seen of him, he was deeply in love with her and had no doubts. His manner with her was gentle. Whatever the root of the air of sadness she projected, he clearly knew it and was determined to be her strength.
"I don't want to feel sad," replied Phoebe, "But at this moment I am missing my parents very much."
"When did you lose them?" she asked gently.
"About ten months ago," she replied.
"Oh," replied Mrs. Dugan. "That's not very long ago at all. Is that why you're eloping?"
"How did you guess?" asked Phoebe.
"It wasn't really a guess. I knew that it was something along those lines," she admitted.
"Most women want their wedding to be the biggest event of their lives. Some elope because they have to. Some elope because their families disapprove. But a small number are trying to avoid what would otherwise be a very painful day," she said wisely. "I knew from the moment I saw you that the first two didn't apply. And nobody elopes with an heirloom like this dress unless someone very special is missing."
Phoebe was silent. She didn't like it when others could read her so well. Hal was the exception. What they had was unique. Mrs. Dugan sensed her reluctance to admit that she was right. But she knew she had to ask the question. Phoebe answered before she could ask.
"Yes," she said firmly. "I am sure that this is right. No matter how long I wait, they won't be here. Hal and I live together, although presently not as husband and wife. I have been nanny to his children for almost two years now. There are four children at home who need the stability of two parents. But we are not getting married for them. It is time. We love each other. We know that we want to spend the rest of our lives together. There is nothing stopping us anymore."
Mrs. Dugan was mildly surprised by her very definitive answer. But Phoebe clearly knew her own mind and was stronger than she had first appeared. Despite her obvious youth, she seemed much older and to have lived many more years than a young woman in her twenties. Perhaps it was because of her suffering, that she had acquired a deeper wisdom than her youthful looks belied. It was her present sadness that added to frailty. She smiled.
"Come on, let me see how beautiful you look in this dress. But under the circumstances, I would hardly consider this an elopement. I think that you have every right to consider it a private ceremony."
Outside the Professor walked along with Pastor Dugan, who could see that he was having those last minute pre-wedding jitters. He was restlessly moving. While there seemed to be absolutely no doubts in his mind that he was taking the correct course, his anxiety for his bride was apparent. It did not take much encouragement to get him talking.
"She's a beauty and not just physically. She is the sweetest and kindest woman I have ever met. It still amazes me that she even looked twice at me," said Hal.
"Why is that?"
"She came into my home almost two years ago as my children's nanny. I still don't know what we would have done without her. Everything that had been wrong after my wife died was suddenly set right, and not just the house. She helped us become a family again. Almost a year ago she lost her own parents and we thought we were going to lose her. She has a younger sister she has to raise. But I offered my home to the child so she could stay. She's like a sister to my daughter and I have come to love her like a daughter myself.
"For a time we thought that we might lose Phoebe anyway, she had a previous commitment. But you can't stop true love. We're here because she couldn't face a family wedding without her folks. I really don't need all that, I just need her," explained Hal.
Pastor Dugan looked at him. This was a man in love. It was obvious that he would love and cherish the woman he was to marry. Seeing that Professor Everett still had some thoughts in his mind he encouraged him to talk.
"Oh these women! Even when eloping and there's no one present but their intended they still need time to primp and fuss to look their best. Even a woman as beautiful as your Phoebe."
Hal smiled. He liked the way that Pastor Dugan had referred to her as "his Phoebe." He often thought of her that way even though he had made a great deal of not viewing her as a possession.
"I really can't picture a life apart from her any more. We just belong together. We also need to be settled. I need to be free to care for her whenever she needs me. Right now that's impossible with four children in the house and no ability to get away by ourselves without raising questions."
Pastor Dugan smiled. "There are times when you may find it just as difficult to be alone after you are married. Remember that they're a part of the formula too. You will have to be careful to establish boundaries right away, or you may find them underfoot even more than they are now."
"Well, I doubt that's possible, but I see what you mean. However, today is just about the two of us and I want to make the most of it. What do you think is taking her so long?"
"You tell me. You've been married before," as he inclined his head towards the church.
Hal looked over and saw Mrs. Dugan coming toward them.
"She's ready," she said more to her husband than the Professor.
Pastor Dugan did not like marrying couples that he didn't personally know, especially on what might seem like a whim. But he didn't want to say no either, knowing that sooner or later they would find someone to marry them anyway. So it was his practice to speak to the groom, while his wife talked to the bride. If they discovered that it might not work in the long run, they would suggest they put it off. He could see there was no need in this case.
"You'll meet your bride at the back of the church and then walk her down the aisle to me at the altar," he explained. "They never admit it, but every bride wants to walk down the aisle, even if she's eloping."
Mrs. Dugan smiled at him, "I really would not consider this eloping. I think that Phoebe and Hal should say that they have chosen to have a private ceremony, in light of her parents' recent passing."
"Did you tell Phoebe that?" asked Hal.
"Yes, I did," she replied. "I believe that she liked the idea very much."
Hal smiled. He knew that she would. Once again, his out of town plans had turned out as perfectly as he hoped. It must have been fate that brought them to Pastor Dugan's church. He and his wife seemed to understand them, well, perfectly.
The Dugans went around the back of the chapel so that they would be waiting at the altar. From the time Hal entered the church, all he could see was Phoebe, waiting for him, her blue eyes filled with joy. He felt a rush of happiness as he approached her and held out his arm. With a smile she took it and they walked together towards the future. As she took his arm, she could almost feel his strength flowing through her veins and holding up her heart.
The afternoon sunlight was streaming through the windows and casting a golden glow. It was so bright, that there was no need for artificial light. Through an upper window, she could see a shaft of light that was falling on the front pew. She suddenly sensed her parents' presence. As they passed by, she realized that Hal must have felt it too. He looked at the exact spot and gently squeezed her arm. His smile was tender and knowing, and he gave the most barely perceptible nod. Her heart was so full that she wondered how she would say her vows.
The ceremony was as simple as she had wished: an exchange of vows and an exchange of rings. It thrilled her heart as she placed the simple gold band on his hand. She thought her heart would stop as she felt him slide the gold band on her own finger. She was so moved that he had to take the engagement ring from her other hand and slide it on in front of the band. Her own trembling hands would not allow her to do so.
Her tears started to flow as Pastor Dugan pronounced the final words. They were now man and wife, for as long as they both should live. As if in a dream, she felt Hal draw her forward and tenderly kiss her. Then he pulled her closer in an embrace and whispered directly into her ear, "Forever."
Both Pastor and Mrs. Dugan were equally moved. On very rare occasions, when only the most emotionally connected couples were married, did the room seem to hum with an inexplicable energy. Being devout believers, they had come to see this as God placing his own special blessing on the newly married couple. It was present now, although the couple before them was oblivious. They were so entirely focused on one another that the rest of the world had fallen away.
Pastor Dugan considered their choice to elope, or better put, opt for a private ceremony. It was clearly the right one. If they had been married in a large ceremony, surrounded by many others and with worries of a huge reception to follow, the intensity of the moment would have been lost. It would not have made the marriage any less strong, but it would have robbed them of this opportunity to share this enormous passage in their lives on such a deep level. For indeed at the end of this passage they would emerge. No longer two individuals, but as one. This was a match clearly made in heaven and was now sanctified by God.
Hal felt the shift deep within his soul and one look into Phoebe's eyes told him that she was experiencing the same thing. Her tremulous smile said more than words. Fortunately, he had the presence of mind to make sure that the paperwork was complete and the Pastor paid. Phoebe had wished to get out of the dress before they left, so that it could be safely packed away for Trelawney and Prudence some day, and any other daughters that they might have. However, Mrs. Dugan talked her out of it.
"You look so lovely. With the open car, perhaps a few people will get to see you. As long as you have it on, you might as well enjoy it," she urged. "Besides, I think that your husband will like seeing you in it for a little longer."
Phoebe blushed a little thinking that no doubt Hal would much prefer seeing her out of it than in it. She of course could not mention that so obediently she packed up her street clothes and met Hal and Pastor Dugan outside.
"It's a pity that you won't have a picture of Phoebe in that lovely wedding dress," said Mrs. Dugan.
"I suppose that we could have one taken at a professional studio," said the Professor. "What do you think, Phoebe?"
"I think that would be a nice idea. It would be nice to have a picture to send home to the family. We can dress the kids up and have family portrait taken at the same time," she answered.
"Is there ever a time when you're not thinking of the kids?"
She smiled sweetly and said, "I'm about to put them out of my mind."
"Is that a promise?" he asked playfully.
She just gave him one of her alluring smiles. The Dugans walked them to the car and bid farewell. One of the difficulties with these elopements was that they would become so close to a couple for a brief hour or so and then they went off forever.
As they watched the Everetts drive off, he turned to her and said, "This one is going to last."
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When they returned to the Hill Top Bed and Breakfast, they were greeted by Julian, with his wife Madeline, "May we be the first to congratulate the new Professor and Mrs. Harold Everett?"
"Absolutely, my friends," asked Hal.
Madeline, or Maddie, was admiring Phoebe and the dress. Looking at her she said, "Have you ever had your portrait painted?"
"Why no," replied Phoebe, she was beginning to feel self-conscious at the woman's obvious scrutiny.
"I'm surprised," she said. I would have thought that by now some artist would have convinced you to sit for him or her."
"Why is that?" she asked curiously.
"Of course you must realize that your beauty is exquisite," she answered. "Your classical features, blue eyes, and golden hair are an artist's dream. You are wearing almost no make up. And dressed in that simple, old-fashioned gown, you look gorgeous. There's no way that a photograph could capture your timeless beauty. If you were staying longer, I would want to paint you myself. My specialty is landscapes, but I think I could capture your image effectively."
By the time she was done speaking, Phoebe's complexion had turned a deep red. It wasn't just the compliments that embarrassed her. It was the blatant analysis of her looks. Hal had been looking at her with admiration since he had first seen her in the dress. She knew that he was proud of her, but Maddie's lavish compliments clearly put his thoughts into words.
Julian could see that Phoebe was uncomfortable and ever the perfect host said,
"I apologize for my wife's forwardness. I am afraid that the artist sometimes emerges ahead of the innkeeper. She does not mean to intrude."
"Of course I don't ," Maddie quickly added. "I am afraid that I sometimes speak before I think."
"We have a little girl at home who does exactly the same thing, don't we Phoebe?" said Hal to break the slight tension in the air.
Turning to Julian he asked, "Is everything ready?"
"Ready and waiting!" replied his host, grateful to be out of what he considered to be a tight spot. He would have to have a word with Maddie about her lack of tact.
Phoebe turned to him, "Is what ready?"
"Come along Mrs. Everett and see," said Hal with that boyish grin that he always had when he had planned a surprise.
She glowed and followed him to their room where there was a bottle of champagne on ice and a platter with fruit, cheese and crackers. There was another platter with whole grain bread, vegetables and meat. Hal knew that they were not going to be very hungry, but he also do not want to have to leave the room for anything once they were in.
After he opened the door he surprised her by picking her up and carrying her in. Gently he laid her on the bed and sat down beside her. She looked up at him. She was too moved to speak. Thinking quickly he said,
"I'll carry you over the threshold when we get home tomorrow too. The kids will get a kick out of it."
"Are you sure that they'll let us in the door after we foiled their plot?" she said trying to match his cheerful tone.
"Oh they'll let us in," he replied. "Once they find out, Hal and Trelawney's brains will no doubt go into overdrive thinking up schemes for revenge."
With a glint in her eye she said, "Well if they want to lock us up somewhere together, I won't object."
Seeing her intent, Hal decided that the time for talk was over. It was time make love to his new wife. Taking her in his arms, he prepared to take the final steps towards joining them for life. Carefully he helped her remove her wedding attire. It was almost like unwrapping a beautifully wrapped package, as the layers slowly came off. He helped her to set them in a safe place, but told her to leave packing them away for later.
He once again picked her up and kissed her gently and then with increasing passion. He tenderly lay her down on the bed. As he removed his own clothes, she looked directly up and said, "Hal!"
He knew what she had seen. It was the reason he had wanted a second floor bedroom. Above the bed was a skylight. Presently, the sun was shiny through, bathing her in a golden light, but later they would be able to sleep beneath the stars. She looked at him and smiled that smile that was his and his alone. It was time to make love to his new wife.
Making love in full daylight was a different experience from the shadows of the night. Phoebe's fair white skin made a delicate contrast to his own, still tanned from the summer months. Unbound, her silky golden hair always felt longer and fuller than when she tied it back. As he fell on her, he felt her arms wrapped around him.
"I've missed you," he said. And he had. They had not been together like this in a whole week, yet it felt like a lifetime. There was a wonder in the rediscovery of one another. There was also the hunger of one who had fasted, or in this case abstained. It was a hunger that could only be satisfied by the other. If they could help it, they would never be separated for so long again. It was as if she was welcoming him after a long separation. He abandoned himself to the pleasure of her and when he was done, fell on her.
He rested with his head on her shoulder. She cradled him and ran her fingers through his hair. He feel her heart pounding below his cheek, and of course his own was racing after the exertion. They were at rest. When their bodies had returned to normal, she said, "Hal?"
"Hmmm," he answered.
"That felt different," she said in wonder.
"I'll say," he answered smiling.
"No," she said seriously. "That felt different in another way."
"Can you explain it?" he asked.
She wasn't sure that she could. This was a reunion with a past lover. This lover had not only shared her body, but had left his seed. She had born his child before. Her womb remembered, even if she did not. The desperate aching that she had felt, when she thought that he had been lost to her forever now made sense. His ability to know her mind made sense.
Hal was indeed her other half, a past lover, perhaps not husband, but certainly lover, with whom she had shared that most intimate of the male-female human experience. She would treasure each blessing God sent them. She would nurture each child within her very being, close to her heart. When the moment was right, she would give birth and present her husband with the fruit of their love. The temporary fear that she would not be able to conceive fell away. She knew that it was only a matter of time. It was an awesome responsibility. But the creation of all life was a responsibility. But they were ready.
Right now he was watching her closely, trying to discern her thoughts before she spoke them. Yet sadly he could not. And he could not discern what he did not understand. However, to her it made no difference. What they shared was unique and theirs alone.
"No," she said reluctantly, "I cannot explain it."
Or if I did, she thought, you would never believe it.
To be continued . . .