Disclaimer: I do not own Ao no Exorcist/Blue Exorcist or anything recognizable.

Hello, sorry for the late update. I've had terrible writers block with all of my stories. This chapter took a full month to write. This story is drawing to a close. There will be 2 or 3 more chapters.

Yukio ended the call and put his phone into one of his coat pockets. Bon would be over shortly and he was bringing Shima with him. If Yukio was going to watch over Rin, he was going to need some help. Walking back into their room, Yukio made sure that he shut the door behind him. Rin had barely moved an inch. He was still sitting on his bed, staring blankly at the ground.

Yukio badly wanted to know what was going through his mind. He would ask, but decided not to. With Rin's mood swings, there was a chance that it could make things worse. It might upset Rin further. At least for now, he would have to deal with the situation from a medical point of view.

"Have you experienced any loss of consciousness or noticed any gaps in your memory?" Yukio questioned.

Rin stared at the floor boards, refusing to meet Yukio's eyes. He shrugged and replied, "Yeah."

"How often?"

"I dunno... Not too often. It's happened a couple of times."

"I'm not angry with you," Yukio reassured in a calm voice, "I just wish you had come to me instead."

Yukio pulled Rin into a bone-crushing hug and said, "We're brothers. We're supposed to help each other."

"'m sorry." Rin mumbled into Yukio's chest.

"I know."

They stayed that way for a while, each finding comfort in the other's presence. When Yukio broke away, he checked the time on his watch. Bon and Shima should be over at any minute now. Over the phone, Yukio instructed Bon to tell Shima of the current situation and no one else. The two of them could handle themselves, but Yukio couldn't risk Rin somehow harming or injuring Izumo or Shiemi, and least of all Koneko, who was still cautious and fearful of Rin.

"I was just on the phone with Bon," Yukio explained. It was better that Rin had some time to prepare, "He is coming over here with Shima. I assumed that you didn't want too many people to see you while you're in this state."

"In this state?" Rin repeated in a hostile voice, "There's nothing wrong with me."

The alarm bells went off in Yukio's head, he didn't mean for anything he said to be provocative. Was Rin having another mood swing? Mood swings were a common side effect of withdrawal after all.

"That's not what I meant Rin-"

"Of course not. Of course you didn't mean anything by it, you're Mr. Perfect and nothing you can do or say is wrong, right? I'm just your piece of shit, flunky brother who fucks up everything, aren't I?!" Rin screamed at him hysterically.

Yukio put his hands up and made a 'calm down' gesture, "I've never said that."

"Oh but you didn't have to say it, you thought it, didn't you? Didn't you?!" Rin shouted again, "You know what? I'm outta here."

Rin tried to push his way past Yukio and leave, but Yukio blocked his path. If he let Rin leave in this state, who knows what could happen to him. What if he got hurt, or ended up in a bad situation?

"Let. Me. Go." Rin demanded in a dangerous voice. Who the hell did Yukio think he was, his jailer? Yukio wasn't his guardian, let alone his fucking father!

A wave of emotion crashed over Rin when he thought about his father. What would Shiro think of him now? Rin promised that he would show Shiro just how much of an adult he was, and here he was now. Acting like a child. Before he could stop himself, fresh tears were pouring down his face. He tried to wipe them off with his sleeve but found that they didn't stop falling. Rin slowly crumpled down to the floor and started to cry.

Yukio watched helplessly as his brother turned from furious and angry, to sad and emotional in less than a minute. Yukio apprehensively knelt down by Rin's side. This was going to be a really long night. Rin leaned against him and cried even harder. Yukio's heart broke. His brother was in distress and there wasn't much that Yukio could do to fix it.

Yukio sat there and let Rin cry on his shoulder until he heard a voice downstairs call out, "Hey! Yukio, we're here."

"I'm going to go downstairs and go talk to them, will you be okay for a moment?" Yukios asked Rin.

Rin wiped his eyes and nodded, his throat hurt from crying and yelling so much .

Yukio ran down the stairs to the first floor as quickly as he's legs would take him. He wasn't one hundred percent sure about how the others could help him quite yet, but having two extra pairs of eyes on Rin would be a good start. The mood swings were a sign that withdrawals were going to be starting soon and when the full withdrawals came around, they were going to be in a world of trouble.

Yukio nearly ran headfirst into Bon and Shima.

"Thank you guys for coming on such short notice." Yukio huffed, catching his breath.

"It's no problem at all." Bon said sincerely, looking around curiously to see if Rin was nearby.

"Yeah, what he said." Shima agreed.

"He's upstairs right now," Yukio said, following Bons curious gaze, "I think he's starting to go into withdrawl. I can't risk leaving him alone for too long, he's a danger to himself. If you'll follow me..."

Yukio led them upstairs to his and Rin's room.

"Rin, they're here..." Yukio's voice trailed off. The room was empty. His pulse quickened, Rin wasn't there. Where could Rin have gone? He had only been left alone for a second!

"He's gone." Yukios said in a panicked voice, "We should split up and search the building. He can't have gone far..."

Just then, they heard the sound of footsteps nearby. The bathroom! He must have gone there, it was the only thing that made sense.

Yukio knocked on the door and asked, "Rin, are you in there?"

He waited for a reply but when none came, he tried to open the door. The door was locked from the inside. He put a little more force against the door and tried again, but it just wouldn't budge. He tried knocking on the door, hoping for a reply this time.

"Go away!" A voice shouted angrily from the inside of the bathroom.

Yukio gripped his chest in relief, Rin was in there. He hadn't left the building.

"Rin, please open the door." Yukio pleaded.

"I said go away!" This time when he yelled, there was a loud clatter and a hiss of pain that followed.

"What is he doing?" Bon asked, confused. He too had heard the hiss of pain through the door.

"What are you doing in there?" Yukio asked.

There was a weird crunching sound followed by yet another hiss of pain.

"Why would you care?" Rin challenged, "What I do is none of your business. I can do anything I want and you can't do anything about it."

"You... You don't think he's hurting himself do you?" Shima asked the others quietly.

They all exchanged a worried look. What if Rin was hurting himself? There was no way they could get inside. Unless...

"Move, I'm breaking down the door." Bon declared. He had enough of waiting. If his friend was in pain, they needed to get in there.

"Rin," Bon warned, "you can either open the door before I'm done counting down, or I will break it down. Do you understand? Three... Two... One..."

Bon drew himself back, giving himself room to kick down the door. Right before he kicked it open, they heard the lock click and the door opened slowly.

"Hi..." Rin greeted in a meek voice, "I accidentally knocked over a glass..."

"Man, you really do look terrible." Shima said bluntly, taking in Rin's appearance.

Bon gave Shima a sharp look. Now was not really the time for those types of comments.

"I thought you said I looked fine." Rin said to Yukio weakly.

"No, I said you don't look as bad as the typical drug user." Yukio said, "Come here."

Yukio looked Rin over. He didn't seem to have hurt himself intentionally. Rin had obviously tried to pick up the glass he knocked over because he had razor-thin cuts on his fingers but his body had already begun to heal itself.

"I'll pick up the glass. Bon, help me?" Yukio asked.

Bon agreed. He and Yukio would have to figure out a schedule to keep an eye on Rin at all times. It wasn't safe to leave him all by himself.

Rin left the bathroom and Shima followed closely behind him. Rin sat down on his bed and pulled his knees to his chest. How was it that he always made things harder for everyone else? It always seemed like Yukio was picking up after him. Figuratively and literally.

Shima plopped down on the floor next to Rin's bed in a huff. He looked around the room and found a pile of Rin's homework.

He looked through some of it before asking, "So what's goin' on here?"

"Not much." Rin answered shortly.

"Hmm," Shima hummed distractedly, "I didn't mean what's going on with you, I meant this essay. I might not be the smartest person around, but I'm pretty sure you spelt 'continuously' wrong..."

Shima babbled on a little while, talking about nonsensical things. He figured that talking to Rin about other things aside from his current condition might put him in a better mood or maybe help him open up a bit but no matter what he said, Rin refused to look at him.

Shima sighed and finally asked, "Why won't you look at me?"

"I just... I just don't understand why you guys are here. We haven't spoken in weeks and when I went to lunch, you guys looked at me like I didn't belong there."

Shima looked at Rin in bewilderment, "Didn't belong there? Hell, that's not what anyone was thinking at all. We've all wanted to talk to you, but none of us were sure how. You look really sick Rin. Like really, really sick. We're all worried about you."

"Then why were you guys talking about me behind my back at lunch?"

"We weren't!" Shima insisted, "Well, we were, but not like you think. We were talking about how sick and exhausted you seem."

After what felt like ages, Shima was able to get Rin to open up and talk a little more but still not as much as he would have liked. It was going to take a lot more than small talk to get Rin to open up and talk to him. Bon and Yukio were still deep in discussion.

"It's getting really late, why don't you get some shuteye before they make their way over here and nag at us?" Shima suggested to Rin, pointing in Bon and Yukio's direction.

Rin agreed and laid out on his bed. Within moments, the the dark nothingness of sleep consumed him.

-~x~-

Rin woke up not two hours later in a cold sweat. He was trembling and his heart was pulsating loudly in his head. His muscles were aching again. To top it all off, he felt like he was going to be sick. It took Rin a moment to come to his surroundings but when he did, he noticed that he wasn't alone in his room.

The three other occupants of the room had all nodded off and fallen asleep at some point. Yukio was sleeping in his usual bed, his chest rising and falling ever so gently.

Bon was fast asleep on the floor by Yukio's bed, he didn't look comfortable in his sleep, laying face first into a pillow, but who was Rin to judge weird sleeping habits?

He heard the floor by the foot of his bed creak and assumed that's where Shima slumbered on.

Rin slipped out of his bed and tip-toed around the room quietly. His entire body ached like he needed something, and he needed it now. He looked through his dresser, checked the pockets of his clothes and found nothing. It looked like someone had recently cleaned his entire room.

Careful to avoid stepping on Shima, he checked under his pillows and found nothing. His mind was racing, what was he missing?!

He went into the bathroom and flicked the light on, being extra careful to not make any sounds on the tiled floor.

"What are you doing?"

Rin jumped, the voice spooking him from his thoughts. He whipped around to face the person. It was Yukio. 'Why was it always Yukio?' Rin thought dismally. Rin's eyes flicked around the room, looking for an excuse, "I couldn't sleep so I decided to go for a walk."

Yukio looked around the room and raised an eyebrow, "Around the bathroom?"

"Yeah... Why are you awake?" Rin asked, hoping to remove himself from the spotlight.

In the bedroom, Bon woke up and yawned loudly. The sound of voices had woken him up. Seeing the bathroom light on he got up and walked over to it. Inside the bathroom, Yukio wasleaning against the door frame and Rin was standing like a deer in headlights. Rin looked shaky and unbalanced and Yukio looked unamused.

"'mething wrong?" Bon asked in a tired voice.

"Apparently Rin is going for a walk... In the bathroom." Yukio said, sharing a knowing look with Bon.

Bon looked at his watch, it was early in the morning but it was just late enough for them to stay awake if needed, "Rin, do you think you could fall back asleep tonight?" Bon asked.

Rin contemplated it for a moment but ultimately shook his head no. He was too awake, too jittery. He knew that he needed to sleep and that rest would be the best thing for him now, but he just couldn't shake that feeling. His entire body ached for drugs.

Bon sighed and resigned himself to the fact that they wouldn't be getting much sleep tonight. Bon wasn't upset, he just knew that Rin would benefit from the rest, "Alright, I'm going to get some water. I'll be right back."

Bon left the room to get himself a glass of water that would relieve his parched tongue, leaving the two conscious occupants and the slumbering Shima behind.

"Do you need anything?" Yukio asked Rin intently.

"No... Well, actually I should probably take a shower. It's been a few days." Rin said hopefully. He had actually showered the day before but he needed some space from the others to clear his head.

"Alright," Yukio replied, hesitant to leave his brother alone, "I'll give you some privacy. If you need anything, I'll be in the other room." Yukio shut the bathroom door behind him and sat down on his bed, giving Rin some much needed privacy.

Yukio held his head in his hands. He knew Rin was searching the room for drugs but what worried him was how calmly Rin reacted to being caught. A normal person would have freaked out when they got caught, they might even get hysterical. But Rin wasn't a normal person.

In the bathroom, Rin took a moment to recollect himself. The only noise in the bathroom was his own breathing. He turned the faucet for the bath on. A warm bath might help sooth his aching body and muscles. If he hadn't been so weak and stupid, Bon, Shima, and Yukio wouldn't be stuck here babysitting him.

He walked around the bathroom and stopped in front of the mirror, taking in his reflection. Shima was right, he did look horrible. He had dark, purple circles under his eyes. His skin was pale and clammy. His cheeks like a looked more hollow than usual.

He felt disgusting and dirty. He was the one responsible for this, this was all his fault.

Rin's eyes watered in frustration, this was all because he had been too weak to handle his own problems. Rin pulled at his hair and started to cry again. What had he done? Rin wanted to disappear and slip away into nothingness.

The water in the bathtub splashed as it filled up, reminding Rin of its presence. The bathtub was now nearly full and the water looked so inviting...

Not bothering to take off his clothes, he stepped into the warm bath water and settled down comfortably. He watched as the water level slowly got higher, and higher. He was so tired and the warm water nearly lulled him to sleep.

Rin let out a shaky breath that he didn't even know he was holding, and submerged his entire body under the water. After a minute or two of holding his breath, his body instinctively gasped out for air, making him inhale mouth falls of water.

Rin's lungs and throat burned painfully and black spots started to cloud his vision,

The world faded to black, and Rin knew nothing more.