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CHAPTER FOUR
Adam was one of those guys. You know the ones. They don't think they're hot shit, they know they're hot shit. They don't think they're gorgeous, they know they're gorgeous. So as he sat they're, tousling his hair and popping the collar of his white school uniform shirt, he was certain that most of the girls in the hall were staring at him, looks of admiration and wanting on their face. Just like his daddy, Adam Davis was a certified sex symbol.
The thing was, he kind of wanted it to end. Well, not really. He actually liked the attention a lot. But at the moment, there was only one person he wanted to stare at him. That one person was none other than Blair Hillary Cohen, the girl whom he was convinced was the most gorgeous girl in the world. The girl that was also, incidentally, staring at him, though without admiration—not completely without wanting. She actually looked kind of mad.
"Where the fuck have you been Adam? I tried calling you all weekend and you are apparently avoiding me." Blair swished her flaxen hair and stared at him, allowing her eyes like tropical pools well with tears. Either she was a very good actress or was very upset with him. Maybe it was both.
"I have not been avoiding you. My dad took away my phone after the incident. You know, when it looks like your son is about to get jiggy with your best friend's daughter, I guess it looks kind of bad. He gave it back to me today though so he can keep me on a leash all day." As if on cue, his cell phone rang to the tune of 'Bittersweet Symphony' by The Verve. He took out the thin black phone and flipped it open. "Adam Davis. Uh huh. You're kidding right? Oh god! Thank you! Yep, see you then. Bye!"
"Who was that? Was it the casting people at GUYS HEART BETSEY? Are you going to be in the show with me? Are you?" It was at this point that Blair realized his girlfriend was definitely a polar bear. She went from being an ice queen to perky blonde in about two seconds flat. Note to Adam: mention this to Dr. Hart.
"Yes. To all questions." Adam smiled cutely and Blair just squealed and kissed him deeply. "Uh, Blair, you realize no one at school knows that we're dating yet. Well, aside from Riley."
"Oh um, right. Well, it's bound to come out in the open anyway."
"Yeah, I guess so. So, we're going out to dinner with pour dads to discuss this tonight?"
"Yeah. They thought it'd be less awkward to leave my mom out of it. Mostly because your mom is dead and everything, but yeah."
"Also because your mom can't accept that her little girl is a little bit of…"
"A slut? Yeah, well dad's having a hard time with that too. Yet, he does not care as much about my slut-dom as my mom does. She's coping. Not in a healthy way, but coping nonetheless."
He looked at her, clearly confused. "Huh?"
"Like today I was in my bathroom. I had an itch in my throat and had to cough. Apparently, she heard and came running in." Blair snapped into her impersonation of Marli. "'Blair, are you throwing up? Blair, are you pregnant? Please don't tell me you're pregnant. You are, aren't you? All that fooling around with that silly boy got you pregnant.'" She snapped out of impersonation mode. "It's hell."
"You aren't pregnant are you?"
"No silly. I don't plan on that one happening. We are careful and we are not going to wind up in that situation. And if I was, mark my words, I'd do a better job of covering it up than throwing up in the bathroom where my mother would be suspiciously lurking trying to get a glimpse of it."
"Okay, good." Adam heard a bell ring and grabbed Blair's arm. "Let's go to calculus, darling." And for once, they were both glad to be going to the wretched class.
As Pratt taught—or rather, droned—on and on about limits, Coop used the time to think about just how much he hated Riley Cohen. She stole his positions in everything. The only type of position she should be allowed to steal from him is a sexual position. No Coop, you will not think about having sex with Riley Cohen. Not only is she the devil in disguise, she is also off limits. Well, then again, Adam is doing a little something with Blair.
Coop told himself that these thoughts couldn't enter his mind, but the more he said it the less he believed it. She was hot. He was hot. She was smart. He was smart. But they had a sworn rivalry. The rivalry that formed the summer he spent in London while his mother was reprising her role of Elphaba in the production of Wicked on the West End. Well, one of his mothers anyway. The other stayed in New York with his brother Porter. But that isn't the point. Before he went to London, he and Riley were kind of like partners-in-crime. When he came back, she decided instead of combining their brains, it would be better if she just took hers and left their perfect little partnership. That bitch.
"Mr. Pierce-Johnson, can you tell us the answer?" Pratt stuck Coop out of his trance. Behind him, Riley looked as though she was about to burst from not getting to give the answer. It was actually kind of entertaining.
"Sure thing. The limit is—"
"Non-existent." Riley couldn't let him answer the fucking problem. She had to just take over and make it all about her. That's all it ever was. The Riley Cohen Is So Smart And Can't Let Anyone Else Be Show. Airing every day, live from Dalton.
"Well, Miss Cohen, you are correct. But that wasn't your question to answer."
"Oh, but I sure Ryan here wouldn't have gotten it correct anyway, Mr. Pratt. He isn't that smart, you see." Riley said these things as if they were the most obvious things in the world. Not smart? Puh-lese.
"First off, R. Co, my name isn't Ryan. Well I guess it technically is Ryan, but no one calls me that. You can call me Coop or Cooper if you must call me anything. Second of all, I am smart, so get off your high horse and maybe take out the stick that seems to be perpetually shoved up your ass."
"Oh that's it Ryan. It's on."
"Oh really And do you really think being pretty will help you win this one?"
"What do you mean?" Riley's face was red and it seemed like smoke would appear magically out of her ears, like on a cartoon. If he were feeling like normal Coop, he'd probably stop and be the gentleman. But now, he couldn't. He was compelled to keep going.
"I mean you use your looks to win everything. I'm a good-looking guy, but that doesn't do anything for me as far as winning goes. Pretty girls appeal to both sexes, while hot boys only appeal to girls. Your whole existence is a lie."
At this point Riley was crying and the whole class, including Mr. Pratt was watching. He just looked at the pair and said, "Get together already." The whole class, especially Blair and Adam was on the floor. The all knew it to be true.
Yet, in an instant Riley's face lit up. "Oh no, Mr. Pratt. I certainly don't like Ryan. Ew. I'm dating Will back there." She got up and walked over to Sir Stoner himself and kissed him passionately. "Isn't that right William?"
"Uh, yeah." Will looked at her, with bloodshot eyes. Well, to be fair, he wasn't actually looking at her, he was looking at her sizeable breasts. And Coop noticed, knowing he shouldn't care but did anyway. "Of course we are. Riley's hot!"
She smiled blindingly. "See you later." She winked at him once more and sat down at her seat. "Well, Ryan looks like I'm not the loser. After all, I can get someone who actually wants to date me."
Coop knew he should just bite back but couldn't. He decided it was best to keep his mouth shut at the moment. He needed to come up with a plan to keep Riley from Will. Not because he liked her or anything. God no. The whole sex thing was a just a joke in his head. But Riley Cohen was like a sister to him. An annoying and bitchy sister, but a sister nonetheless. And he had to keep her away from the bad guy. At all costs.
They say that for every awkward silence, a gay baby is born. If that were true, this dinner had generated enough gay babies to fill Elton John's closet. Honestly, the whole dinner had consisted of two words and then lots of pauses. And Mark sensed some hand play going on between Blair and Adam, but he really didn't want to say anything. Which is how he supposed this whole awkward silence thing began. And why soon, there would be many little Elton John's running around in outrageously feathered costumes singing. It made Blair want to not eat her food when it finally came.
"So, um, we're supposed to talk aren't we?" Mark was surprised to hear Roger breaking the chain of gay babies. He was also surprised to hear his friend so uncertain, as if he didn't really want to know anything about to be said, but felt he had to at the same time.
"Guess so." Adam downed his glass of Coke, wishing it were something stronger like a vodka tonic or 7&7.
"So um, how did you guys get together?" When Roger asked this, Blair and Adam exchanged looks. They knew the real story…
"Adam," Blair walked through the crowd at one of Lila Parson's parties late in July. "You look very handsome tonight. Do you think I look beautiful, because I think you look very handsome." She was slurring her normally perfect speech. It was obvious that she was very, very drunk.
Lucky for her so was he. "Yes Blair. I think you look very buuuu-ti-fuulll. I fucking love you B. Co. Why do you have to be so gorgeous?"
"I fucking love you too A. Dav." And it was at that point she started to kiss him. The kissing later led to them having random se—watching Harry Potter—in Lila Parson's parent's bed.
When they woke up the next morning, they pretended like nothing happened. It's be the last time they ever kissed or had sex or anything. Except they couldn't forget. The drunk hook-ups turned into so much more. And that was how they got to this point.
"I asked her out." Adam pinched Blair hand under the table so that she would know to go along with it.
"Yeah. At Lila Parson's birthday party." No need to add any of the gruesome details was there? It would be fine for him only to know this.
"I thought that it was a sleepover." Mark noted, eyes narrowing. "An all-girl sleepover."
"It was. But there was an actual party before the sleepover you know. And that was co-ed. Duh. When you're turning sixteen, the party the night before your sweet sixteen is always co-ed. You just wouldn't know that because Riley and I had a Bat Mitzvah and you were too cheap to give us both. Which I find stupid because I had to share my Bat Mitzvah with her and she wouldn't go along with the Broadway theme. She's so stupid sometimes…"
"Back on topic, Blair." Adam flashed his famous grin at her.
"Right. So you see, I realize it's been like, a millennium since you went to a sweet sixteen, but that's the way it is now, thanks very much." She downed a gulp of the "sprite" she was drinking. Her father didn't need to know she had tipped the waiter enough to bring her Ketel One and tonics (no one would dare card her) in lieu of Sprite. He also wouldn't know that she had vodka, since she could hold her liquor and he hopefully wouldn't find that out.
"I see." Roger seemed suspicious, but Mark had eaten it all up and seemed oblivious to his friend's suspicious. "I guess in this case, you may have our blessing. But Adam, even though you're my son, I will personally have to kick your ass if you do anything to hurt Blair. For one, she's practically my daughter, as disgusting as that makes your relationship sound. Second, Mark here is my best friend and let's face it: he couldn't beat the crap out of you even if he wanted to. Noah has a better chance of beating you up—sorry, Mark, it's true—and I'm sure he will if you do anything to his sister."
Adam smiled. "You know, I don't plan on ever hurting her, but it'd be nice if you threatened to kick her ass if she hurt me. Nice to know that you love me, your son. Thanks Dad. Love you too."
"Anytime kiddo."
"I can't believe you don't think I could beat Adam up…" This was a major blow to Mark's ego. "I could. I totally could."
"Okay Daddy. Keep thinking that. If you tell it to yourself enough times, maybe it'll come true."
"Blair Hillary! If you keep it up, I may have to evoke my blessing. Then you won't be able to date Adam."
"Daddy, I just love how you think that'll stop us. We managed to keep it secret for quite a while, so what makes you think we wouldn't do it again." There. She was satisfied that it would shut him up. Finally, the food arrived at the table. Suddenly, she was ravenous.
A/N: Whoo! Update! I know this took forever, but it is summer break now, so updates should be much more frequent. I'm determined to finish this story before I go off to debate camp because I definitely don't want to leave you all hanging for two weeks straight. Especially since at that point, all the good parts of the plot will be happening. So anyway, I liked this. What do you think? I refuse to update quickly as promised if I don't get reviews. This is on principal. And I am so sorry this was so short.