Author's Note- I know the formula so far has been present then the past. But I decided to start mixing it up. I'll make it clear, so don't fret. Now, by request, Sheldon's dad gives his son 'The Talk'.
Xxx
(Then)
So far, Sheldon had been able to avoid his entire family by holing up in his room and finishing his dissertation. He expected to be done and have his doctorate by Christmas. Sadly, he was unable to avoid them forever and had to face his father at dinner.
"Sheldon, there is a time in every young man's life," Joe Cooper began, but a look from Mary made him stop.
"Danny, honey, why don't you go to your room?" Mary said to their youngest child.
"What about dessert?" Danny whined.
"Have some cake!" Mary thrust the plate at him and the ten year old scampered off. "Joe, is this really the time?"
"Hell yeah it is. Sheldon is becoming a man and Missy must be becoming a woman. They need to hear the facts," Joe grumbled. "Now, Sheldon, you're 16. That means you're becoming a man and you will have urges."
"Dad, please." Sheldon turned a light pink.
"Now, now, Shelly. There will be times when your body is telling you to do things that may seem strange," Joe burped.
"What brought this on?" Missy asked. "Aren't we a little old for 'the talk' Daddy?"
"I caught Sheldon kissing the neighbor girl the morning," Joe said through a mouthful of steak and potatoes. Mary dropped her fork onto her plate and Missy turned to her father.
"I didn't know the Grangers had a daughter," she said lightly.
"It was the Derris girl." Joe shuffled in his seat. "The urges can come at any time. When you're awake or asleep. At home or at church-"
"No, never in God's house!" Mary snapped.
"You kissed Amy?" Missy's mouth was gaping open.
"Okay, not at church," Joe retracted. "But you will start noticing girls. And women. For some men, they will start noticing the chest. Those are beautiful things. And for others, it's the rear. That is also a beautiful body part."
"Please stop!" Mary yelled and slammed her glass on the table.
"Why were you kissing Amy? When? How?" Missy was almost screaming.
"She came over last night to look for her book. A chain of events resulted in a physical encounter," Sheldon answered coolly and picked up a forkful of potatoes.
"Last night? In my house?" Mary said sharply.
"And this morning on the Derris's front porch," Joe said. "Now, Sheldon, when you get these urges, there are several ways to take care of it. One is with a woman. There are numerous ways that you and said woman can-"
"Since when were you and Amy even speaking?" Missy asked her now bright red brother.
"SHUT UP JOSEPH!" Mary yelled. "No one will be having sex in this house." She stood. "Missy, Sheldon, go to your rooms. Joseph, a word."
Xxx
(Now)
"I wonder why Sheldon never told us about this chick," Howard muttered.
"And I'm wondering why we're standing in the doorway," Leonard said. "I live here." The threesome made their way into the apartment. Almost immediately, Howard picked up a picture. "Wow Sheldon." He showed it to the others.
"You were with her?" Leonard asked. Raj leaned over and whispered something in his ear. "Raj says he can't believe it and wants to know if she's insane."
"If I had known her," Howard purred. "Lord knows how many pages of the Kama Sutra we would have recreated."
"Howard!" Penny snapped. "This is Sheldon's lost love. She's engaged to some jerk and his heart is broken. Show some respect."
"I was just saying I never would have let that go," Howard retorted. "That's why we're here. Maybe we could figure out what went wrong and he could get her back.'
"Nice save," Leonard said to him in a sotto voice. Howard shrugged and they turned back to Sheldon and the box.
"If anyone knows about failed relationships, it would be you and Leonard," Sheldon muttered and began to look through the box.
"I resent that," Howard said.
"It is true." Leonard knew his roommate had a point.
"Yep." Howard slumped in his seat as he came to the same realization. Sheldon produced a small red pinwheel.
"This is a memento from our first date."
Xxx
(Then)
The county fair stopped by the week after the Fourth of July as it did every year. This year, Missy was running for the Dairy Princess and Sheldon was going to ask Amy to go with him. It didn't seem like such a big deal, but asking a girl to be your date to the fair actually was. From what Sheldon had observed over the years, the fair provided ample opportunities for a couple to engage in either physical intimacy or emotionally bond. While the former seemed more appealing, Sheldon had a feeling they would end up exploring the latter. His mother had given him a talk as well, this one centering on the emotional side of relationships. No body parts or urges had been mentioned.
The Coopers and Amy arrived early, since Missy had to be there hours before the contest. Joe and Mary went off to look at the animals, Joe winking at Sheldon and slipping him a wrinkled twenty.
"What was that about?" Amy asked when his parents were out of earshot.
"My father is under the impression you are a prostitute," Sheldon said dryly and Amy started to laugh. "What?"
"That's what fathers do," she giggled and gestured for him to follow her. "We can either go in the haunted house or pick up the freebies at the booths down the way."
"I would prefer the haunted house over cheap pencils and magnets," Sheldon said.
Some haunted houses have little cars that take you through the house and some just left you to walk around and possibly die. The one at this particular fair was the latter. The ticket man just grunted and waved them inside.
"What? No flashlight? No map. Not even a 'good luck fair warrior'?" Sheldon started to rant until he saw Amy going in ahead of him. "Wait up!"
It was dark and smelled like wet cats and cardboard. So far, the only remotely scary thing Sheldon had seen was a spider that hadn't even been part of the house. Amy wandered close to him, although he couldn't see in the dark. As they got to the second floor of the house, a witch popped out from the ceiling and it came loose from its strings, falling to the floor in front of them. Amy swore loudly and grabbed his hand. There were no protests in his mind, nor was there the urge to slip his hand from hers. When the next thing fell from the ceiling (a skeleton) he was grateful to have her so close. He squeezed her hand once to assure her they were still safe. A green light filtered into the room and fell on Amy as they made their way back downstairs. Sheldon felt something shoot through his brain and down past his stomach. His brain interpreted that as want, desire. It felt strange, yet good.
"Hold on," he said in a hoarse voice when they reached the middle of the stairs.
"What is it Shell?" Amy asked, still holding his hand. Sheldon's free hand cupped her chin and he pulled her towards him. He pressed her against him until it felt like she had molded into him. They stood on the steps until their lips were red and swollen, their cheeks were flushed and their hearts beating faster than a space shuttle taking off.
"Wow," Amy whispered as they neared the exit of the haunted house.
"I agree," Sheldon said. They reached the outside and were almost blown back into the house. While they had been 'exploring' the house and each other, a storm had kicked up and people all around them were fleeing for cover in the little building where there was a food court, some freebies and a lot of salesmen. The couple ran for that as well, the structural integrity of the haunted house being suspect. When they were under a stable roof, Sheldon saw that a lot of people were staring at him. At first, he thought maybe there was an obvious sign of what they had been doing in the haunted house. But, Amy rectified that by reaching up and pulling something out of his hair.
"It's a pinwheel," she said as she blew on it. "See?" The small object began to spin lazily and Sheldon felt himself smile at its spirit. "I see a free table. We can sit and talk until the storm passes."
Xxx
Author's Note: Fourth down. Sorry its so bad. Right now, it is 1:21 am Eastern Time and I am pooped. I have an idea for the next chapter: Amy makes an actual, non-flashback appearance when Missy confronts her about Amy breaking her twin's heart. I'm unsure whether to put that in so early. If not that, then it will be a longer version of that chapter's flashback. Any advice is welcome and remember, reviewing is better than Halo 3 or sex. (Just watched the Dumpling Paradox and I'm still laughing.)