Chapter 4

Kurt didn't know what to think after the other night. Other Kurt didn't look too good. He looked miserable, like something happened, but Kurt couldn't even talk to him about it because he'd been surprisingly quiet. He hadn't come out to talk in days.

At first, Kurt tried to find a way to communicate with him but it seemed like while they were one, he couldn't access anything from him. Unless Other Kurt thought about it. That was his theory at least.

When he thought up the name Matt the other day, he had a feeling Other Kurt had been thinking about him. They were both in the same body, and Kurt had control, but it seemed like Other Kurt could still think and manipulate what they were thinking about.

It was weird that Kurt was trying to get him to come out now to talk. Before he had been so adamant that he stay inside and they stay one since all this started. He had gotten so distracted by him that he almost forgot his promise to Blaine. He promised to call him.

Rachel had understood him when he said they were going to be friends again. It was sort of what she was hinting at before. Everyone thought they were this perfect couple that couldn't be destroyed. Well, Kurt felt pretty destroyed. He had physically broken into two.

Maybe it was psychological. It had only been a couple times they split and now it felt like so long since the last time. But then something reminded him that it was indeed real and he had to think that was Other Kurt reminding him.

Kurt was in control now. But what if he wasn't always? Like Other Kurt had said in the beginning, may the best Kurt win. What if Other Kurt took over somehow? Right now he didn't see it happening. Other Kurt seemed too upset from before, and it was as if he was recuperating right now.

Kurt went through his days, going to work and coming home, wondering when the next moment would be that he'd see Other Kurt.

Then he figured he better call Blaine. And he hoped desperately that Blaine hadn't done anything stupid.

Kurt dialled his number, waiting for him to pick up.

"Kurt?" Blaine asked, his voice coming out so small.

"Hi, Blaine," Kurt said. It was the first time he talked to him since their Skype call before.

"How… how are you?" Blaine asked.

"Okay," Kurt responded. "You?"

"Okay. No. That's a lie," Blaine said with a sigh.

"What happened?" Kurt asked softly.

"No one… they still… they don't notice. That anything's wrong. And I know I shouldn't be putting this on you because this is all my fault but I didn't tell you when I was upset before so I probably should now."

Kurt bit his lip. "I'm listening."

"Uh… not sure if you've been talking to Finn lately after he and Rachel broke up… but uh, he's helping with the musical here."

Kurt had had a few brief conversations with Finn over the last while, but nothing too in depth. He had mentioned that much. "Yeah."

"They wanted me to audition. It's… Grease. They wanted me to be Danny. But I couldn't… how could I? It's a romantic lead… and I ruined our romance, our relationship, I just couldn't."

Kurt frowned. In any other situation, Blaine would have been the perfect Danny. And Kurt would have loved to see him in that role. But now, it was all so bittersweet.

"So you're not in it?"

Blaine scoffed. "They guilted me into being Teen Angel. I didn't want to be in it at all."

"Oh, well… I can talk to Finn if you want…" Kurt trailed off.

"No, it's okay. I'll do it. It's just one scene," Blaine said.

They were silent for a moment then Blaine continued. "God, why is this so hard. How did I screw this up so badly?"

"We just need… time," Kurt said. Talking to Blaine felt akin to torture. He was still warring with himself and he could feel Other Kurt stirring the more they talked.

"Right. Time."

Kurt chewed on his lip more. "But other than that… are you… you're okay? I mean that's silly, we're both not, but… are you… talking to them more?"

"I'm trying to," Blaine said.

"Right," Kurt said.

"Sorry, I have no right to make you listen to my problems… is there anything you want to talk about?"

Kurt hesitated for a second. What if he told Blaine? No, Blaine was the cause of all this madness.

"Not much different here," Kurt eventually said.

"Kurt, you can yell at me, scream, cry, whatever you want."

Kurt could do all those things, but he didn't have the energy right now. "Um, Finn got us tickets to the musical. I think we're going to come back to see it."

Blaine sucked in a sharp breath. "You're coming to see the musical? So you'll be in Lima?"

"Yeah," Kurt said. "It's been a while since I've been there, and I miss my Dad and everyone."

"Right," Blaine said.

"We can talk in person," Kurt said softly.

"Yeah, I'd like that."

Kurt nodded, and closed his eyes. "So it's not that far off… and I'll see you soon."

"Are we going to talk at all? Before that?"

"We'll see, Blaine," Kurt said. "But... you can call me. If you need to. If you can't talk to them."

"Thanks, Kurt," Blaine said.

"I'll see you soon," Kurt said.

"See you," Blaine said. "Love you."

Kurt hung up the phone. Blaine always hung up with a "love you" but Kurt couldn't today. Not yet.

Now all he had to do was find tickets to Ohio.

Kurt had been nervous about going back to Ohio. He was going to see Blaine again, and everyone else. And Other Kurt had still been really quiet. He didn't know if that was a blessing or some sort of omen.

Rachel had come with him, excited to see her dads again, and surprisingly, not as upset about Finn as she could have been. Maybe because she was the one who broke up with him. Or maybe it was because she had started seeing Brody more.

Kurt got off the plane and ran into his dad's arms, just as Rachel ran to her own dads.

"Missed you, buddy," Burt said.

"I missed you too, Dad," Kurt replied.

They got home and it felt weird for Kurt to be back. The house didn't look much different and Kurt's room was exactly as he left it, minus the things he took with him to New York. Which did include the bed.

"Bought you an air mattress. I know it's not the best, but..." Burt said.

"It's perfect," Kurt responded.

He greeted Finn, who couldn't stop talking about the play and then finally buckled down and asked about Rachel.

"She's… okay," Kurt said.

Finn nodded. "And you?"

Kurt shrugged. "I talked to Blaine the other day."

"You did? He didn't say anything… though he did seem to be a little bit happier."

Kurt nodded. "We're going to talk again. That's why I'm here. After the show."

"Okay, man," Finn said. "Rachel... is she… here too?"

"Yeah. Just… go easy on her, if you talk to her. Okay?"

Finn nodded. "She's the one who broke up with me this time."

Kurt smiled slightly and soon, Finn was rushing out the door to get ready. He waited for Kurt to come too, and they all headed to McKinley together.

Finn had to run backstage and asked if Kurt wanted to join him, but Kurt wasn't prepared to see Blaine yet, so he took a seat in the audience. Rachel joined him shortly, sitting down beside him. He'd see Blaine after the show.

The show was wonderful, and the new kids were pretty good. But when Blaine sang, Kurt couldn't take his eyes away.

His voice was so low and melodious and he was amazing at the part, standing up there in all white. Kurt could have sworn Blaine caught his eye a few times throughout the performance and was worried he'd break into tears. Kurt almost did in his seat.

He was feeling antsy, and knew something might happen, but he had to be there.

The show ended and Kurt stood up to clap, watching as Rachel left the room. He sighed, and made his way past the people leaving and to the backstage area. He saw everyone and gave hugs to them. He'd missed them all. It felt like so long since he'd been in high school. And then there was Blaine, standing sheepishly behind them all, like he didn't want to interrupt.

Everyone else shuffled aside, watching them for a moment.

"Kurt… you really… you're here," Blaine said, his eyes wide. He bit his lip and Kurt could tell how much he was falling apart at the seams. Almost as much as Kurt was himself, seeing Blaine.

Maybe this was a huge mistake.

Finn looked at everyone, motioning for them to clear out. Kurt could hear vague whispers as the others left. 'Maybe he'll sort Blaine out. He's been acting weird lately' and 'They must have missed each other so much.' Some of them had no idea what happened.

Soon it was just Kurt and Blaine, standing there and looking at each other backstage. Kurt shifted on his feet, trying to find something to say.

"I didn't think you'd actually come," Blaine finally said.

"I'm here," Kurt said.

It was physically painful to look at Blaine. This was Blaine, and he cheated on him. Kurt hadn't lied on the phone when he said how much he loved Blaine still, but they were so broken. Kurt couldn't trust him now. And he wanted to rebuild that trust but he really didn't know how.

"Yeah," Blaine said, wrapping his arms around himself.

They both stood there, sneaking glances at each other again.

"You were… really good tonight," Kurt said.

Blaine shrugged. "Almost broke down when I saw you."

"Blaine. I'm trying here, but it physically pains me to see you right now, knowing what happened."

Blaine took a step forward, his hand reaching out as if to take Kurt's but Kurt took a step back. "Please, don't touch me right now."

Blaine recoiled, wrapping his arms back around himself tighter.

"I want… I want us to get back to where we were. I told you that. But I don't trust you now and we have to work on that. So… I'm here. And we can talk."

Blaine nodded. "What do you want to talk about?"

They stared at each other again, neither of them saying anything. Kurt shrugged.

Blaine looked worse the more time they spent standing there until Kurt could see a tear slip down his face. Blaine looked away, trying to hide it and Kurt really wanted to punch himself for what he did next. He heard Blaine sniffling more and then Kurt walked over to him, wrapping his arms around him.

Kurt hugged Blaine, both of them sinking down to the ground, and rubbed his back to console him as Blaine let everything out. He couldn't think of anything else to do, and touching Blaine sent a sharp spark of fear through him, but Blaine was alone. And he made a mistake. And they were going to work through it.

But then he felt it, that tearing sensation. Kurt looked up and Other Kurt was staring at them with a frown on his face. Kurt's eyes widened and he shook his head but Other Kurt shrugged and walked away. With him gone, Kurt's ideas of doubt about Blaine had lessened, and here he was, with the man he loved, and they were going to fix this somehow, no matter how long it took.

Other Kurt stormed out of the auditorium, too frustrated with everything to think right. Kurt was in there, comforting Blaine, while he himself was completely a mess. Yet, Blaine was the one who got comfort. How fair was that?

He just wanted to scream. Blaine didn't deserve comfort. Maybe if he had done something else they could work through this much more easily. But this was cheating. He physically let someone else fuck him, because he couldn't wait two weeks.

Other Kurt walked into the hallways of McKinley, trying his hardest to get out of there. He couldn't be in this place any longer. He thought he could do it. Merge with Kurt and try to forgive Blaine and work it out with him. But he couldn't. Just seeing him made him sick to his stomach and he wanted to either punch Blaine or cry. So he had to leave.

Kurt could do whatever the fuck he wanted with Blaine. But he was out.

Other Kurt was almost at the doors when he ran into Sam. "Hey, Kurt! Leaving so soon? We barely had time to see you!"

He turned around to face Sam and stared at him. "What do you want, Sam?"

"Whoh, are you okay?" Sam asked.

He shook his head. "Why are you asking me that? Why won't you talk to Blaine or ask him that? Because he's not okay, but I can't be the only one who notices that and has to talk to him. I can't do that anymore. So you have to."

Same stared at him shocked. "Kurt, what are you talking about? I mean, I know Blaine's been down, but you guys are different. You can work it out."

"Did he tell you? That he cheated on me?"

Sam looked uncomfortable but nodded. "I know he's a mess, man. He said he doesn't even gel on the weekends, and that sounds serious."

"So why aren't you doing something to help him?" Other Kurt yelled.

"I… I'm trying. But we've been busy with the musical."

"Look. He feels alone, and despite me hating him for what he did and destroying our relationship, which I truly thought was forever, I can't let anything happen to him. So now that's on you, alright? You make sure he doesn't do anything else stupid. You make sure he's still here every day, and you make sure he isn't moping around depressed all the time."

Sam looked horrified. "I didn't know it was that bad. And if you're so angry at him… why do you care that much?"

"Because I still love the idiot. But I can't be there for him right now. So it's up to you. And Finn. Or whoever else in this place is willing to do something. But I have to go now. I can't be here with him."

Sam pleaded, "Are you sure? We're having an after party and I know the others would want to see you?"

He sighed and took a breath. "I'm sure I'll join you guys later. I just need some air and time alone."

"Okay," Sam said. "Sorry, for… not looking out for him."

Other Kurt let out a huff of air. "No, I'm sorry, Sam. You didn't do anything wrong. I'm taking out my anger on him on you. And I shouldn't do that. I'll see you later."

Sam nodded.

Other Kurt turned back around and stormed outside. He stared at the sky for a moment and screamed, not knowing what that would do to help. Maybe he was evil. He couldn't forgive Blaine, and Kurt seemed to be able to touch him and hug him and talk to him. But not him. He wanted to punch him and never speak to him again.

He needed to get out of here. He needed to distract himself. He needed sex.

He didn't know where that thought came from. He had only ever been with Blaine. And Matt now. And that was a horrible experience. So why did he want to do it again?

He couldn't be with Blaine. That would never work. Many people had casual sex. Maybe he could find that Eli guy and fuck him too. Then they'd be even. Sort of. No, he couldn't even think of that.

But if he couldn't be with Blaine, maybe he should try to find someone else. And at the least get some action. He was just so angry. His body was longing for revenge, and at the moment, it seemed like the best idea.

He looked around the parking lot and realized Finn drove them there. He didn't know where he'd go or what to do. But then he figured it out. Scandals.

He ended up taking a cab, no other way to get there, and looked at the building. The last time he'd been there, he'd still been with Blaine, and he'd run into Sebastian. And Karofsky. Maybe this wasn't the best idea.

He shrugged and walked inside. The guy at the front didn't even seem to care he didn't have ID on him. He looked more like he was asleep.

Other Kurt walked to the bar and debated it before ordering himself a beer. It couldn't hurt, right? One beer. He'd be fine. As long as he didn't puke.

He sat there, nursing the beer for a while, and watching some of the people dance. He did a quick scout of the room and confirmed that he didn't see Sebastian or Karofsky. So he was safe. He finished off his beer and made his way onto the dance floor. At least he could lose himself here.

He started dancing and noticed he was starting to attract a lot of attention. And not all from the right crowd. It had seemed rather tame in here the last time he was there, possibly because he was there with two other guys. But now, with him there alone, he seemed to be quite popular.

"Hey, hun, let me dance with you?" Someone asked him, coming up close and grinding themselves against his ass.

He swiveled his head around. He wasn't bad looking but he had this greasy feel to him. "No thanks," Other Kurt said, pushing him away.

The guy didn't look too happy and moved back closer. "What's wrong sweet cheeks? Not up for a little bump n grind?"

Were those the lines this guy was using? Seriously? "Look. Not interested."

The guy couldn't seem to take a hint, and spun Other Kurt around, pulling him in close.

He stared at him for a moment, wondering how he got so in over his head.

"The guy said no," someone else called out.

Other Kurt looked up and there was a tall blonde standing there, his hands on his hips.

"Come on, man. I was just messing around."

"Well, enough."

The first guy walked away and Other Kurt looked at the blonde guy. "Thanks."

"No problem. Don't see you here often."

Other Kurt blinked. Really? More lines.

The guy winced. "Sorry, didn't mean it to sound like that. I'm Andrew."

"Kurt," Other Kurt said.

"Look, I know it's none of my business," Andrew started. "But you look kind of miserable. Want to talk?"

Kurt shrugged but then before he knew it, he was sitting in Andrew's car with him, blurting out everything that happened with Blaine. It must be the alcohol making him do this.

"I mean, should I forgive him? He cheated on me, but he's a mess now, and I'm a mess now, and I don't normally do this, this… going to bars and dancing with random guys. We were together for so long and he cheated on me."

Andrew looked understanding, doing nothing more than hold Kurt as he talked. "It's rough. I had a boyfriend cheat on me before."

Other Kurt looked up at him. "What did you do? Did you forgive him?"

Andrew shook his head. "I hope that bastard's rotting in hell right now. Last I heard his latest partner gave him syphilis."

Other Kurt snorted. "Sorry, it's not funny."

"It kind of is," Andrew said.

Andrew had been so nice to him and Other Kurt stared at him for a moment before he slowly leaned in and kissed him.

"Hey, are you sure about this?" Andrew asked. "You still seem pretty broken up about your ex."

Other Kurt shrugged. "Feels right." He leaned in to kiss Andrew again, and this time Andrew responded.

It was different. Nothing like when he was with Blaine, and completely different from Matt. But it was nice. And that was a welcome change. It felt comforting. Other Kurt kissed him again, his hands moving to wrap around Andrew's neck, and Andrew leaned back slightly, so they were lying down as well as they could in the backseat of his car.

Was this what Andrew had planned? Listen to his sob story and then have sex? He should have seen it sooner. Why else were they in the back seat? Either way, he didn't feel like stopping. This was nice.

They kissed for a while, Andrew's hand going to Other Kurt's shirt, and slipping under. "Is this okay?" he asked.

Other Kurt nodded, feeling how hard he was. "Wanna… wanna fuck you."

Andrew blinked. "Look, you seem upset still. I don't want to be used for some sort of revenge."

Other Kurt sighed and pouted. "Fine."

Andrew seemed to think for a moment then shrugged. "Fuck it. We can have sex."

Other Kurt smirked and undid Andrew's pants, and then his own. They maneuvered themselves so they were lying down more comfortably in the back seat, half against the window. It was a tight fit, and the car wasn't that big, but they managed to make it work.

Andrew reached under the seat, pulling out a small bottle of lube and a condom and Other Kurt laughed.

"And you said you didn't want to have sex."

"I'm always prepared," he shrugged.

Other Kurt giggled again, getting them ready and lining himself up. "Okay?" he asked.

"Okay," Andrew said.

It wasn't much longer before Other Kurt was fucking Andrew in the car, the windows turning steamy and their breaths coming out in pants.

It didn't take long, both of them moaning and gripping onto each other before Andrew let out a few curse words and came; Other Kurt thrusting a few more times and then collapsing on top of him.

They took a moment to breathe and Andrew said. "Wasn't expecting that, but glad it happened."

Other Kurt nodded. It felt good. Unlike the last time with Matt. He was satisfied.

After a few minutes, Andrew moved apart and started getting dressed. "Hey, so, I should probably get going now."

"Right," Other Kurt said.

"You need a lift somewhere?"

Other Kurt shrugged. "I'm okay."

"Okay," Andrew said. "You know, your ex doesn't deserve you. You're pretty awesome. And hey, we should catch up one day."

Other Kurt grinned lightly. "I don't live in Ohio anymore. I'm just visiting."

Andrew sighed. "That's a shame. Well, I'll give you my number anyway. If you're ever back in town?"

"Thanks," Other Kurt said.

He got up and out of the car, sharing one more kiss with Andrew before he drove off. Then he looked around himself, standing alone in the parking lot of Scandals and swore. How was he going to get home now? He forgot he didn't have a car.

Kurt had ended up going to the after party with everyone. He and Blaine hadn't spoken much after Blaine broke down but they were sitting near each other again.

Sam was sitting especially close to Blaine for some reason and kept looking at Kurt strangely, as if wondering why he was sitting so close to Blaine. But Kurt had hope. Maybe Sam would be there for Blaine more now.

They talked with everyone and caught up, Kurt explaining the trials and tribulations of working for Vogue. Mercedes talked about her vocal work. Rachel went on and on about NYADA, however she refused to speak to Finn anymore. Something must have happened there too.

Kurt really did miss everyone else though, so it was great to see them.

Soon, his phone started ringing and Kurt excused himself to take it. He had no idea who would be calling him. Almost everyone he knew was right there. The number was unlisted too.

"Hello?" Kurt asked.

"Oh. You picked up. Awesome."

Kurt blinked. That sounded like himself. Oh god. What did Other Kurt do now?

"Yes, I did. What did you do? Why are you calling me?"

"I need your help," he said quietly.

"What do you need?" Kurt asked.

"I'm kinda stranded in a parking lot. I need you to pick me up."

Kurt closed his eyes and ran his fingers over his face. "What?"

"I'm at Scandals."

"Oh God. What did you do?"

"I hitched a cab here, drank a beer, need a ride."

Kurt huffed a sigh of annoyance. "I'll be there soon."

"Love ya," Other Kurt replied.

Kurt walked back into the room, saying he needed to go. Blaine looked horrified, like he'd never see him again, but Kurt promised he was there for the whole weekend. They could see each other again soon.

Finn looked at him confused, but Kurt just asked if he could borrow the car for a bit. Finn nodded.

"I just need to get some air. I'll see you all later."

"Dude, don't worry. I'll get a ride home with someone," Finn said.

Kurt left and drove to Scandals, afraid of what he'd see. But when he got there, he just saw his other self leaning against the side of the building.

Kurt leaned out the window. "Get in here," he hissed.

Other Kurt looked up and got inside the car. "Thanks."

"Right," Kurt said. He got a good look at him and frowned. "What were you doing here? You look like… oh my god. Are you drunk?"

"Maybe a little. I swear I only had one beer."

"And that worked out so well when Blaine claimed to have only had one beer the last time we were here."

"Let's just go home," Other Kurt said.

Kurt stared at him. "Why are your clothes and hair so rumpled? What were you doing?"

Other Kurt looked at him and shrugged. "Dunno."

Kurt started driving them home anyway, pondering the possibilities in his mind. It wasn't until they pulled into the driveway at home that he stared at him.

"Did you... were you with someone?"

Other Kurt stared at him, his eyes wide, and then he disappeared.

Kurt stared at where Other Kurt used to be, panting in shock. He could somehow feel a bit of the alcohol now, and blinked. What just happened?

Hey all. Hope you enjoyed! Let me know what you think!

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