3/27/10
Script ep: 4
Warriors Parody
Into the Wild
(After Intro)
Scene 1
Narrator: We see Firepaw-standing in the middle of the clearing licking himself.
Firepaw: Are you gay?
Narrator: Yes.
Firepaw: Please leave me alone fag.
Narrator: I refuse.
Firepaw: Oh okay then.
Narrator: Just then Bluestar walks into the clearing.
Bluestar: Get the fuck out of here NOW!
Narrator: Yes. (Staring at her with a stupid expression.)
Bluestar: (Stares back) Are you gay?
Narrator: No.
Firepaw: Fuck you.
Graypaw: (Graypaw walks up)
Bluestar: Leave this place.
Graypaw: You bitch.
Bluestar: Go hunting or something you Jew.
Graypaw: (Stares with his mouth hanging open then starts to cry.)
Bluestar: WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Bluestar: (Smacks him up-side the head.) SHUT THE FUCK UP!
All: (Stares at Bluestar.)
Bluestar: (Leaves)
Graypaw: Ummm…ok then anybody want to hunt?
Firepaw: I would!
Graypaw: Wait we need to get a warrior to come with us.
Firepaw: Nah Fuck em all.
Graypaw: M'Kay
End Scene 1
Scene 2
Graypaw: HELLO?
Firepaw: (Smacks him.)
Firepaw: Yea top notch hunting you idiot.
Graypaw: I thought I saw something over in those bushes.
Firepaw: So you greet it? It could be prey dumbass.
Graypaw: No, it looked like a cat.
Firepaw: Again why would you call out-
Narrator: Suddenly Firepaw was attacked from behind by a gray she-cat.
Firepaw: Mother of- (Is silenced with a slash to the face.)
Firepaw: HELP ME GRAYPAW!!!
Graypaw: Oh I'm sorry I'm to busy talking to large prey.
Firepaw: FUCK YOU!!!
Graypaw: Gladly (Turns and leaves.)
Narrator: Firepaw backs away from the she-cats cold claws.
Firepaw: Why aren't you helping me!?!?!
Narrator: Because I'm gay remember.
Firepaw: (mumbles) Mother fucking whore.
She-Cat: Enough talk I eat you. You go in tummy.
Firepaw: Ewww cannibalism much.
She-Cat: SILENCE!
Narrator: Graypaw returns.
Graypaw: Hello?
Firepaw: (facepalm) For the love of everything good, SHUT UP GRAYPAW!!
Graypaw: (huffs) Fine I won't share any of my prey.
She-Cat: P-p-prey!!!!!
Narrator: The she-cat runs over and tackles Graypaw (knocking him out) and starts to devour his fresh-kill.
Firepaw: Asshole….it's not polite to knock people out for their food.
She-cat: *Ignores*
Firepaw: Fine, asshole, you deserve this! *attacks*
(Fight scene 3 Firepaw vs. Strange cat A.K.A. the scene that I'm to lazy to write. After all this is for humor not for fucking fighting :D)
Narrator: Hey Firepaw pined the cat down what a fucking surprise.
Firepaw: Don't sound so thrilled people will assume you care.
Narrator: Pfft I'll just deny it.
She-cat: Hey asshole, get off me I didn't know apprentices got so horny.
Firepaw: *Rolls eyes* Who are you?
She-cat: I'm Yellowfang Ex-Medicine cat of Shadowclan.
Firepaw: Ex?
Yellowfang: Yeah, I was accused of molesting apprentices…so they ran me out.
Firepaw: *Eyes widen and he takes a step back* Okay…..
Yellowfang: Anyway…..BYE! *Attempts to run but trips on a branch and goes flying into a tree.*
Yellowfang: OWWW SHIT!
Firepaw: *Laughs hysterically*
Yellowfang: *Rolls around in pain* You fucking asshole!
Graypaw: Oh suck it up you old hag.
Firepaw: Come on Graypaw we should take her back to camp.
Graypaw: M'Kay
End Scene 2
Scene 3
Narrator: Firepaw and Graypaw walk in with a cat unfamiliar to Thunderclan.
Bluestar: *ignores the narrator* What are you doing Firepaw?
Firepaw: Me and Graypaw found this cat wondering around….she's hurt.
Bluestar What! *rage* you think that you should just come in here helping someone who do you think we are good cats?!?!?!
Graypaw: What?
Bluestar: Shut up Firepaw!
Graypaw: That was me.
Firepaw: Keep your damn mouth shut!
Firepaw and Graypaw: Uhhhh…
Bluestar: Firepaw because you didn't keep your mouth shut and because you helped a defenseless cat-
Yellowfang: Defenseless!?
Bluestar: You will have to take care of this cat get it fat so we can eat it later. If it dies before it's gets fat the clan will eat you!
Firepaw: *Gulp* Yes Bluestar.
Bluestar: Good, BTW, you're going to the next gathering.
Firepaw: What?
Bluestar: Did I stutter bitch? You're going to the gathering!
Firepaw: Ummm thanks…
Bluestar: Oh and what's his name can go. His name starts with a "G" I want to say Gregory.
Firepaw: Graypaw?
Graypaw: Ummm me?
Bluestar: Yeah, him, tell him he's going to the gathering tonight.
Graypaw: (Waves at Bluestar) Yeah, ummm, right here!
Bluestar: (Stares off into space) Kaythainxbai!
Graypaw: Ass.
End Scene 3
End episode 4
Sorry for the unusually short and late one guys I have been caught by the deadly virus called laziness.