Golem Chapter 4: Dybbuk, a fullmetal alchemist fanfic

Thank you to everyone who reviewed, liked, and followed this fic! This is my first serious attempt into FMA and I hope you continue to enjoy it!

The Latin dialogue was brought to you by Google Translate. Please understand I don't speak a lick of Latin, so don't expect any accuracy. My apologies to any native/fluent Latin speakers.

Warning: violence, gore

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Golem Chapter 4 - Dybbuk

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"Hey, Brother! Dinner's ready!" Alphonse found his brother sitting in the study surrounded by dozens of alchemy books.

"Hey, what're you looking at?" Alphonse stepped to his brother's side. Edward didn't respond at first, he continued to skim the complex mathematics written in their ancestral language. It was one of their earliest textbooks when they first began to practice alchemy and written by their father's teacher. It was a book that Edward often kept for reference when they needed to return to basics.

"Just skimming," Edward mumbled, flipping a page. "I haven't seen this in a long time and just wanted to take a look."

Alphonse didn't miss the wistful look in Edward's gaze. He glanced at the other books piled neatly on the desk. They were all Edward's favorite textbooks. Some he knew Edward had read dozens of times to the point of memorization. He watched Edward slowly skim a particularly complicated algorithm and rest the tip of his finger on a specific calculation, no doubt thinking of how he would revise the calculation to get a better result.

Edward was hailed as a true child prodigy of alchemy. A young god with unbelievable potential and power at his disposal. Many thought he would grow to become one of the legends of alchemy and have several textbooks about his skills written for upcoming alchemists. However, what made Edward a genius was not his technical skill, but his deep love of the art. Alphonse never saw his brother more alive than when he performed a transmutation or created a new alchemical array. The more complicated or impossible, the more excited and determined Edward became. His encounter with Truth left a burning desire for knowledge that added an extra spark to his passionate brother.

It saddened Alphonse. To bring him back to the world of the living, Edward gave up something he loved. After the chaos and mess finally died down and they had a chance to actually breathe, Alphonse saw the dimmed light in Edward's eyes. While Edward remained his energetic and impassioned self, it was like something was still missing. He didn't have that fire anymore. At first, Alphonse and everyone thought it was simply Edward finding peace after so many years of suffering, but as time went on, Alphonse saw the missing piece. Especially in moments like now, when Edward stared unblinking at his old alchemy books.

Alphonse didn't want to upset his brother, but he had to know. "Do you wish you could use alchemy again?"

"All the time," Edward traced a beautifully designed array on the page. "There's so much I could do. This symbol here - I would adjust it just a little and try it again. But I can't." He leaned back into the chair with a heavy sigh. "I miss it. I spent my whole life being an alchemist…"

Alphonse felt the pang of guilt. He knew without doubt that Edward didn't regret giving up his alchemy. Edward was at a point to give up anything to see his little brother returned to his body. If the roles were reversed, Alphonse would've done the same without a second thought. However, it still pained him to see the hole it left behind in Edward.

Maybe there was a way. Maybe they could find another Gate or Alphonse could create a new transmutation circle that would restore Edward's passion. There were emerging studies on the physiology of alchemy and how it impacts the body. There were even arguments that the energy needed to perform alchemy came from within the body and that equivalent exchange was arbitrary. It was all still new and purely theoretical, but those first steps showed promise.

"Perhaps..." Alphonse started. He hesitated when Edward's feline eyes looked up at him curiously. "You know...Mustang is funding some researchers. They have this interesting hypothesis that-"

"Don't think about that, Al," Edward impatiently waved him off. "I don't need that. I'm done with searching for the impossible. I accomplished what I wanted. That's it. Everything is okay."

'But everything is not okay,' Alphonse wanted to argue, but he wisely remained quiet and only gave a quiet 'hmm.' It frustrated him that Edward never fully opened up. Many thought the only person Edward would show any vulnerability with was Alphonse, but he guarded his feelings even with his little brother.

Alphonse watched Edward pick up a pen and casually scribble a note next to the aforementioned array. He immediately understood why Edward wanted to adjust the original design just by watching the scrawled notes in the margins. He then noticed how Edward seemed to struggle to hold the pen, which made his writing come out scratchy and uneven.

"We can work on this together," Alphonse said when Edward put the pen down with an annoyed huff and tried to stretch his fingers. "You can do the mathematics and I can execute them. It will be like old times."

"That might be nice," Edward mumbled noncommittally. Alphonse wasn't even sure Edward was actually listening. Edward's gaze was distant, not quite seeing what was in front of him, but remaining only minimally aware.

Edward set the book down and picked up another one. "This book is on Discordian Alchemy. Discordian is the opposite of Amestran. It pretty much says that equivalent exchange is bullshit." Edward chuckled. "Might be worth our time."

That did sound interesting. "Quite possibly."

"Remember how we talked about travelling the world and learning about the different styles of alchemy?" Edward asked, flipping through the pages. "Alkahestry and Alchemy are the two major philosophies, but there are several dozens more. This author..." Edward pointed to the author biography at the front of the book. "He argues that what we call 'alchemy' in Amestrian is actually a modern application of the alchemy practiced in Xerxes. Alchemy is just an umbrella term for dozens of styles and theories. He calls our style Modern Xerxian Alchemy."

"That does sound really cool," Alphonse had to agree. "Maybe you could become a scholar and analyze these different theories and come up with your own?"

Edward huffed. "I don't have the patience to be a professor. I learn better by doing, not reading about other people."

Edward paused for a long time and then finally continued in a slow, wistful voice. "I thought I'd be happy to finally settle down. At least, I liked the idea. But I dreamed of exploring the world and experiencing the things I missed as a kid." He set the book down with finality. "But it's too late now."

"It's never too late," Alphonse picked the book back up and placed it closer to his brother. "There is always a way. That's what we always said."

Edward smiled at him sadly. "Yes...we did…"

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"Al…"

"Ahl…"

"Faw…"

"Fha"

"Nse…"

"Enz...:"

"Alphonse…"

"Ahl-Fahnz…"

"Good!" Alphonse smiled and gave Montagu another cookie. The gutteral noises the wraith made were finally showing some semblance of human speech. So far, Montagu would only say Alphonse's name or his own. That was two words after three hours of coaxing. They were making good progress.

Much like Edward, Montagu bored very quickly. Unless Alphonse bribed him with food, Montagu saw no problem in getting into mischief. Alphonse lengthened the tarp that bound the wraith to the wall so he had room to stand and stretch his legs. Immediately, the wraith decided it was a good idea to grab some of the bottles and miscellaneous tools on the shelves with loud clanks. When Alphonse tried to stop him, he only growled until Alphonse had no choice but to back away until he was done. Alphonse could only keep Montagu's attention with treats or finding something novel to show him.

Watching Montagu focus on whatever trinket he found left Alphonse uneasy. His expressions and mannerisms increasingly reflected that of Edward - or maybe Alphonse was just projecting because the wraith was an exact copy of his late brother. He honestly didn't know. Any attempts to remain neutral and regard this thing as an empty shell were increasingly difficult as this creature showed more and more signs of having its own personality and temperament.

It made Alphonse worry. The thought of this being some random soul dragged back from the Gate became more plausible. Just as likely, Montagu could be just a fancily created homunculus and would eventually develop some kind of mutant power like the others. The more he thought about it, the less Alphonse believed that this was just some mindless container.

A growl from Montagu alerted Alphonse to Hohenheim's presence. Right on cue, the door creaked open and his father's imposing figure entered. Hohenheim paused at the scene they made. Montagu crouched behind Alphonse while the latter regarded Hohenheim with cold indifference.

"You two are getting along," Hohenheim observed.

"He's more manageable when he's given something to do," Alphonse explained.

"Ah-fonz?" Montagu questioned, shifting to be more next to Alphonse than behind. He stared at Hohenheim but made no other movements or sounds.

Hohenheim looked surprised. "You taught it to speak?"

"He can only say my name and his own," Alphonse reached back to pat Montagu's forearm. The wraith grew more agitated when Hohenheim was near. Another reminder of Edward.

"Ah-fonz…" Montagu murmured with a frown.

Hohenheim was disapproving. "You shouldn't do that. Allowing its consciousness to grow will make it harder to bind Edward's soul to the body. Gaining self-awareness will ruin any chance of binding Edward to the body. There won't be any room."

"That's no reason to treat it like an object," Alphonse countered. "It's still a living creature."

Hohenheim wrinkled his nose and gave an annoyed huff. "You set yourself up for failure with your sentimentality. It looks like your brother, but remember it is still a container."

Alphonse looked back at Montagu. Even if Hohenheim was right, he couldn't think of it as an object. The wraith showed intelligence and alertness. It wasn't some mindless mannequin.

"Have you thought about what you will offer your brother?"

Alphonse hesitated. He honestly didn't know what he could offer to Edward to make him return. "I don't know…"

"Nothing?" Hohenheim pressed, arms crossed.

"I don't know what Edward could want…" Alphonse whispered. "I never knew what he wanted. He was always concerned for me - and sometimes others. He said he only wanted to see my body returned, but nothing more. After the Promised Day, he seemed...lost. He had this...wanderlust that left him anxious. He and I both thought that domestic life would bring us happiness. But for Edward...It was like he lost his energy."

"That sounds like him," Hohenheim replied. "I saw in him a charge that a simple housewife and home couldn't bring him. I was similar at his age. The thought of a domestic life held no appeal for me. It felt more like a prison than a home."

"I can see…" Alphonse whispered. Edward never seemed like the type to just settle down and get a normal job. The thrill of the chase and the pursuits of more were at the core of what drove his brother. Domestic life couldn't give him that. Even if Edward insisted otherwise. It was the main reason Edward and Winry's relationship never blossomed. She wanted a husband. Edward wanted freedom.

"He didn't want to give up his freedom," Alphonse said, glancing back at the wraith who just watched them in silence.

"He spent his life in chains," Hohenheim stated.

Alphonse looked up. "What do you mean?"

"Edward's existence never went beyond you or the Philosopher's Stone. When that was fulfilled, he had nothing left." Hohenheim moved to place a hand on Alphonse's shoulder. Montagu growled, but Hohenheim ignored him. "Keep thinking. It will come to you. No one knows Edward better than you."

"I'm not so sure…" Alphonse whispered.

"Don't worry," Hohenheim paused as a memory came to him. "By the way, a telegram came for you at the hotel. It's from Winry. That's the entire reason I came. The receptionist said it was urgent and you were to call her as soon as possible."

"Damn!" Alphonse hissed. In the couple of weeks he was in this bizarre situation, he completely forgot about his fiance. He didn't even think to call or send a message to assure her all was well. Because all wasn't well, but how would he explain that? He knew Winry would be irate.

Alphonse stumbled to his feet, mumbling an apology to the wraith when he roughly bumped into it. Montagu just humphed and went back to his corner. He check to make sure Montagu was still bound as he still didn't trust it wouldn't attack Hohenheim. He mumbled a goodbye and rushed out to hopefully save himself from a harsh fate.

Alphonse managed to remember one more thing before he left. "Don't bother him," he ordered sternly at his father. And then he was gone.

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It was alone. With him. With the man.

This man. It didn't trust him. Not like how it trusted the other man. Ah-fonz- Alphonse. It didn't like the way this man looked at him.

Pulled from the darkness. Searing pain. No thoughts. No memories. This man twisted it into something. It didn't know. It hurt. It felt the bones and flesh twisting and reforming. Tissues torn from its bones. Its skin burned. It screamed. The man just watched. A sadistic gleam. He wanted it to hurt.

A gentle smile. Wide brown eyes. It had to escape. The man yelled after it. It disappeared. It didn't want to feel the burning pain again. It was all it knew, but it wanted the pain to stop. Broken glass. Blood. Everything hurt. It couldn't get the bleeding to stop. A shard was driven deep in the skin. It had to stop. Find a way to make it stop.

The brown-eyed man found him. Gentle. Smiling. It didn't feel in danger, but remained cautious.

"Let me take a look. I can fix it."

He touched him. The pain was sharp. It snarled. The brown-eyed man stepped back. Sweet. Calm.

"It's okay. I won't hurt you. Everything is alright."

He fixed it. The bleeding stopped. It felt safe. It felt like this person could be trusted. This person loved it. But it didn't know who he was. The man came back. It felt they were in danger. This man brought suffering. Heartbreak. He hurt them before. He made them suffer. It didn't know how or why, but he did. It had to make him stay away.

"Ah-fonz…"

"Alphonse will be back," The man said, he tried to sound comforting, but it made its blood run cold. It backed away, showing his teeth. Don't come near. Stay away.

It remembered something. This man was someone it wanted to be like, wanted to emulate in every way possible. A genius. A prodigy. No one could do what he could and the connection they shared would bring immense knowledge. But then everything went wrong. It lost everything and it was the man's fault. This man brought pain where he went. No matter what, it could never forgive him.

He didn't stay away. The man came closer. Another growl. It was ignored. "Ah-fonz!"

"Calm down…"

It didn't calm down. It couldn't. Not with this danger in front of it. It felt angry. Betrayed. This man betrayed him. Betrayed him many times over and then some. For many years. He said he loved it, but it was all lies. The growls turned into shrieks. A clap and then bright light. Its hands were bound. It was slammed to the floor and twisted onto his back. It was dragged into the center of the floor - the circle. The circle… it should know what it was, the meaning, but it didn't know.

Where was the brown-eyed man? Did he abandon it? The way the two men spoke seemed like he went to fetch something. Maybe return with more food. The old man tricked him. He wouldn't leave it like this. It could see in his eyes. This bastard tricked him into leaving so he could hurt it more.

Its limbs were stretched. Anger mixed with fear. No! Not again! It hurt too much! Where was -

"Ah-fonz!"

A shove. "Quiet!" Then the man paused and leaned back.

"You always hated me," the man whispered. "No matter what I did. You decided you would hate me until the end. Reason and logic meant nothing. The greater good meant nothing. You swore to hate me until your last breath. You were the only one who understood that I could never be forgiven. It don't stop me from trying."

The binds tightened. The man leaned closer. "I'm doing this for you. This will make everything right. You will have what you always wanted."

The man stood and moved to the edge of the circle. His struggle renewed. The man just watched. "I could cure every illness on the planet and you would still never forgive me. You were too immersed in your anger and pain. I understand. But it's still frustrating. And you did it to yourself."

It didn't know what the man meant. It left him scared and angry. This-this delusional selfishness. It dripped from every word. He didn't deserve forgiveness - not now and not ever. He couldn't be forgiven because he didn't understand forgiveness. Forgiveness wasn't an equivalent exchange. No tangible act to be equivalent to forgiveness. There is nothing equal to forgiveness or love - or hate.

"If this doesn't work then I'll just repurpose it for Sixteen…Sixteen deserves another life more than you."

Bound, he could only watch as the man retrieved an ornate dagger from his coat. A candle was lit. He held the blade over the flame. A hiss. The man returned and the fear increased when the hot tip brushed his chest.

"Ah-fonz!" it screamed as it bucked against the floor. "Ah-fonz!"

'Help me!'

The sound of searing flesh. It screamed again, reaching pitches that were inhuman. The old man remained cold, holding it still as the array was carved into his chest.

And yet, it wasn't surprising. It was even expected. The man thought he was helping, but all it did was hurt. But the man didn't know. He didn't see. He didn't understand just how he hurt others - hurt it. He wanted their forgiveness, but he did nothing to earn it. He didn't acknowledge why he should be forgiven. He never gave a reason. He just wanted their pity.

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'That went well,' Alphonse thought grimly as he made his way back to the warehouse.

He tried to make up some half-assed story to keep Winry from freaking out but it didn't do much. He told her that Hohenheim wanted his assistance with some alchemical experiment in human physiology. His first mistake was saying 'human.' He should've practiced before talking with her. She went into a tirade about how he was stupid to allow his father to 'use him again!' Her rants was interspersed with warning after warning about how Hohenheim was a sorry manipulator who preyed on Alphonse and Edward's need for a father.

"Al, please! You idiot!' she yelled into the phone and made his ears ring. "Just let him go! He doesn't give one shit about you and never will!"

"It's more than that, Win," Alphonse tried to reason, but she cut him off.

"What's more?" she demanded. "What are you doing?!"

"I...I can't explain. He's - he's trying this new secret alchemical theory and it takes two alchemists and-"

"What. Are. You. Helping. Him. Do!?" She snarled. "What is he making you do?"

Alphonse had no idea how to explain the harebrained scheme to resurrect his brother. Any sane person would've learned their lesson the first time, especially after what they went through to rectify their mistakes. It was pure idiocy and arrogance.

"He said Edward left behind unfinished business," Alphonse tried to bring his story back on track. "He wants to...accomplish this in honor of Brother's memory."

"What business, Alphonse Elric?!" Winry was exasperated. She clearly didn't like that Alphonse was making her beat around the bush. "Why are you hiding things from me?"

He was hiding the fact that she could never fill the void left behind by Edward. As much as he loved Winry, any thoughts of a future were tainted by the fact that he couldn't share it with Edward. He didn't want Winry to truly know the extent of his codependency. He and Edward were glued to each other's sides for so long that to look and not see his brother next to him left Alphonse disoriented and empty.

He was well-aware that Hohenheim was manipulating him. But he would be lying if there wasn't a part of him that wanted to believe he could have his brother back with little or no cost. Maybe it was...Maybe it was Alphonse's deep yearning for his brother's company masked as misguided avarice.

He picked up his pace. He didn't like that he left Hohenheim alone with the wraith. He knew his father would try something.

He made it to the warehouse. He quickly made his way into the darkness. He froze when he heard a distinct scream echoing from the Montagu's room. He ran until he burst through the door to protect the creature. He found Montagu pinned to the floor in the center of an elaborate transmutation circle. He caught the scent of burning flesh and the brandmark on the wraith's chest.

"What the hell did you do?!" he shouted and he fell to his knees to calm the creature. "Are you insane!?"

The wraith made a pitiful keening noise and tried to shift closer to Alphonse. Alphonse looked up at his father who remained cold standing to the side of the circle.

"It is time to perform the transmutation," was the only explanation Hohenheim gave.

The wraith tried to move closer to Alphonse. "This has gone too far, Hohenheim!" Alphonse glared at his father. "I can't let you do this!"

"And then what?" Hohenheim remained unaffected. "What becomes of it?"

What was left of Alphonse's temper fizzled. "I know why Edward hated you! You are an arrogant, cold-hearted, narcissistic bastard of a man! I just - I can't find words to describe how absolutely disgusting I think you are! This need to play God and this obscene idea of rectifying your mistakes is just….it's horrid!"

"Don't raise your voice at me!" Hohenheim growled, standing his imposing figure above Alphonse. "And why are you here? That same need to be God. You failed to bring back your mother and lost your body. And yet, here you are trying to circumvent fate because of the small chance to see your brother again. "

"Edward was all I had!" Alphonse broke down. "Mother was all I had! You left! You left us with nothing. I watched my mother die and then my brother's body eviscerated to save my life. You were never there for us! I don't care what your excuses are. You were never there!"

"What do you want me to do then?!" Hohenheim also lost the last of his composure. "What could I possibly do to right the wrong of my past!? I've given you my knowledge and helped you save Amestris from total destruction. I've tried countless times to become a better part of your life, but you still rejected every attempt I made. You could never understand the Truth and what it takes to understand. It is obvious you and brother can't exist without each other. I'm fixing a fate that should never have happened."

"When did we ask you to fix anything!?" Alphonse argued. "That's where you keep messing up. You look down on others when your efforts are rejected! We can see right through them! You were only a part of our lives when it was convenient for you or it was 're so sanctimonious that you can't be bothered to ask how you can seek forgiveness. "

"Even if I did, I see now that it's fruitless," Hohenheim hissed. "Asking you now how to earn your forgiveness is futile because it's clear you've already decided."

"You can earn my forgiveness by leaving and never coming back," Alphonse said vehemently. "You can act like you never existed."

"And what will you do now, Alphonse?" Hohenheim asked coldly, pointing to the wraith. "You brought this creature into existence. It's fate lies in your hands."

"Don't you dare put this on me!" Alphonse started to yell, but Hohenheim interrupted.

"I have no use for it," Hohenheim said. "If you leave now, I will simply put it out of its misery."

Alphonse looked between Hohenheim and the scared face of the wraith. He felt both fear and anger at his father's open manipulation. He knew he was being tricked. If he left now, he would damn this poor thing to a horrible fate. If he stayed...

He looked down at the wraith. It stared up at him with those golden eyes. It's face a perfect mirror of Edward. But it was softer, pleading. It was scared and looked to him for protection. It was a soulless body. The more he looked at it, the less he could separate it from his brother. There would be no justice for this wraith nor for Edward.

Alphonse slumped. There was no winning. He couldn't in good conscience leave this thing to whatever fate his father planned. However, what would he do with it? Such a thing would bring about scrutiny and danger. But maybe he could buy time and find a loophole of sorts. He came too far and no matter how he saw it, he still held some, if not all, of the responsibility for this thing's fate. He still had a chance to turn things around in his favor. He just needed another way.

"Fine…" Alphonse gave in grudgingly. He avoided the wraith's wide eyes. "There's no turning back now. I miss my brother and if I can get away with this - which you believe that I can, I will go through with it."

"Is that your final decision?" Hohenheim calmed into stony neutrality.

"Yes…" Alphonse returned the stare without budging.

'Just hang on, Brother. I'll find a way out.'

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Alphonse sat next to the wraith, storking its hair to keep it calm while Hohenheim made the final preparations.

"I'm so sorry you had to be dragged into this," he said to the wraith. "I don't know what or who you are but you don't deserve this."

The wraith just groaned. The strong sedative was kicking in. It leaned into Alphonse's touch with a heavy sigh.

If this didn't work, Alphonse would find a home for this thing. He had to keep it away from the military and mad scientists. Perhaps, he could teach it to be independent. If it continued to gain self-awareness, he could maybe teach it a trade. He just knew that whatever fate had for this creature, he would see that such a fate was as painless as possible. It was his duty.

"It's ready…"

Alphonse stood. The circle waited for him. In the center he could see the drawing of the reptilian eye that watched from behind the gate. Even as a drawing it still left him feeling afraid. But the blind fear he once had when looking into the Eye had dulled from his years of being trapped inside the Gate. He regarded it with cautious respect and swore to never come near it again.

'Yet, here I am…'

"Alright," he murmured, standing up and awaiting instructions.

"Have you thought of what to offer your brother?" Hohenheim asked before getting tino place.

"I...have an idea, but it might not work," Alphonse still didn't know, but it was too late to say now.

Hohenheim just told him to hold still and envision the gate. Reluctantly, he did. The familiar chills came quickly as the room erupted in that damned blue and and Alphonse was blinded.

When Alphonse opened his eyes again, it was that same white void that haunted his dreams.

He looked around. It was as he remembered. A void that robbed him of his senses. He couldn't smell, hear, touch, taste - his ability to see remained in question as there was nothing to look at. It was all just white.

He took a deep breath. The void absorbed the sound. He didn't know what to do from this point. He decided to just wait. It didn't take too long.

"You again…"

That white silhouette wreathed in a grey halo appeared before Alphonse in its usual cross-legged position. That same devious grin on its eyeless face made Alphonse nearly run screaming. It was such a small unassuming thing and yet, it held so much power and cruelty. To this day, he had no idea what to call It. It was something that went beyond the tangible and remained nameless.

"It's okay to talk…" Truth smirked. "What brings you here this time? I was actually starting to miss you."

"I'm here…" Alphonse started awkwardly. His voice sounded like he was speaking into a pillow. It sounded so dull that he could barely make out what he was saying. He gathered himself and spoke as clearly as possible. "I'm here to speak to my brother, Edward Elric."

"Really?" the condescending tone picked at Alphonse's patience. "How do you plan to do that? He returned to the void a long time ago. His existence is indistinguishable from the millions of others."

"He will come to me," Alphonse insisted. "I'm here to ask him to return to our world."

If the Truth had eyebrows, one would be raised. "You're here to ask? That's new. I would assume such a powerful alchemist wouldn't need manners for his transmutations."

"I'm not transmuting anything," Alphonse said, daring to step closer. "I'm not forcing my brother to do anything he won't consent to. I'm here to give him another chance at life."

"Well...that's a new approach…" The Truth was bemused. "But after all your brother suffered, surely there is more peace inside the Gate? What could possibly make him want to return?"

"His family…"

The Truth huffed impatiently. "Pfft! He had a family and look what good it did him. It didn't stop the absolute hell that made up his life. How many times had he escaped death all because he was trying to help some needy idiot - or you? His foolish guilt was the only thing keeping him alive."

"We promised to always be together!" Alphonse insisted. "We swore to each other that we would never leave each other's side!"

The Truth snorted. "Has anyone pointed out just how creepy your brotherly love is? There are rumors…"

Alphonse wasn't going to let it distract him. "I'm here to see my brother and speak to him - not you!"

"Even if you think that gaining your brother's consent to return to that abomination of a creature will absolve you of the Gate's toll, then you are stupid." the Truth said flatly.

"I understand," Alphonse said carefully. "But I choose what to sacrifice."

"Hmm?" the Truth was amused. "What if I don't want it?"

"Then we can negotiate. But I won't let you arbitrarily pick a sacrifice from me," Alphonse remained steadfast.

"I see…" it said contemplatively. "Then what do you think is equivalent to passing through the Gate to find your brother? It still must be paid even if you fail. Your brother retains the right to say no, but the toll remains."

"I'll decide when-"

"You pay it now," Truth interrupted. "I know you have something. I don't have time for coyness."

His fist clenched and unclenched. He hoped it wouldn't come to this. "The wraith...it has its own mind. I can give you that."

The Truth sat back in mild surprise. "I never thought you the type to sacrifice a living creature. I always thought you were the sweet brother."

"It's a vessel with its own mind," saying that sentence disgusted him. "It's life is of some value."

For a moment, it looked like the Truth would disagree. But then, Alphonse felt its eyeless gaze drill into him, searching for any sign of insincerity. Images of the wraith and Edward passed through his mind as if someone was flipping through a photo album. Seemingly satisfied, the Truth shifted to make itself more comfortable. "I suppose that'll have to do." It waved and with a loud, metallic groan, the Gate appeared behind it.

Alphonse tried to suppress the shudders when the Gate loomed above him. The ornate carvings of times past were just as he remembered. Another groan, the Gate opened. Alphonse stepped back instinctively. He couldn't help it. If he got too close, it might drag him in. The center eye opened and Alphonse tried not to scream. It was so evil to look at and embodied every fear known to man. It was a place no mortal belonged. The Eye narrowed at him.

"Go ahead," The Truth said casually. "He's in there somewhere. Hopefully, he'll recognize you." When Alphonse gave a confused look, the Truth sighed. "Death changes things. He might not be what you remember."

Going against every survival instinct, Alphonse dragged his feet to take him into the Gate. He got the the edge of the black abyss and dozens more eyes appeared to stare at him in mild curiosity. He looked at each one, vainly hoping he would recognize his brother's eyes, but they all looked the same.

"Edward Elric?" He tried to call out.

"Family names mean nothing here, Alchemist," the Truth said annoyedly, but he explained no further.

A shaky breath. Alphonse tried again. "Edward? Brother?"

The small eyes faded into the blackness. Alphonse finally gathered enough bravery to step inside. He stayed inside the pool of light leaking from the void. He ventured until he reached the very edge, but he couldn't make himself go any further. A few eyes appeared when he called. They floated around him. They waited.

"Edward' is a common name," the Truth mocked. Alphonse wanted to tell it to be quiet, but he wouldn't dare turn his attention away.

The eyes all watched him. For a moment, Alphonse wanted to just give up, tell his father to go fuck himself, and never come back. His arms and knees were shaking and he was forcing himself to breathe evenly. His mind raced. He tried to make sense of his thoughts so he could think of the one thing that would help him find his brother among the hundreds of eyes.

It came to him. It wasn't foolproof. But it was the only thing that he could think of.

"Edward? Frater? Illic es?"

The eyes whittled down to just a few who could understand the long dead language. But there were still too many.

Alphonse raised his voice slightly, watching the eyes. "Ego sum frater tuus, Alphonse. Et venerunt ad te."

Still too many. Alphonse grinded his teeth. This wasn't working. What could make the eyes decrease? He thought for a moment. Nothing came to him. Maybe if he asked a question.

"Ubi enim germinare?"

A few more disappeared. Only a dozen remained. Alphonse swore under his breath.

"You do have other relatives…" Truth pointed out sarcastically. "Grandparents are a thing, you know."

"I said be quiet!" Alphonse didn't care that he was yelling at what was technically God.

"Just thought I'd point it out," Truth shrugged.

Alphonse thought of another question. This will definitely whittle them down. "Habeo originis nota. Ubi est?

Only six disappeared. Damn. He tried again. "Quid enim tamquam?"

Now there were four. Alphonse guessed one was his mother and two were his maternal grandparents who likely recognized him. His father's grandparents wouldn't know who he was. But something was off. Someone was off.

"Numquid non in ventre aut pedem meum?" Two pairs of eyes remained. Alphonse had to be looking at his mother and Edward. It was so very chilling. He wanted to reach out and see if they would reach back, but he didn't. There was a sinister aura about them that made him step back. He knew his mother only spoke the bare minimum of Xerxian. He would have to speak more fluently.

An idea - a memory - came to him. "Alchimia chao, quod est equivalent ad commutationem habeat opinionem valere non potest. Est illusio. Nihil mutandum sacrificare solum quoad perceptionem re dubitatio. Hoc est verum?"

One pair of eyes remained. Alphonse bit back the surge of excitement. It worked! The only people who could speak Xerxian were bound inside his father! And only his family would know. But only Edward knew of this alchemy.

"Edward? Frater? Est tibi?" His voice came out tight. Every muscles was tensed.

"Etiam…" A voice rumbled in the darkness. It sounded like two voices speaking at once in perfect sync. He thought recognized his brother's voice. But it sounded wrong.

Alphonse couldn't decide if he was frightened out of his mind or just numb. The voice came from everywhere around him and he felt vulnerable. It left him quivering. He calmed himself and tried to speak s confidently as possible. "Ego sum venire ad vos revertetur ad me petere. Illic est adeo exspectat."

"Nihil enim in me…Non fuit ibi"

Alphonse expected this. He gasped for the only straw he could think of. "Est! Tu aliquando viderat iter orbis terrarum nova inveniendi via alchimiae. Redire potuimus invenire viam tuam alchimia!"

Heavy silence. The ghost spoke. "Hinc possum invenire…"

"Non se vigilare. Et dixerunt ipsum." Alphonse insisted. "Quod non est verum. Nonne ea quae sunt ad te, et tu eras magna? Nemo potest facere quae tu facis."

"Obsequium non arguere me. Hanc vitam duxit me dolor. Ego hic in pace." The voice was cold.

Alphonse bit back a sob. Now that it was actually possible, he didn't want to give up. He had to think of something. "Quid mea promissa? Levavi manum meam ut non relinquam vobis Non possum hic si fidem!"

"Est promissum tuum. Non est meum." The voice was cold and flat. Alphonse could feel the spirit he hoped was his brother turning away from him. He was dismayed at the dismissal.

"Frater! Te desidero! Quod dabo tibi. Porta pretium est scriptor theloneo. Et ego dabo vobis quid quaeris!" Alphonse pleaded.

That was it. He didn't have anything else. He could think of nothing that would convince Edward to return. He had no idea what could convince Edward - this spirit to return. What would be the one thing that Edward would ask of his little brother?

"That life brought me pain…" It's words echoed in Alphonse's mind.

Pain. Alphonse could understand. Not once did her ever see Edward truly happy. He saw every wound and scar laid on Edward's overexerted body. He watched his brother slowly die from years of physical and mental torture. He thought of the enemies who tried to kill them - kill him and Edward always stopped them from hurting his Alphonse. But then, Edward took the most of the pain and Alphonse could only watch in guilt and helplessness. All Edward did was suffer at the hands of others.

The hands of others...their enemies.

"Et ulciscar ultionem tuam!" Alphonse promised.

There was a heavy silence. Alphonse could feel the spirit contemplating his offer. He didn't want to, but that was the reality. A life for his brother's life. An equivalent exchange.

"Et ulciscatur me Dominus. Et in unum eligere adducere. Et non morieris in manibus meis," the cold voice said to Alphonse's relief and anxiety. "Ergo tantum reddet tibi."

"Ita, Frater …" Alphonse said without hesitation. He knew what Brother wanted.

Alphonse exited the Gate. the Truth was waiting for him with a malicious grin. He heard everything.

"So I guess you'll be on your way?" He sounded too eager to see this unfold.

"I will…"

The Truth waved his hand. Another gate appeared. Without hesitation, Alphonse stepped through the portal with the vengeful spirit behind him.

* * * * * * * * * * * * GOLEM * * * * * * * * * * * *

There was another flash of blinding light. Alphonse was kneeling in the center of the circle. He looked up to see Hohenheim staring at him expectantly.

"Did it work?" Hohenheim asked. "Are you alright?"

"Yes…" Alphonse said slowly, standing up from the floor. He turned to see the wraith still lying in its back, eyes closed and in a deep sleep.

"What did you offer Edward?"

"What we always wanted…" Alphonse whispered, watching the wraith begin to stir.

Hohenheim eyebrows furrowed. His gaze broke when the wraith made a growl and awoke. Alphonse remained still while the wraith sat up with a groan and looked around sluggishly. Its eyes became alert when it recognized Hohenheim and it grinned cruelly. Both Alphonse and Hohenheim could sense the rejuvenated consciousness.

Alphonse blankly watched his father's face turn white. "Alphonse...what did you do?" Hohenheim shouted.

Alphonse just stepped aside to give the wraith more space. "I gave him what he wanted." He glared at his father. "What we all wanted."

Sensing the impending danger, Hohenheim tried to transmute a bind for both of them. But Alphonse beat him to it and he trapped Hohenheim in a stone hand. Alphonse quietly approached until he was face to face with his father. He took a sick pleasure in seeing his usually stoic father look frightened. Alphonse just watched him, their gazes met and neither wavered.

"What did you offer him?" Hohenheim growled. He looked past Alphonse when the wraith made a loud cackling noise. It lurked in the dim light and then slinked up to stand behind Alphonse. It looked at its prey with a malicious glee.

"What we all wanted," Alphonse repeated, shifting the stone binds until more of his father's body was exposed. The wraith grunted in appreciation and stood beside Alphonse. It then sauntered up to Hohenheim. It grinned impossibly wider.

"Death changes people," Alphonse said, dreamily watching the wraith. "Only the rawest of emotions remains. And the darker they are, the more they stain whatever was good about the person."

"Alphonse!" Hohenheim growled. "How dare you!? I did this for you."

Alphonse sneered. So did the wraith. "It was never about us. It was always about you. It's always about you." Alphonse walked until he stood in the corner, aloof and missing the wide-eyed sweetness he was known for. Completely detached and free of any sympathy.

Hohenheim watched the wraith crawl up to him. It gave a low inhuman chuckle when it came within inches of his face. Its grin was frighteningly identical to the Truth's.

"Ego enim dabo tibi reddere tibi causa doloris nobis, Hohenheim," it's voice was coarse and demonic. This thing wasn't human. "Bastardis."

Realization came to Hohenheim. He looked into mismatched eyes. "Edward….Sedecim!"

"Non est nobis," The wraith laughed and with unbridled excitement tore into Hohenheim's chest.

Alphonse watched. The gore didn't bother him as much as he thought. He had seen enough violence and blood to render him unmoved, even if it was his own father being ripped apart by some dybbuk dragged from the abyss. He didn't do anything. This was his father's fate.

Hohenheim tried not to scream. Tried to preserve his pride. But after a few minutes his pained grunts turned into full out wails when the wraith tore into muscle with its bare hands. Amidst his father's screams where the crazed yells of the wraith that sounded like there were others in the room. It was by pure strength it could tear into the dense muscle of Hohenheim's abdomen. But it wasn't in a hurry.

Some blood splattered on Alphonse's face. He casually wiped it off. The wraith's sadism was affecting him. It felt good to have someone suffer an unfair and cruel fate for once. He wanted someone to truly understand the absolute torment he and his brother endured for their entire childhood. They saw and experienced things no children should and the world just let them rot. He wanted his father to understand just how what did and why he could never have their forgiveness. He watched this thing laugh in pleasure as Hohenheim made his last chokes. He watched his father grasp at the air as blood filled his throat and oozed out of the hole made in his trachea. Alphonse smirked.

The wraith took its time. Hohenheim's flailing arms died into pitiful convulsions. He drowned in his own blood. Still, the wraith tore at what was left of him. It would make him suffer until the final moment. Finally, Hohenheim went still. The wraith licked at his blood. Satisfied.

The wraith spun on its heel to hurry up to Alphonse. Without hesitation, it grabbed his head and planted a bloody kiss at the corner of his mouth. It wrapped its arms around him and cooed. Alphonse hugged it back, stroking blood-stained hair. The wraith pulled away with a sharky grin.

"Alphonse," it said clearly.

Alphonse nodded. "Let's go home..." he stepped over his father's disemboweled body.

* * * * * * * * * * * * GOLEM * * * * * * * * * * * *

END

* * * * * * * * * * * * GOLEM * * * * * * * * * * * *

Gate scene translated:

"Edward? Brother? Are you there?"

The eyes whittled down to just a few who could understand the long dead language. But there were still too many.

Alphonse raised his voice slightly, watching the eyes. "I am your brother, Alphonse. I have come for you."

Still too many. Alphonse grinded his teeth. This wasn't working. What could make the eyes decrease? He thought for a moment. Nothing came to him. Maybe if he asked a question.

"Where did we grow up?"

A few more disappeared. Only a dozen remained. Alphonse swore under his breath.

"You do have other relatives…" Truth pointed out sarcastically. "Grandparents are a thing, you know."

"I said be quiet!" Alphonse didn't care that he was yelling at what was technically God.

"Just thought I'd point it out," Truth shrugged.

Alphonse thought of another question. This will definitely whittle them down. "I have a birthmark. Where is it?

Only six disappeared. Damn. He tried again. "What does it look like?"

"Is it on my stomach or my foot?" Two pairs of eyes remained. Alphonse had to be looking at his mother and Edward. It was so very chilling. He wanted to reach out and see if they would reach back, but he didn't. There was a sinister aura about them that made him step back. He knew his mother only spoke the bare minimum of Xerxian. He would have to speak more fluently.

An idea - a memory - came to him. ""Discordian alchemy is the belief that equivalent exchange has no meaning. It is an illusion. There is nothing to sacrifice as it is only changing the perception of the matter in question. Is this true?"

"Edward? Brother? Is it you?" His voice came out tight. Every muscles was tensed.

"Yes…" A voice rumbled in the darkness. It sounded like two voices speaking at once in perfect sync. He thought recognized his brother's voice. But it sounded wrong.

Alphonse couldn't decide if he was frightened out of his mind or just numb. The voice came from everywhere around him and he felt vulnerable. It left him quivering. He calmed himself and tried to speak s confidently as possible. "I have come to ask you to return with me. There's so much waiting for you."

"There is nothing there for me. There never was."

Alphonse expected this. He gasped for the only straw he could think of. "There is! You dreamed of traveling the world and discovering new types of alchemy. We could find a way to return your alchemy!"

Heavy silence. The ghost spoke. "I can discover from here…"

"You were never a watcher! You had to do things yourself." Alphonse insisted. "That's not true! You had to do things yourself and you were great at it! No one could do what you could!"

"Flattery won't convince me. That life brought me pain. I am at peace here." The voice was cold.

Alphonse bit back a sob. Now that it was actually possible, he didn't want to give up. He had to think of something. "What of my promise? I promised I would never leave you. I can't fulfill the promise if you're not here!"

"It was your promise. Not mine." The voice was cold and flat. Alphonse could feel the spirit he hoped was his brother turning away from him. He was dismayed at the dismissal.

"Please, Brother! I miss you! I will give you anything. The Gate's toll is paid. I will give you what you ask for!" Alphonse pleaded.

That life brought me pain…

The hands of others...their enemies.

"I can avenge you!" Alphonse promised.

There was a heavy silence. Alphonse could feel the spirit contemplating his offer. He didn't want to, but that was the reality. A life for his brother's life. An equivalent exchange.

"You will avenge me. Bring the one I choose. He will die by my hand" the cold voice said to Alphonse's relief and anxiety. "Only then will I return."

"Yes, Brother …" Alphonse said without hesitation. He knew what Brother wanted.

Alphonse exited the Gate. the Truth was waiting for him with a malicious grin. He heard everything.

"So I guess you'll be on your way?" He sounded too eager to see this unfold.

"I will…"

The truth waved his hand. Another gate appeared. Without hesitation, Alphonse stepped through the portal with the vengeful spirit behind him.

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Thank you to everyone who read this fic! I had so much fun writing it. I loved using it to pretend I was working. :P

As stated in my other fics, I prefer to use already existing languages as it's easier and grounds the story in reality. Latin made sense as Xerxes resembles Ancient Rome. Alchemy was introduced to Latin Europe in the 15th century and has its roots in Hellenistic Egypt. So it made sense historically.

Obligatory author's note:

Thoughts on Hohenheim:

One of the many reasons I like Edward so much as a character is because he's so relatable. Particularly in his estranged relationship with his father. My parents split when I was 9 and they gave no reason why. My father just disappeared one day and my mother started saying terrible things about him. As a single parent, she struggled to support us and as the eldest, I became a pseudo parent to my siblings. I held a lot of resentment towards my father and we didn't reconnect until well into adulthood. But that unresolved resentment still lingers.

Hohenheim annoyed me as he seemed far too caught up in his martyrdom to truly understand just how he hurt his family. I keep getting the impression that he thinks Edward's lingering anger is immature and misguided. It's almost as if he thinks Edward owes him forgiveness, and when Edward refuses, he thinks he's the victim. And it was just as annoying when characters would push Edward to be kinder to his father, which is very ignorant and very similar things were said to me. I can tell you, it's insulting when people tell you how to think/feel when they have no idea how such an emotionally traumatizing could affect you.

Why would you expect forgiveness without understanding what it is you did to offend the person? Saying "I'm sorry" doesn't mean anything if you don't know or don't care about what you're sorry for.