Team RNJR had just escaped from Qrow's wrath (Don't ask what they did, it involved drinking out of his flask.)
"Oh my God that was close." Ruby gasped for breath. Team RNJR nodded and high-fived each other because why not.
Suddenly, Blake came sprinting out of the woods being chased by a very angry Weiss, shouting "How dare you call me a dolphin online, I'm clearly a lizard, you DOLT!"
Blake screamed and ran underneath Ren's hair for cover because it was secretly a shield.
Weiss hissed and ran over to Ruby.
"There you are, I've been worried sick. You would not believe what Blake did. If you'll excuse me." Weiss fired a round of dust at Blake who shrieked and hid behind a tree.
Ruby just watched everything with her mouth open. Then she looked at Weiss, confused "Wait, the CCT's down, how could you have known?"
Weiss smirked "I'm glad you asked. I have a secret informant. Salem, if you please."
A hooded figure appeared out of nowhere. She cackled and threw back her hood.
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! It was me all along!"
Everyone gasped.
Salem grinned. "That's right, I was secretly good all along!"
Everybody gasped again.
Salem laughed "Yes, but there's more!" She pulled off the mask to reveal… the face of Roman Torchwick! "Yes," Roman giggled "IT WAS ME, ROMAN TORCHWICK, THE WHOLE TIME!"
Everyone gasped once more.
"But, wait, there's more! While I was working for Ice Queen, I found out all your information and will now proceed to blow up the planet! Neo, if you please."
Neo nodded, and pressed the button. Everyone died. The END.
That was a thing. Leave a review with your crack-fic prompts because I haz writer's block. Yay! Just a warning, I'm taking Xmas day off, so no updates that day.
Cheese,
Tasie