Throwing Books and Sprouting Flowers

I cleared my throat, trying to think of something to say to my best friend. Were we still best friends? I really hoped we were. Neither of us had mentioned the scene in the common room last night. Alice woke me up this morning, telling me breakfast was already over and I shouldn't be late for class. I thanked her and she smiled, but I couldn't help feeling that something was different between us. Her smile didn't radiate sunshine like it normally did, even on the dreariest of days. Today it was reserved; strained almost. She waited for me to get dressed and I could sense her question of why I didn't wake up on my own, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to tell her about James' and my late night excursion. I was almost offended that she didn't wake me up for breakfast. That's what she would've done any other day. Now I was forced to sit in hunger until lunchtime. I pushed these thoughts from my mind and opened my mouth, ready to say anything to break the looming silence that was hovering between us.

I was interrupted by a male voice. My first thought was that it was James and my stomach gave a strange little shiver; then I saw the tall, slightly round faced boy that I knew as Frank Longbottom. He said, "Morning again, Miss Alice."

I stopped what I was saying, honoring the best friend code anyways—even if things were a little tense between Alice and me right now, I didn't want to do anything to make things even more unpleasant. Instead, I closed my mouth and stepped back a little ways, allowing her and Frank to have some private conversation. What I saw him do next almost made me fall over from shock.

I was already slightly off balance because of my lack of sleep. I had yawned precisely six times on the walk to Professor Slughorn's class. I slowed down, walking by myself now, and feeling even more alone than before in the crowded hallway. That's when I noticed his hand slip over hers. She turned her face toward him, her cheeks a bright pink color and then she shyly interlaced her fingers with his.

My eyes widened and I inhaled sharply. Is that what she had been doing outside the common room? Had she met Frank? I felt a soaring happiness for her, glad that she had gotten her wish to be with him. Almost immediately afterward however, my mood dropped. Why hadn't she told me? I felt a deadened sense of glee for her, hampered by my feeling of sadness. I was supposed to be her best friend…

Frank and Alice walked into class together, Alice turning to look at me helplessly for a split-second. I offered her what I hoped look like an encouraging smile and then trudged after them, turning scenarios between us over and over in my mind to see how I had upset her.

"Good morning, Lily," Professor Slughorn said, beaming down at me as I plodded past him.

"Morning, Professor," I said quietly, looking for an available table.

"Down in the dumps today?" he asked, frowning slightly.

I shrugged. "Yeah, somewhat, I suppose."

He grimaced. "Well, chin up there, and take a seat with a partner. We'll be brewing Optomorphus today."

"Oh, that's delightful."

In was in fact anything but delightful. My melancholy demeanor wasn't the mood to make a happiness potion. And to add to my misfortune, there were only two seats left. One next to James and one next to Sirius; the latter was glaring down at the floor. I sighed, casting a wistful glance at Alice who was watching me. We both looked away, and James caught my eye.

"Lily!" he shouted, waving a hand.

"Hi," I said wearily.

"Come on," he urged, gesturing to the seat next to him.

I took a deep breath and began to walk over to him, ready to chew him out for keeping me up so late last night, when a blonde blur raced towards him and slid into the seat reserved for me. James stared at the girl, who I recognized as Marlene McKinnon, in surprise as she batted her eyelashes at him.

"Er, sorry Mary—"

"It's Marlene," she said, smiling widely at him.

"Yeah, sorry—"

"No, its okay, you were close enough," she giggled.

I let out what some might classify as I guttural growl. This was not turning out to be my day.

"I was saving that seat for Lily," he protested, his brow creasing.

"Oh, but she's going to sit with someone else!"

He whipped his head toward me, and saw that I was indeed going to sit with Sirius. He opened his mouth to complain but right at that moment, Professor Slughorn stepped to the front of the class.

"Now," he said, clapping his pudgy hands together. "Who can explain to me what Optomorphus is?"

I raised my hand and Professor Slughorn grinned widely. "Lily?"

"Optomorphus is a potion purely for happiness. You inhale it and it brightens your day. If you drink it, it makes you delirious. Your parents could die and you'd still be grinning," I told him, trying to keep the frown from staying on my face.

He nodded, watching me intently. "Good thing we're brewing it," he said demurely. "Looks like you could use some."

I forced a grin. "No sir, I'm just tired." I shot a look at James who winked at me. Alice was watching me with her mouth slightly open, probably putting together the pieces in her mind.

"Well," Slughorn said, rubbing his overlarge belly. "Let's get to brewing. If you would please place your essays upon my desk, I'll get to grading them."

The class murmured their assent as he heaved himself into his chair and I turned to see Sirius gaping at me. "You'll never get a girl like that, Black," I teased, closing his mouth for him. "Why're you so surprised?"

"Why aren't you sitting with James?" he demanded angrily.

I rolled my eyes. "Sheesh, Marlene stole my spot."

"No," he began angrily. "Marlene stole my spot! He made me move and now you're not even sitting with him!"

"That's not my fault," I said, rolling my eyes. Just because Sirius didn't sit with his best mate he had to throw a tantrum.

"Yeah, it is Lily pad," Sirius scoffed. "You're the one that Jamesie's in love with."

I closed my eyes. "My name is Lily, not Lily pad," I growled at him.

He laughed, visibly perking up at the thought of annoying me. "Whatever you say…Lily pad."

"Stop it!"

He snorted and nudged me, gesturing over to where Marlene was fawning over James. "Bet you wish you hadn't come and sat with me, now…look at her, stealing your man right in front of your nose."

"Black!" I threw my scroll at his head and he caught it, chuckling.

"Here, let me be a good little boy and take your homework up to Ol' Sluggy."

"Yeah right, good little boy," I muttered under my breath, angrily flipping the pages to my Potions book.

A piece of parchment landed on my desk and I looked up in surprise, sweeping my eyes over the classroom to see who had thrown it. Nobody looked guilty. I looked down again and saw that it was a note scrawled in Alice's handwriting.

So, you can probably guess, huh?

"Guess what?" Sirius asked from behind me.

I jabbed my elbow into his stomach and he grunted, falling down into the seat next to mine. "Git," I mumbled as I hurriedly wrote back an answer.

If you mean guessing about you and Frank, then yes…when did it happen?

With a quick glance at Professor Slughorn to ensure that he was reading over our assignments, I whispered, "Wingardium Leviosa," and floated the note back to Alice.

She caught it and read over it, biting her lip nervously.

"How do we make Optomorsuck?" Sirius asked uninterestedly, leaning back in his chair.

"You mean Optomorphus?" I corrected him, looking over the ingredients carefully.

"No, I said what I meant, Lily pad," he smirked.

I scowled at him. "Oh wow, Black, you're so funny, my sides hurt from laughing so hard."

He laughed. "Yes, I do have that effect on some people."

"Sure you do; on people like Marlene. How abo—Ow!" The parchment had poked its sharp corner against my temple when I had failed to see it. I snatched it from the air irritably and opened it.

Yesterday while you were in the library.

"Wait, Alice and Frank?" Sirius gasped, his head peering over my shoulder.

"Hey—will you—quit it! Go get our ingredients!"

I sent a sulking Sirius over to the cabinet and as he began loading his arms full of items, I penned a reply and sent it back.

That's great! I'm so happy for you two!

A booming laugh from my professor rang throughout the class and I paused in my act of heating the cauldron.

"James, my boy! Your report isn't eerily similar to Remus' today! Congratulations!"

James grinned at him and said, "Yes well, I had a smart, beautiful, and perfect tutor, so it's natural that my work would improve."

Remus frowned, pretending to be offended and I smothered a giggle with my hand. A loud crash from the supply cupboard made me jump and I turned to see what Sirius had done now. He was hurriedly putting a scale back on its shelf, and then turned and came rushing to me. "You tutored James?" he hissed, shocked.

I picked a Houtish root from the mound of things in his arms and began cutting it up slowly. "I didn't say that."

He gasped. "You did! Tell me, did he snog you?"

"You have no class," I snapped grumpily. "I just helped him with his dissertation because I borrowed Remus' paper and he said I had to."

"Two things," Sirius said, sitting down and letting everything spill out of his grip and onto the table in an unorganized mess. "One, I didn't ask about dessert, I asked if you helped him with his essay. And Two, you didn't answer my question about snogging either. I feel compelled to point out that you're not acting very Lily-like."

"Yes I am!" I protested, yanking a beaker away from him.

"Er, hello? Passing notes in class and not answering my questions? And using excessive force to cut up a Teryrat Pustule? You should be careful—"

"You should be careful, Black," I snarled.

"Oh, now you're threatening me? Wow—hey, calm down! I heard they can—explode…!"

As he said his last word, the pustule sent a large stream of purple goo straight at his face. He screamed loudly, getting the attention of everyone in class.

Sirius wiped the slime off of his face with disgust, glowering at me. "This is what happens when you don't listen to me," he groaned as his features began to redden and swell. "I feel like a Quaffle," he mumbled miserably, pressing his fingers against his cheeks. "Professor? I think I'm having an allergic reaction!"

James let out a roar of laughter as he caught sight of Sirius and Professor Slughorn sighed, bustling over to deflate his head—which could very well be used in the next Quidditch game if needed.

I stirred the cauldron gleefully, inhaling the rich scent of the potion and listening to Sirius' angry lecture with only half-a-mind.

"Lils?"

I spun around at the sound of Alice's voice and smiled. "Hi," I said shyly. "Er…what's new?"

"I actually wanted to talk to you about James," she said, fidgeting slightly as we walked into the courtyard. The blast of cool air that blew at us seemed to carry away our tenseness with it. Alice began babbling and I relaxed a bit, listening to her with gratefulness. "I mean—if you want that is. You don't have to, I'm just curious. I was going to ask you in Potions, but it looked like tomato-face was being nosy."

I let out a laugh at Alice's description of Sirius.

"Yeah, he was. And annoying, too! He kept calling me Lily pad. I think we should start calling him Quaffle-head."

Alice blinked once and then burst out into giggles at my rendition of him.

"I think that's perfect," she grinned. Alice stopped walking and set her bag on the ground, sitting on top of a stone bench. She gestured to the spot next to her and I sat down, unsure of what to tell her. Much to my relief, she seemed to understand, in the way that best friends do, that I didn't know exactly how to describe James, so she began to inform me about herself.

"After we finished dinner and I went to the common room, I was sitting on the couch—"

A loud yell sounded from across the courtyard, and I averted my attention to it; it was James and Sirius lounging on the grass. I let a small smile pull at my lips before looking back at Alice and paying close attention to 'The Frank Fiasco' as she so deemed it.

"…through my Potions' book when all of a sudden he shows up, sitting there next to me all casual like. So of course, I got startled a bit and—"

"How much is a bit, Alice?" I asked, struggling to keep the humor out of the situation. Alice wasn't known for her bravery. That's why everyone was surprised with her decision to try and become an Auror.

She plucked at her skirt nervously. "I kind of screamed and threw my book at him…and then practically the whole common room started laughing at me!"

I placed my fingers over my mouth, maintaining the serious face with difficulty. "Well…they had no right to do that."

"Thank you! I tried to tell them that but they just don't understand."

"They don't get true love, I suppose." I sighed dramatically. "I mean, throwing a book at someone? That's a tell-tale sign. Just wait until you two get marri—"

"Look who's talking!" she squealed. "I always knew it!"

"Knew what?" I asked, abandoning my solemn pretense.

"'Throwing a book at someone is a tell-tale sign of true love'" she said, in a terrible imitation of me. "I seem to remember a little someone chucking a book at a little someone else…"

I paled as we both looked over at James. "I—I didn't mean it like that; obviously—er…It's the Alice way of showing love. Not the—Not the Lily way."

She gave me a pitiful smile and continued on with her story; much to my relief. "Anyway, he sorta smiled at me all sweet like, and then he handed the book back and said, 'You knocked some sense into me!'"

"You're ghastly at impressions," I snorted.

She waved off my poke cheerily and continued on with her story. "So I said, 'What kind of sense?' And then he just asked me out, plain as day, just like that!"

I smiled and risked a glance at James. "That's great, Alice!" I exclaimed happily.

Quaffle-head thrust his shoulder into his friend's side and James looked up at me, catching my eye before I looked away.

Alice gave an impatient grunt and jumped up, pacing in front of me agitatedly. "Okay, what is going on between you two?" she demanded. "You can't keep your eyes off of him, and were you tutoring him last night? And does tutoring really mean snogging? I'm dying here, Lily! I don't know anything anymore!"

I sighed resignedly and motioned for her to sit down, knowing I was defeated. She sat down, looking at me intently and I breathed in a lungful of the calming air. "Yes, I did tutor him but no, I didn't snog him. That's what I was doing all afternoon. He found me in the library and Remus had told me that I had to help James instead of him this time. That's it."

"So…did you snog him when you met him in the common room?"

"How did you know I met him in the common room?" I asked uncomfortably, wishing for more gusts of wind.

She quirked an eyebrow. "Lily. Who else would it be?"

"I dunno. But, no, we didn't snog then, either. Enough about me though. Tell me, how does Frank kiss?"

Her face changed from curious to impassive in a split second. I cringed. "Sorry—you don't have to tell me—er, back to me and James then?

She shook her head furiously and I was surprised to see that her eyes had glossed over with unshed tears.

"Alice, what's happened?" I asked concernedly, holding out my arms for a hug. She accepted and exhaled shakily.

"It's…I've just…I've done something terrible Lily."

I bit my cheek, bracing myself for her confession. "What?" I whispered.

"Last night…when you saw me, I wasn't snogging Frank." I didn't speak. "I was snogging Sirius."

I closed my eyes. "Alice…"

"I know!" she said loudly, slapping a hand to her forehead. "And I feel awful about it. It's just…on the night you and James talked, Sirius and I got to talking and somehow we started snogging and it was so great, Lily. It was everything that I had been missing from fifth year."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked, my eyes wide.

She shrugged miserably. "I thought you wouldn't approve. And every night after that we'd meet in the common room or sometimes he'd take me down to a secret passage. And then last night, I told him that I had a boyfriend and somehow we still ended up…I don't even know what happened. I absolutely regret it though. I wish I could go back in time and tell him we couldn't see each other anymore and then just walk away. It was his eyes…his eyes they just got me, and I couldn't…"

I chewed on my lip as she huffed in exasperation and angrily wiped a stray tear from her cheek. She was already beating herself up about it enough; I didn't need to express my disapproval. Instead I smiled and said, "Alice, it was a moment of weakness. It would've happened to anyone."

"Not to you," she pouted.

"No," I agreed. "But…but if James had been the one looking at me with his eyes, then I would've been helpless, just like you."

Her wet eyes enlarged a thousand fold and her lips started mouthing words silently. Eventually she swallowed them all and murmured, "He is looking at you."

I twitched and forced myself to keep my eyes on Alice. "Oh…well…that…I think Sirius knows you're dating Frank."

"Lily, that was a pathetic attempt at a subject change…but I am curious. How?"

"He read the note over my shoulder," I told her. Something clicked in my mind. "And that's probably why he seemed so surprised it was Longbottom! You didn't tell him a name, did you?"

She shook her head. "No. But he would've found out anyways…so back to you. If you weren't snogging James last night, what were you doing? Don't tell me…you and Remus?"

I choked on my own laughter as I let it loose. "No," I said, still giggling loudly. "Er…me and James actually—"

"What?" she asked, almost falling off the bench. "What did you two do? What?"

"He took me flying on his broom."

"You snuck out of the castle that late? Wow, you must really like him….Ooh, so that's why you were tired…how romantic was that? I bet that was just the coolest thing—"

"Lily! Alice!" A shrill voice interrupted Alice's go on.

We looked up to see Marlene running toward us excitedly, her long blonde hair trailing behind her.

"Ugh, I despise her," I moaned.

"Why?" Alice asked, mildly astonished. "She's so nice!"

Marlene reached us and began talking a mile a minute. "I've been looking all over for you two! I had to tell someone and you guys are the perfect people…okay…don't laugh at me…but, Sirius Black just picked up my books for me!" She squealed the last part loud enough so that a few crows milling about squawked and took flight.

"Marlene?" Alice asked in a sickly-sweet voice that wasn't hers.

"What?" she replied, her eyes positively shining. "I know it's not much, but he's so absolutely gorgeous it's a big turning point in my life!"

"You realize he's sitting right over there, don't you?" Alice pointed to where he and James sat, smiling broadly.

Marlene froze. "Are you joking?" she asked, a bright red color flooding her cheeks.

Alice shook her head and Marlene turned slowly, mortification darkening her pretty features.

Sirius winked at her and yelled out, "And such wonderful books they were!"

She gasped and turned to flee, Alice watching her with narrowed eyes and a scowl. "I despise her."

"Ah, I knew you'd understand my hatred for her, although you mustn't forget about Frank."

A familiar skinny boy emerged from behind a pillar and I clamped my mouth shut, resisting the urge to call out his name.

"Lily…?" Alice asked, nudging me. "You didn't answer me."

"Oh sorry," I said, tearing my eyes away from the hook-nosed boy as he stalked across the yard. "What'd you ask?"

"Nothing… You still talk to him?" Alice wondered, noticing who I was looking at.

I shook my head. "No. Not since the day at the tree."

She grimaced. "Well, that serves him right. Calling you a Mudblood...I still think that's despicable."

I nodded, watching in sadness as Severus glared at James. "Yeah, it is. He was my best friend."

"Greasy haired, snot-nosed—"

"He doesn't have greasy hair, Alice," I said, surprised in myself for defending him when he so badly hurt me last year.

"Of course he does!" she insisted, looking at him with disgust. "How else can you describe—"

"It's his natural shine," I muttered, not wishing to hear mean things said about Severus. It'd already hurt me enough through the years to see what he was becoming.

"Well…doesn't he hang out with all those soon-to-be-Deatheaters?" Alice asked, determined to find something wrong with him.

I couldn't deny this. Everyone knew it was true. I nodded and quietly said, "Yes. Yes, he does."

Alice didn't answer, and I was glad. Just because he'd ditched me for Dark Slytherins and mortally insulted me didn't mean that I had no care left for him. It should…but it didn't.

Severus had stopped in front of James and Sirius and was now waving his arms as he sneered insults at them. I sighed. They couldn't even see each other in the hallway without getting in a fight. Well…James could…I felt a warming sensation knowing that he had improved. Even now, he was watching Severus with amusement, not hatred. Then Sev had to take it to the next level and pull out his wand. I groaned as Alice gasped. With a wave, James' ears blossomed into large white Lilies. I started. If this was his way of showing me that he was thinking of me, or that he was sorry, he was failing miserably.

Severus stalked away and Sirius was standing up, shouting insults at "Snivelly" and brandishing his wand. Then James pulled him back down to the ground and gestured frantically at his ears. Sirius pointed to Severus who was now disappearing into the direction of the Forbidden Forest. It was clear they were having an argument about whether or not Sirius should go after Severus. I felt reassured in James knowing that he had outgrown hexing Severus even when provoked. Sirius was pouting but nevertheless attempting to help James. With Remus absent however, it was hopeless. The Lilies were now rapidly changing color and Alice and I began to giggle. Sirius got frustrated and sent a stinging hex to the flowers; only to catch James in the face.

Alice snorted and then abruptly stopped saying, "Er, Frank wants me…is it—"

"Go," I said, grinning at her. "I'm glad we talked." The memory of her confession clouded her face and then she pushed it away, smiling back at me.

"So am I."

She trotted away to where Frank was standing and moments later Sirius seemed to give up, striding the opposite way in the direction that Severus had gone. James slumped against the bench he was leaning on and pointed his wand at himself, only succeeding in transforming his nose into a Lily also. I smiled to myself as he yelled out in frustration and stood up to help him.

a/n: Review!