Haha!
Chaptah four is FINALLY here!

…sorry it took so long. I was wrapped up with college stuff.

I am back now (for a while, anyway)! Enjoyeth!

Disclaimer: I! Am! A superstar, with a big, big house and a big, big car! I! Am! A superstar, and I don't care who you are!

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I am so pissed.

Here I am, again, sitting in Dr. Tsunade's dog photo-infested office.

UGH.

"I can't believe this," Dr. Tsunade groaned.

"Can we just get this over with?" I snap. "I really don't want to be here."

"Then leave!"

"Oh, believe me--I wish I could. I'd much rather be--"

"Let's get this over with!"

I did a double take. "Excuse me?!"

Dr. Tsunade shoots me a look. "Please--no arguing today. The quicker this session progresses, the quicker you get out of here."

I wanted to punch her. "Fine," I retort.

"So, once again--what seems to be the problem, Sasuke?"

"I'm suicidal."

Dr. Tsunade dropped her pen. "You-You're…suicidal?"

"Ain't that what I said?"

Dr. Tsunade raises an eyebrow and starts scribbling on her pad. "What do you think is causing this problem?" She asks next.

"Um...the death of my clan, plus some added stress. And…maybe…some other things."

"Okay…you're not really giving me a definition."

"You need a definition for that?!"

"Yes," she replies.

What kind of therapist is she if she needs help with her job?

"Okay," I begin. "I was traumatized by the killing of my entire clan nine years ago. My older brother was the culprit. I can't tell whether I'm gay or straight. I think I'm in love with my best friend. I just might be crazy. I love the sight of blood. I--"

"Okay, that's enough," Dr. Tsunade interrupts. "Let me just write all this down…there." She glances back up at me. "Might I ask just who this 'best friend' is?"

"Yes."

Dr. Tsunade looks confused. "Yes what?"

"You asked me if you could ask who my best friend is. I said yes."

She looks as if she's ready to knock the intelligence out of me. "So…who is your best friend?"

I scoff. "That's not exactly on a need-to-know basis, now is it, doc?"

"But you said--"

"That you could ask me," I inform. "But I never said that I would tell you."

"You like annoying me, don't you?"

"To put it simply…yes."

"Why?" She cocks an eyebrow.

I mimic her actions. "Because I don't like you."

I watch for her reaction. Her top lip curls into a malicious sneer.

"Is that so?"

"Yeah. That's how it is."

She stands and walks over to me. She leans over until her lips are right next to my ear and asks, "Wanna know something?"

"What?" I ask, trying not to shudder from her touch.

"I don't like you either."

I am speechless. This can't be true! How can she not like me?

All women love me!

"And can I tell you something else?"

I don't answer, but she obviously takes this as a "yes".

"I've been recording this entire session."

It takes me a minute to process this information. "What?!"

She nods, an accomplished smile on her face. "And I'm going to tell your father."

Tell Kakashi?! NO!

I leave the therapist's with two dark clouds hanging over my head.

On the way home, Naruto is blabbering about his 'duties as Naruto! The Blonde Boy Wonder!' and his success in accompanying me on my 'perilous journey to the therapist's.'

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I know it was short…but it was successful.

Chapter Five will be posted soon!