[The episode starts with Lincoln and Sam playing video games in the living room.]
Lincoln: Yeah, I'm gonna get to the finish line first!
Sam: Not if my gum grenade has anything to say about it!
[Suddenly, the doorbell rings. Lori rushes down to answer it.]
Lori: Bobby Boo-Boo Bear! [amorously pulls him in]
Bobby: Hey, babe. Ready for an epic date? [shows her tickets]
Lori: [gasps dreamily and grabs the tickets; unimpressed] A-Truck-alypse Now... this does not sound like a romantic comedy.
Bobby: Even better. An arena show where mutant trucks crush each other!
Lori: Yeah... I'm literally not going to that. Why don't you take [looks around] Mmm... [spots two suitable candidates] Lincoln and Sam?
Sam: [while playing] We would love to, but we're in the middle of something important at the moment here.
Bobby: It's a monster truck show.
[Lincoln turns off the game.]
Lincoln & Sam: Now you're talking!
[Cut to later that night, when the three come home after a great time at the truck show.]
Lincoln, Bobby, & Sam: WHOOOO!!!
Lincoln: That was an awesome celebration of senseless destruction!
Sam: I know! They were all like- [imitates the sound of two monster trucks; and claps his hands together to simulate the collision between the two; imitates an explosion]
Bobby: Right? Bro handshake!
[The three of them continuously fist-bump and high-five each other.]
Lori: I knew you guys would hit it off.
[The boys are still doing their handshake.]
Lincoln: How do we end this?
Bobby: I have no idea.
Sam: I know!
[The three head-butt each other to end the handshake.]
Lincoln: [dazed] I think there may be a better way to end it.
[Cut to the next day at the beach, Lori and Bobby are sitting on a blanket under an umbrella.]
Lori: [holding a bottle of sunscreen] Boo-Boo Bear, would you get my back, please?
Bobby: I can't right now, babe. Lincoln and Sam just got here.
[Lincoln & Sam at the top of the hill on their bike.]
Lincoln & Sam: HEY, BOBBY!
Lori: What?
Bobby: Yeah. We had so much fun yesterday that I invited them to hang with us.
[Lincoln & Sam shred down the hill and stop in the sand, burying Lori in a pile of sand.]
Bobby: WOOOOOOO!!!
[They do their handshake, head-butt at the end included.]
Bobby: Sup, bros?
Lincoln: Hey, bro.
Bobby: Last one in the water is a loser!
[They rush off to go into the water while Lori looks befuddled under the sand. Later that night, at Jean Juan's French Mex Buffet, Lori and Bobby are on a date there, but Lincoln & Sam show up.]
Lincoln: Hey, guys! Sorry we're late. [sits with them along with Sam]
Lori: Lincoln? Sam?
Bobby: No worries, bros. We wouldn't start without ya two. [does his handshake with Lincoln & Sam with Lori looking disappointed; speaking in a thick Hispanic accent while holding a baguette] I challenge the two of you to a free-for-all, Monsieurs!
Lincoln: [grabs a churro] Oh, it is on, Señor Roberto!
[Sam grabs a taquito and joins the two in the food fight as the crumbs fall onto Lori's head.]
[Cut to later, when Lori's taking a shower. Pan over to Lori's phone charging. There are several texts from Bobby asking if she wants to hang out at the arcade with Lincoln & Sam. Since he doesn't know Lori's occupied at the time, he figures she doesn't want to go with the three.]
[Cut to later, when Lori gets out of the shower and covers her body in a towel. She decides to check her phone to see if any new messages were left. After she's done reading the messages, she calls Bobby.]
Lori: [to Bobby over the phone] You stay right where you are. I'm coming over. [hangs up; screams in frustration and tosses her phone] It was bad enough when they treated me like a third wheel, but now they're hanging out without me? I don't think so! [marches out of the room and out the front door; comes back inside] And I almost went out in public in just a towel.
[Cut to Lincoln, Bobby, & Sam playing at Gus' Games and Grub until a clothed Lori intrudes.]
Lori: Bobby, this has got to-
Bobby: Hey, babe! Look! I won you these! [gives her a bouquet of roses] Thanks for being so cool about me hanging with Lincoln. You know, all my life, I've always wished I had a brother, and now I feel like I've got some in Lincoln & Sam. It's like they complete me. Sorry, what were you gonna say?
Lori: Uh...nothing. I mean, go finish your game, Boo-Boo Bear.
Bobby: Thanks, babe. We're still on for the county fair tomorrow, right?
Lori: You bet. We're totes riding the Tunnel of Love together.
Bobby: Sweet! The Bro-dacious Trio-
Sam: Ah! Bro-dacious Tri-bro.
Bobby: -Bro-dacious Tri-bro will meet you there at 5:00.
[Lori suddenly grimaces and has had enough.]
[Cut to the living room, where Lori is talking about her problem to Lucy and Leni.]
Lori: What do I do? I'm sick of Lincoln & Sam crashing our dates, but it makes Bobby so happy. He says they're like the brothers he never had.
Leni: I know! Why don't you hang out with Bobby's little sister, Ronnie Anne? She could be like the sister you never had.
[Lori and Lucy just awkwardly stare at Leni for that statement.]
Lori: That's not gonna solve my problem at all! Besides, I already have 9 of them, including you two.
Lucy: You know, this happens in my book. Griselda thinks she's losing Edwin, so she makes him jealous and he totally comes crawling back. Well, flying, actually.
Lori: Perfect! But how do I make Bobby jealous?
[The doorbell rings, Lucy answers it, and sees it's Clyde.]
Clyde: Hi, Lucy. Is Lincoln and/or Sam around?
Lori: Clyde! Am I glad to see you.
[Clyde gets a nosebleed and faints.]
[Lucy smiles at Clyde's reaction to Lori's presence. Clyde comes to and sees Lori.]
Lori: Clyde, how would you like-
[Clyde nosebleeds and faints again. When Clyde comes to, this time he sees Lucy.]
Lucy: "Clyde. I come with a message from... [Lori signals her sister not to use her name] ...the sister who cannot be named. Said sister would like you to join her at the county fair tomorrow.
Clyde: I would love to.
Lori: [hugs him] YAY!
[Clyde gets another nosebleed.]
Lucy: How are you going to make Bobby jealous with someone who's lifeless and covered in blood? Oh, wait. That's exactly what Griselda did. [Cut to the county fair, where Lori's dragging an unconscious Clyde to a public bench and gives him his glasses now painted to look like his eyes to make it look like he's awake. Lincoln, Bobby, and Sam enter the scene.]
Bobby: Hey! It's my fair maiden! [laughs] Get it? Ready to have fun?
Lori: Totes. But, I thought a Bro-tet would be better than a Tri-bro. So, I invited someone else to join us: Clyde.
Bobby: That's cool. I love the Clydesdale. Hey, Let's grab us all some doughnuts.
Sam: Great. Doughnuts for bros. Bro-nuts, if you prefer.
[The tri-bro do their handshake.]
Lincoln: Bro train to the bro-nuts!
[The tri-bro start imitating the sound of a train engine as they shuffle over to the donut stand.]
Lori: Yeah. [laughs nervously] You go do that.
[Clyde slants even further, and his face lands in Lori's lap.]
Lori: Are you literally going to be like this the entire time? [props Clyde back up]
[Cut to later, when the tri-bro return with the bro-nuts.]
Bobby: [to Lori] Check it. we got chocolate for you, powdered for Lincoln, [to Lincoln] matches the hair, bro, [back to Lori] twisted for Sam, and sprinkles for the Clydesdale. Here you go, dude. [offers the sprinkled one to Clyde]
Lori: [shoves it in Clyde's mouth only for it to fall out] He'll eat it later.
Lincoln: Come on, bros, let's hit the Whirly Gig.
[The tri-bro initiate bro train mode again, towards the Whirly Gig.]
Bobby: [to Lori] Babe, you coming with?
Lori: Totes. Clyde and I will be right behind you. [grabs him, struggles to carry him, and falls over] You know what? We'll meet you there.
[Cut to the Whirly Gig ride.]
Bobby: This is gonna be awesome! I tipped the guy to make it go faster so we get super dizzy.
[Cut to Lori and Clyde getting on.]
Lori: [feigning] Oh, what's that, Clyde? You want me to ride to make you dizzy? [laughs] I do that to you? [laughs more] Oh, you're so sweet, Clyde.
[Cut back to the tri-bro.]
Lincoln: Hey, Bobby, check it out. [takes out three corn dogs] Someone left some perfectly good corn dogs in here.
Bobby: Sweet!
[Lincoln and Bobby eat their corn dogs.]
Sam: [takes a corn dog; to the viewers] Oh, what the heck. [eats his corn dog]
[Suddenly, the ride starts. Lincoln, Bobby, and Sam are having a blast while Lori is getting smacked about by Clyde's flailing unconscious body. Cut to the ball toss game, where Lori knocks over a pyramid of milk bottles.]
Carny: A winner!
Lori: Yes! [receives a giant teddy bear]
Bobby: Heya, babe!
Lori: [feigning romance] Oh, Clyde, thanks for winning this for me. You have such a good arm. Do you work out?
[Bobby stares at them with a suspicious look.]
Sam: Hey, Bobs! Look! Tic Tac Toe! Tic Tac Bro, if you'd like.
[Lincoln & Sam throw balls at the panels and each get three X's in a diagonal row.]
Carny: Some winners! [gives the two remote controlled airplanes]
Lincoln: [offering his to Bobby] For you.
Bobby: Whoa! I've always wanted a remote controlled airplane! [tries it out and accidentally hits Lori with it]
Lori: GYAH!!! [falls over]
Bobby: Come on, bros!
[Lori gets back up.]
Lincoln: Later, sis! [goes off with Bobby]
[Lori is about to pick up Clyde, but only to get hit with Sam's airplane. She accidentally tosses Clyde at the strength tester, where someone hammers the lever and launches Clyde up to the bell right on his head, not even fazing him.]
Sam: [in reaction] Ooh! Sorry 'bout that.
[Lori glares at him.]
Sam: To both of you, I mean.
Carny: A winner! [gives Lori a stuffed orca as well as Clyde]
[Cut to later, when Lori walks over to Flip's cotton candy cart and puts Clyde on it.]
Lori: One cotton candy, please.
[While she gets out her change, Clyde falls into the machine and Flip runs away. Lori gets him out and now his hair is covered in cotton candy. She eats it.]
Bobby: [upset] Hey, babe. You never eat cotton candy off my head.
[Lincoln and Sam enter the scene.]
Sam: Here, Bobs. Got us some snow cones. Or should I say, bro cones.
Bobby: [cheered up] Sweet! Let's see who can get a brain freeze first.
[They eat their snow cones and get brain freezes at the same time and cheer.]
Bobby: YEAH!
Lincoln: WHOO!
Sam: [groans in pain]
[They run off and Clyde's cotton candy hair falls on Lori's.]
Lori: [disgusted] Eww! [washes Clyde off with a water pistol from the balloon popping game; sees the boys doing her handshake; runs into the photo booth with Clyde] Oh, Clyde. [laughs] Here, snuggle in closer. [comes out] Oh, hi, guys.
Bobby: Umm...
Lincoln and Sam: [whistle offcreen, getting Bobby's attention. Pan over to them with their heads in a head hole mural.]
Lincoln: Bobby, check it out! Cowboys on dinosaurs! Wanna take some bro-tos?
Bobby: Good call, my man!
[Lori becomes more irked at this. The photo booth's photos have developed and it shows that her photo op did not go well. As she literally drags on, she notices that her best chance is to use the Tunnel of Love and gets in with Clyde.]
Lori: Hey, guys.
Bobby: [upset] Babe, the Tunnel of Love is our ride.
Lori: I know, but you were off with the other members of your tri-bro, so...
Lincoln: [showing Bobby another ride] Bobby, look at that ride! The Toilet Bowl! Or as I like to call it, the Toilet Bro-wl!
Bobby: No way! Let's go get flushed, bros!
[The three high-five, and head off to the Toilet Bowl.]
Lori: Bobby! Wait!
Ride Operator: Join hands, you lovebirds. [starts the ride as Lori groans] What an adorable couple.
Lori: Oh, shut it. [Cut to the inside of the tunnel.]
Lori: [sighs] This stinks. This was supposed to be a romantic date with Bobby, and now look where I am. [to the unconscious McBride boy] No offense, Clyde. It's just...I should be on this ride with my boyfriend. But maybe I don't even have a boyfriend anymore. Bobby doesn't seem to care about being with me at all.
[As she laments, Clyde falls out of the boat.]
Lori: Clyde? [looks back and sees him fall into the river.] CLYDE!
[The ride stops and the fair staff gets him out.]
Maintenance Man: Got him! We have five for five this week!
[Lincoln, Bobby, and Sam have just got flushed out of the Toilet Bowl.]
Lincoln, Bobby, and Sam: TOILET BROWL!!! [do their handshake]
Lincoln: That was awesome! You guys up for number two?
Sam: I'm down!
Bobby: You read my mind, bro! Be right back. [heads off to the bathroom]
Lincoln: [to Bobby] The ride, I meant, though.
[As the two wait for their bro, they hear Lori crying.]
Ride Operator: Miss, your boyfriend's okay. He's in the medical tent drying off.
Lori: [bawling] He's not my boyfriend...I literally don't think I have a boyfriend anymore! [continues sobbing]
[Lincoln & Sam go over to her.]
Sam: [to Lori] What's the matter?
[Lori slowly stops crying and faces the two with livid expressions.]
Lori: [enraged; growls] YOU TWO!!!
Sam: [nervously] Yeah... On second thought, we'll come back later. [attempts to flee from Lori's wrath, along with Lincoln]
[However, Lori grabs the both of them by their shirt collars.]
Lori: [to Lincoln & Sam] Think you can take my boyfriend away from me and get away with it?!
Sam: [struggles] What are you talking about?
Lori: You've been keeping Bobby distracted from me the entire day.
[Lincoln & Sam look at each other and laugh hysterically.]
Lori: [extremely livid] YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY TO COME BETWEEN ME AND MY BOO-BOO BEAR?!
Sam: [calms down; stops laughing; to Lori] No, it's just that... You got this all wrong.
Lincoln: [to Lori] We were just having some bro time.
Sam: You know, being Turbo Bros. Or Tur-bros, if you prefer.
Lincoln: [to Lori] We never actually meant to come between you and Bobby.
Bobby: Yeah, I was just spending some time with my bros here. But, I'll always have time for you, babe.
Lori: [in realization] Oh... [laughs nervously] I had this whole plan to make you jealous by bringing Clyde, and... [sighs] Well, I feel like a fool now.
Sam: [to Lori] And I would really appreciate it if you could let go of us now.
[Lori lets go of the two's shirts and feels even more remorseful than before.]
Bobby: [consoling her] It's OK, babe. Listen. Why don't we go on the Tunnel of Love together? Just you... and me.
Lori: I would love to, Boo-Boo Bear.
[The two hold hands as they go over to the Tunnel of Love.]
Lincoln: Another happy ending.
Sam: At least we'll still have a bro-dacious tri-bro with or without Bobs. We have Clyde for that.
Lincoln: Speaking of which, where is he?
[The intercom comes on with an important announcement.]
Announcer: Would the parents of a soggy boy with cotton candy in his nose please come to the medical tent!
Sam: Well, there's our answer.
[Later that night, back home, Lincoln, Clyde, and Sam are hanging out again.]
Lincoln: Clyde, I hope you didn't feel left out when we were hanging with Bobby.
Clyde: Are you kidding? I got to have a date with Lori! I just wish I could remember it.
[There's a knock at the door. Sam answers it and it's revealed to be Bobby.]
Bobby: Hey, is Lori here?
Lincoln: Yeah. Come on in. So, are we cool?
Bobby: Totally, dudes.
[The three do their bro handshake.]
Clyde: I appreciate you being so mature, especially after the very romantic date I'm told I just had with your lady.
Boys: BROSHAKE!!!
[They perform it altogether and Lucy appears out of nowhere.]
Lucy: Clyde.
[The boys yelp at her sudden appearance.]
Sam: [to Lucy; surprised] Dah! You really need to stop doing that!
Lucy: [to Clyde] The sister who cannot be named would like to thank you for hanging out with her at the fair. Further, she would like you to have this gift as a remembrance of your time together.
Clyde: For me? [opens it up and finds it's the photos from the photo booth along with a thank you note; stuttering; gets another nosebleed and faints]
Lincoln: That's my bro.
[Lincoln, Bobby, and Lucy all laugh.]
Sam: [exasperated] I don't get it. How's Clyde's obsession with Lori supposed to be at all funny?
THE END