Chapter 4 - Severus

Severus is so grief-stricken after the incident by the lake that for the first time in years he finds himself crying. Soundless, silent tears, slipping over his cheeks as he sits on the banister of the astronomy tower, looking at the night sky. He curses each one of them but is powerless to hold them back as he was unable to stop himself from calling Lily a Mudblood.

She called him Snivellus and joined Potter and his gang.

Severus begged for her forgiveness but she doesn't want to know him anymore. He thought that their friendship was stronger than that, but it seems that it weakened some time ago. The M word just quickened the inevitable.

It's what his logic tells him but in his heart he still believes that there is hope for him.

He thinks of many things he can do right now, jumping from the very banister he sits on included, but nothing which will give him Lily back.

Two hours later he paces nearby a tapestry with Barnabas the Barmy on it. It's insane to think that the Room of Requirement could give him Lily. Even if it did, she may not want to listen to him as she did not so long ago.

But he has to try. He doesn't refer to her as Lily, feeling ashamed of his stupid idea. He chooses fond words describing her instead; a fierce tempered little redhead.

When the door appears right in front of him he's afraid to go inside. What's there awaiting for him?

Real Lily?

Her magical equivalent?

Taking a deep breath, Severus enters the room.

The sight makes him feel disappointed and angry. There is a red headed girl, but even as she's standing far away from him, he cal tell that she's not Lily. She doesn't even act like Lily as she's staring at him with her mouth agape.

Severus knows that it's some creation of this room. He can barely control himself, wanting to throttle her for being such a miserable duffer of Lily. It seems that everything is against him. Even the stupid Room of Requirement is mocking him.

He takes all his anger out on her, feeling it rise as she's babbling about knowing him from books. He feels an odd satisfaction seeing that this slip of a girl is frightened by him. She takes steps back, but to his disappointment she fights against her obvious fear.

There is no sense of self-preservation in her, so she's not a Slytherin for sure. Probably next bloody Gryffindor. Yes, he can admit that she's real now. Something tells him that she is, a sixth sense or whatever it is.

She's convinced that he's some bloody celebrity, but he knows that this title is shared between Potter and Black. She claims to be from future and suddenly Severus curses himself for being so hostile towards her.

He feels a plan formulating in his head. She knows about Lily, so surely she knows what to do with the situation he found himself in. Maybe there is hope for him yet?

The bloody creature wants to leave the room, and he's not going to show how much he cares about knowing anything about his future. It's she who is the weak one as she's babbling about seeing him again.

Rose Weasley.

There are no Weasleys in Hogwarts with him, he never heard the surname, so she's probably some Mu-

No! He'll never call anyone like that. There will be no accidents like that one by the lake. She's some stupid twit who knows nothing about Wizarding world.

He told himself, he promised himself to never call anyone that. And Severus is a man of his word, regardless of his young age.

He knows he needs this stupid Weasley, because she can solve his problems with Lily. He hopes that she will, providing him answers for his questions. If she's real and telling the truth about future. But she knew about him wanting Lily again, so he will give it a go and try to be polite.

If she's from the future, then it is no matter for him how much time passes on her side, right? He decides, that tomorrow he'll go to the room and if she ever wanted to see him again, she will be there regardless how long she gathered her courage to face him again.

He has problems with sleeping. He always had. It increases when he thinks of something. Now he's troubled, angry, sad and curious. He tosses in his bed until the early morning hours.

Decent sleep is not his only problem. His stomach rebels against food while he's in a state like this and that is the reason why he's still scrawny despite the fact that Hogwarts provides three decent meals at day. He looks at his plate, not wanting to look at her.

Angrily he pushes the plate away and decides to skip History of Magic. The subject is boring and Binns has absolutely no power over students so they can torment him as they please. Lily would no longer be sitting with him, and there would be nothing standing between him and the four prats.

Who happen to sit behind him.

Bloody excellent.

'I want to see Rose Weasley,' he thinks for the third time and the door appears out of thin air.

He snorts at the sight of her.

In stead of a mildly freckled, brown eyed redhead he sees…well it's her for sure, but Salazar the great!

Her face is so pale that she looks almost translucent. She used something to cover every freckle, her eyes are dramatically dark and her lips are bloody red, giving her a resemblance of something between a vampire and a well preserved corpse.

She's chosen black clothes which cover all except her hands and face and the whole effect is ridiculous and rather repulsive. Her lips are set into a thin line and she's shaking as he approaches her with almost predatory grace.

Many thanks to manicrose who corrected the chapter and to my reviewers! I love to know what you think.

I struggled with the first paragraph. I wasn't sure if Severus would let himself cry. I got back to the books and re-read an interview with J.K.R. and yes- I believe that he love for Lily, stubborness to learn Dark Arts and young age could make him cry from helplessness of the situation.