Not long after the call from the apparently notorious and ever-destructive Zim, Purple and Red took Red to what appeared to be a rather large conference room where at least thirty other Irkens sat at the long sleek table placed at the center of the room. She followed the two to the head of the table and stood between them.
Red slammed his fists down on the large table. "Alright, everyone! We're here to discuss the best method of introducing Kat to the general public of the Irken Empire. Any questions?"
One Irken raised his gloved hand. Red pressed a button on the table in front of him that, Kat noticed, had not been there ten seconds ago. The nameless Irken who'd raised his hand was at once obliterated by lasers, the only thing left being his PAK and a small pile of smoking ashes. Kat was visibly alarmed at the blatant disregard for life, but nothing was said regarding her obvious discomfort.
"Anymore questions?" Purple asked humorously. All others shook their heads. "Good! NOW LET'S HEAR SOME SUGGESTIONS!"
A minute or two passed until one of the clearly bolder Irkens raised their hand. "Yes, Event Planner Yix?" Red inquired.
"We could use the Stadium Planet and she could give a speech?" The young event planner clearly wasn't sure of his suggestion, and Kat sort of pitied him.
"That's a terrible idea!" shouted Purple, who then pressed the very same button Red had earlier to incinerate the poor innocent.
"Actually, that's not a bad idea," said Red.
"Yeah," Purple said, "I just didn't like the guy."
Kat was frozen in disbelief. None of the others in the meeting hall had even blinked when one of their fellow workers was incinerated! She mentally shook herself out of it when the Tallest turned to address her.
No reason to appear nervous on your first day, she thought to herself, They only incinerated two innocent…people?
"What do you think, Kat?" Purple asked.
"You up for giving a speech?" Red asked right after.
Kat nodded and gave a nervous smile.
Don't give them a reason to incinerate you. DON'T GIVE THEM A REASON TO INCINERATE YOU.
"Yeah, I think I can manage," were the words she managed to get out.
"Excellent! Meeting adjourned!" declared Red. As soon as that was said, multiple robotic arms rose up from the table and punched each of the event planners in the face. "It's tradition to punch each event planner in the face after an event has been planned," explained Purple.
Kat stood there in disbelief. Her new home was weird.
Later:
Kat, Purple, and Red were sitting in the main control room of the Massive. Kat was trying to write her speech. Red came up and looked over her shoulder, "How much have you got so far?" "Well, right now, all I have is 'Citizens of the Great Irken Empire! I cannot tell you how proud I am proud to be your new Second-in-Command! I look forward to serving the mightiest empire in existence!'." she sighed. Purple leaned over her should as well, "Seems kind of long," he stated. Kat looked at him incredulously, "Long?" Red nodded in agreement with his fellow Tallest, "Yeah, but it shouldn't be a problem. Think you can get it memorized by tomorrow?" Kat rubbed her eyes with her left hand. She was tired and her new home confused her to no end. "Y-yeah, no problem," she muttered.
The Next Day:
"Citizens of the Great Irken Empire! Please welcome your all-powerful rulers—The Almighty Tallest!" A booming voice echoed from the gargantuan speakers built into the foundations of the Stadium planet.
Thousands upon thousands of Irkens erupted with applause and shouts of praise. Red and Purple walked out onto the large circular platform located at the center of the stadium. The two waved at the mindless, brain-washed civilians until their arms grew tired.
"SHUT UP ALREADY!" Purple yelled at the crowd.
Red gave Purple a 'look', "Thank you, Purple".
Purple ignored the look Red shot him and shouted to the crowd, "Citizens of Irk!"
Red continued, "We, the brilliant, good-looking, and all-powerful Tallest have an important announcement!"
"Meet your new Second-in-Command of the Mighty Irken Empire!"
"Tall Kat!" The two finished in unison.
On cue, Kat's figure slowly rose from the stage, accompanied by plenty of smoke machines and lasers. Once the platform reached the top of the stage, she stepped forward. The crowd went wild. She waited a minute before raising her arms, signaling the crowd to silence themselves. As the crowd settled, she began to speak "Citizens of the Great Irken Empire!" she started (man were they using that phrase a lot today), "I cannot tell you how proud I am to be your new Second-in-Command!" Once again the crowd broke out in applause, soon subsiding so that Kat could finish. "I look forward to serving the mightiest empire in existence!" She then joined Red and purple on the platform she had arrived on. The three were then lowered underneath the stage to make their way back to the Massive.
Even as they flew away, the screams and cheers of the mindless civilians could be heard coming from the stadium. Kat couldn't believe how easily the Irkens blindly followed their…. "government". Given, the people of Earth certainly weren't independently minded, but this was on a completely different level.
"Well that's that, then. You've been officially introduced to the empire as its new Second-in-Command," Red proclaimed as she followed him and Purple into the Master Control room. "So…..What now?" she asked. Red and Purple glanced at each other, then back at Kat. "Hey you! Yeah you!" Red yelled at a nearby worker, "We got any empire stuff to do?" The Irken was visibly startled, but scrambled off dutifully to check on any and all empire affairs in need of attendance by the Tallest. "And bring me some nachos!" Purple called after him. He turned to Kat, "I hope they have jalapeños." Unsure how to respond, Kat merely smiled. Red rolled his eyes.
Several Hours Later:
As it turned out, there actually wasn't any 'empire stuff' that needed doing. As such, the three most powerful individuals of the most powerful empire in the universe were lounging around on the couch until they reached wherever the hell they were going. Purple had been brought his nachos about an hour ago and was still stewing over the fact that they had not in fact come with jalapeños on them; and would not hesitate to remind everyone in the room of this every several minutes. Red was not pleases about the lack of jalapeños either, but still managed to eat them anyway.
"Aw, man. I have to go to the bathroom," groaned Kat. "HEY, SCOTT!" yelled Red, "SHOW KAT WHERE THE BATHROOM IS!" Kat winced and covered her ears, but followed the loyal servant when he arrived.
Not long after Kat had left, Zim's face appeared on the giant screen. "Why do these nachos have no jalapeños?" Purple yelled. Red looked up and noticed Zim. He nudged Purple, whose attention then shifted to the Massive's giant monitor as well. Both groaned. "What do you want now Zim?" Red asked. Zim saluted the two before posing his request "I wish to speak with Tall Kat. I have important information regarding her home planet."
Yes! Finally, what most of you have been waiting for! Of course, keep in mind that this chapter is currently unedited. I have a beta pending, and I wanted to let you guys read this as soon as possible since you've been waiting patiently for so long. If all goes well, a better, edited version should be up sometime in the future! Thanks for waiting! You guys are awesome! 3