A/N: ...Just fiddling around with this while I work on other stories... As always, kid #4 is out of step...
Disclaimer: I own no one you recognize, but everyone you don't... Unless you actually like my OCs and you know them, then I do own them.
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I love my daddy. Even ten years after we were separated, I still love him.
People like to laugh whenever I call my daddy 'Daddy.' They say that a young woman my age shouldn't be using such childish terms. I simply tell them to shut up with a swift raise of a finger.
My voice is still gone, but it comes back every now and then. Cousin Sig said that's because the clot-thing is starting to loosen, and once it finally comes off and up, my voice will come back.
But what if it goes down instead of up?
What if no one's around when it happens and I die?
What if something happened and I'm left mute forever?!
What if instead of becoming free after a few coughs, I begin to choke?
Sig tells me to not panic, to stay calm, but I can't help it. I have anginophobia- The fear of choking. It developed a few years ago.
I don't like talking about why I developed it.
King Damas arrived a few years ago. Apparently a few of his 'close' advisors staged a coup and over-threw him. He showed up infront of our gates with a small child. When I asked why, and Sig translated, Damas sighed.
The little boy is Mar, the newest member of his clan. He's really sweet, and he's very talkative. He reminds me a lot of my brother...
I also asked where his older son was.
I wish I hadn't asked...
He's gone. Lost, just like my daddy.
I'm sure they're both alive, but people constantly doubt me.
I know they're alive- They're just not here!
But, that little doubting voice in my head has gotten stronger, and now I question myself a lot...
What if they really aren't alive?
What if they're lost forever?
Why did I ever think they were still alive..?
Sig, a few Wastelanders and I are venturing to Haven to try and find any information that could lead to Mar's brother's location. I'm kinda excited to see Haven again.
It's been a few years...
I wonder if we'll find my daddy there too...
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I love my papa, but only because he is my papa. If he were anyone else, I wouldn't hesitate to rip out his throat.
My papa used to be able to do no wrong, but now that I am older, I realize that he's nothing but a liar.
Several more raids have occured since that one fateful day, and each time papa weaves more lies to try and hide who he really is, and in turn hiding who my sister and I really are.
I found out why the guards hate us. In history, we were learning about the great Mar and his battle against the Acherons and how the Acherons drew their own demise by researching Dark eco.
The teacher went on to describe how they had cursed their young and further generations by channeling the 'cursed' substance, and how everyone bearing their name were nothing but mindless monsters, slaves and weapons.
Something inside me snapped that day. I felt, angry, enraged, furious that two people and entire generations were being reduced to stereotypes and generalizations. I voiced my thoughts, my feelings, and received shrieks and panic in return.
I asked a friend why panic had ensued, and he gave me a shocking answer.
Apparently, my eyes had turned solid violet, and my skin began to turn a gray-blue hue.
I confronted papa that night.
Who are you really?
What are you hiding?
Why are you lying?
He dodged every question I asked, answering solely with one phrase-
I don't know what you're talking about...
I felt anger boil up inside.
I felt like I was about to snap.
I was going to, honestly, but then a small voice squeaked behind me.
If you won't tell us that, then tell us what's wrong with us, papa...
My sister, gods rest her soul, pulled off her sweater, revealing arms turning a dark purple-blue. Her nails were claw-like, and for once in my life, I noticed how scared she was.
Papa turned and walked away.
I'll tell you when you're older...
Erin began to cry, and I held her.
We ran away a week later, and I noticed a young girl walking around that looks a lot like my cousin.
I haven't seen her in ages...
...Just like my papa.
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...I don't know who to love anymore...
My father and mother have both been proclaimed dead, along with my younger brother. My aunt is extremely nervous all the time, and my uncle's a worthless drunk. My cousin's are whores and druggies, and the only person I feel I can trust anymore is myself.
My weird visions have become a part of my life since they started ten years ago. They all predict some part of the future, and they allow unwanted insight to an individual's life upon eye-contact. When I sleep, I see my own life and all the possible ends to it.
They have ruined my life forever, making me fear simple things that shouldn't be feared.
Somniophobia, Scopophobia, Sociophobia, and Agoraphobia to name a few...
I saw my uncle's life, and I pray each day that his end will arrive sooner than later.
He is a monster; beating my aunt when something happens out of anyones control, encouraging my cousins to continue their self-destructive ways, and blaming me for everything that has happened.
I ran away one night, just to escape the chaos even for a second.
Going outside, I felt what was left of my heart shatter.
Praxis has finally crafted the city in his image. People are wallowing in their own filth, beggar line the streets, children are being abducted and sold for various reasons and the only thing his guards care about is making sure no one tries to rise up against him.
The one thing I had left of my father-
The one thing that was going to be passed from him to me-
The one thing that my ancestors had worked so hard to create and breathe life into-
Dead.
Dying.
Crying.
SUFFERING...
I sighed, knowing that if I attempted to do or say anything I wouldn't get too far.
The circus happened to be in town, so I went.
It brought back memories of how my father would take me along with my friends and their father. It was a 'peasantly' thing to do, but I loved it.
I sat in the back, hiding the shadows to witness what feats had been advertised. The usual circus banter rolled through- Clowns, lions, tigers, acrobats, tightrope walkers- You name it, they had it.
The act that actually frightened me was the 'Fire Breathing' girl. Fire had been such a large Precursor to misfortune for me in the past, I found myself suffering from selective pyrophobia every day of my life.
Luckilly, the girl was good at her act and no stray flames brushed against cotton. I breathed a sigh of relief.
The citizens were happy for once, and as I left I knew that Praxis would pay the circus to never return again.
Joy was something he hated, like a small child hates their parents after being treated unfairly...
Upon returning to chaos I am reprimanded, scolded, and beaten for worrying my aunt to near death. I ignore all yells and blows, and walk on towards my broom-closet sized room.
I sigh and lay on the floor.
As deep red crests over light tan, a small smile spreads over my face...
I hope that tonight-
Through all the screams,
Through all the panic,
Through all the crying,
Through all the mayhem,
Through all the chaos-
I will finally find them again...
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I love my mom. She's been really quiet lately, but I know she's just thinking a lot. I'm not sure why mom's thinking so much, but I think she's thinking about my older brother.
Essaji and her friend have been visiting a lot lately, and I know that mom and Kaile are thinking about the same thing since they both get really quiet and stare at each other when they're not doing something.
Essaji also brings her brother, Sparky. Sparky's really funny, and he's really fun to play with. Sometimes he gets really nervous and shaky, though, and begins to mumble to himself, but he gets better after a few minutes...
They all draw and act all artsy whenever they visit. Mom laughs and calls Kaile a 'Southpaw,' which leads him to tell mom she's too into her art while he paints a line on her forehead. 'Saji and Sparky and I laugh and make fun of our drawings. We even have competitions to see who can draw the worst.
Sparky always wins, and Essaji says she runs a close second.
Lately though, only Kaile comes by to visit, and he and mom talk funny while I doodle on a piece of paper.
Kaile calls mom 'Madre' a lot, and mom calls him 'Bambino' when they talk.
I wonder what they're saying?
I wonder what language they're using?
I wonder if dad would be able to understand them?
...I haven't thought about dad a lot lately.
I really miss him.
I wish he'd come find me, and take me, 'Saji, Kaile, Sparky, and mom back home where we belong.
Then, we all could live together and never have to worry about losing each other ever again...
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A/N: ...Damn, the 4th kid's section's getting harder and harder to write... I might just end his segment next chapter... Well, you know the drill, review, comment, flame, whatever...