Ohh God, right okay:) Sorry for being so, so late! and not updating enough, but im writing again, slowly but confidently:) I sort of found it hard to write the last section on this chapter, in fact it almost had me in tears:/ hope you feel the emotion aswell. Please Review, love them all:).
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited, but i couldn't stay away, i couldn't fight it, i'd hope you see my face and that you'd be remined that for me it isn't over...3
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I sit on the toilet seat, smiling to myself as I watch the pregnancy test, I had in my hand. Another baby, another little person around the house, Someone for Charlie to play with. I had to let Alice in on our little secret, since I wouldn't be able to go to the shops without everyone wanting to tag along. My thumb was covering the screen bit where the results come up, it had been fifteen minuets, the time recommended to wait. I moved my thumb, slowly, I wanted to be pregnant, but what if I wasn't? Edward would be crushed, I think he might have wanted another baby for a long time, he just didn't want to say. He didn't want to seem rude, that's all. I sigh to myself, What was I doing? I remove my thumb.
My heart just sunk to the bottom of my stomach. Not pregnant. But I was so sure. I slowly twist the door handle and let myself out of the bathroom. There on the perfectly made bed was my husband, and my baby boy. I fake a smile, but Edward saw straight through me.
"Charlie, mate, why don't you go downstairs! I think I can smell some of Grandmas amazing chocolate cookies," Edward says playfully to our son.
"Yay," Charlie shouts. He jumps of the bed and comes running too me.
"Mommy granny made cookies," He jumps up and down excitedly.
"That's great hunnie! Quick go get some before granddad eats them all," I giggle. He rushes out of our room. I listen for the little pitter patter of his feet running down the stairs, before I close our bedroom door.
"Baby what's wrong?" Edward says, coming over too me, taking me by the waist and pulling me closer too him.
I hold the test up and sigh. I saw Edward try to keep the smile he had on his face, but he wasn't fooling me.
"Baby its okay," He said to me softly, before he kissed my forehead.
"It doesn't feel okay, and it doesn't feel right," I admitted. He lead us both to the bed and sat down, I crawled into his lap.
"I was just so sure I was pregnant." I sighed. I let my weight fall into Edward! He so slowly lead us down on the bed, still holding me close.
"Well do you want another baby?" I look up at him, he just smiled down at me whilst rubbing my arm for comfort.
"Well do you?" I asked him back. I needed to be sure that he was as committed as I was. Charlie was sort of forced onto us, not that I regret that, but we had no choice but to go along with it. If we plan this baby we both have to be in it to the end, no backing out half way.
"Bella of course I do! I want another bundle of joy with the most beautiful person in my life. I want another baby for Charlie to run around with, and be able to be a big brother. Baby you know I've always wanted more than one child, I love being a father, and I know with you by my side, we'd be able to handle another little monster running around the house," He really was an inspirational person. I smile at him, and he lets out a happy chuckle.
"Of course," I sigh with happiness. Its amazing how my mood can be changed by him, he always has a hold on me.
We lay there for a bit, Just cuddled up with each other.
"Charlotte Alice Cullen," Edwards words spoke real beauty.
"Don't you think that pretty baby?"
"It has a ring too it," I smile. Charlotte Cullen. It was a pretty name.
"What if it's a boy," I say to him, snuggling into his chest a little more.
"Well we have, Charlie Masen Cullen I was sort of thinking…. Daniel Jasper Cullen,"
"Jasper would like that," I giggle a little. I pull myself up and look at Edward.
" We'll see," I smile at him, and he laughs a little. I lean down to him so that our faces were a few centimetres away from each other. His lips broke into a cocky smile as he put his hand softly around the back of my neck and slowly brought my lips down to his. His soft lips kissed mine more and more, until He end up pushing my down on the bed and was hovering over me, still kissing my lips. I snake my arms about his neck and pull him closer too me. His perfect toned body was still hovering over mine.
I let my tongue trace his bottom lip.
"Baby stop," He says, Breaking the link between our lips.
"Not now," He brings himself into a sitting position. I pull myself up too.
"I'm sorry," I sigh, I knew that me doing that with my tongue would trigger everything, that it would make him really want me, It always does.
"don't be, I was enjoying myself, you know I want you! We just can't not right now," I knew he was right.
"I know, When we get back home"
"Of course," He smiles, as he gets of the bed.
"Common," He Puts out his hand for me to take. I take his hand in mine and let him lead me down the stairs.
"Mommy" Charlie shouts as we get to the middle of the stair case.
"What is it sausage?" I say laughing as he comes running up too me, He tugs at my leg.
"We made some more cookies, me and granny, try one mommy," He jumps down the stairs one at a time, until he gets too the bottom. I follow him down leading Edward this time. Our hands still connected.
Charlie hands me a ready made chocolate chip cookie. I smile at him as I take it from his precious, little hands and take a bite of it. The soft, crunchy substance took over my mouth. At first it tasted sweet and delicious, but then the taste turned into a sickening taste that filled my mouth with nothing but bland horrible tasting gooeyness.
"ohh god," I hold my mouth as I run up the massive stair case and barely make it to the bathroom, to throw up. I sit, limp by the toilet. Just trying to catch my breath. There was a rumble of many feet come up the stairs.
"Hey, Hey, stop, she's not going to want everyone in there is she?" Alice yelled. The rumble of feet stopped, and slowly the door opened a crack. Alice stepped in, her face had an understanding look on it.
"Bella, are you….?"
"No, I'm not, the test came up negative. Alice I don't understand," I sigh in dismay. She flushed the toilet and then came and sat next to me. She sighed and put her arm around my shoulder. I leaned my head against her shoulder.
"You know those things are wrong sometimes,"
"What the tests?" I look up at her with hope.
"God yes, that's why you should try more than one, I got you three, when I went to the shop Bella," I just look at her. A smile crept across her face.
"I cant wait to be an Auntie to another little monster," She giggled. I shushed her.
"Alice keep your voice down, no one can know okay?"
"But why-"
"Shhh because I doubt I'm even two months yet," I whisper.
"Okay," She whispered back quietly.
A gush of people came into the bathroom a moment later, which admittedly made me jump out of my skin.
"Mommy," Charlie cried.
"I'm sorry my cookies made you sick mommy, I didn't mean too," He cries as he ran into my lap.
"Aww hunnie you didn't, mommy's just not feeling very well," I look up at Edward, He looked worried.
"Why don't you give daddy a cookie and make him taste it," I wink at my child and he laughs at me. Charlie hugs me tight, and I pick him up in my arms.
"Bella dear, you are okay aren't you? Just say if you're not." Esme says, in a caring tone. I just smile at her politely and nod my head.
"Right okay, everyone down stairs for breakfast," Esme says quickly Clapping her hands, she understood that I needed alone time with Edward. I put Charlie down and he runs off, following the others.
"Baby what's wrong now? I'm getting worried again," Edward says, taking me by the waist. I place my hands on his chest.
"It doesn't even matter," I smile weakly.
"Hey, in sickness and in health, remember?"
"Yeah I remember," I hug him tightly, trying to forget the subject. At the moment I didn't want to tell him I might be pregnant, I don't want to give his hopes up, for the second time.
"Do you want to stay in today? I mean mum and dad were going to take Charlie too the beach with Alice, but I'll stay home if you want me too."
"Edward I'm not stupid, I know you want too go," I smile up at him "Its fine, I'll be fine, I just need a few hours sleep. I might end up joining you-" I interrupt him before he could speak over me "-And yes I will call you if I need you, hunnie go have fun with your family."
"Bella, you're the best," He leans down too kiss me, but I move my face away.
"You don't want to do that," I giggle a little. He smiles at me and kisses my forehead.
"You sure you want me too go,"
"Hunnie don't rush," I smile, He gives me a small sigh, before he gives me a small peck on the lips.
"Well maybe rush a little," He chuckles at me before he walks out the door. Leaving me standing alone in the massive bathroom.
After brushing my teeth a few times, I head down stairs just in time to catch them going out, But some woman, someone I didn't know was holding my child's hand.
"Charlie," I ask a little chocked. He turns around. He had a massive smile on his face.
"Uhh, where's my hug?" I ask trying not to look awkward.
"But mommy you're ill," He says a little uncertain. I smile, trying not to go red. The woman turns around as well. It was that Angela woman.
"You're hug would make mummy feel better," I smile even bigger, trying not to get jealous of this woman.
"Okay mommy," He says giggling. I catch him in my arms as he runs up too me.
"You be a good boy for granny and granddad at the beach," I say to him happily as I head for the door. Everyone else followed me out, but not Edward, he hung about for this Angela person. I gave my baby boy another massive hug before setting him down on his feet. I couldn't help but feel a little replaced and pushed out.
"You alright baby," Edward says as he comes up behind me. I turn around in time to hug him tightly.
"Yeah I'm okay," I smile weakly.
"Remember, just call," He says before kissing my head.
"You have a lovely little boy," Angela says politely, With a smile on her face. I fake my own smile, I wasn't buying it.
"Yeah," I respond.
"Uhh Angela, popped by, so we decided to take her to the beach with us," Edward said a little too awkwardly, but I knew he wanted her too come.
"Ohh was I intruding on something?" No of course not…
"No, no of course not, You lot have a good time," I try too seem honest. I smile at Edward as I walk back into the house. I stood by the front door.
"Bella help yourself to anything you want. Feel better sweetheart," Esme shouts too me, just before she got into the car. I watch as they drive off.
"What too do now?" I sighed as I close the door and step back into the house. Something didn't feel right with my stomach. I hold it, thinking I was going to be sick, but then it just makes a dying whale sound, which made me realise, I was starving.
I stick my head in the fridge, but something smelled, really bad. It made me gag.
"Holy shit what is that?" I hold my nose as I stick my head back into the over sized fridge. As I move a few things around the smell become more obvious and vile. I stick my hand right too the back of the fridge and pull out a plate with a massive chunk on smelly cheese on it.
"Ohh you have got to be kidding me," I put my hand over my mouth and once I could gain the strength to not throw up, I grab the plate and chuck the cheese in the bin.
I give up on trying to feed myself and go upstairs to take a hot shower. As I step into the sweet little bathroom that was connected to mine and Edwards bedroom. I noticed the bag of pregnancy tests that Alice had gotten.
Should I? I step closer to where the bag was placed on the floor. As I pick it up I peer inside and true too her word there was two other pregnancy tests. How did I not notice these?
Instead of doing one test I did them both. I pick at my lips as I watch the test that I had set on the side of the bath.
"Common," I say impatiently. This sort of reminded me of when I first found out I was pregnant with Charlie.
Bella sat on the floor next to the toilet, a few single tears running down her cheek.
"Please, please don't be, come up negative," She cries silently to herself, trying not to wake up her newly wed husband, it had been three weeks since their honeymoon.
"Baby, why are you sat in the dark?" Edward worried voice came from the other side of the door.
"Edward its nothing," Bella tried to keep her voice steady.
"Bella unlock this door."
"Edward no, just leave me alone for a while." There was no reply. Until Edward, knocked down the door, leaving it barely on its hinges.
"Jesus Christ. What is wrong with you," Bella shouted angrily. Edward ignored her and rushed too her side. He knelt down in front of her.
"Baby why are you crying, why are you sat in the dark, baby what's wrong," Edward came closer to Bella, wiping away her tears.
"Edward turn on the light," She sniffs. Edward quickly turns on the light, a sudden gust of light fills Bella's face. She starts to cry more, her gaze stuck on the pregnancy test.
"Bella, baby why are you crying," Edward worried and distressed tone, made it hard for her to speak.
"I'm… I.. Edward," Edward sinks down to Bella's level, taking her in his arms, he holds her tight and slowly rocks her side to side for comfort.
"Pregnant," Edward stops dead, nothing could be heard as they both went silent…
A few tears role down my cheeks, I let them fall too the ground. Even thinking about it now, how I thought a baby would ruin my life, how I thought I wasn't ready for one and that it was too soon, still hurts, mainly because I thought something so amazing and unique as Charlie could be a bad thing.
I sniff a few times and try to distract myself, I look around a room and land my eyes on a clock…. Fifteen minuets had gone by. I go over to the pregnancy test, I had placed them face down, Why did I do that? I role my eyes at myself. Grabbing both of them I turn them over at the same time and look at the result. A smile creep across my face.
I sit on the sofa smugly, eating a pot noodle. I couldn't remove my hand from my tummy, I pat it smoothly and softly, thrilled with the results. The sudden sound of cars pulling up made my smile widen.
"Mommy," Charlie yelled as he came rushing into the house.
"In here sausage," I call out setting my pot noodle down on the table.
"Mommy, I got some pebbles," Charlie waved them around excitedly.
"Come show them too me," I laugh with him, he was always such a happy little boy. I carefully pick him up so that he didn't hit my tummy and place how down next to me. We sit on the couch and play with the rocks he had gotten.
"You're looking up," Edwards voice came to my ears and it made me breath a sigh of happiness. I turn my head, but instead of being embraced by my husband, he just stood there with that Angela woman.
I clear my throat "Yeah," Was my sour reply.
"you ready?" Angela's said sweet and innocently. Made me feel physically sick.
"Uhh yeah sure, I just need to grab my dads keys and we can be off," He smiled at her like he would at me.
"Cool," She smiled and then walked off into the kitchen where Esme was.
"Where are you two going?" I say bitterly.
"She's taking my on a tour of France, you know, since I haven't seen it all in years," He said that like it was my fault.
"Right," Was all I could say too that.
"I have something too tell you-" I say getting up….
"Common, we got to go," Angela's high pitched giggle came from the kitchen. Ohh please.
" Coming," He yells back.
"It can wait right?" He said, like he expected me to be okay with this. I just sit back down, ignoring him all together. No it cant fucking wait.
"Bella?"
"Just go Edward," I sigh. He lets out a sigh and roles his eyes. I didn't even care, to be honest I didn't want to see him for a while after that.
"Well I'll be back about ten," He says to me hopefully.
"Kay," I say blankly. I wasn't about to give in too him, I was pissed that he's all of a sudden ditching his family on a family holiday. He walks off, given up trying to make me smile again.
I stare at the clock on the bedside cabinet. 9:50. I doubt they'll be back by ten, she's probably gone out and showed him a great time, whilst sucking up to my oblivious husband.
"Don't be a stranger now Angela," Edwards voice come from down stairs. Well I'll be, the ass actually came home before he said he would.
I wipe some of the sweat of my forehead and breath slowly until I had calmed down. I really shouldn't be this mad at him, after all its her fault.
"Baby are you still mad at me?" Edward sad voice came from outside the door. I didn't reply, I was still angry at him, that's something I couldn't deny. The door creaked as he stepped inside, and creaked again as he shut the door. I felt like crying, everything in my mind and gut told me too. He dressed quickly and then slowly crawled into bed with me. He placed his chin on my shoulder.
"Baby," I didn't reply, because I was letting a few single tears escape my eyes.
"I'm sorry," He says apologetically.
"Forget It, you don't have to be, do what you want, if you'd rather spend time with her than me, then fine its your choice," I say irritated.
"Bella its not like that," He sighed.
"Yeah alright then," I say blankly. He removed his chin from my shoulder, and then moved away from me. Ohh great. I turn around in the bed, still aware that I was crying and look into his eyes. Once he saw my tears, he bit his lip.
"Bella I'm so sorry," He says, putting a strand of hair behind my ear and moving closer too me.
"You know what got me the most, is that you didn't even have enough time to listen too one thing I had too say too you, you just automatically thought it could wait, like it was nothing." I cry even harder, because a baby isn't just nothing.
"Baby, I'm sorry, I didn't know,"
"Stop saying sorry, it doesn't make anything better," I sob, still looking at him. He moves even closer to me and wraps his hands around my waist.
"Bella I promise you that I'm not going to leave your side unless you want me too," His words made me shake with emotion, we just lay there as I cry into his chest.
"Like I said its fine, its your life, you just want to have fun with a friend,"
"What was it you wanted to tell me?" He says trying to change the subject.
"You know what, it can wait, because I'm not really in the mood too forgive you right now," I sob into his shirt. He still held me close even though I was being horrible and nasty too him.
"Bella please tell me," He begged.
"If you were that interested, you would have listened too me the first time, it probably would have made you stay, but its not like you bothered to listen,"
"Baby there isn't anything I can do right now Is there?" He says doubtfully.
"No, not right now," I say leaning against his chest.
"Goodnight Edward," I say sleepily, I was angry with him, but still I wanted his touch, admittedly I've missed him today.
"Goodnight beautiful," Edward says into my hair. I would have told him, I just don't think he understands how important it really is and how much he's hurt me.
READ&REVIEW please:). Much love and thanks for reading, won't be long before the next chapter is up, I promise:) S.S.4.E x.o.x