Just for the record, I've JUST finished this.
Okay, I'm sure there will be a lot of mistakes since it's 3AM and I've JUST finished this! Sorry. I need to sleep. I decided to post this because I made you wait waaaaay too long last time and even though this time wasn't as long as that one, I thought you guys deserved it (? Anyway, as usual, thank you so much for the reviews, you guys are the best.
This is longer than the others, well, as long as you can get with me. I'm trying to make them extensive and this is what I came up with. I hoe you guys enjoy it and well, review?
How disappointing it is to wake up and realized that NO, I don't own Chuck. Very, very disappointing. Very.
The moment that word, the name of the person she despised more than anything, left his mouth, Sarah completely lost it. She turned around and started yelling at him, missing the look of shock Chuck had on his face.
"Jill?", she spat, her face expressing disgust as if saying the name had left a horrible taste on her mouth (in her mind, it did). "Of course Jill was the one that was at your house", she exclaimed, "in your ROOM after my mom left." Her heart was breaking as the words kept flowing out of her system, her mind imagining the situation with Chuck and Jill and what that implied, but she kept on and without realizing, she started pacing around the living room. "She sure does work fast", she growled and threw her hands in the air, nearly missing a picture on the table next to her, "but I'm sure you didn't complain."
Chuck couldn't keep quiet any longer so he finally took a few steps, ending up very close in her personal space and harshly interrupt her. "Hey, now, I'm not the one that destroyed everything we had." He regretted the words the second his brain caught up with his mouth and realized what he said.
"Don't you dare blame this on me!" she answered him just as harshly, pushing him away from her. Now, she was the one that didn't care at all about his personal space and continued, pointing a finger on his chest. "You are the one that trusted her. The woman who betrayed you in every chance she got!" She said with venom in her voice. "It's like, you really never got over her. Did you even love me at all?" her voice broke slightly and her eyes got glassy. "Because all these years had me thinking, maybe you never loved me, you were just waiting for Jill to come back. It makes sense, doesn't it?" She chuckled to hide the fact that all she wanted to do was run upstairs, lock herself in her room and cry for days. I really hate thinking about her, about us, about our whole situation, let alone talk about it.
"NO!" Chuck all but yelled. "That's not true and you know it!" He gently pulled her away from him but kept eye contact with her. No matter what happened between them, he was not going to allow her thinking that of their time together. "I loved you from the first moment I saw you and our time together was as real as it could get." I never stopped loving you. "And that's why it hurt so much to hear and see in the photos what you did."
She turned away from him, not trusting herself not to break down in front of him when he had that look on his face, when he talked like that and said those words. "Photos? You believed her because she showed you photos? If you had been the smart man I thought you were, you wouldn't have been fooled by some stupid photos anyone could have tricked, especially her with all the technology knowledge or the resources I'm sure she has." She laughed bitterly of that last part. "If you had loved me as you say you did you would have never believed a word she said", Sarah said softly and he almost thought she hadn't meant for him to hear but he did and it broke his heart to hear her sound so defeated. "We can't keep arguing like this. It's been years and we're not even together anymore and you are recently married with her now." Chuck murmured something behind her but she ignored it. "I can't believe this", she felt the sting of unshed tears in her eyes but she wasn't going to let Chuck see her crying so she quickly wiped her eyes with the back of her hands. It was enough as it was that she had cried for years because of him, she wouldn't allow herself to break down in front of him now. It had been a few minutes of silence, at least for her, until she heard him murmuring again and then she realized she had been quiet for quite a while so she slowly turned around to see what he had to say. When she did that, she saw him standing exactly where he had stood before not moving an inch but what was different was the shock in his face and heard him saying "Oh my God" over and over and over again.
"What?" she said with the coldest both look and voice she could muster. When he kept repeating the same thing, she stopped him by shaking him and said, "What?! What's wrong with you?" She had contemplated the idea of slapping him but as angry as she was, and even though she wished she could have done just that for years, she couldn't bring herself to do it. She couldn't bring herself to hurt him and that frustrated her. It was frustrating that after all she'd been through because of him and all these years without actually seeing him, she was reminded of him every day by her children, with their funny expressions, actions or comments, she couldn't hurt him because she still loved him. She almost wanted to scream at that. She was brought back to the present when Chuck finally decided to, not so quietly, explain himself.
"I didn't marry her!" he yelled angrily at her, "I didn't marry her because the moment I saw you I left the altar and went looking for you!" he continued. "After we talked, I spent all afternoon looking for you, asking every single person that walked next to me if they knew you and if they knew where you live!" he started calming down after he saw the look of surprise she had on her face. "I couldn't let you get away from my life again. I couldn't think of anything else other than finding you", he said in that voice, that honest to God voice she missed so much and with a kind look in his eyes that had her melting.
"You… Why? How? Wait, what?" she stammered and had to take a long breath to calm down. "YOU DID WHAT?" Well, that's certainly much better. Sarah thought after she realized what she just shouted. "You ran away from your own wedding?" She whispered and he slowly nodded.
"Apparently, I did", Chuck said. "Like I said, after I saw you, I couldn't think about anything else, I just had to find you. I thought I was never going to see you again." He cleared his throat and went on, "I thought you were going to stay." He looked straight in her eyes and couldn't help to be mesmerized by them. It could have been thirty years without seeing her and I would still feel sort of hypnotized by those baby blue eyes I enjoyed so much getting lost in.
Sarah, for her part, couldn't bring herself to break the stare. She had missed so much just staring at his eyes, those beautiful chocolate eyes she loved so much. It's really not fair that he still has this effect on me. When she finally broke out of stupor, she looked past him, looking God knows what. Mainly just to avoid his eyes so that he couldn't see the emotion in them when she simply responded to what he said, "I couldn't."
By the way she said he knew she wasn't going to give more than that so he simply changed subject. What he came up with, though, didn't make him too happy. "Oh my God, they're going to kill me." Sarah rejoiced in the fact that he hadn't changed that much because she could easily see his 'I'm freaking out' face forming.
"There's probably a good chance of that happening" she blurted out and then saw the widening of his eyes, which she couldn't believe it was possible since they had already been wide enough before she had said that, and quickly said, "I mean, no, I don't think so", she stopped and a contemplative expression appeared on her face. Chuck calmed down by just looking at her calm face. He had always thought her 'thinking face', as he'd like to call it, was adorable. Since her 'thinking face' hadn't changed, his opinion about it hadn't either. "Well, you did run away from your wedding so people will be pissed, at least", Sarah told him and just like that the calmness Chuck had felt flew out of the window and he was back at freaking out.
"I- I have to go", he said. "I'm sorry. I have to go back". Even as he said that, he didn't even make a move for the door.
Tears started forming in her eyes again. "You're going to go back to… to marry her?" She hated herself for that slight break in her voice on that last part.
"What?" He looked so confused that if her heart wasn't suffering so bad it would have had missed a beat for the adorable look on his face. "NO!" he exclaimed, "God, no. I have to go back, I have to talk to Jill first and then I need time to think about how to organize my life now. And also, I need to go back now because nobody knows where I am and I'm sure Ellie must be freaking out and worried sick about me disappearing the way I did. Ellie, remember her?" He said with a smile and continued, "Female version of me? My overprotective sister slash mother? I have to hurry to prevent her from calling the police and declare me as a missing person." He joked and smiled even wider after hearing her soft laugh but then he got serious. He boldly took a step closer to her, grabbed both of her hands and said, "Sarah, I'm leaving now but I'm not leaving you, not this time, not ever again. You get that?" He asked her, and when she didn't answer he decided to not leave until she understood how committed he was now. "Look, you know how I grew up. You know that my dad and my mom left Ellie and me. Our parents, the most important people in our lives, the ones that were supposed to protect us, they left us." He had this sad and pained look on his face that it made her grimace to remember the first time he had talked about his parents with her, how abandoned he had felt, it broke her heart to hear how much he had to suffer from such a young age. "I have already forgiven them but it still doesn't change the fact that we had to grow up without not only a mother but also without a father." Sarah remembered how neurotic yet kind and great person Chuck's father, Steven Bartowski, was. It was sorrowful to find out he was killed by the same man that had tried to kill her. She had also met Chuck's mother, Mary Bartowski, a few months before their break up and had even helped her take down the organization she had been undercover for over twenty years. Sarah looked down while he kept talking, "I'm not going to let my children feel the way I did, not even for a second longer than necessary now that I know about them. I've already missed what? Four, almost five years of their lives, I'm not going to waste any more time." He pulled his left hand away from her and used it to lift her chin. "I will forever regret that I didn't check my room after your mom left but I'd feel even worse if I don't find a way to be part of our children's lives." He squeezed her hand to make sure she understood what he was saying. Sarah looked in his eyes and saw that he was being honest, which didn't surprise her at all. She broke the stare match they found themselves in again by looking at his hand, that hand that comforted her so many times. God, how I missed his touch, she thought as she leaned on his hand a little. "Do you understand now, that this time I'm not abandoning any of you?" She nodded "I will go back, organize a few things and then I'll come back and we'll talk about how we're going to do this, together." A tear escaped her eyes and he gently brushed his thumb over it.
"Together", she repeated. A small smile began to form on her face and it took every ounce of his power not to lean and kiss her. What he didn't know was that Sarah was fighting her own body to prevent her from doing the exact same thing.
The part with Sarah and her helping Mamma Bartowski, it points out that Chuck and Sarah broke up shortly after Volkoff went down but in MY story, Vivian going CRAZY and becoming a bad guy trying to kill Sarah doesn't happen, obviously.
Okay, I'm falling asleep now.