Chapter Four: Jagged Jigsaw
To say that the next morning was awkward was the understatement to end all understatements. The morning after was what Haru and Someina were pretty much infamous for, and only proven again with this one.
She excavated his pantry to pull a cereal box from the shelf, feeling bad about using his food even after he claimed that he was cool with the entire thing. But maybe that was his just his way. And maybe he was acting more comfortable than he felt. No one could tell.
As she pours the chocolaty flakes into Kaiko's favorite bowl, a yawn trumpets somewhere near her head and spooks her into spilling some of the cereal onto the counter.
"Morning," he says, his voice low as a flat note on the verge of a more upbeat transition. "Did you sleep okay?"
Someina bobs her head, closing the flaps of the box and tucking its tab into the slot. But she's plucked completely out of her carefully cultivated facade when he appears behind her again. Almost touching her back from where he's positioned.
She blows out a rushed breath, scared that he was going to go in for the kill when Kaiko could show up any moment. If last night was anything to go by, she had good reason to be. And there were two things very wrong about him kissing her.
One, he wasn't Hatori.
Two, she wasn't Rin.
"Som," he says, all sweet and dark in one tone.
"Som," he whispers into her neck, grazing it with his teeth.
"I need to get into the cabinet for a plate, please."
"Is that all you need?" He taunts, having only received a peck on the lips as the extravagant light fixture hanging from the ceiling turned sideways.
She nods, and it makes him laugh at her insistence.
"Then why are your legs around my waist?"
She peers up at the black and clear cabinet above her, fighting down a blush as she sidestepped for him.
"Sorry."
"You don't have to apologize." He takes a styrofoam plate, shutting the door behind him and shuffling over to the stove. "I'm more concerned about your back."
She drags her nails down his back, too punchy and drunk to care about the noises she was making.
He brings his head down so that he looks her directly in the eyes, glad that he was finally getting a chance with the girl he had a crush on since the year started.
"Are you trying to get me in trouble with your parents?"
She bites down on her lip, only to have him draw it back out with his thumb.
"I didn't say I didn't like it."
"Why? What do you mean?" She stammers. "You were the one standing close. I didn't mean to be in the way."
"I want to do it my way," he murmurs, silencing his name on her lips with his own.
"What?" He asks, laughing. "I was referring to you and Kaiko taking the air mattress. I wish you wouldn't talk me out of you taking my bed."
She holds up her hands in an 'X' and shakes her head. "We can't be in the same bed! I-I have a...boyfriend. And he's great. Fantastic! So, I really can't do that. No siree."
He strides over, slow enough to allow her heart to shut down and fully reboot again before he finally arrives.
"I was saying you two should have my room by yourselves while I camp out on the mattress. Unless..." he tips his head downward so that he's staring right at her, his dark eyes telling of no certainties. "This is your way of saying that you shouldn't want it, but you really do." At her red face he cleans it up. "Want my bed, that is."
"You seem different," Someina slurs, tracing a finger from his chest to his stomach, both still recovering from how quickly their lives had just changed. "You seem like another person...you're a lot more aggressive than I thought you would be."
He brings the hot pink comforter up over their bodies, his necklace swinging wildly with the motion.
"I could say the same about you," he retorts, referring to the red that marked where her nails had been.
She lazily sticks her tongue out at him, eyes still refusing to open out of exhaustion. "You act like you didn't enjoy it."
He takes her into his arms in one quick movement, resting his chin atop her head as sleep accosted him.
"Believe me...I did."
He's standing so close with only an inch gap of space that barely keep their hips from meeting. And the weight of his presence makes her eyes grow heavy enough to close, unable to look at him while breathing in the scent of peppermint and soap.
She awakens to a room flooded with luminosity, an overdose of brightness that she can't handle so early in the morning. She squeezes her eyes shut, attempting to block out the ferocity of light that surrounds her, knowing that getting up and going to work seemed out of the question with how badly her head was hurting.
It was so strong...familiar...
The girl sidesteps until she makes it safely around the double bed without waking up her classmate, before practically sprinting into the bathroom and locking the door behind her.
Someina rips herself away from him like velcro separating, quickly gathering a towel and a loofa. "I'll just go take a shower, now." And like a coward, she makes a break for the bathroom and locks it as soon as she can. But just like a coward...she takes no shame in running.
...
The moment Som and her friends waltz into the posh and out-of-budget shoe boutique, a bell dangling over the door chimes. Their group bee-lining in search of a clearance aisle.
It had been an eventful morning between herself and Haru, but she figured some time out of the house with friends would manage to ground her again.
A woman in black stockings, matching kitten heels, and a blazer draped over her slinky dress, shoved a foot measurement tool aside. Straightening to her full height that rivaled Uo's.
"What are you doing in a place like this?" She asks with a snooty sneer in her voice. "We are not Goodwill, if that's what someone told you."
"Not at all," Someina responds, before Uo can tell her off. "But would you mind pointing us to your discounts? We can't seem to find them."
"That's because there is no negotiation here. You take it as is or you do the poor walk of shame. What do we look like? Salvation Army?"
Hana narrows her eyes at the grumpy lady, not taking kindly at all to the way her words flooded with condescension.
"If you were a charity of some sort, I would pity those that come to you in need of it. You stand here in your high heels with not a hair out of place. Yet, you somehow put yourself beneath anyone that couldn't afford this establishment with your attitude."
She draws back with an audible huff, her pride wounded with being chastised. "Pardon me?"
Uo scoffs, rolling her eyes. "Just show us the shoes and no one gets hurt." She taps her wristwatch. "Time is wasting."
Tohru clasps her hands behind her back, breaking out her signature outfit of worry. "We would all like something classy—"
"Daring," Hana supplies.
"Hot," adds Uo.
"Reasonable," Someina amends, earning the woman's hateful Medusa gaze. "Under 100 in cost."
In the past, Someina had no need to be frugal or finagle a deal. She didn't have to beg and plead or wait for a sale. All she had to do was flash daddy's credit cards and she came home with a season worth of outfits.
Now financially cut off and prioritizing Kaiko in expenses, she had to learn her way around work sales clerks. Even when it meant fighting dirty.
"Oh? Did you not get the memo?" She asks innocently. "I'm Someina, Heiress of the Fujimotos. You've heard of my parents' business haven't you?"
The woman's entire demeanor changes, a smile painting her face like a court jester. "They're icons. Anyone with air in their lungs have heard of them."
"Then you see why I need you, or rather...why you need to cut me some slack. Think of all the traffic I could bring to your store if you were to sell me something. Knock off the price for the sake of my friends, and I guarantee that people will be chomping at the bit to shop here. Think of it as an endorsement deal."
She actually buys into it and ponders the proposition. Bait and switch.
"Solid offer. But, why would money be an issue if you're really her?"
Someina turns up her nose, smoothing out invisible wrinkles in the outfit that made her look more rich than she was.
"Don't you get it? Its a favor for my friends. I can see the interview now. Posh Pumps treats customers like friends, and caters to the rich and famous like family."
Her eyes sparkle like the diamonds Someina's mother and sister sported for things as simple as reading in bed, before she nods and gives a grand sweep of her hand towards the store.
"Feel free to peruse our vast and fashionable selection. And its no trouble at all if there's any questions you want to ask."
The woman stalks off, and Uo mutters under her breath.
"I have a question; did you bargain for those extensions with your stank attitude? I'd ask her to take several seats. But she probably wouldn't..." Uo shakes her head, fixing her voice to mock the woman's "...because they're not designer."
Someina snorts, clapping a hand over her mouth. "Uo, that's not nice...hilarious, but not nice."
Uo shrugs, leading the way towards pumps in all shapes and sizes and inches. "She's not exactly Miss Universe, herself. I mean, did you see the way she tried to kill us with her eyes, then bring us back to life with her fake smile? What a total snake."
Someina picks up a pair of black and silver pumps, wrinkling her nose at how high they were. "Miss Universe is a cool thing for bragging rights. But beauty pageants aren't all they're cracked up to be. And that's coming from someone that won five."
"You were a beauty queen?" Tohru squeals, clapping. "You mean you got to wear a crown and sash and everything?"
"And heels," She adds. "Lots and lots of heels. Which is why I can't stand them now."
Someina puts the pair back into its snug box, scanning the shelves for a new pair of flat shoes. Maybe even something a little bit outside her comfort zone. Like flip-flops or boots.
"I gotta give you your props, Meina," Uo says, throwing her a thumbs-up. "You were a total baddie pulling that off. Your scheme would make the best conman shed a tear."
Was that praise she should be championing or fearing?
"Only when necessary..." she trails off, tucking her dark hair behind her ear.
"Did you guys hear?" Uo fires off, examining a set of colorful Converse. "Kureno wants us to change up where we go on dates. Can you believe that?"
"You mean he doesn't want to go to a dive bar with truckers and peanut shells all over the floor anymore?" Someina teases. "Has he been to a doctor recently? He might have a fever."
Hana smiles at this as Uo gives her petite friend one of her hard slaps on the back. "Someone's sassy today, aren't we Meina?"
All of a sudden, her face lights up. And she barks out a laugh at her own thoughts. "I've got it. Mean Meina gets even mean...ah."
Someina shakes her head. "And to think that I used my family name for you. Betrayal is real."
"That was rather interesting wasn't it," Hana muses, running her dark purple nails over the price tag of really expensive stilettos. "You told us that you never wanted to be known as a Fujimoto after what happened."
She winces. "I don't. But I can't stand that people look down on me or anyone that doesn't have money to claim. So in addition to helping you guys out, I also want to get back at my mom who is sure to hear about this through the grapevine." She scowls, putting another shoe back. "That woman's network reaches from Tokyo to Los Angeles, Moscow to Sydney. She'll know within a day or two if she's too busy to hear at her normal pace."
"Power to ya," Uo rallies. "She's the worst."
"Revenge isn't the answer," Tohru butts in. Her earnest countenance making Someina want to confess every horrible thing that's ever crossed her mind today. "It only hurts you to try to exact it on someone."
"Justice is the ideal," Hana says. "But we do support you if you ever wish to vent or express any other volatile emotions you hold onto."
Those words seem to rip off the veil of her self-preservation, and it scares her into grabbing random shoes and walking it to the checkout. "I'll take these." Someina calls back over her shoulder, "Hurry up snails. I want to buy these before I have to switch to Orthopedic."
...
Someina proposed an idea one rainy Saturday evening in November to put together a 300 piece puzzle, with just the family. The idea was to get to know each other better by asking a random question every-time they fit a piece of the puzzle.
So far, it was easygoing.
"Okay, question one," Haru begins, crossing his ankles in front of him. "Would you survive one night camping in the wilderness?"
Someina plants her fists on her hips from where she sits. "I think you and I haven't been formally introduced." She tosses her hair back, trying to hold her composure and not crack a single smile. "I'm a decorated girls' scout, with camping as my first official badge."
He lets out a breath, clapping lamely. "That seriously moves me, Som. You do our country proud by selling us those thin mint cookies." He rubs his very flat stomach. "I think I'm in love."
She rolls her eyes, assuming he's not the least serious. "Yeah, right. There's no way you could be that fit and put away boxes of cookies like that."
He searches the pile for another fit, smiling to himself. "You noticed?"
She looks away so fast she makes whiplash look like a merry-go-round. "You should really have them cold. Pop them in the fridge for a couple of hours and then eat them. But I liked Samoas and Do-Si-Dos the most."
"Peanut butter cookies? Stop the madness, Someina." He flops on his back and Kaiko pounces on him with a squeal of glee, tugging at his pierced ear. "You're so dangerous."
"Oh, hush." Someina grabs for a nearby sofa cushion, plucking at its threads. "You're just jealous I had discounts and you wished you could ever be so cool."
He chuckles, sitting up with Kaiko's arms tight around his neck. "You're not wrong."
She tucks a piece of the ocean waves in its place, connecting two others together. "I'm surprised you didn't ask about when I stopped being able to have cookies."
His lips are tugged by a smirk. "What do you want me to say? That I'm so sweet I gave you diabetes? I'm not the type."
She laughs, feeling a little sillier. "I suppose you make a valid point."
"Thanks." He shrugs. "That and the fact it wasn't my turn. But it is yours."
She jolts slightly, having forgotten that. "Oh yeah..."
Should she start off personal or flirt around with small talk to see how close she could get?
"What's the best and worst movie you've ever seen?"
He strokes his chin and squints, causing Kaiko to bubble over with another giggle fest. "Hmm...that could count for two questions, but I'll let it slide because Kaiko's here."
She drops the pillow and resorts to tugging at the carpet, instead. "What a gentleman."
"The worst movie I've seen was this one film from back when I was around...Kaiko's age? Yeah. Probably five or six. It was this really weird killer clown movie about them going around attacking people until there was no one left...No one but people with painted on smiles and rainbow wigs." He shudders.
"You don't like clowns?" Someina asks, her eyebrows greeting her hairline.
"That's an understatement," he admits, eyes unfocused like he truly was scarred. "But the best movie I've ever watched was about a guy and a girl that decide to break up to drum up publicity for their music careers—"
"—But end up quitting the business and running off together. I remember."
He smiles warmly, and it feels like her heart has been shoved into an oven and is being gently torched. They watched that rom-com with Momiji on their studying break all those years ago. Her memory of that night came back to her in splotches ever since. And the more she recalled despite the hazy edges, the more she had to distract herself.
She didn't want to say that she had no self-control when he was involved, past or present. But...
The next time they were alone—
"I did it mama," Kaiko proclaims, springing off of Haru's lap to dance in victory. "I did two pieces."
Two? Is that really how long they've been sitting here and saying nothing?
"Let's hear it," Haru encourages.
"Um! What is your...favorite stuff animal?"
"Mr Tux," Haru answers immediately. "Its a grey kitten with black buttons for eyes and a pink nose. I once cut up my dad's suit to give him an outfit, and that's how he got his name."
"Ooh," Kaiko coos, pursing her lips in thought. "I have Princess. You and Mr Tux and mama can all come to the tea party. Oh!" She points at Someina. "Mama can bring Cookie The Bunny."
She flushes, strategically avoiding his eyes.
To Haru's credit, he doesn't point and laugh. "Cookie, huh? We haven't met."
"That's b-because its...Hey, Kaiko. Don't you have a second thing to ask us?"
"I go again...?" She pauses, until an idea lights up her entire body like a Christmas display. "I got one! I got one!" Kaiko flails her hand around, bouncing up onto her knees.
"What is it, then?" Someina asks.
"Do you and daddy love each other?"
Someina focuses her attention on finding another corner piece, knowing the edges of the puzzle were the easiest points to start.
And the best distraction.
"I like your mom," Haru says, and it makes her freeze. "She's an intelligent, beautiful, sweet person who makes me laugh. She's also the hardest worker I've ever seen, and I dig that."
She grabs a random puzzle piece, enamored by his words and the sprinkle of emotion in them. "That's...wow, Haru. I have no clue what to say about that."
He smiles softly. "I know. I don't know what to say to me most the time, either."
Kaiko huffs, pout in full effect. "That's not what I said. I said love. Where you kiss and hug and stuff."
Haru opens his mouth to speak, but Someina's blabbing is faster. "We're friends, sweetie. Just good friends that love you," she says, bringing her into her arms and flooding her daughter with kisses. Causing her to laugh loud and smile big, Someina's favorite kind.
"My turn," Haru says, forming more of the water beneath Prince Eric and Ariel's boat. "What's a hidden talent of yours?"
She pauses, needing to run while being glued in place by his loaded question.
Deep breath in, she says, "Ballet." Her shoulders shrug on their own to make it seem more unimportant than it was. "Its something I did that doesn't happen anymore."
"That's sad."
All of a sudden, every muscle in her body tenses up. Like another person was judging her for her life choices. "How is that sad?"
"I won't get to see you perform." He twists his bracelet, thoughts spinning. "Maybe that's stupidly selfish, but...its something in the way you walk, like the world is made of glass and you know all the weak spots to avoid." He looks at her with awe leaping in his eyes. "I don't doubt that you were a great dancer."
She stares at him, and he stares right back. And it hits her hard that this is really him. That he's really the man that touched her like delicate toes on polished floors. But she wasn't polished. She was coming undone, and she wanted him to be the one to unravel her. He made disasters and messy things sound like they deserved displays for the beauty of their chaos, instead of hiding from them.
"You're my first kiss," he admits, lips upturned in a smile that was afraid to be fully happy. "I'm glad I remember it."
She can't help but wilt with the longing and regret plucking away at her. "You weren't my first kiss. But...you were my best."
You were my favorite kiss.
The smile finally happens and its stunning, and his dark eyes are so heavy it feels like they pin her to the floor. And she wants them to.
"Can I ask you something else?" He tips his head towards the puzzle, showing that he found a piece of red hair.
"Yes."
"Why are you different around me than him?"
She blinks a few times. "What?"
His head lolls to the side, like he's not ready for the followup and wishing he hadn't asked. "That's not the right way to put it. I meant to ask why you're so tense when it comes to him.
"You act like he's a headmaster, you're the troublemaker, and you have to be on your best behavior or he'll strike you down."
Her eyebrows draw together a familiar frown makes its appearance. "That's not even—you don't even know how I act with him. You saw us on one date. Without even considering I had a bad night or that he did."
"You seemed uncomfortable with him and I just wanted to know why you stay together."
"Why?"
"Because I don't understand why I'm in a relationship I know is messed up," he says, taken aback by his own volume. He spares a glance at Kaiko, checking to see if he scared her to find her busy with the puzzle. Fascinated by Ariel's vibrant hair. He looks back at Someina, needing someone to listen. "I don't know what I'm doing with you or her or school or work. And it feels like its driving me insane." He pulls at the collar of his sweater. "I can't breathe around her or when I think about what's next."
"And me?"
He looks at her, resigned and sorrowful. "You and Kaiko are the only people that make me want to keep breathing, and you somehow always jump-start me into breathing again."
Earthquakes tear through her body in tremors, except its not fear or nerves. But something she never sees coming.
Anticipation.
"How did you get that scar?" She deflects, not ready for their weighty conversation to continue.
Instead of brooding or demanding that their discussion not be finished, he smiles. And its an inviting lift to his lips that makes her relieved to have asked a non-invasive, timely question.
Maybe he knew things were going too far, too.
"A motorcycle accident when I flew off and missed getting struck by a semi by this much," he explains, pinching his fingers together. "It hurt like crazy, but it makes me look tough. So there's that."
She snorts, tapping a puzzle piece against her bare thigh. "That's some consolation prize for taking a spill." She averts her eyes as he rolls up the back of his shirt to show the jagged edges of his scar. "You're not going to do anything like popping wheelies and things now are you?"
She looks back just in time to see him pull his shirt back down, his eyes heavy with something peculiar.
"Never on purpose would I do that to Kaiko..." at Someina's fallen expression, he reaches a hand out and cups her chin. And it makes tears spring to her eyes. "I wouldn't do it to you, either," he whispers.
She stares into his grey eyes until the tear surge is too strong to continue looking. She shrinks away from him and swipes at the wetness on her cheeks. Confused as to why she felt so bad all of a sudden. Like a stranger in her own life.
"Som?" He asks, his eyebrows pulling in when he hears her sniffle. "What's wrong?"
"I d-don't know," she says, her voice warbling as she feels Kaiko scramble into her lap. Her tiny hands bringing her mother's face towards hers.
"Mama sad again?"
Haru scoots closer with these words, causing Kaiko to turn towards him.
"Again? What made you sad before?"
Someina sighs, looking to the ceiling to force the sadness back inside. Knowing better than this. That she was never supposed to let anyone see her at her worst. Its how she was raised.
"I'm fine, I just-" she brings her eyes back down with steeled nerves, daring herself to not cower. "I don't really cry. Maybe I'm overdue or something, and it just came out. We can go back to the puzzle."
"Overdue? You're not a library book, Som. If you hardly ever cry...the fact that you just did speaks volumes. It means that you're in pain and it finally reached its breaking point. Whatever the reason is." He pauses, thinking back to what might have triggered it. "Was it my scar? Or...the fact I got hurt?"
She chews her lower lip, knowing it went way beyond that. To something she was afraid to acknowledge about herself. A thrill-hungry beast inside her only growing larger with the more things she did against her parents' wishes.
Things that made her happy.
"You have my word not to be reckless anymore." He moves in even further so that their knees touch with Kaiko right in the middle. "I'm not exactly father material. And seeing what you do and how you take care of our daughter, it makes me realize that...I'm afraid of it. The responsibility of my presence possibly doing damage because I don't know how to be a great dad. Its actually terrifying.
"But, I think that spending time with you and her more than beats out that fear. I just need you to trust that I'll be more careful. I don't want you worrying every time I get on my bike."
"Okay," she says, even though its not the root of what's really bothering her. "But can you do something else for me?"
He smiles, brushing a hand over Kaiko's head until she's leaning into his touch. "Anything."
"Please don't try to make me feel things I don't want to feel."
Don't make me miss being with you.
"Like expecting me to cry when I'm not ready to."
He's silent like heartbreak, his expressions loud like a breakup. But he eventually caves, giving a small nod to allow her those bounds.
"On the same condition that when you do give yourself over to what you feel, that you'll go to me. And give me a chance to be there."
She bobs her head, unable to say otherwise. "Deal."
...
The following evening...
Someina finds herself caught in the net of yet another red light, the third one in a row on the way back from the grocery store. Haru was right next to her in her on-the-mend sedan, the only reason why she was laughing more than complaining about her timing.
"His face was priceless," he says, pressing his fingers to his lips as he laughs without abandon. "We even rigged it to play nursery music on Bluetooth speakers and hid it in the room so he could never find it."
"Wow." She quickly sucks in her lip, though a stream of giggles still slips through. "I could never pull something like that on my boss. Though, its not to say I haven't considered it."
He turns towards her, throwing his arm around her headrest. "You just get better and better the more we talk. I—"
He squints out the driver's window, causing Someina to tear her gaze from him to a black Bugatti right beside them. It was hard to see through the tint on his windows in the late night, until he rolled them down. Peering at the two with his wrist resting on the wheel covered in flame decals, his shades tipped down to the bridge of his nose.
His engine revs once, twice. His devious smile saying something in a language only Haru understood.
"I think he wants to race," he translates, collapsing back into his seat. "As soon as the light turns green, he's going to take off."
She starts to panic a little. "Race? What should I do? Isn't that illegal?"
He gives a half-shrug, glancing at her through his peripherals. "Just ignore him. You don't have to do it, you know?"
Someina couldn't entirely explain to you why she decided to do what she did, next. Especially with how risky it was with her car in repair limbo and how dangerous it was to drag race. But the moment the light switched from stop to go...
She blasted off, slamming down on the accelerator until Haru had to reach up for the safety handle, and the squeal of the tires were only drowned out by her yelping at the top of her lungs and exhaling adrenaline.
She, a little thing in a white cardigan, black mini-skirt and ballet flats was practically speeding with happiness humming in her veins as she realized why they call them joyrides. Because racing and Haru were the gateway, and adrenaline was the drug.
"Som, you're going at 70 right now! He looks like he's just a spec in the mirror," he shouts over the engine, his grin so wide that it makes him seem like a delighted boy on his birthday.
She kept going and didn't stop until she could no longer see the Bugatti in her side view mirror, gradually dropping her speed as her heartbeat finally stopped climbing up. Her chest rose and fell with the wild sensation tingling all the way down to her bones as Haru chuckled beside her.
"That was intense. And incredible." He angles himself towards the ballerina that just earned her racing stripes, feeling every bit as proud as if she won a Grand Prix. "I had no idea I was riding with a total boss."
She clutches the wheel tighter, still trembling with the rocket power shooting up her arms and down her legs.
"I didn't either."
...
The next afternoon after her early morning shift, Haru, Kaiko, and Someina make their way through the Fall Faire that breezed into town just last week. There were booths in place to bob for apples, shoot water guns at targets, and pie eating contests. Apple of course. They all stop in the middle to decide what to do first.
"What are you interested in?" Haru asks, before glancing down and tugging lightly at Kaiko's hand. "You hungry, Kaiko?"
"Yeah!" She yelps, dark eyes glowing with the neon lights above their heads. "I want candy apple."
He smiles, swinging their joined arms and starting towards a food stand. "Candy apples it is."
Someina pulls her light jacket around her tighter, regretting that she hadn't bundled up more before stepping out of the house. At least she did for Kaiko. Kaiko looked about as cozy as Haru did in his leather jacket and sweater. What she wouldn't do to be toasty right now.
They arrive in front of the food stall, and she scans the chalk menu propped up on the counter. They had churros, caramel and candy apples, hot cocoa, and...
Hot apple cider. That sounded magnificent.
And it was exactly that as she sipped it from a styrofoam cup (hers unsweetened, of course), following Haru and Kaiko to a mirror maze. It was so crispy that if you could taste Fall, this would be the drink.
"Do you want to borrow my jacket?" Haru questions, one hand around his own cup of cider, and his other arm wrapped around their daughter's shoulders.
"No thank you," She says. "I feel warmer already with my drink."
He looks at the shivering brunette blankly, and its more reprimanding than a scowl. "You're shivering and your teeth are chattering like dentures."
She cants her head. "Do dentures even chatter?"
He shrugs. "Either way, you're still cold. And I still am offering you my jacket."
Someina takes a long gulp, delaying her answer until she couldn't.
What would it look like to wear it?
There were two things that made her heart thrash around at the thought.
One, it seemed like she was his girl.
Two, she's always wanted to have one of her own. And she's not so sure that she'll be able to hand it over after they leave.
"Hard pass. But, again, thanks."
He rolls his eyes, pulling his arms behind his back as he removes it anyway, holding it out to her. "Som, if you won't take it because it means something...it does."
It does?
"It means that you're as stubborn as you are cold, and that I won't let you be uncomfortable."
She half-snorts, half-laughs. Not at all expecting that. "Well, when you put it that way, how can I turn you down?"
He nods, taking the liberty to toss it over her shoulders and smooth it down. "I learned from the best. My friend's a future attorney."
She beams, abuzz with joy as he takes her hand and Kaiko's, having already downed his cider as they walk up to the ticket master. Giving him two stubs to get into the house of mirrors.
It was rigged so that if you passed by certain areas, it would initiate a loud buzz to give you a jump scare. Something that may or may not have made Someina dig her nails into Haru's hand when she wasn't busy flinching like it was her job. Something she refuses to confirm or deny because her five year old didn't even bat an eye.
Kaiko runs ahead, turning left and they call after her. Someina runs after her with Haru not far behind, though they end up looping back around and getting separated. Leaving her to her devices as five different reflections mimicked her every move.
Someina wraps her arms around herself as she creeps along, chills somehow dotting her skin despite how warm and comfortable Haru's jacket was. She forces herself onward until she suddenly stumbles forward, startled out of her mind as an explosively loud buzz erupts in her ear. She catches herself by pressing her hands flat against the glass, a larger body pressing against hers as quick breaths fog up the mirror.
"Som, I was looking for you and Kaiko. I don't even know how we split up." He sighs. "Its not the first time I got lost, though."
She closes her eyes and tries to take in breaths normally, her heart squeezing and contracting in all the excitement. "Right...where's Kaiko?"
"I think she might be outside." He peels himself off the small woman, helping her out with him. "Let's go look."
They find their daughter huddled up against the wooden column near the ticket master, and Someina feels proud and relieved that she did what she was taught if she ever got lost. Though her mother had no procedure in place for how she would react if it happened.
"Kaiko!" She races to her and picks her up, hugging her to herself. "I'm so sorry we didn't stay together. It was mama's fault."
Kaiko rubs her eyes, and it makes Someina that much more upset. "Its okay, mama. You were just a scaredy cat. I get scared sometimes, too."
"I'm sorry for not watching you both, better," Haru adds. "And for not suggesting something we could all do. I didn't think to ask if you thought it was too scary. I'm sorry."
"Its not your doing." She expels a breath, rolling her shoulders back. "Let's just start over at something else. I hear they have a mechanical bull and hayrides."
Haru coughs, trying to hide a sudden onslaught of chuckles.
She pins him with a bemused look. "Glad you find my panic hilarious, Mr. Take-My-Jacket-My-Dear-Damsel."
"You patronized yourself, Som. Not me."
She taps her foot, attempting to not laugh with him. "You were saying?"
As soon as she lets Kaiko down, he picks her up and throws Kaiko over his shoulder fireman style.
"Whee! Again! Again!"
Haru pivots so that he's towering over Someina again, coming practically toe-to-toe.
"I just find it morally wrong that you want me, a moo cow, to ride a bull. Isn't that sick, Kai?"
Kai?
"Yeah!" She chirps, staring up at her mother as they trek through piles of leaves to the petting zoo.
"See." Haru smirks. "She agrees with me."
Someina scoffs. "As if she understands a word of what you said. Agrees with you...yeah right," she grumbles the last part under her breath.
Haru's smirk melts into a grin, before he swings Kaiko back up onto his shoulders so that she sits atop them. Spotting brown, black, and cream colored ponies in the distance.
"We gotta hurry if we want to catch a Unicorn."
Kaiko covers his eyes with her hands, making Som crack up at how he starts stomping like a giant, arms stretched out in front of him.
"Unicorns only live on rainbows," she corrects him, yanking her hands back before he can bite her fingers. "Not in gold pokeys."
"Pfft, its where I met Princess Pony. You know that."
"No."
"Yeah."
"No!"
"Yeah!"
Someina looks back and forth between them, confused and amused at their exchange. But she wanted to be apart of it, too.
"Actually, Unicorns probably wouldn't appear anywhere near here," she says, earning one baffled look and one that pleaded with her to use her imagination. "Uh...I mean, they belong in a castle. With princesses like you."
Kaiko sticks her lip out in thought. "Castles have rainbow bridges." She faces forward again, finding herself content in that answer. "Mama knows Unicorns. Daddy only pretends."
Someina struts up to them, trying not to look too pleased with herself. "Someina - 1. Haru - 0."
He narrows his eyes. "Its like that?"
"Yup," she says, hip-checking him. "I may not look like much...but I can be savage when I want to be."
He groans, his head tipping back. "Please tell me you didn't just say that. Please tell me my hearing's just going because I'm getting old."
"What?" She elbows him, waggling her eyebrows. "You think I'm too elegant and uptight to roast you? You're mad wrong, broski."
He smacks a hand to his forehead. "I'll buy you a motorcycle if you stop right now. Please."
She pauses, half-way considering this. It wasn't what people like her friends or boyfriend would expect her to like. Heck, she thought the same. But lately...what she thought she liked and didn't were turning upside down.
"Alright, I'll stop." She holds up her hands, walking backwards so he can see she's serious. "And you don't even have to buy me anything."
Though it would be nice.
He acts like he's swiping sweat from his forehead. "Good. Now let's go see a Unicorn."
"Pony," Kaiko and Someina chime in unison.
"Okay. Let's go see a pony."
...
Hatori and Someina have seats up in the nosebleeds of the Peacocks' home game, stranded in a sea of people with foam fingers and team colors. Whenever the Peacocks gained more downs or scored a touchdown, their side of the stadium was soaked in triumph. Roaring like a thousand eagles taking flight with calls of majestic tour de force. Protecting their territory, their turf. But fumbles, tackles, and foul plays...they made everyone antsy as the numbers kept going up for the opposing team, while the home team's remained static.
"How is Kaiko doing?" Hatori asks, going through his wallet for something. "I remember she had a quiz on the five senses a few days ago."
Someina looks at him in surprise, truly not expecting him to retain something he might think minor. "Thank you for asking. She did really well. She passed with flying colors. But the best thing is that she likes her teacher and made a new friend."
He nods, handing her a handful of bills. "Glad to hear that."
His girlfriend curiously stares down at the large amount he's offering. "What's this for?"
"Allowance for a job well done." He indulges in a genuine half-smile, reaching for her hand to have her accept it. "Its right to reward good academics and proper behavior."
"But...I'd feel kind of indebted if I took this. Even on her behalf, its too much Hatori."
"Please let me do this one thing. Use it to buy her new clothes or books, I just want to help out."
She reluctantly tucks it away into her purse, flashing him a grateful smile.
"Thank you. You have no idea how helpful you're being." Even though she still feels bad for it.
"No problem."
Someina retrains her gaze on the field, just in time to see one of the opposing team's players running the ball right past theirs.
"D-up! D-up!" She shouts, standing in the bleachers with her hands cupped around her mouth. "You're leaving yourself wide open!"
She shares in a groan with the face painted audience, slumping back down into her seat beside Hatori. He was watching Someina more than the game, his one green eye attempting to read her like the scoreboard. And it was honestly no different considering they were both disappointments.
"You're not having a good time, are you?" She asks, picking at her week-old French manicure.
"Not really, no." He sighs and she wants to sigh with him. Cleary, inviting him to watch one of her favorite spectator sports was one of her worst ideas yet. He was cashing in his rain check, and she had a few traces of hope left that she might be able to show him this side of her. And that he would like who she was. Apparently, the only way to get him to bond with her was if she were ailing or surrounded by beakers and microscopes.
"What's the matter?" Someina asks, resting her chin in the palm of her hand. "The sucky plays, or the burnt food?"
Shock strips a couple years off his face at her speech, and she's not at all apologetic this time. Put her around him anywhere else; the cafe', at dinner, or even at her place and she was merely polite and hardly expressive. But take her to see a game or a ballet, and she was just as vocal as a PMS'ing girl with road rage.
He manages to pull together his usual stoic look, folding his hands together in his lap. "I'm baffled as to how someone can profit off of concussions and compound fractures that contact athletics inevitably lead to. How this can be enjoyable for you eludes me."
She smooths her hands over her black leggings, finding another effort wasted as he didn't care to compliment her once. She understood being respectful and not making lewd comments, but she was beginning to believe he wasn't attracted to her at all.
"Life is full of risks like those. Its fascinating how strong they become when goal oriented to protect their teammates and share the glory of touchdowns and winning catches." She claps a hand over her heart. "Their drive and passion and rhythm make me want to root for them. Even when they lose. They put us right there with them in the middle of the action, and we dump sports drinks on them and hoist them on our shoulders when we all revel in their victory."
What she can see of his forehead creases in some emotion that wasn't easy to recognize. But whatever it was meant that this wasn't going well.
"But I ask if all that is worth being carried out on a stretcher when your aspirations die on the field because your risks are what killed them." He scowls when one of the players is tackled and his chin slams against the turf, though it only deepens when the football rookie is helped to his feet and given a slap on the butt. "How barbaric is it to act like primal beings whenever people compete?"
Someina grabs her soda from its cup holder and sips, annoyed that Dr Killjoy was dampening the fun and love she has for this game with his logic. She could kind of see the flawed logistics of the game, but it was the way they were so brave, bold, and strong that thrilled her. And because they could get dirty without caring who saw or what they thought. They got to be themselves doing what they loved with the mentorship of their coach, and the support of their brothers in jerseys.
Then she glances at him and thinks about why they're dating to begin with, what she intended to accomplish...and she sucks in a breath, shaking her cup to jostle the ice and get more liquid in her straw.
You got this, Someina. Change the subject before you forget how to be the easy, cooperative girlfriend.
"The leaves look beautiful this time of year," she points out, smiling prettily and hoping to win him back over with it. "They're nice yellows and oranges and reds. The auburn leaves are my absolute favorites."
That they were. Haru and Kaiko had their preferences in apples and highlighters. Som? She found red fall leaves to be the most aesthetically pleasing part of autumn. It made her want to dance in them and make music in the ways she stepped on them with her galoshes.
"They are," he finally assents, pulling his gaze away from the game to her. "But winter always comes. And with it, the leaves wither away and night takes over. Here today...gone tomorrow."
This is not the man she thought she was dating. Yes, he was a downer when they first met. But after some time of being colleagues, he slowly cracked open and she saw some of the sweetness inside. Now it was as if he was retreating into himself, again. And it all transpired after-
After she told him that Haru was back in her life. She just hadn't told him that he was here to stay.
That won't be ugly at all.
She fakes a smile and crosses one leg over the other, suddenly feeling too casual with a man that never wore anything as crazy as a plain t-shirt and sweats. Back to Someina of the Fujimotos it was.
"Looks like they're not going into overtime. I suppose its for the better so that we can leave for home." She peeks up at him, internally deflated that he doesn't even notice that she switched up attitudes to appease him. "I would like to stop by for coffee tomorrow morningand make it up to you for dragging you to something you don't enjoy. I should know your tastes better than that."
But she's not so sure she wants to.
He nods, rising up and helping her out of her seat in the process to follow him up the stairs. His hands falling right into his pockets the moment she's steady, like he doesn't even want to hold her hand at all. When with Haru, it was the one thing they did that made her want his hands in other places.
"That would be lovely. I'll be sure to buy something we can eat if you make the espresso."
She bobs her head silently, not caring that he can't see.
She'd really hoped this was a chance for their relationship actually making her happy, instead of keeping her on her toes like painful ballet shoes. But it looked like both would remain hard reminders of who she was, and whom she had to stay to be back in her family's good graces.
...
On the other side of town, Haru beats on Rin's dark wooden apartment door. Loud and proud rock music blasting through the walls and spilling into the hallway. It was sad that his favorite song was playing as he came to deliver news she'd want to shove right back down his throat until he choked on it. He figured if it weren't for the fact he gave it to her good in bed, she'd castrate him quicker than he could say 'sorry.'
"Come in," Rin says, leaving the door wide open as she made her way back into the itty bitty kitchen. He kicks off his boots, though he's not sure he'll be staying long enough, seating himself on her stuffed couch in front of a massive painting. She didn't own a single TV because it was all boring or cliche, and she made fun of it too much to hear anything.
Instead, it was just the squiggles on white canvas that her mom boasted of being a priceless piece crafted by a famous artist. Imagine her surprise when it started to grow on her until she eventually forgot it was there.
"If you're here about your credit card bill, I'm done bleeding you dry." She brings him a plate piled high with grilled cheese, sitting cross-legged beside him with a vegan version. "My mom finally decided to stop being horrible long enough to wire me my funds back."
Haru nods stoically, knowing this is one of those rare moments they felt like friends who didn't argue.
"I'm just glad you didn't resort to shoplifting after you couldn't buy those harlequin novels of yours."
She scowls, slapping him on the shoulder. "Shut up. I wouldn't touch those with a ten foot pole."
He smirks. "Says the woman with signed copies."
She scoffs, taking an angry bite of her non-dairy cheese and whole wheat sandwich. Comfortable beside a man she enjoyed far more than she let on.
Maybe someday she'd say it. The big 'L' that meant rings and chapels and babies. But not unless he said it first.
"Rin." He swallows, wishing he had a glass of something strong to wash his fear down. "In high school, before we started dating...there was—"
"—Let me guess," she cuts him short, setting her mostly untouched plate down. "Your ex is psycho and wants to get back with you, but you're with me and you're warning me ahead of time."
He coughs, his food nearly going down the wrong pipe. "No. Nothing like that. You really are reading novels in your spare time, aren't you?"
She rolls her eyes. "Cut to the chase before Christmas."
He dusts his hands of crumbs, nervous when she confiscates his plate and holds onto it. Would she smash it on his head until he forgot he was a dad in the first place?
"I have a daughter with someone from Kaibara High. It was a one-night thing, but now we have another class together. And since I have a flexible schedule, I agreed to tune her car and have her stay with me until—"
Something shatters.
Rin breathes hard from where she stands, his plate broken pieces of the same dish, glistening as it embedded itself into her purple rug. Her hands balled into fists tight enough to clobber him unconscious.
He almost said 'please do.'
No one had to tell him twice that he was awful at being subtle.
Her next reaction isn't to yell, though. She also doesn't cry. No, she had too much stubbornness to break for him or her or the child that stood in between. At least not while he could see. She closes the gap between them and grabs his cheeks in her hands, chocolate mocha eyes melting his grey ones as she trembled. With rage or sadness, it was almost impossible to determine. But she was an emotional time bomb ready to go off any second.
"Is she pretty?" She bites the inside of her cheek, before switching up her line of questioning. "Is she dainty and sweet and smart? Is she in college?" Her hands fist again. "She is, isn't she? Of course you would pick a college girl over me."
"I didn't choose her, and she definitely didn't choose me." He grabs her by the shoulders firmly, not allowing her to kick him out just yet. "I never thought of you as less because you didn't get into a school, Rin. But we also don't work out unless we're silent and naked. You have to admit to that."
She takes in a shuddery breath, cursing her feelings back into the dark place they crawled out of. The need to beg him to love her with her profession of love on the very tip of her tongue, threatening to take the dive.
"So is this it?" She glowers up at him, closely guarding the shreds of her heart though it still somehow slipped through her fingers. "You dumping me?"
"I have no idea what I'm going to do. But I'm not ready to leave you."
That's funny. Weren't you just whining about you being too similar? About how badly she treated you?
Even so...if Rin and I aren't together, I don't know how to be. Besides, I've always been attracted to her. Just not her attitude. We have fun together. I just don't like how she can get.
Let's not forget 'Som'. The reason you ran to poor Rin in the first place.
"Butt out," he says aloud, not meaning to voice his thoughts.
"Excuse me," Rin growls. "What are you on about?"
Quitting Rin was like an alcoholic passing up a drink. It may have been bad for him, but he kept going back until the hangovers drove him to the brink of insanity.
He sighs, burying his hands in his hair. "I...should go. I'm really confused right now."
She snorts, crossing her arms tightly. "Try my problem. You have some chick on the side with your spawn on the loose, taking care of her like you...like you love her," she spits out, fury in her eyes. "And she's in your house? I bet she's who you're getting it from when you're not with me."
"Enough, Rin," Haru quips, rarely the one to raise his voice. "That's disgusting and its disrespectful to me, Someina, and you. I would never cheat. And I would never give the one I'm with anything less than my full attention."
He steps into his shoes, furiously fastening the buttons and zippers that dragged out his exit to the point it only ticked him off more.
Rin wanted him to just go already so she could lock herself in the bathroom, already exhausted of the breakdown she knew always came after one of their fights. Either that or tear her hair out.
She was tough as nails around anyone and everyone else. But with him, she was soft, sensitive, and vulnerable. Something she was scared to be right now for fear of him shoving her away. For good.
She hugs her arms around her body the moment he slams the door behind him, staring down at her feet as her vision blurs against her will.
She hated that she needed his body around hers and their souls connected. She hated that she found her needs and wants in him. But she hated one thing above all else—
The fact she loved him and would rather die than tell him. Because pain of knowing that he'd had someone before her reduced her down to nothing. It was death without the procession.
...
Haru yanks the key from the ignition of his hog, without a helmet to tear off as his frustration mounted with each heavy crunch of his boots. His girlfriend was the human obituary that was still being written for him. And day after day (or more accurately, their nights and morning afters) were where his tragedies lied with no flag to fly half-mast in memoriam of them.
Be still his blinding rage as a petite woman paced back and forth along the gravel roads, the soles of her shoes picking up pebbles like a metal detector as she fumed under her breath, pulling at her beautiful hair. Hair he sometimes dreamed about to ward off nightmares that his girlfriend's dirty mouth and hateful stare brought. And it controlled his body like a marionette bending to the will of its puppet master, stepping in front of Someina so that she skidded to a halt and gaped up at him.
She was wearing something odd and unexpected. A blue and green football jersey, paired with leggings that made for feverish flashbacks of that tight little dress she wore to dinner. And as she planted her hands on her hips and pouted her exquisitely red lips, he could pretend that they were the only souls at dinner that night. With no one else to interrupt.
"How did she take it?" Someina asks, skittish as a stray.
Haru runs a hand over the back of his neck, attempting to massage the nasty crick today's tension had set into it. Knots as big as a baseball were already bravely taking up their post.
"If I'm not bleeding and there's nothing in my hair, the ceramic must have not sprayed too far."
Her eyes comically pop out of her head. "What?!"
Haru laughs, reaching out to grab her hands in assurance. "I was joking. Though she definitely wasn't throwing a party in my honor to commemorate my newfound fatherhood."
"This is all my fault," Someina grumbles, releasing his hands to resume her stalking up and down the street. "Its my fault!"
He comes up behind her and tugs on the back of her jersey, tempted to scoop her up and spin her around until she giggled and made life brighter.
"Its technically both our faults," he says, giving her a wink so fast she's sure she imagined it. "Come here, I want to do something."
She eyes him skeptically, though she follows him anyway, allowing him to link their hands together again.
He leads them towards a massive puddle by a stop sign that stands tall on the end of the street. They had just experienced a thunderstorm before he left Rin's, and now the area still smelled of rain as the sun pierced brightening clouds.
He smirks, giving her hand a tug. "I dare you to step in it."
She gasps. "That's...that's preposterous! Aren't you supposed to be chivalrous and throw your jacket over it or something? I would look so stupid jumping around in a puddle."
No, you wouldn't. You'd look like a water nymph as you danced in it. You'd look radiant.
"Are you scared?" He teases, letting the grin spread across his features. "I thought you had courage and basked in it."
She shoots him a dubious look, before returning her attention back to the reflective pool. "You must be getting me confused with a girl that works at the nearby cafe'. She knows what she's doing when she's in her element." Someina looks up with mock thoughtfulness. "I can get her for you if you want."
He decides to take matters into his own hands and he takes big steps until he's splashing through the puddle, sending some of the water up to hit her legs without meaning to.
"Sorry about that."
She narrows her eyes, before launching herself at him. "That tears it, Hatsuharu!"
They engage into a full out battle to see who can splash the other person more, kicking up water like they would never run out until they're both left panting with the exertion.
"T-truce?" She proposes, offering her manicured hand for an armistice.
His smirk is the only thing she sees. "Truce," he says, grabbing her hand as if to shake it before they crash to the ground and find themselves submerged in the puddle.
The light in her eyes is the painkiller that he wasn't prescribed to take, though he was quickly getting hooked. And soon, rules wouldn't touch it.
He had never smiled more than he did when she laughed herself silly right beside him.
...
Somehow, Haru and Someina find themselves sitting shoulder to shoulder on his couch as they review the material for an upcoming Physics exam. She absently thumbs through the pages when Haru's hand idles on her ankle, though his eyes are in his book.
She bites the end of her pen, curiously eyeing his fingers as they deftly run up and down in a light way that doesn't seem purposeful. The gentle sensation made her want to give him more to touch, and he wasn't even trying. But otherwise, she was calm, cool, collected. Nothing could distract her from their studies.
"What'd you get for page 43?" He asks, yanking her out of her daze. "The one about motion energy."
"Oh, right! Um..." She rapidly flips through pages until she ends up skipping over page 43, and reels it back. "Motion energy is kinetic energy that's transitioned from stored energy to moving energy."
"Right," he confirms, tapping his fingers on her ankle. Making it that much harder to concentrate. "But I'm looking for something beyond textbook definitions."
There he goes sounding like a professor again.
"I don't know if you noticed, but I kind of blow at physics." She shoves the book aside, wanting to chuck it across the room. Or throw it in the microwave. Whichever destroyed it faster. "Probing someone's mind and helping them through things that actually happen is my forte. Not hypothetical situations of applying Physics to going to the grocery store."
He laughs, the sound as warm and rich as dark chocolate. "It's actually used a lot more than you think with applications that make sense. But you don't have to like it to learn it." He crosses one leg over his knee, his other arm casually slung over the couch. "Do you need help?"
Boy does she ever.
"No, thank you. I'm just confused by every last thing having to do with this class." She reluctantly gets to her feet, at a loss when his hand travels back to his side. "I'm gonna grab some coffee and make toast to clear my head. Do you want some?"
"Too much. But I guess a snack will do."
She pauses in grabbing two blonde blend coffees from his fridge, wondering if his statement carried nearly as many innuendos as she was hearing. When she returns to her seat and hands him his plate and coffee, she becomes aware of how stuffy it is with the heater kicking in. Fine and good for her uncovered legs, not so much for her long-sleeved v-neck sweater.
She removes her hair tie and shakes out her hair to cool down, fingering through its strands to attempt some damage control of her tangles. But without a comb or brush...its moot point. Instead, she sweeps it over her shoulder, lifting her textbook back into her lap.
"Alright, commercial break over. What section are we on?"
Someina glances up at him and her lungs reject an intake of air, forcing it out in a gasp as she traces the path of his stare. Pointed at the length of her neck like a dart aiming at a bulls-eye.
"Haru?"
His lips part slightly, and she's transfixed by the roll of his throat when he swallows. And her mind drifts off to teeth and biting and flawless skin that practically begged for it. Then she comes back to herself and commands her brain out of the gutter.
"Haru," she repeats, finally sparking life back into his dark eyes.
"What?"
"You were staring at me."
His eyebrows crease. "I was?"
"You were."
What seemed to be their favorite pastime whenever they were together.
He chews on his thumbnail, his expression somehow gorgeous in its contemplation. He slowly withdraws it, his book laying cockeyed across his lap in the wake of whatever this is.
"Your neck is—never mind." He reclaims his book before it crashes to the floor, resuming his place. "We're supposed to be able to explain how a basic roller-coaster works, then build one for extra-credit."
She wants to press him. The desire to is there, burning right in her core. But she wasn't ready to venture into the deadly territory of what's beginning to build between them. Its best to stay where its safe...between the pages of their Physics class.
"The one where we drop a marble and write up a report of improvements and failures?"
He nods, masking his face in indifference. "Yeah. That."
"Oh..." She waits, trying to see if he'll take initiative and delegate their roles. It doesn't happen. "Since you're excellent in this class, could you build the model and let me document?"
"Sure." He rubs his forehead, looking more run down than he did at the start. "I'll get started on the schematics of its design if you work on the template of our report."
She breathes a sigh of relief. Yes, strictly working was much better. It was the only way to rectify anything. "That's perfect."
...
Long after Haru went to bed from their three hour study session, Someina pored over her Physics textbooks for another two. Empty bottles of once cold coffee cluttered the space around her as she sat with her textbook in her lap and balanced her open notebook on her knee. Her eyes were going back and forth between blurry and clear as she reviewed Alpha Particles and their effect on Radioactive Decay. While alternating and jotting down their findings with the first test run of their roller coaster.
She squeezes her eyes shut and lets them fly open, blinking a few times in a feeble attempt to get this complex information to stay in her brain where it belongs. But nothing was working out very well.
With an annoyed and weary sigh, she slides the text off her and onto the creamy sofa cushions. Getting to her feet unsteadily, and stumbling towards the bathroom while careful not to wake Kaiko.
The moment she's sealed up in the room, she falls forward and barely grabs the sink's edge as a hammer of dizziness comes down on her hard, erupting in an explosive headache. She sputters with a cough as her vision fades in and out again, grabbing her bathroom cup and shoving it under the faucet.
Maybe she hadn't eaten enough with the caffeine. And it probably didn't help that it was well into 5 am and she hadn't had a wink of sleep since 7 am yesterday.
She gulps the refreshingly cold water and sets the cup back down, forcing herself to swallow when her body wants her doing the exact opposite. She discovers this when her stomach gives a lurch like its been kicked with one of Haru's boots. Then turned inside out, spun like pizza dough, and shoved back in.
Someina slaps a hand over her mouth as her stomach gurgles and growls unpleasantly, all color draining from her face as she craves someplace she can lay down.
But before she can, she drops to her knees in front of the toilet when they give out. Hyperventilating as the fear of fainting plagues her heavily. Her hands falling to the clean white tiles as she breathes in and out in full on panic.
That panic is short lived.
Someina starts throwing up and can't stop, quivering like a surfer in Antarctica as she broke into a cold sweat from all the stress and upset. She feels weaker and weaker, paler and paler. A mess of helpless tears and mortification as her dry heaves quieted, even while her stomach still screamed for relief.
"Som? Are you sick? I hear someone-" Haru's formerly sleepy eyes widen in alarm before he rushes over to where she hangs limply over the toilet seat. His strong grip easily capturing her skinny arms to pull her to her feet. Wrapping his own arm around her waist when he sees she can't stand by herself.
"Here, let's get you cleaned up," he says, his voice a calming balm for her frantic, frazzled mind. "Did you throw up in the sheets at all? Or did you make it to the toilet completely?"
"Made it. No sheets," she croaks, feeling pathetic while he helps her wash her hands and offers her a spare manual toothbrush. And the entire time she brushes, he holds her in place with his hands cupping her waist like an expert in handling her body. Keeping her perfectly stable and still.
After she spits in the sink, he plucks the toothbrush from her hand and discards it in the trash. Flicking on the faucet until cold water came out once more.
"I'm gonna give you a cold compress to lay over your forehead." He leads her until they stand in his room, lowering her onto the Queen-sized mattress and rushing back out. He comes away with a damp purple wash cloth that he gingerly applies to her forehead. The coolness making her relax deep into this bed and its satin black sheets.
He pulls the covers up over her and seats himself on the ledge beside her, his eyes tender and somehow upset at the same time. He extends his hand to brush a ringed thumb over her cheek, gently stroking.
"You didn't stay up after I left to study some more, did you?" He challenges, his tone practically begging that she had more sense than that. "Especially after you've been running around all week and working."
She hesitates, slowly nodding as she didn't have a clue as to how he'd react. Which is exactly why him moving around the bed to slip in on the other side was the furthest guess from her sleep-deprived mind. He leaned up on his elbow from where it rested on the pillow, his muscled chest pressed against her bare shoulder as he looked down at her.
"You're gonna get me in trouble, aren't you...?"
Say what?
He circles his arms around her before resting his chin on her shoulder. The most intimate he's ever dared to get with her in five years. And between her exhaustion, terror, and attraction...she wasn't exactly fending him off. Instead, she turns just so her compress stays on while she inches towards him. Her hands clutching his shoulder blades as she fought muscle memory of throwing her leg over his hip to bring them closer.
Things were already blurry enough with all these long hours.
His lips delicately rest against her neck, but its not deliberate. He inhales the lingering scent of soap and body spray on her skin, stirring up potent memories as his eyes fall closed.
"Y'know..." he trails off, his voice gruff and slightly husky "...You feel pretty cold. Has anyone ever told you that?"
"No," she says softly, not quite sure where he was going with this. "I don't share a bed with anyone that would tell me."
He eases up his hold a bit. "Your boyfriend's not the honest type? He'd rather suffer popsicle legs and icicle hands?"
She rolls her eyes, poking him in the cheek when she gets a hand free. "He's not my type at all," she lets out, inhaling sharply when she realizes what she said. "Um...I mean, we don't sleep together."
That wasn't much better.
Someina cringes, knowing her mouth was a runaway train. Its been, what? A few years since she was groomed to watch her mouth and develop a filter. But in under a month, Haru was reducing her to a tragically blunt and volatile woman. One that questioned everything she knew.
Questions he didn't mind answering without words.
He gets bolder, lifting his chin to face her and she's granted a nice angle of his beautiful jawline. "He's robbing himself." His fingers tingle down her arm to the inside of her wrist. "I know firsthand."
She peers at him through surprised blues, a blush setting off the rest of her body to follow suit.
"I'm that decent?" She jokes, desperate for order in the chaos.
He nods, smiling mischievously. "I remember the way you looked...moved...breathed with me." He leans over her further, on his forearms to barely keep from being flush against her. "I stupidly tried to repeat it, but it never felt the same." He takes her hand in his to place over his wildly bucking heart, as if expecting her to tame it.
"Never feeling you would be the biggest and dumbest mistake of his life." He draws her hand up to his lips, kissing it like a prince would a princess. "Because there's nothing that can top it."
She shivered for what felt like a lifetime of chills, secretly glad he hadn't let go of her hand.
"Aren't you a little biased with me being your first?" She teases, growing increasingly afraid of the aching of her lips and other pieces that once dared connect with his. "You might not know any better."
He shakes his head, stoic as he can ever be.
"Trust me, Som. I know." With finality to his words, he rolls back over so that he's just loosely holding her to himself.
The comfort she takes in his body heat and the way his necklace dangles in soothing motions has her on his hook. Its an inexplicable feeling that makes her want to pull him close enough that she can add his heartbeat to her playlist. To stain her body once more with his, and to memorialize it.
Instead, she forces herself to relax the best she can...but then, he shifts, and his breaths fan up and down her skin until they make her feel delirious.
"Wanna know a secret about me?" She breathes, desperate to distract from her rogue thoughts.
"What kind of secret?" He throws his arm over her torso without a care in the world. "Something we didn't cover in our game?"
She nods quickly, causing the washcloth to flop onto his sheets. "Yes."
"So tell me," he challenges, his eyes as dark as his tone.
"That night we had," she whispers, suddenly afraid to say it out loud, "Even though it makes me sound like a head case...ever since then, it feels like there's flames licking my bones. Like its something in me that wants to inspire mayhem and chaos and excitement.
"Its why I raced that guy. And its why I cried when you told me about your scar."
She lifts her hand, but drops it before she can touch his scar. Though she was tempted to know what it felt like so badly, her curiosity practically swallowed her in it. Curious about risks and high stakes, burning rubber and gasoline. There was the urge to touch the tattoo of his risks and imagine the experience was hers. Because she'd never earned her own scar.
It made her feel like she didn't have a history to tell people about, to reflect on. It was crushing to think she hadn't really lived.
"I was mourning the fact I never got to ride a motorcycle or to be myself, whoever that is." She shakes her head, clearing her eyes of their burning blur. "I'm starting to think I want to be a little bit reckless."
That maybe motorcycles and leather jackets were more her than sweaters and sedans.
His eyes move back and forth between hers, and she's suddenly hyper-aware that they're almost body to body with the lull of intimate conversation pulling them together.
With a heavy sigh, he sinks back into his side and folds his arms behind his head. She looks over his profile and sees nothing but struggle and confusion. And for some reason, it doesn't sit right with her at all.
A face as beautiful as his should forever be accessorized with a smile.
"That side of you..." he turns his head, ink black eyes painting her as they linger. "Don't starve it. Unleash it, or you'll feel trapped until you do."
She wets her lips with her tongue, unsure of why his words sounded as if they'd bounced around his head a long time.
"Have you been there?"
He snorts, returning to resting on his hip so that they were face to face. "Been there? I live there, Som. And there's a part of me that's never satisfied until I get into a fight or risk my life. Its a deadly part that I tried to kill once, for it to come back with a vengeance until I fed it with a rush that no one else understands. Except maybe you."
"Your girlfriend not an adrenaline junkie?" She retorts, a bitter edge to her voice she doesn't recognize.
He clasps his hands together over his toned stomach, returning to staring up at the ceiling to avoid her gaze. "Just because she's with me doesn't mean she likes thrills. She's either masochistic or lonely, and I'm the next best thing." He closes his eyes with a pinched intake of air, like he's talking without being able to stop. "Ask me why I chose her and I would tell you the truth."
"Which is?"
"That I'm replacing someone that I can never have. And I'm her placeholder until she finds whatever she's looking for."
Someina's heart plummets so far down that there's no sound when it finally stops. And words stick to her tongue even though she wants to tell him the real reason she was with Hatori. And what she would give if she could change everything. But she doesn't and this night is messy as is. So she rolls over to create more distance, shoving one hand under the borrowed pillow as she forces herself to lie still. And she listens until his breaths slow and even as his eyes fall closed.
"Night."
"...goodnight, Haru."
I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Chapter 6 and the ones following will include Kaiko a lot more, the stage is being set for all of it. Trust ;) This one was a lot more about HaruxSomeina with a couple of reveals about both of them. And oddly enough...this story's nearly perfect song choice would be "Eyes Closed" by Halsey. Which wasn't intentional. But, I'm not mad at it.
My Answer To Last Chapter's Question: Plenty of odd food combinations have been tried by yours truly. Hawaiian rolls and ketchup, milkshakes and fries (though this is pretty popular now), watermelon sprinkled with salt. A ton.
Chapter Question: What is your favorite hobby/sport?
The Bloody Red Queen Of Angst: What would you expect from a man with two sides? It gets crazy up in that cranium lolol By the way, addressing his pills/bipolar disorder almost happened in the puzzle thingy. Just saying. Does it count that I write most of it in first person before converting it later? I mean...I'm not sure if it does...but I'll take it! :3 Your guess was as good as mine. Mwahahahaha! That and their relationship brings out the worst in themselves (Haru and Rin's as well, in a different way).
Either that or Ear Candy. Take yo pick ;) You know I need to have at least one shirtless scene with Haru per story lol That's the quota. Aww thank you! Would you believe me if I said Aden is his favorite lead singer? Because it is. Seriously. Kinda befitting if this universe and Mirror, Mirror were linked considering he and Kurumi share music tastes. She definitely feels like the most complex character I'm tackling to date. Many facets and secrets to her. And you're right on the money with that. Bad for their health, but they have reasons or non-reasons to not stay away. Hey now. If you can't trust a stranger you hooked up with half a decade ago, who can you trust? xDD That is the perfect way to describe his reaction. Trueee. For once, no analogy or sexy euphemism. As for ze panda, it tis my signature animal. You know I must include it. Yup! You're not supposed to distinguish him as someone rich to someone low profile. How do you think they're gonna feel when they cross paths (Hatori and Haru) both don't know they're the other person that knows Someina. Thank you! Kaiko holds more depth to her, hopefully to be explored next chapter. But Yuki already has a name. Mickey Mouse. I thought it was a cool philosophy to have. One that I don't even think I've pondered or heard before. Yeahhh. Rin would only ever have children if it were Haru's. Probably not gonna happen otherwise. Their friendship is one of my favs from the fandom, and not touched on all that much (at least as not as much as what could have been). Which I find very sad. Would he be any other way? Hahaha Honestly, this scene was fun to write. But it was absolutely made for you. Any other requests? :) You should be able to see Kaiko and Haru in action in the garage during another chapter. Its like their hangout and his workplace at the same time.
Oh. My. Gosh. You mentioned Akito in my presence?! But seriously, have you noticed that this and No Strings have no Akito?! What the heck? You know how it works with children like him (Takashi). Positive reinforcement helps. Sometimes...or sometimes, it backfires and makes them repeat it. Which is exactly why she was acting different in the store, around Hatori, and at the fair. Again. Complex. lol
Probably because I've experienced it one too many times. That scene and that quote were one of my favorite moments of the chapter. I wanted to show how she has two sides of her own that war with one another; one that belongs to her past, family, and who she struggles to be; and the other that she's learning about in her present with her daughter, Haru, and her friends.
I love how you keep that short and sweet because you know what's coming next xD
Likely story~ Really. You really thought Kris came to mind when penning this segment? Well...you would be correct. Dangit Queenie!
You know it! And that's seriously my favorite line of this entire story. Not even kidding.
T_T Thank youuu! And, I do suppose you have your answer to that question about his scar. My goodness, woman. How ever will you handle more if that's heated to you? *Confers with myself* Should we turn down the steam...? Or nah? Nah. Crank it up!
Aw. For real? I just don't like my food touching...X.X But I can sympathize with that. Man. Which is why I crammed it into the end of this chapter, adding almost 1k more words haha Thanks! :D I want you thank you forever~ So just get used to it! I shall not take no for an answer.
BunkoWrites: Oh wow! Thank you, so much! :D
See you all next chapter! ^_^