Well, where do I start on this one?
It's not the worst I've ever read. Bear with me, starting positive and trying to stay that way, because it's all downhill from there.
Without even touching on the plot, your grammar and punctuation is kind of atrocious. I saw a low of capital letters where there shouldn't be any (and then words that weren't capitalised when they should be), your direct speech certainly needs a lot of improvement and the overall "flow" of the sentences just didn't quite fit.
Yeah, saying "flow" is very vague, but I'm far too impatient to try and explain exactly what I mean.
Onto the content itself - this is where I'm probably going to rant and come dangerously close to flame territory - and really? "Flames will be used to burn flamers alive"? It's like the kid who goes to school and tells bullies that "bullying isn't cool" when he gets picked on. Honestly, the amount of BS...
Ahem. Yes. Time to insult the story instead of the author.
Cliché. That's all it is so far, and it's not even cliché done well. Annabeth betrays Olympus because she loves Luke? Hardly patented stuff, and difficult to find a different explanation for, so I can let that one slide... but then Annabeth kills Percy's mum as a kind of "last laugh" retaliation. For one thing, how the BALLS did she do it between realising her plan had gone to shit (when Percy kills Luke) and being hit by a bolt of lightning?
And don't give me any BS about her doing it beforehand. I thought that one through and that doesn't make sense either, but typing it out takes too long.
Or afterwards too. Surviving a bolt of lightning with no prior indication of immunity to high voltage is BS as well. She literally couldn't have killed Sally unless you deus ex machina the living shit out of it.
Next thing about the plot that is utterly horrendous: every bit if dialogue. Overly dramatic; unnecessarily so, I dare say. Also the blessings are pretty stupid as well. He literally just said, "Be good to your kids and leave me alone," but then the Olympians are like "Sure, I'll respect your request once I give you all this stupid crap."
No. Just no.
Then there's the bit with the Outsider. He's given an ability and he just suddenly knows how to use it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not even a DISHONORED player and I'm enjoying that you're bringing it to a reasonably unexplored crossover (if not how it's getting there). But if he gets a new power and suddenly he just KNOWS how to use it... that's lazy, and really boring.
I'm not even going to start on how stupid a name Azron is. It s like someone was saying Aaron and coughed halfway through.
Anyway, good luck. You're gonna need it.
Right, i already sent a lengthy response via PM, but i just have to say this, Fuck you very much. i like my readers, i really do, you guys are badass and you help me out, love ya for that, but this guy, this guy just wants to fuck with me, fuck with my story, and fuck with my confidence, so, Fuck you, you dont like this story? fine, then fuck off! you want a generic PJO story, that follows the entire plot of the books with only a few minor changes to the plot, Then go put on your big boy Panties and go fucking look for it! there are billions! this is not one of those stories! so, fuck you.