Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get insecure
It doesn't matter anymore

We all jumped to our feet abruptly and stood, wondering who was going to get the door. In the end, Lindsay, who had somehow extricated her extremely long legs from under the table faster than either Courtney or I, opened the door. Time seemed to freeze. Luckily, Lindsay was ready to break the silence, albeit in a very tactless way.

"Hey look Cathy; it's your ex-boyfriend! Isn't he the one that broke up with you for that Greta girl?" Courtney's expression hardened, but obviously the blonde had missed this because she blithely continued. "Come upon, you've GOT to remember! You spent like, forever crying, and then you ate that entire carton of ice-cream, which was like, totally bad for your pores you know."

Lindsay opened the door wider and I got a good look at the abusive a-hole who had broken my best-friend's heart. He didn't appear to have suffered any ill effects. I had always hated Duncan, ever since he beat me up and stole my squeaky dinosaur. Not much about him changed since then, except that he progressed from stealing dinosaurs to stealing cars.

"So Princess, looked like you missed me," Duncan said nonchalantly. Courtney instantly turned red, and flew at him. "Get out! Get OUT!" she yelled, while trying to shove him out the door. He protested, using the most ridiculous cliché I had ever heard. "But Courtney baby, I love you." She was almost crying now. "Yeah right, just like how you loved me when you were cheating on me with Gwen!"

You tell him Courtney, I thought to myself. You show that selfish, no good, lazy boy that could never love you like I could. Oops. I immediately tried to purge the errant thought from my brain.

Duncan moved closer to Courtney, and looked her in the eye. "Princess, Gwen and I are history. We broke up today. I told her I'd never love her as much as I love you."

Don't believe him, don't believe him, he's lying, rang the chorus in my head. I held my breath.

"Really?" Courtney asked, smiling through her tears. "Yep," the bad boy said, as though this didn't really matter at all. "Then welcome back," she said, smiling her amazing smile. The smile that always made me feel like I'd just won a million bucks.

I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach. How could she do this to me? I stood stock still in my position near the door, hoping somehow fate would reverse itself, and that I could just be laughing over waffles with Courtney and Lindsay. Speaking of Lindsay….

"Hey Donald! So you and Christi are getting back together?" Duncan shrugged his shoulders. "Were we ever apart?" Lindsay laughed, her head tilting backwards. "That's not what Todd here thought," she giggled.

Oh no. Duncan turned his aquamarine eyes that Courtney had always loved searching, and appraised me coldly.

"What's he doing here?" he growled. He started across the floor toward me, but Courtney blocked him. "He's just here for a visit." Duncan remained skeptical. "If that's all, then WHAT the hell was your dumb blonde of a roommate talking about?" Courtney cheeks got redder. "He came because I asked him to." She threw her arms open in emphasis. "He came here because you broke my heart!"

He paused for a moment, considering this. Then he smirked. He hasn't changed, I thought. The smirk was the same as it had been for years. The smirk that he gave me was the one he gave me when we were 3 and he stole my dinosaur, and when we were 5 and he threw a water balloon in my face. Not to mention the smirk that spread itself over his face when he beat me up after prom and left me lying on the pavement, bleeding.

"Alright, get him out of here," he said. I must have looked shocked, because he turned and spoke directly to me. "Get out man; I need some time with my girlfriend." "But…, I began, hoping to defend myself."

Come on! I told myself. You didn't drive up from North Carolina for THIS! I was all ready to argue when Courtney stepped forward.

"I need to talk to him. Alone." She was using her "lawyer voice", you couldn't argue with it. If you wanted to live.

We stepped on her porch, and I listened to the rain pour down from the heavens.

"Trent…" she began warningly. "Yes?" I answered. "I've been thinking, and…" she began, but I cut her off. "You haven't been thinking at all!" "How can you just let him back in your life like that?" I thumped my foot for emphasis. "One minute you were crying in your car, and the next you're inviting him in for dinner?" "Stop being an idiot!"

That probably wasn't such a good idea. Courtney looked scandalized. I wasn't ready to back down though. It felt so good to finally tell her all these things.

"I can make my own decisions," she hissed, obviously trying to hold in her temper." "Yeah, right!" I responded. "You TOTALLY went to Dartmouth of your own free will. What your dad told you had NOTHING to do with it."

I decided to throw in my last argument.

"You MESS up your life, and then you call me to come and help you fix it. Every single time!"

She grabbed me by my collar, and yelled into my face. "Really Trent?" "Cause I think that if you DIDN'T have me, then you wouldn't know what to do with yourself." She pushed backwards, and I hit my leg on the railing of her white porch. "You're horribly insecure!" she shrieked.

She looked devastated, even worse then when she had been crying before. I felt guilt wash over me. How could I have treated her this way? Was I any better than Duncan now? I changed my tone, attempting to make peace.

"Please Courtney, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I just want you to be loved and cherished by whoever you date. I want you to feel beautiful."

I was too late, and I could tell. Courtney's eyes flashed daggers at me.

"Trent, I don't care if you WERE my best friend since forever. You CANNOT say something like that and just apologize." She turned inside, grabbed my suitcase from where I had left it on her floor, and tossed it at me. For a minute, I thought she looked conflicted, and I stretched out my hand, pleading with her silently. Shaking, she closed the door on me, with these final terrible words.

"It doesn't matter anymore."

Author's Note: Hi guys. Hope this chappie satisfies, I've been meaning to write it for a while, but I burned out after writing multiple essays on the Treaty of Versailles. The writing may have some flaws, I'll probably edit them out later. Anyways, I've been having trouble focusing enough to write these, so I was thinking...what motivates me? And the answer, of course, is your reviews. So here it is: DO YOU WANT TO INFLUENCE THIS STORY? Leave your idea in a review, and I'll pick the best one and incorporate it into Chapter 5. Please Read and Review

Love,

.review17