"The whole of life is just like watching a film. Only it's as though you always get in ten minutes after the big picture has started, and no-one will tell you the plot, so you have to work it out all yourself from the clues."

― Terry Pratchett, Moving Pictures

Have you ever felt, like your life is just one long bad written movie and when you close your eyes you can almost hear the poorly composed soundtrack.

You can see pictures, glimpses of yourself caught on tape.

You don't remember it, you're watching it.

As if it happened to someone else… You're just a viewer, like in one of those cheap horror movies. When you see a girl walking in to an abandoned mansion, screaming at the top of your lungs for her to back away, return where she came from.

Just don't make that stupid mistake, don't interfere, just run.

Thats how my lifes been, when i'm looking back I don't see my self, i see a young boy, searching for something, someone. I'm watching him, screaming for him to turn around, run far far away.

"it won't help, you will get hurt, its not worth it, you can't save her!" I scream and scream and still, he won't turn away.

The movie have already been made, soon the credits will start, black on white.

I wonder what the title to my life would be… "the morons adventure.", no thats not it… "The idiotic fleas mistakes.", yes thats it, i bet they could fill a lifetime.

So thats why, when I found my self beaten, pushed up against the wall, my life slipping away...

Him...watching me.

I couldn't help to wonder, in what part of the movie was i supposed to know?

Images flashing before my eyes.

I guess… If i was going to start from the beginning, from the origin of Ozaya Orihara's life, it would be on that roof, the first time I met Amaya, but you already knew about that part. I already knew that part, instead let us just go back a few hours, its all I need. A few hours, my last time on this earth.

As I said the credits will start soon: The idiotic fleas mistakes", starring Izaya Orihara. The story of how I died, dramatic i know.

"Izaya?!"

That voice, no, no,no! It couldn't be! Namie.

The angry voice followed by a door closing, making the paintings on my walls tremble.

I forced myself to sit up, the bruises and cuts had healed, except from the ones around my throat, I had been beaten up enough times to know how to treat a wound.

Luckily my ribs wasn't broken as I first had guessed, I had come to the conclusion when I woke up the next day without being dead, but that didn't make the pain go away.

My breathing was heavy and without any painkillers i was on the verge of passing out, white spots danced before my eyes.

"Izaya! Are you still sleeping? Oh my god! Look at all this work, i expect an extra payment! Because this will take hours-." Her voice grew closer and I easily slipped in to my normal character, the wry smile came naturally."-Hey! Are you even listening to me?!-" My bedroom door flung open, revealing an angry Namie. Her green eyes watching me carefully."-Oh my god, you look awful! Is that.. Bruises?"

"And a good morning to you as well Nami-chan!~ Oh this?" I said touching my throat gently." What can I say? I like it rough!"

She looked at me with disbelief and something close to disgust."Whatever, its not like I care… I have work to do."

She closed the door behind her while I falled back against my pillows with sigh, this was going to be a long day… But I could do it, I always pulled thru, in the end.

I tried sitting up again, forcing my legs over the side of the bed, I cursed under my breath.

Okay… Maybe my ribs was broken after all… My eyes teared unwillingly while I forced myself up. A black simple T-shirt laid on the ground, it would do.

Getting dressed was more painful than i would like to admit, every movement was like torture, could this be classified as self harm? Well, maybe not but it was close…

I opened the door, Namie was already working, leaning over her desk, ignoring me best she could when i placed myself in my computer chair. Oh my lovely computer, it looked even more friendly than Namie, technology I had missed you solemnly.

This was work for me, searching the web for gossip, because for an informant like me gossip was gold.

This is the two things you need to know about gossip, either its born from something real or its created as an evil attempt on dirtying someones reputation. No matter the reason or its origin, it always holds something worth having.

"What the hell are you doing?" Namie said at last, I had been ravaging my keyboard, I could type faster than I could talk and that said a lot.

[Sakurai Amaya, Kyoto] I don't know how many times I had typed that name, hoping that one day I would find a picture of her, where she once lived, maybe her house or a family photo.

I knew that her mother's surname had been Sakurai and that she had grown up in Kyoto. It was a longshot but it was all I had, and as usual I couldn't find anything.

"Orihara?" Namie said again, trying to get my attention."Oh, sorry my love, I was writing a fanfiction about me and lovely Shizu-chan." I joked dead serious.

"Ha-Ha-ha…" She laughed dryly." You would make a terrible writer, and its not like you have your own manga or anything...Besides, you and shizuo Heiwajima isn't exactly best friends, who would ever think-"

"I didn't know that you read manga?" I said while Namie returned to her work with a snort.

"I don't, just pointing out how stupid and hilarious even the idea… Its repulsing…"

I couldn't help to laugh, if yet painfully."Oh… Namie-chan, what would I do without you?"

"Work." She said while she looked at me for a brief moment."Are you sure you're okay?"

"Why wouldn't i be?" I said, tilting my head.

"Because, normally you would have given me a headache or… I don't know, given out a speech about humanity…"

"Well well well, what's this?! Does Nami-chan worry about me? Do you miss my villain act?"

"Don't flatter yourself… You're not a villain Orihara, your a-"

"Monster? Please spare me your comments, you're breaking a poor mans heart! Don't you know how my heart skips a beat when I look into your beautiful jaden eyes?"

"I was going to say misguided fool, but sure be my guest… Oh and you have a meeting this afternoon."

"Cansel it."

"what?!" She stared at me, her green eyes shocked, normally I would have laughed but I was to tired, to many sleepless nights."Oh, did I scare you?~ Nami-chan… I'm so sorry…" I used my girly, mocking voice, one I knew usualy pissed her of but she didn't seem upset at all, was i losing my touch? No it was something else… was she… Worried about me? I laughed the thought away." Izaya… Are you sure everythings fine?"

"Oh, well of course Nami-chan! Just had a looong, rough night if you know what i mean~"

She frowned angrily, well at least that still worked."Its with one of the Awakusu, a snitch this is-"

"irreplaceable you're right, i'll go, but not here, I don't want him to know where I live, it could be a trap…" I said thoughtfully, she was right, this was important, the Awakusu was one of the gangs I didn't have much info on, and I was desperate… I started dozing of.

I needed to meet this man, nothing more to it. Even tho it was a great possibility that it was a trap, i needed somewhere safe, still private… Maybe somewhere in Ikebukuro, I also needed his name. Knowing a person makes it that much easier to break him

"Sometimes I wonder…"

"hm…?" It wasn't like her to talk, she got to work, insulted me with all rights, took her paycheck and left, it was a rearrangement i was suited with.

"How something- someone like you… What's going on inside your mind? Every step, every word, you must think it over a million times before answering, and that 999th time, its when you realise what words will hurt the most."

She said it so casual, still I could see that this was something she had been thinking about.

"The most powerful thing are words, sure you can kill a man with your bare hands but it will still be called a murder. With words, you can do more, you can leave him vulnerable and shaking, you can make a man kill himself, no crimes committed its-"

"Why? Why do you enjoy hurting people?"

That's where you're wrong..."I don't see the harm in it, humans are such strange creatures…" I spinned in my chair, ignoring the burning pain." "Everyone lies, everyone hides things, everyone has walls and masks that hides their true face from the world."

"Even you?"

"especially me."

If she only knew.

Authors note: Sorry for the small chapter, If I didnt end it here it would be way to long! With other words I will post the next one tomorrow (hopefully) I also miss some Izaya and shizuo action a looot, so next chapter will be *smirk* fun!