Chapter Four: The Third Month

"Hiiiiiirrrrroooooooo!" Shuichi whined, on a step ladder and attempting to reach the top shelf in the kitchen of his new-but-not-so-new apartment. He was standing on a small step-ladder and stretching to his fullest. The guitarist stepped into the room and nearly had a heart attack when he saw what the singer was up to.

"Shuichi! Get down! What if you hurt yourself?" He grabbed the singer and put him safely on the ground. "What was it that you wanted?" he asked in a softer tone of voice, stepping onto the step-ladder as he noticed the tears in his friends eyes. He knew that the singer knew he was trying to look after him and the baby, and that he'd be easily forgiven, but he couldn't help the twinge of guilt he felt.

"Sorry, Hiro. Uhm. I was trying to get the golden syrup. I want it to go with the cheese sandwich." Mentally, the guitarist shuddered at his friends choice of food – albeit, craving induced.

"It's alright, Shuichi, I shouldn't have shouted at you."

"No, no. You were in the right. I shouldn't have been doing something so stupid." Shuichi took the golden syrup from his friend, smiling gently, although it wasn't nearly as bright as it used to be. "It's not just me anymore, is it? I gotta think about my baby." At this, Shuichi ran a tentative hand over his slightly swollen abdomen, before completing his sandwich and wandering into his living room.

Plonking himself down on the sofa he began to wolf down his sandwich. He had his feet up and was rubbing his belly subconsciously comforting himself (and undoubtedly the baby) as he watched the music channels.

Suguru was sitting on the armchair next to the sofa watching the pink-haired man. The pianist had never really had a soft-spot for the bi-polar singer, but he could feel one growing in the past month. He had begun to understand why Hiro and sometimes even the cold-hearted writer fawned over him.

"Hey, Suguru!" Hiro called from where he was still tinkering around in the kitchen "Have you shown Shuichi the music for his new song? Like to see if it fits?"

"No, he hasn't, Hiro." Shuichi called back, "But right now I just wanna relax and think of nothing."

"Heh, as if that isn't what you do all the time Shu-chan!"

"Heyyyyy!"

"Hahahaha! I'm kidding. Suguru, do you want something to eat? Seeing Shuichi eat has made me hungry."

Suguru, who had been amused listening to the banter between the two best friends, looked up from his music pad, "Yeah thanks, Hiro." Then he sat for a few seconds before unfolding his legs from underneath himself, "I'll come and give you a hand, Hiro. Shuichi, would you like me to get you something too?"

Shuichi stared up at the teal-haired man for a moment, "Yeah, could you get me a... chocolate milkshake with melon pocky and pickle slices?"

Suguru smiled brightly at him, "Of course."

Shuichi continued to eat his sandwich quietly humming to himself, his hand now resting on his belly where his baby-bump started.

"We're like a family, eh Baby?" He muttered, momentarily rubbing his stomach. "Although I think there's someone missing… But we won't tell the others that. I don't want them to worry."

Little did Shuichi know that the keyboardist and guitarist had been standing near the doorway from the kitchen to the living-room. And they had already begun to worry.

"Tohma!" Yuki barked as he stepped into the office at NG Studios, "Find Shuichi! It has been a month and you still haven't found him!"

"Eiri-san…" Tohma moaned, clutching the bridge of his nose, "We can't find him any faster than we are. We have no idea where he is." He lied. "He no longer comes into the studio and sends us his music through four or five different people. He has this well thought out – although I never thought I'd say those words whilst talking about Shindou-san."

Yuki threw himself into the chair opposite Tohma's desk and put his head in his slimmer-than-usual hands. He's lost weight; I don't think I've seen Eiri this shaken up about anything. I think this might even surpass the Kitazawa incident. Hmm, maybe Shuichi has won, not I?

"I don't know what to do, Tohma." He's opening up to me? This is doing things to Eiri I had never thought possible after Kitazawa. "When I go home… it's not home anymore. He's not there to greet me; he's not there in my bed. It sickens me to think that he might be with someone else. He's not around to prevent me from over-working anymore and – Tohma… I-I need him!" The NG president noticed the blush touching the writer's ears and the slight tremble of the shoulders.

"Eiri." Tohma walked around his desk to put his hand on the writer's shoulder, trying to offer as much comfort as he was able. "I have a feeling that if Shindou-san doesn't wish to be found, you wont find him. I'm sorry, Eiri-san."

The writer looked up at Tohma and shook his head. "For once, Tohma, it's not your fault. It's me. It always has been me. My insecurities have led Shuichi to leave me. I just… I don't understand why he would leave me when he so obviously needed me. You didn't see how ill he was Tohma…" Eiri stared off into space for a few seconds, trying to get his bearings before he stood, gently pushing Tohma's consoling hand away from himself.

"Eiri-san, you know where I am if you need me. Mika too. She would love to feel like your sister again, more than anything in the world." Tohma said, letting the writer out.

"Thank you, Tohma. That means a lot." Eiri managed a small smile, but it was a shadow of what Tohma had begun to see when the writer and Shuichi were together, particularly in the last few months.

After Yuki had left, Tohma was left to his own thoughts. It was true that Shuichi needed his lover at this juncture, but he agreed with Shuichi's decision to leave the writer. Eiri, from both of their points of view, just wasn't ready for that kind of relationship. There was no way that Eiri would have been able to cope with Shuichi and a child, although he had to admit Shuichi's immaturity had been subdued since he had become pregnant. Besides, Shuichi's band mates had been more than helpful and had taken care of the singer for the past month with no complaints, but whenever the guitarist would phone in to give Tohma an update on the singer's health, Hiro would inform him that the singer had a habit of crying himself to sleep and suffer from nightmares so strong that they could be classed as night terrors.

It was a difficult situation to be involved in and Tohma thought that it had gone on long enough. Although it had been only one month he knew that Yuki had to be in tatters to have been able to open up to him.

He reached toward his phone and began to dial. On the fourth ring, Shuichi picked up.

"Moshi-moshi, Shuichi here."

Tohma noticed how dulled Shuichi's normal happy demeanor seemed, even through the phone. "Shindou-san, it's Seguchi. I need to meet with you. Is it possible for you to come and meet me today, in about twenty minutes?"

There was a small pause. "I can, but I can't stay out long, Seguchi-san, I have my ultra-sound appointment today."

"Of course. I'll see that you are escorted there, but it is necessary that I see you as soon as possible." Tohma insisted.

"Okay. Where do you want to meet?"

Tohma debated this for a second. He had to be somewhere away from where Yuki could be. He didn't want to risk putting the two back together prematurely. There were things he had to straighten out first. "How about I come over to your flat? I'll bring you whatever you are craving."

Again there was a small pause and the NG president knew that the younger man was questioning whether or not to trust him. He knew he was reaping what he had sown; after all, Tohma had never treated Shuichi with anything more than contempt. "You can come here." And with that the phone clicked off.

Tohma sighed, replacing the handset. This is not going to be easy, he thought.