So soon! Yep, here's another chapter finally concluding the first day! From here on the chapters are going to come out at a snail's pace since they're still in their planning stages, so if any of you like this be patient, okay? Thanks!

Warning: There are a couple of f-bombs in this chapter if anyone's offended by that. And beware of Joey's mouth, but we all knew that unless you're just joining us!

Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Quest VIII or any other series mentioned or hinted at. They all belong to their respective owners and I am not one of them.

Day One (Part Four): Alice On Acid

Well Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumbass (everyone should know who that is!) had found their way to Valentina's house after Joey decided to take a detour because he kept crying and bitching about getting no smores and he just had to make a few more sack jokes to be content. At least they arrived, but only to find the sweet angel Valentina passed out with her head on a pink table near an enormous glass ball situated on some sort of stand.

"Alright! An unconscious chick!" Joey beamed and cheered.

Yangus immediately hissed, "Wot the hell is wrong wit you, guv!"

"What? I was only going to draw on her face like Jigglypuff does!" Joey retorted.

"Jiggly-who? Ugh, it doesn't matter, as long as you aren't thinkin' wot I thought you were thinkin'," Yangus sighed. Damn it did he just want to go to sleep, Valentina was lucky she didn't have to hear Joey's every thought that popped out of his mouth.

Joey then sneakily added on, "And the great thing about unconscious chicks is they can't say no."

"Guv!"

"What! You were thinking it too! And for the last time it's Governator!"

"Not only is that tasteless, but you took sumone else's joke, ya bastard!"

"Is it, Yangus? Is it?"

"Ah! You came!" a pretty familiar voice called. Valentina had woken up while Yangus and Joey were bickering, yet she was unaware of what the two were fussing over. She then on a small cute frown as she hurried out of her chair. "I'm so sorry! I – I must have drifted off. How rude of me! I wanted to ask you a favour about this crystal ball." She then paused, thinking a tiny bit. "Sorry, I'm getting ahead of myself. Perhaps I should start from the beginning?"

Joey though for a moment before heavily sighing, "Normally I would say yes, like when I usually play and I never chose to 'no' option before, but I am getting sick and tired of copying dialog and losing sleep whether I am accurate about the event that happens, so fuck it. Fuck it all!"

Yangus then shook Joey screaming, "No damn it! YOU BROKE THE FOURTH WALL! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU MONSTER!"

"SHUT UP!" screeched a shockingly infuriated Valentina. She then quickly composed herself while both Joey and Yangus stared at the seemingly sweet girl with wide eyes. "Sorry, I didn't mean to be so rude. I'll just tell you the short version and say that this," she gave a pointed look towards the crystal ball on the table, "isn't a real crystal ball. I was hoping you would be able to help find a real one so my father, Kalderasha, gets his powers back. He wo-"

Just then the door behind Joey and Yangus swung open, revealing a drunken Kalderasha stumbling though the doorway. Shutting the door and glancing around, noticing two familiar strangers standing around and his daughter standing close to the glass ball on the table. He then barked in a drunken slur, "How many times have I told you not to touch my crystal ball?"

Joey couldn't help but blurt out in disgust to Valentina, "I didn't know you were into fake balls! And isn't that considered incest? Eeeewwww!"

The drunken hippie fortuneteller hobbled further into his house and commanded, "Valentina, show your visitors to the door and give them a good swift kick in the ass for good mesher and-" Instantly Kalderasha passed out on the floor.

"Not again," Valentina whined before turning back to her current guests. "Could you please find him a crystal ball? One big enough to bring back his powers?"

"So you want me to get a bigger crystal ball?" Joey asked, looking to Valentina for complete confirmation, which was answered with a nod. "Man, you and your weird-ass fetishes. Okay, I'll do it. The king would get mad at me if I didn't accept."

"This is just like my dream!" Valentina beamed with joy. "Also in my dream there was a big crystal ball hidden deep inside a cave covered by a waterfall south of here. There was also a freaky fish guy-"

"We took up enough of your time. 'Kaythanxbye!" Joey waved as he and Yangus rushed out the door to get this over with as soon as possible and also before Yangus could criticize Valentina for using someone else's joke.

As they passed by the inn Yangus hoped that they would go there as it was already late, but when they walked out of the gate he was tempted to throw a fit.

They met with the midget king and listened to him ramble before they finally took their leave.

"Hey guys, aren't we going to get abducted by aliens and get anal probed by them if we stay out too long at night?" Joey asked.

"Shut up Joey," King Trode and Yangus growled in annoyance.