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CHAPTER – 4
Alice was currently on the phone with Gemina, a fashion designer who could have an idea about Jake Black as they called him now. Edward was lounging in the hotel room absent mindedly flicking the channels in it. Now that he was here, he wasn't sure about meeting the teen wolf anymore. How could he even face him with a straight face, he didn't deserve Jacob after what he did to him but he wasn't able to just forget about Jacob and move on. Unlike Bella, Jacob was his true soul mate; he had been foolish not to realize that sooner.
Now he had to pay the price for his attitude and ignorance and plain stupidity. He knew the wolf would be furious if he so much as caught sight of him. He would need to work very hard and grovel under his lover's feet if he so much as wanted the wolf to acknowledge his presence. But what if he was causing more pain to Jacob by returning, he couldn't help but think if Jacob was better off without him. The way he had hurt Jacob still echoed in his mind and Jacob's face when he had told him about Bella still haunted him and made him cringe.
"Feeling guilty or uncertain is not going to help you Edward" Jasper said as he looked at Edward with a meaningful expression.
Edward threw his hands up in the air in frustration as he said "I cannot help but think he's better off without me, with someone else who deserves his love"
Jasper frowned before saying "Well, let's pack up and leave then"
"What?" Edward asked surprised and shocked at the same time.
Jasper shook his head and said "Edward, if you get into this doubting yourself you're going to be hurting yourself and Jacob in the end"
Edward sputtered and said "But….I can't help it, I feel too guilty"
Jasper suddenly asked "Would you able to look at him with any man other than yourself?"
"NO" Edward said immediately and then made to cover his mistake when Jasper looked smug. "I mean if it makes him happy then yes, I will step away"
"Somehow I don't think you will" Jasper said grinning and going to meet Alice in the balcony.
Edward looked confused and tried to think about what Jasper had told him about him not being able to give up Jacob. He'd certainly find it very hard to see Jacob with any other person but was he so selfish as to ruin Jacob's happiness for his own. He would make sure Jacob stayed happy with him; he'd try and make up for his mistakes for an eternity for abandoning Jacob.
Right that moment Alice came back in with a triumphant grin on her face, "He's going to be at the Casa Del Mar in Santa Monica tomorrow for a photo shoot, we can meet up with him when he's finished"
Edward's uncertainty was back in full force now and before he could back pedal, Jasper shot him a look influencing his emotions and giving him a confidence boost. Edward then said "I suppose we should get going then"
Alice nodded smiling and said "I booked a room with a great view of the beech"
Alice chattered about the hotel they were going to stay in to Jasper as Edward brooded in his room thinking about the inevitable meeting with the wolf tomorrow. Right now, he'd rather pick going to Volturi than to face his lover's wrath.
Jacob bustled around the room trying to find his belongings which were scattered all over the house thanks to his lovely daughter who had gone off with Emmett today as he had to go to Santa Monica for a photo shoot. He tripped over a fallen toy and almost fell face first on the floor but managed to catch himself just in time. Today was so not his day, he picked up his bag and rushed outside locking the door of his two bedrooms flat and running outside to meet Rosalie who was giving him a ride. The black Audi with tinted windows stood proudly in the parking lot and the proud owner was scowling at Jacob as he got in muttering an apology.
"Whatever wolf, you're as tardy as they come" Rosalie said with a mock frown.
"Oh shut up Rosalie, let's just go alright?" Jacob asked feeling low by the minute.
Rosalie just shrugged and started the car going in her usual break neck speed which made Jacob feel nauseous and dizzy all the time.
"Which hotel did you say it was again?" Rosalie asked as she drove ignoring the wolf's discomfort.
"Casa Del Mar and would you please stop driving like a maniac, you're going to get me killed!" Jacob said as Rosalie made a sharp turn.
"I don't know about that wolf, it was this speed that got us to you while you were screaming in your apartment in labor" Rosalie said although she knew Jacob was uncomfortable about talking about 'that' event and she saw Jacob's cheeks reddening when she turned to him and shook her head.
"Shut up Rosalie" Jacob muttered half heartedly partly because he agreed with her and partly because he felt so embarrassed he wished he could dig a hole and hide in it.
Edward paced back and forth in the balcony as he looked at the beach. Alice did book a room with a great view and Alice had very diligently asked Jacob's boss to let Jacob know that he had a visitor when the photo shoots were done. He was already annoyed by the paparazzi gathered in the hotel to maul Jacob; he didn't even want to think about crazy fan girls. He was going to loose his mind if the humans kept on repeating how desirable Jake Black was. He heard Alice come into the room and say "I think it's time for you to go"
Edward sat back in the hall room waiting for Jacob to come through any minute, he really did not know what the werewolf would do to him once he saw him but he was prepared for any physical violence and swearing. He would guide Jacob into their room which was not so far away from the hall and then he would start with the begging. He grimaced as he thought about his plight. He heard someone's footsteps and mentally thanked every deity he knew for the fact that there weren't any people around in the room except for a maid who had thankfully entered one of the rooms and a guy who was also on his way to deliver food to one of the suite's occupants. But he didn't know what he'd do if Jacob came in with another person. He might have to go out there and pull Jacob away with him if the wolf scented him and decided to leave. How could he have been so nervous to not detect the loopholes in Alice's wonderful plan.
He stiffened as he heard the footsteps became louder and scented the unmistakable earthy spicy scent of Jacob although it was marred by the scent of colognes and make up. He scowled but stood up getting ready to tackle Jacob into their room. As Jacob rounded the corner Edward took him by surprise by grabbing him and running in vampire's speed to his room not thinking about anything until he shut the door behind him.
Jacob walked slowly along the corridors wondering who the visitor was, he knew that Robbie wouldn't have left some crazy fan meet him but then who could it be. Maybe he was wanted for some fashion show or some get together or something, he didn't know and all he wanted to do was get this over with and find solace in his home. He had woken up early because of Lucy and he was not in the mood for any talks. Perhaps it was his in sleepiness and general frustration that he failed to recognize the scent early as he felt himself being pulled up and things rushed past him and he opened his eyes only when he heard a door click.
Jacob gasped for a minute in fright and then slapped himself mentally for not being careful. Only then did he notice that he was being held against a very cold hard chest and the unmistakable scent of him hit his nostrils as he went into panic as the arms released him. He willed himself to believe it was a dream and stumbled forward shaking his head and slowly looking back at him. His mind went into frenzy and his face showed his emotions clearly, there was anger, confusion, disbelief, betrayal, hurt, sadness, resentment but the most obvious of all was panic.
Edward's heart clenched when he heard Jacob thinking it was all a dream and he shuddered when the wolf turned to look at him in panic. Out of all the reactions he expected he certainly didn't expect the snarky wolf to go into panic on seeing him.
Jacob struggled to breath as he cringed and tried to make himself small as he shook his head as if to clear it away. 'Wake up Jake, wake up, it's a nightmare, WAKE THE FUCK UP!'
"Jacob, it's not a dream, it's me Edward" Edward said as he took a small step towards Jacob but stepped back when Jacob fell on the bed and hugged himself tighter.
'No, no, no, this can't be happening! No!'
Edward got desperate as he said "Jacob please, please…...just" he didn't know what to say to the wolf as he knew 'sorry' wouldn't be effective.
Jacob pulled himself together after a few minutes and snapped his head up to look at the vampire with an expression of horror and fright on his face.
A sob threatened to escape Edward's mouth as he saw the horror on Jacob's face, all the anger he could have handled but Jacob being afraid of him he could not deal with and he fell back hitting the wall as he brought his arms forward and crossed them in front of his chest to keep himself together. Immediately he heard Jacob's panicked thoughts in his mind.
'He's here, god he's really here!'
'Did Rosalie or Emmett tell him everything; I knew I shouldn't have trusted them! God, I don't….I can't handle this!'
Rosalie and Emmett knew Jacob was here, Edward now looked confused and grew angry at the thought of his brother and sister keeping this a secret from him but then again he never asked them about Jacob. As far as he knew, Rosalie hated Jacob and Emmett followed Rosalie so how could he guess that they were still in contact with Jacob now.
'Lucy…does he know, god, I can't let him get to Lucy…I…gotta get out of here before I go insane'
Edward felt pained as he thought about who this Lucy was, did Jacob imprint on this Lucy, he could tell from Jacob's thoughts that this person was very important to Jacob and he felt the protectiveness in his thoughts.
Jacob got angrier and angrier as the events of the past repeated over and over in his head and he clenched his teeth as he thought, 'I would never let him hurt Lucy the same way he hurt me' He finally got furious and gritted his teeth as he stood up and paced back and forth determined to keep his head and not shout. "What do you want?"
Edward looked stunned at the forced calm in Jacob's voice as he said "I…I just" he couldn't bring himself to say it but he shook his head and with a determined voice he continued saying "I want you back Jake, I know you don't want me but…."
Jacob laughed hysterically and humorlessly as he said "I don't want you? I don't want you?" Jacob continued in a hysterical tone, "I wish you didn't exist Cullen!"
Edward felt his undead heart break when he heard Jacob call him 'Cullen', Jake hadn't called him that ever since they first started going out and he was amazed that one word from Jacob could hurt him so much.
Jacob stopped pacing and looked back at Edward saying "Look, I don't know what you're trying to do here but whatever it is I suggest you piss off and get out! I SWEAR I'D FUCKING KILL YOU CULLEN!" but Jacob's thoughts were different.
'Oh dear god, his scent...I missed him, I missed him so much, no, no Jake, Lucy, you can't let her get hurt…you can't see her getting hurt…'
"I can't Jake…..I need you…"
"FUCK YOU CULLEN!" Jacob screeched heaving reached the end of his patience as he turned on Edward and punched him again and again as he let all the pent up frustration and anger out and Edward took it knowing he deserved it and much more for abandoning Jacob. They rolled to the floor as Jacob kept punching every inch of the vampire he could reach and he sobbed and his punches began to get lighter as he broke down and let the tears fall and sagged against Edward's cold chest.
Edward held Jacob letting him cry on his shoulders as he too shook with unshed tears and tightened his grip on Jacob, he was overwhelmed by Jacob's scent and murmured, "Jake, Jake, Jake"
"I love you so much Jake" Edward whispered and felt Jacob stiffen above him and before he could comprehend Jacob was out of his arms and up as Jacob said "Just don't…..don't" and rushed out of the room and Edward let him go and curled up into a ball on the floor surrounded by the heavenly smell of his lover.
Angsty? I know but review anyway, I finished this chapter at 1:00 in the morning so…yeah please review!
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