England couldn't feel his legs. He sat up and looked down. There was certainly still something under the blankets, but it didn't look anything like legs. He pulled the sheets away, revealing feet upon feet of massive green scales and gasped. What was this thing? He reached for where the scales ended and found that there wasn't some separate thing that had eaten his lower half in the night. Instead, they just flowed into his own skin. He ran his hands down his sides severally, feeling the transition between soft, slightly hairy skin and hard, smooth scale.

"What's wrong?" America asked, rubbing his eyes and pushing himself up.

"I-I think I'm half snake."

"You're what?" America opened his eyes and then gasped, "Damn, how did-"

"This must be the kink from last night." He said.

"You wanted to be half snake?"

England blushed, "No. N-not exactly. Japan's been on about these snake people recently, so I thought maybe-"

America smiled, "That's okay. Weird, but okay." He yawned, "For now, let's go get some breakfast."

He got out of bed and headed for the door. England tried to follow suit, but tails were nothing like legs. He tried to move his lower half down so it could support his weight, but instead he ended up falling out of bed.

"Are you alright?" America asked, coming back over and kneeling beside England.

"I'm fine!" England snapped, not wanting America to think he couldn't do something as simple as go down to the kitchen. He pulled his top half vertical. It was strange, like bending backwards, but it didn't hurt. "I can bloody well get around my own-" He had tried to move forward and fell flat on his face again.

This time America had the foolishness to laugh. England lifted his head and glared at him.

"Come on," America said between giggles, "Let me help."

He easily lifted him in what would be bridal-style if not for the way his tail dragged on the ground. England doubted it would be a good idea to walk like that, so, after several failed attempts, he wrapped his tail around America's belly. It made him feel safer too, like he wasn't going to fall. He threw his arms around America's neck for good measure. Oh, he was so warm too. Nice and warm, especially at the back of his neck and around his inner thigh where the end of England's tail had moved without his notice.

"You're colder than usual." America said, "But not quite room-temperature. Are you like half cold-blooded now?"

"I haven't the slightest. Can I just stay here?"

"I don't know how comfy that'll be, but it should be fine for now."

England hummed contentedly and placed his head on America's shoulder.

"What do you want for breakfast?" America asked, opening the fridge.

"I don't really know." England said, "I'm not very hungry."

America laughed, "You? Not want breakfast? Man, this snake thing is really hitting you hard."

England scowled but went around to America's back so that he could work.

America stroked England's hair and pulled bacon, eggs, and hash browns. He bustled around the kitchen, grabbing pans and cooking spray. England was content to watch him work, to feel those solid muscles moving beneath him. However, when America began to make his eggs, England was suddenly struck by how much he wanted one. But cooking it sounded so disgusting. While America's back was turned, he quickly reached out his hand, took a raw egg from the carton and swallowed it whole.

He blushed. Why had he done that? It was so disgusting! Not only raw, but still in the shell, it was so-

When America turned to throw his shells away England took another without thinking. Why were they so good like that?

America looked at the carton and blinked. "Did you just-"

"Yes," England said dejectedly.

"That's so cute!" America said, petting him again, "Should I get you some mice or something? I've had other snakes and they've liked those too!"

England blushed and buried his face in America's neck. "That- that won't be necessary."

America laughed and continued to cook his breakfast. He hummed off-key to himself, but England found it somehow relaxing. He held America a bit tighter. He felt overwhelmingly lucky to have him.

It wasn't too comfortable to be squished between America and a chair, but it wasn't too bad. It was worth it to keep holding him. He did reach out once or twice to snag a piece of bacon or a bit of egg, but he mostly just sat there.

He hissed affectionately and nuzzled America's neck.

"He-hey England. That's kind of distracting."

England looked and saw that there was next to nothing left on America's plate. He smirked and continued, beginning to run his hands down America's upper arms. America groaned softly and his fork and knife dropped with a clatter. England took that as his cue to slither around to the front to give him a kiss on the lips. America opened his mouth and sent his tongue to probe England's, but he quickly pulled out and pushed him away.

"What's wrong?"

"You have fangs. Why do you have fangs?"

England raised an eyebrow, "Because I'm half-snake?"

"Are you poisonous? I don't wanna die because my boyfriend bit me!"

England rolled his eyes, "You'd just come back to life anyway."

"But still."

"Alright. How about I kiss you then?"

He eased America further back into his chair and began to slowly trace the inside of America's mouth with his tongue. He had America moaning again quickly.

"Should I take us back upstairs?" America asked.

England smiled, "Please do that."

He held him close and they kissed as he walked. He stumbled going up the stairs once or twice, but he never fell. Once they managed to get to the bedroom, England detached himself from America and lay on his back.

"So, erm," England looked down at himself, "How do we do this?"

"Well, you should have an opening right down here." He pressed his fingers against a specific part of England's tail that made him squirm.

"W-what is that?" He asked.

"Your vent." America replied, rubbing it gently, "it's basically where you keep your everything."

"What?" England asked dreamily. He was as taken in by pleasure as he would have been if America was rubbing his inner thighs. All of a sudden, he felt something come out. He looked down to see two spiked protrusions sticking out between his scales.

"What the hell are those?" He demanded.

"Shit," America said, "I didn't think they'd have spikes all over them!"

"What is going on?" England asked again.

"Those are your dicks. Male snakes have two. I just didn't think that they'd be all-"

"Yeah," England said. "You don't have to touch them. I wouldn't."

America let out a sigh of relief, "Thank God."

Those spiked things were already starting to collapse and fold back in.

"Well, I suppose this didn't turn out that well," England said, "I'm going to have to tell Japan about the spikes. I feel like I ought to give you some compensation for this." He gently put his hands on America's waistband.

"Nah. Sorry, but the spiked penises killed it for me. Maybe later."

"I'm sorry, America," England said.

"Nah, it's fine." He stood and held out his hand to England, "Wanna go watch some TV or something?"

England smiled. "That would be nice." He pulled himself back onto America and wrapped his tail around his middle, "I like holding you like this."

"It's plenty nice for me too." America said, gently petting his scales. "Come on, big guy, let's go downstairs."

England settled back down on his shoulders, glad that he could at least give America his company.