I tried to hold off on writing a bit longer to make the suspense grow, but this is my first story, and I'm anxious so here's chapter 4: Emotions

Emotions

I couldn't believe what I just heard. " . You can't be dying. Noo. It's not true. TELL ME IT'S NOT TRUE!" When I looked at her, she was in tears. I was being completely insensitive. I rushed to her side and hugged her. I needed that hug just as much as she did. "Michael. I'm so sorry." I didn't understand what was going on. I was still in complete shock at what she had just told me. "Nikita, what is going on? Is it… Cancer?" After she was able to stop crying, she replied, "No. I have a kidney problem. My first one failed, and then I waited like 3 months to get a transplant. My blood type is rare so they said if another one failed there wasn't much they could do about it." She choked back some tears and continued on. "When I was at home, before I passed out, I felt this horrible feeling in my gut, and then I collapsed." I then took her hand in mine, and squeezed as hard as I could so that she could continue on. "Now here we are. In this same hospital... Michael, you have no idea all I went through with my first kidney. It was too much. All the pain, and pills. I don't think I can go through it again. I'm not strong enough. I don't even think that even if they did the procedure again, they would have another kidney to put in me. I mean O- is really hard to find. I-I-." She bursts into tears again. I hugged her with all the passion, love, and care that was possible. I can't believe how this mission has turned out. I was just supposed to befriend the Baker's and find out who they were dealing to (Using Nikita of course). Now look what it's turned out to be. I care for Nikita. I care way too much, this much I know, but I can't help myself. And now just when my feelings start to develop, she has to have this happen to her. Bad things always happen to good people.

As I was still hugging Nikita, we were interrupted. I would've been angry about the intrusion if it hadn't been Ilse. Nikita let me go and gave me a small nod, letting me know that she needed a minute to talk to her best friend. As I walked out of the room, I heard the loudest cry I've heard. It was the both of them. I looked through the window of Nikita's Hospital room to see Ilse, and Nikita hugging each other, and crying their eyes out. I don't really know Ilse, but from what Nikita's told me, she and Ilse have been friends for years. I guess she also helped Nikita when her kidney's started to fail.

After Nikita and Ilse had there moment, Ilse told me that Nikita wanted to talk to me. I didn't actually know what to say to Nikita. All I know is that I will do everything in my power to make her happy. No matter what it is.

I walked into the room, and she patted the other side of my bed welcoming me to sit next to her. I happily complied, and wrapped my arm around her waist. I held her so tight because I felt that if I let go of her for a moment, I would lose her forever.

"Michael, I need you to know something. If you don't want to get attached to me because it'll only hurt more when I leave, that's okay. I will fully understand." I looked at her in such disbelief. Then I just pulled her even closer to me, if that was even possible, and said "Nikita, you have no idea how much I care about you. I would switch bodies with you just so you could live, and I could die. I don't want to see you suffer. I don't want to see you hurt. But worst of all, I don't wanna see you… die, so I'll be here for you til the absolute end of this." I kissed her forehead. I didn't feel the need to tell her my real identity because although she deserved the truth, I don't know how this would affect her, so I voted against it.

I'm guessing I fell asleep because I was still in the same spot as I was earlier. Cuddling Nikita in her hospital bed. Nikita was sleeping so I decided to go home and do a little research. Nikita's isn't dying without a fight. She may be okay with dying but I'm not.

When I got home I decided to call Birkhoff. With him, the research could get don't a whole lot faster. Beep, Beep "Hello?"

"Birkhoff it's Michael. I need you to me a favor. I need you to look up all O- blood types in London."

"Sure thing man… Wait, why do you need to know where O- blood types are?"

"Can you do it or not, Birkhoff?!"

"Yeah. Just give me a second. (Jerk)." I heard him typing. Then her finally said "Okay Michael, there's a Natalie Walker, Gordan Michigan, Alex Henderson..." He named a LOT of people then what he said next caught me off guard "Wait what is this…. Michael, did you know that YOU'RE O-?" I am? Well that would make sense that only Birkhoff would have access to our records. I didn't realize what I said next I said out loud. "Now she doesn't need a transplant. I have O-. I can save her! I CAN SAVE HER!" Birkhoff said "What the-"he was cut off by me hanging up. I rushed to my car, and drove to the hospital as fast as I could.

When I got there, I ran to Nikita's room. I busted the door open and yelled, "Nikita, NIKITA! I'M O-. I CAN GIVE YOU MY KIDNEY!" I guess I woke her up or something. I haven't been thinking clearly so I probably didn't notice her sleeping, not laying. "You're O-? Oh my gosh! And you would give your kidney to me?" She couldn't have known how much I cared about her, but I always care faster than other people. "Yes, Nikita I would do ANYTHING to make you better. I don't even need both kidneys'…. But I DO need you!" With that being said, she kissed me with all the emotions I predicted she was feeling. Passion, thankfulness, and care.

3 months later

I was walking Nikita into her house, from the Hospital. She had just had her kidney surgery 3 days ago, and it was a success. I was hurting as much as she was since they did take my kidney. We both felt pain together. It was like we were connected. I made it to her room, she tried to take off her clothes, and get into her night clothes, but of course she couldn't do it alone. I didn't want to make her uncomfortable, so I walked up to her, put my hand on the bottom of her shirt and said "May I?" she smiled a weak smile and said "Yes... Thank you." I helped her take off her shoes, pants and shirt, and grabbed an oversized t-shirt. I helped her put it on and then after her head finally went through the shirt, I pecked her lips. I helped her into bed, and when she was fully comfortable, it occurred to me. As if on cue, she answered the question that had just popped into my head. "Yes, Michael, you can sleep with me. You ARE my boyfriend." She didn't have to tell me twice. I quickly took off my shirt, and pants, and moved on the other side of her so that we were spooning. I lay my cheek on hers, kissed it, then wrapped my arms around her and pulled her closer to me. I intertwined our fingers and we feel asleep surrounded by each other.

I woke up before her, and decided to make her breakfast. Pancakes, all types of fruits, juices, and everything else that was in her fridge that was edible.

She walked in just as I was setting the table and she, even in the morning, looked amazing. I still can't believe she's mine. "Good morning Nikita. I hope you're hungry because I've cooked every single thing in you refrigerator." She giggled and said, "Good morning babe. I'm starving! OOhhh pancakes!" I love making her smile.

After we both ate as much as our stomachs would allow, we lay in her couch cuddling. "What do you wanna do now?" She said, "I don't know. We could watch a movie."

As I looked through the channel's I saw that a scary movie was on. When I suggested it to Nikita, she went ballistic! "No Michael. I hate scary movies! It's all too real!" This was surprisingly amusing. "Nikita, nothing's real about these movies. There merely for entertainment. Please, just watch it for me. I'll protect you." I said with my arms wide open, as an invitation for her to hug me. She playfully pushed me in the chest, and we both laughed. She mouthed 'fine' and I started the movie. She sat next to me with my arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer to me as she layed her head on my shoulder.

One hour into the movie, I saw a side of Nikita that I'd never seen. She was seducing me. I looked at her and realized it was a big mistake because she captured my lips. We actually ended up making out until the movie ended. When the silence consumed the room, she sped the kiss up, and made it more aggressive. I lifted her up off of the couch and into my arms. You can guess what happened next.

That next morning, I felt soo happy. I looked to my left, and there was the source of my joy, my beautiful girlfriend. I decided to go home and handle some things since I've been completely shutting Division out of my head, and I've witnessed first hand what happens when you put something else before Division; they destroy it. So I kissed Nikita good bye, let her know I would be back later that night, and headed home.

As I was walking to my house, I felt like I was being watched. I looked around and saw no one, so I just shrugged it off.

Amanda's POV:

"Amanda, target is spotted. Should I go through with the kill? I have a clean shot of her right now."

"Agent Ricky, you're only objective is to be there as my backup. We can't have this plan go wrong. Are the surveillance cameras still set up?"

"Yes. I'm looking right now. Three in Michael's place, and five in Nikita's."

"Okay then. When the time comes, I'll let you know what to do with our little Nikita."

"Yes Amanda, but may I ask, why don't we just kill Nikita if you already know that Michael is falling, or is already in love with her?"

As I looked down at all of the pictures of Nikita when she was with Carla, and when she was 3 years old, I replied, "We have some unfinished business. Good bye for now, and remember: if you get caught, this whole operation goes to hell, do you understand me?"

"Yes, ma'am"

Michael's Pov:

I was awaken at 3 a.m by the annoying sound of my phone. I looked over to make sure I didn't wake Nikita, then grabbed my phone and hopped out of the room to answer it. "Hello?"

"Dude, it's Birkhoff. Percy says he needs you at Division for 3 days to do this with some new recruit's. Your flight will be leaving at 6 so hurry up!" Before I could reply, he hung up. I looked at my phone, then in the room just to see Nikita standing in the doorway. "Babe who was that?" She said pulling me back to bed. I tried to think of some clever lie to tell her but nothing came to me. Then I remembered something Amanda told me. 'The devil's in the details', she always said. It is true though. The best lies have the most truth. "Nikita, I have to go to New Jersey.. My job just called, and they need me. My flight leaves in 3 hours." As I looked in her eyes, I saw disappointment, and sadness. I already thought about her coming along, but that could lead to so many more problems for my life, her life, and the mission could be screwed, so she had to stay here. I was about to say my goodbyes at her place before I left it, but she wanted to take me to the airport, and say goodbye to me at the gate.

She helped me pack and me kissed like a million times. On our way to the airport, we held hands the whole time.

We were parked and were almost at the gate when I realized she wasn't beside me. I looked back to see tears in her eyes. "Nikita, what's wrong?" I said in the softest voice that has ever come out of my mouth. "I don't want you to go. I know you have too, and I know you probably don't want to leave me, but I can't stand being away from you. Michael I'm falling for you, and I don't want us to not be two houses away from each other!" I ran to her and hugged her as hard as humanly possible. By this time she was actually crying, and I hated every second of it. Of course I didn't want to leave her. I'm falling for her too. I'm just going to miss every aspect of her. I wish Division didn't exist to make us miles apart, but I can't leave yet. After I was done hugging her and she was done crying, I embraced her and kissed her with so much love, she knew I didn't want to leave her just as much as she didn't want me to go. I pulled away, and wiped the tears from her eyes, and said my last goodbye.

As I borded the plane, all I could think about was the life I was leaving behind, and how I missed her already. Her smile, her scent, her warmth. I feel empty without her, and now I have to endure that for another 3.5 days of nothingness.

Percy's Pov:

When he looked at the security footage of the airport, he realized what was really going on with Nikita and Michael. "Well that just won't do. I guess after this mission, we will have to kill her."

Michael's Pov:

When I landed the first thing I did was call Nikita. She was home now and I couldn't help but worry because my work could easily follow me straight to her. When we got off the phone, I promised to call her and tell her goodnight.

I walked into Division with the worst attitude. I knew now that I felt my place was no longer here; it was with her. I walked in operations to see Birkhoff sitting there, typing away. "Hey man what's up." I wasn't in the mood for small talk so I just cut straight to the chase. "What am I doing here, and how can I make my time her shorter?" He looked at me with confusion, then made an 'oh' noise with his mouth. I gave him a glare that said 'well, say what you're thinking.' Then he said the exact thing I was hoping he wouldn't say. "Oh my gosh, Michael! You love her don't you?" I was stunned and caught off guard by his quickness. "What? No I'm not. I just want to get home as quick as I can." I realized that I had just let 'home' slip out of my mouth. Damn it! "Your home? Now it's your home? I knew this mission should've been for someone else. You always get way to involved. Macy, now this Nikita chick? Dude, she's hot and all but-" I slammed his body into the wall. He got scared and semi-yelled "Hey man, calm down!" I said, "Don't you EVER talk about her.. EVER! Are you hearing me Seymour? You know nothing about her!" He was getting even more scared. "Okay man. Jeez calm down!" I put him down and rushed away to a place without cameras. I needed to hear her voice. It always calms me down.

After I called her I was 100 times happier, and amused. She said that when she went to the store after I left, someone asked her out. I got mad until she said it was a girl. She always knows the best way to make me smile. Even if she didn't know it.

After talking with Nikita, I walked to Percy's office to see if there was anything I could do tonight to speed up the process. He said no, so I headed home. When I got there, it was like it wasn't even my house. Without her scent, or an item of hers, its not the same. She is my home.

I called Nikita and told her goodnight, and went to sleep.

The next day, I woke up early, and went straight to Division. I got there to find out what I was supposed to do. I was supposed to monitor a capable recruit. She was in the federal prison so it took me 3 hours to do that. Her name was Sarah, and she will definitely make a great agent. Next I had to help this new recruit with his coping skills. He wasn't doing well, and he was a little crazy. His name was Owen. I would've thought he would be cancelled by now, but Percy saw 'potential' in him so I had to help him. I helped him for 5 hours. Then Percy wanted me to attend this meeting thing with him as his bodyguard, and that took that rest of the day. By the time I got home it was 11 p.m and I was exhausted!

I called Nikita and apologized for not calling sooner. She wasn't mad though. She said she expected me to be this busy so she didn't get her hopes up. She told me about her day I told her about mine, we laughed, we told each other how much we missed each other, and we said goodnight.

I woke up sweating, and breathing hard. It was about Percy finding out how much I cared for Nikita and killing her, and it was all my fault. I called Nikita and asked if we could video chat for a while. She complied as I got my laptop.

"Nikita, hi!" I said with the nicest voice I could. "Hey baby. What's up, and why are you up this early?" I just wanted to hug her so badly right now. "I had a bad dream. I can't sleep now, and I miss you like crazy!" She touched her chest in a playful way and said" Aww! Babe I miss you too! I can't wait til you come back tomorrow!" I smiled at her always being so uplifting. We talked for another hour before I let her go to sleep. "Goodnight
Nikki." She smiled at her nickname. "Goodnight Mikey."

The next day was filled with Amanda's therapy. She wanted to know 'how I was dealing with my mission.' She kept asking dumb questions that she knew the answers too. She finally asked a question that caught my attention. "So how's it going with Nikita. I mean she is a very pretty women so it would make sense for you to be taken aback by her beauty, and personality."
"Amanda, she is merely just a mission. She means nothing to me. When this mission is over, she will go on living her life, and I will live mine." At that last statement, I started to worry. What would we do after this mission? I can't bring her here. She loves London, and Ilse, and my building doesn't allow animals, so Kota wouldn't be able to come. There's too many obsticles. I can't leave her though. I won't leave her.

After my session with Amanda, I went home to board my flight back home. I got my stuff together and drove to the airport. I called Nikita and told her when I would land, then I hung up so I could get on the plane.

When I landed, and got to the gate, the first thing I saw was her. I ran towards her, dropped my bags, flung my arms around her, and spun her around. I did that for a full minute, and then put her down and I kissed her with soo much desperation, it caught us both off guard. Our mouths moved together in sync. She stuck her tongue in my mouth and I complied. I pulled away when I thought my face would turn blue from the lack of breathe. We stood there with our foreheads together, then she said, "Don't ever leave me again!" Then I said what I've been wanting to say for a while. "Nikita, I love you! I love you so much!" She smiled so big and replied, "I love you too Michael!" Then I picked her up again and held her in my arms.

I tried to make this chapter more about their relationship.

SPOILER ALERT: Next few chapters will be wrapping up the mission, and dealing with the kill order on Nikita, and an old character reappearance!