Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 4: What Now?
Without James Potter or Sirius Black around to tell their audacious lies, Severus actually got a chance to defend himself when Peter Pettigrew accused him of getting rid of the two fat-headed, egotistical dunderheads to the headmaster. All he cast was a shield charm, if they were messing around with a spell they did not fully understand, whose fault was that?
The Severus Snape of 1976 was lucky compared to the one in 1996, who was about to have two new students in his Defense against the Dark Arts sixth year NEWT class.
Hermione was already aware that there were new students since she took her prefect duties very seriously. She was looking forward to meeting them. Hopefully, their impression on the different method of magical education between the two countries would be stimulating. Hermione had no doubt of it because both boys had sorted into Ravenclaw.
She was disappointed when neither of them were in her Arithmancy class. Hermione tried to find out more about them from Anthony Goldstein, the male Ravenclaw prefect in her year that was also in Arithmancy, however he vaguely replied that it would probably take them time to settle down and get to know them better. He alluded that their move to Hogwarts may not have been voluntary since they were complaining about everything.
Hermione already knew what was wrong. Ravenclaws. They weren't exactly a welcoming group. Not like Gryffindor. She would be happy to help them both out and get acclimated. In fact, she could already imagine how much time they could spend together in the library.
When she lined up with the others outside Defense, Hermione looked about trying to catch sight of them.
Mandy Brocklehurst and Morag MacDougal arrived to join the queue and shared with the other Ravenclaws, "They lost us twelve points!"
"What?"
"From Firenze!"
Padma looked confused at that, then answered, "Well, isn't Divination their main focus, rather than regular magic?"
"I hope so because if they start goofing off like that in this class, there won't be a single sapphire left in our hourglass."
Hermione was unsure of what to make of this gossip. They liked Divination, and got Firenze to take points? What would they make of Trelawney? Hopefully, Padma Patil had it wrong that Divination was their favorite subject. If they only just got here, she probably had no idea what they really enjoyed.
The arrival of the new students was preceded with the sound of raucous laughter and the shout of, "So like you get your hair cut by like a dog groomer?"
Pansy Parkinson arrived and marched past the line, hissing to herself.
One of the two was still answering, "Like totally," to the other when they arrived.
The new students looked odd. Their skin was a uniform golden toasted color, their straight teeth were blindingly white, and their dirty blond hair with plenty of shining highlights, even in the dim corridor, was long, yet it was artistic in its unkemptness.
The broader one stopped, and looked aghast as he pointed in Hermione's direction, "Like, oh my god, does this one even like know what a hairbrush is?"
The second one stopped, lifted his upper lip as he stared, equally shocked, and replied, "I know right?"
"Should like shave it off and start over."
"Totally."
"Oi!" interrupted Ron.
"Ugh, another one. Like no mirrors where you from?"
"What?"
"That's not very nice," Harry commented. Hermione said something at breakfast about transfer students. Maybe someone had hexed them to insult everyone they met.
"Shut up, dork."
"What?"
"His hair's like pretty messed up too."
"Not like her. Worst. Hairstyle. Ever."
"For sure."
"Silence," Prof. Snape announced, his voice carrying, even though he was coming from an unexpected direction, rather than from within the classroom.
The headmaster had summoned him for a little chat. Severus knew it was not going to go well when Prof. Dumbledore cheerily opened with an off-color joke, uniquely his own.
"A jelly baby goes to the doctor's.
"It exclaims, 'Doctor, I think I might have caught a sexually transmitted disease!'
"The doctor answers, 'Don't be silly. You are a jelly baby.'
"To which the jelly baby explains, 'I know, but I have been sleeping with Allsorts!'"
Following that nonsense was a question about a spell he blocked from James Potter in 1976. Severus blocked so many spells from Potter and Black that none were particularly memorable.
The headmaster's persistent questioning for close to ten minutes regarding a single spell was aggravating. Perhaps if the old coot had done something twenty years ago, there might have been one memorable spell, rather than a daily struggle to avoid pain and humiliation.
Severus doubted that was the last he would hear of the subject, however he currently had a class to teach … with Potter.
Some dunderhead chose to ignore his command for silence and he heard something that sounded like, "Whoa! Like seriously epic buzzkill, dude."
To which someone else answered, "Like totally."
"Take your seats without discussion."
Two unknown Ravenclaws were staring at him in slack-jawed fascination. Prof. McGonagall had said there were two transfer students from California Conjuration this morning. Transfer … obviously a lie. No one transferred to Hogwarts. What was the headmaster up to now? Were these Order members in disguise? From their behavior, possibly. Why not place them in Gryffindor to guard Potter more closely? Their gormless looks would look natural in Gryffindor.
When Severus glanced at his class roster for their names, he almost visibly shook his head in disgust. It was difficult to restrain that impulse especially since the headmaster had such a high opinion of his own cleverness.
Since the two could be adult wizards, Severus asked them to pair up for another exercise in nonverbal magic. This class was dismal and if these two new 'students' did not pay attention, someone could end up in the infirmary.
"Newman, Redford, you two pair up this time." He was unaware that the two had already insulted and alienated the rest of the class so they would not have many clamoring to partner with the new kids. Severus added, "By the way, here we do not perform magic skyclad."
There was some snickering at Prof. Snape's comment about skyclad magic. Everyone had already assumed these two were from the United States by their inferior way of speaking. The comment also distracted Hermione from her thoughts. Newman and Redford sounded awfully familiar, but where had she heard those names before?
Ron was insistent on working with Hermione today, so Harry faced off with Neville.
Things did not go well, right from the start. Hermione and others caught out of the corners of their eyes that Newman and Redford were casting whispered spells at others in the class, whenever Prof. Snape was occupied with correcting someone else. Some students started casting spells back at them, but they appeared to be proficient with protego.
Harry had not noticed since he was waiting to shield himself from Neville, and was concentrating on his fellow Gryffindor as Neville's forehead furrowed and he made rocking motions to try to force a nonverbal spell out to hit Harry. Harry was waiting for him to finally lose control and whisper the incantation, rather than mouthing it.
Having delayed long enough, Severus loomed over Longbottom, hissing, "Longbottom, are you so incompetent -?"
"Longbottom!" hooted one of the new students.
"Like what a lump of lard!"
"Totally. As much of a retard as his father."
"Worst. Wizard. Ever."
"No duh."
"I know right?"
The two of them chuckled over their comments, unaware of what had happened to Frank Longbottom.
Even Slytherins were surprised by that rudeness. Others in the class, who were not privy to the story of Neville's parents, but knew that Neville lived with his grandmother, were shocked too. Neville's face grew immediately red, but Harry was more surprised at the way Snape's head whipped to glare at the rude Ravenclaws. Normally, he reserved that sort of snake-like motion to strike at Harry.
"Silence." Severus was more unsure who these two were now. Why would Order members insult Frank Longbottom? To gain the trust of Slytherins? That was too idiotic an idea. Insulting Potter would be easier. Perhaps they were new? Recent Gryffindor graduates that Dumbledore gave this assignment to protect Potter? He added, "Two points from Ravenclaw." Neither of them seemed concerned at losing their house points.
His black eyes scanned the other students before he announced, "Switch partners. Since you appear to enjoy pseudonyms, how about Elvis here," Harry was not surprised that he was singled out, but that Snape called him Elvis, "pair up with Redford, while Rocky," Hermione was insulted to see Prof. Snape point at her, "pairs with Newman."
Hermione realized where she heard Newman and Redford before. Those were famous actor names. And two new students at Hogwarts were using them … and Prof. Snape did not care if he exposed them, nor that someone might realize that he knew muggle names by saying pseudonyms. As she moved to where he indicated, she thought it funny that he called Harry Elvis, but why did he call her Rocky?
Facing her new dueling partner, Hermione asked, "What's your name again?"
"Paul Newman, but it's not like I'd ever go out with you. What's with like that gnarly hair? Do you even like bathe? Pee-you. Even like a bag over your like head wouldn't do it."
Hermione huffed. She was not asking him out and she definitely did not stink. And another thing, he didn't even look one-tenth as good as the real Paul Newman. Even an older Paul Newman. Without further discussion, Hermione decided she'd be casting the nonverbal spells while Newman attempted to block them and flicked her wand to cast the first one.
Harry answered the question 'So your name's Elvis?' with "Sure is." He had no doubts that this fellow knew who he really was, but at the moment, Harry did not care. That comment about Neville's dad was uncalled for.
"The rest of you, resume your practice," Severus called, before physically steering Longbottom by the shoulders to face Weasley.
"Cast a shield spell, Longbottom."
"Uh, out loud?"
"Yes."
"Uh, all right … um," Neville did the wand movement sloppily while incanting, "Protego."
Severus was placated that Longbottom at least remembered the spell, but when cast so weakly, it would hardly stop anything.
"Cast it more forcefully and move your wand quicker. You'll never block anything that way, Longbottom."
Malfoy spared a jealous glance towards Longbottom. What a waste to teach him anything. Worthless lump's wand would probably go flying out of his sweaty, pudgy hand if he ever got into a fight. He already hated the new students too so didn't care if Potty and the mudblood or the American idiots got hurt.
Meanwhile, Ron tried to concentrate on the instructions he just received. He had to cast something slow, at both Neville and Snape, who was standing right behind Neville, so the git wouldn't get hit with anything because Neville was large enough to shield him.
Neville's instructions were equally simple. Block the spell. But bloody hell, Prof. Snape was standing right next to him. How could he do anything right under this sort of pressure?
Ron was about to cast a jelly legs jinx at Neville when Snape twisted and barely moved his wrist to cast a fast protego in the direction of the new students.
"Twenty points from Ravenclaw. Ten points from Gryffindor."
"What?!"
"Silence. Resume casting at your partner only."
Ron cast a jelly legs jinx aloud, as requested. Neville's wand came up to begin the shield spell, but Snape's had already finished casting it, held out so it was within Neville's line of sight next to his own wand.
"Cast it faster, Longbottom. You need to complete it before the spell reaches you."
Prof. Snape's wand twitched again as he blocked an errant spell from Newman that was aimed at either himself of Longbottom. Newman made a face, then got hit with a stinging hex from Granger right in the nutsack.
"Totally like no fair," declared Redford, shooting off a nonverbal spell at Granger, who blocked it. Since Harry was paired up with Redford, he saw no problem with casting his own stinging hex, targeting the center of his forehead.
Malfoy cast his own stinging hex at Potter's rump.
As open warfare erupted, Prof. Snape warned, "Settle down." Severus cast a nonverbal, modified finite incantatum that did not include Redford, Newman, or Potter.
"Ten points from Ravenclaw. Five from Gryffindor."
"Bitchin'."
"Another five from Ravenclaw for profanity."
Ravenclaws were fervently hoping that Prof. Snape would get these two expelled, but they weren't good enough at casting spells at him, or even Longbottom, to do more than lose a lot of points.