Unlike the others in the session, Eridan never made it to the end of his planet. At least not on his own. The angels had overtaken him, and he wasn't exactly sure what went down, but all he knew was that after those gruesome creatures had surrounded him, he had fainted. When he woke, he was in a position very similar to the one he blacked out in, curled up and wrapped in his cape, shivering through the cold. He wished the damn thing was thicker. He didn't even care that somehow, he had been moved into this unfamiliar room. He just wanted to stop existing, he was tired and at this point death sounded like a pleasurable experience.

As if summoned by these dark thoughts, a knife appeared in his hands, the same one he had used to spill his own blood back on Alternia. Eridan gulped, remembering that awful sensation of not being in control, a puppet to some unseen force. But then he recalled the strength, the determination and that blissful night of dreamless sleep that followed. His hands shook, tears forming in his eyes. No, cutting was pointless! It wouldn't get him attention, and it wouldn't solve anything. But when he felt that wicked tingle in his arm he quickly pressed the blade against his vein, letting the blood trickle down himself before he could be taken over again.

Eridan let the blood seep from the wounds until he was seeing stars dancing across his vision. Then, he crawled over to the chest in the corner of the room, tearing a towel from inside into strips to bandage his mangled wrists. After that he allowed himself to sink into nothingness. When he finally woke after what felt like days, he felt… Rested, something that was no longer the norm. So he decided to pull on his computerized glasses and log onto trollian. He learned by reading some of Karkat's memos that a large number of the other trolls had been contacting some sort of alien race, making friends, making trouble, or just spying on them in some way. He supposed it could be amusing if nothing else, and it wasn't like he had anything better to do with his time. This became Eridan's routine. Cut until he fainted each night, get solid rest, and wake up to his computer, proceeding to irritate humans. In this time, the highblood ate only what was crucial to surviving, but getting sleep at night did make a difference, even at the heft cost of bodily harm.

One morning though, he woke extremely aggravated. Even with his new strategy, Eridan had received another chilling nightmare. This one hadn't been about angels, or death, it had been about his past. It dug up old memories that cut him deeper than any knife ever could. In his childhood, happy things, like magic, had been a large part of his life. Now, he insisted it was all fake. It had failed him so many times. So it was with a foul attitude that Eridan logged onto trollian that day. As if to give him an emotional slap in the face, waiting to greet him was a live feed of one of the female aliens flitting about with a pair of black wands. He growled in irritation. He had discussed the matter with that one before, what was it with the humans and being so thick skulled and stubborn?

caligulasAquarium[CA]began trolling tentacleTherapist[TT]

CA: wwho are you tryin to convvince wwith this ludicrous poppycock
TT: ?
CA: magic is NOT REAL
CA: wwhatevver youre doin its not real its somethin else outright entirely
CA: its fancy and impressivve and all but its not the fuckin figmental storybook claptrap you wwanna make out like it is
CA: so howw about you get off your high skyhorse
TT: Why do you keep addressing me as if I'm some sort of spokesperson for the reality of magic?
TT: You can't needle me into a defensive posture on the subject. I just don't care.
CA: youre not usin magic just DEAL WW IT
TT: Fine. You win.
TT: These are science wands. I am a charlatan.
CA: ok i didnt say that
CA: so fuckin smug
CA: maybe if I can give you a few lesions in manners you could teach me how to bulshit magic like that in return
TT: You want to learn magic?
CA: yes teach me your secrets wwitch
TT: Sure. Let's begin.
TT: Consider this your first lesson in showmanship.

caligulasAquarium's [CA'S]computer exploded.

"Jesus, fuck!" He cried, chucking the sparking glasses at the wall just before they could burst into flames. "God damn she villain!"

"Did you expect some sort of freaking matespritship?"

Eridan's heart nearly stopped. "You," He whispered, pushing himself back against the wall. "I thought you were gone."

"I've been… Busy," He said, a new sort of bite to his tone. "So I'm not in the mood to tolerate your bitchy problems, or the fact that you have nothing better to do than piss off some prissy human."

"But it-"

"I don't give a shit!" He barked. "Now shut up, someone's coming."

Before Eridan could say another word there was a sharp rapping on his door, followed by Kanaya, who entered with both hands behind her back. The seadweller swallowed, it had been a long time since he'd seen another troll.

As expected, she hadn't come for a pleasant chat. She had come to talk about that rose human and her stupid magic tricks. That fake, computer destroying magic. He couldn't afford to hear about that then, he was falling apart as it was, but the jade blood kept on talking, digging up the memories that he just could bare to face.

But he had no choice; Kanaya was forcing him to remember.

Now Eridan hadn't always been so touchy on the subject of magic, in fact, as a little kid he was quite fascinated in it. Back then, Eridan spent almost all of his time in a beautiful, deep sea reef. Coral grew in all colors; aquatic lusi swam about in every shape and size. Music was always playing, nonstop, music was the heart of all life under the waves. The reef was a very special place to anyone with fins, not just Eridan, because the entire area just happened to be the young Princesses front yard. Through this oceanic lawn, an eager violet blood was swimming at top speeds, a long purple cape billowing in his wake. He was happy, always smiling back then even if it was more of a smirk. He was only four sweeps old, and his morail lived in a big, pretty castle, not unlike the ones they built in the sand. When he neared his destination, he could see her hand waving enthusiastically, wrists adorned in bangles of shimmering gold. He felt a tickle in his gills and a fluttering in his heart. Seeing her was what he lived for. He slowed to a stop, panting as he drifted to her side. "Salutations, Princess," He greeted her breathlessly, sweeping into a bow so low his glasses slipped down his nose, too big for his face.

She giggled, combing through the mane of black curls with her fingers before dipping into a flawless curtsy in return. "Why, hello there, Sir Eridan!"

The young noble blushed and took her hand, letting their fingers intertwine. Feferi ran her thumb over his rings, batting her eyelashes at him. He swallowed hard, feeling his fins get all warm, and before he could gather his wits, Feferi was torpedoing forward, pulling Eridan along. Moraliagence was sweet; they knew everything about each other. For Eridan, that wasn't too big of a deal, he had a pretty bad habit of running his mouth too much and was pretty much an open book to anyone on land or in the sea. Under the waves, everyone knew him as an outstanding child prodigy, his musical talents the center of attention, just as he liked it. But only Feferi knew him as the captivating wizard he really was. "Do it again," She begged him, gaze trained on his. Her eyes were just so huge, filled with admiration and wonder that he just couldn't let down. Chuckling, he closed his eyes and lifted his hands, stirring them through the water, creating a stunning wall of color that sparkled and swirled around her. "It's so pretty," She gushed.

"You're pretty too, Fef," He whispered bashfully.

She leaned in closer through the fog of color, her round eyes glittering. "I know," She teased. "I'm a princess, I get that all the time. Try again."

"You're a piece of wwork," He giggled. "Wwhat if… I show you a very special trick, one just for you, no one else."

"No one else?"

"Not one other."

She leaned even closer. "Promise?"

"I promise," He said, scooting closer and lowering his voice. "This magic trick wwill make you more than just a princess… It'll make ya the vvery best you can be."

He knew her very well; she'd do anything to escape the boundaries being a princess held over her. "Do it!" She whispered.

The violet blood smiled, pulling her in and pressing his lips gently against hers in the sweetest kiss he could manage.

The magic was supposed to make Feferi's heart all his, forever, and for the moment it seemed to work. The same white light that had surrounded his fingers while he created the rainbows was now swirling around the two trolls. When the boy finally pulled away, his princess flushed pink. They both giggled.

Not bad for a first kiss, but Eridan felt a vicious pang in his heart at the memory. The trick he had performed so many years ago, failed. Feferi clearly didn't love him anymore; he had realized it sweeps ago, even before they broke up. But he couldn't help grasping at straws, fighting to keep her in his corner, but he supposed she had no interest in someone who couldn't do something impossible, leaving him all alone. "Magic is fuckin fake," He cried. "Wwhy wwont you understand, its gonna do nothin but hurt!"

"Well you have happened upon a bit of luck my friend," Kanaya said calmly. From behind her back, she pulled out a sleek, elegant, white wand crafted in the shape of a lightning bolt. When he was a kid, he had always wanted one just like it. He swallowed hard and she continued. "This is not magic, think of it a science wand if you must. And I am sure you will accept it without retaliations on me or any innocent alien females, correct?"

Eridan's arm reached out on its own, grasping the wand and tugging sharply. His eyes stung. "Wwhatevver Kan," He said through his teeth. "I'll… I'll leavve her alone."

Before the seadweller regained control of his arm, he felt his sleeve slip just enough to reveal the heavy, bloodstained bandages covering his wrists. She gasped, and he recoiled, hiding the arm inside his cape with tears of shame pouring down his cheeks. For a moment, there was genuine concern in the jade blood's eyes. Eridan looked up, pleading at her with his eyes. That voice had him by the throat and he couldn't speak, but he was desperate. He knew Kanaya had a life, her own troubles to deal with, but maybe she would be able to save him. And maybe, with a bit of luck, she'd stay with him, if for just a little while.

But no, the moment ended as fast as it had come. Kanaya left him alone with his wand, his heart ache, and the darkness creeping through his mind without as much as a smile.

He hung his head, squeezing the wand tightly in his fist. He could feel his own power amplified by the weapon, but he told himself it was all fake. Deep down he knew that when it mattered, the childish spells would fail him.

"Get up," The beast snapped. "pull yourself together, she doesn't give a shit of you're desperate, get up."

"Wwhy?" He mumbled pathetically. "Wwhat's the point?"

"I'm going to teach you to fight."

"Fight wwho?" He asked, gripping the thin fabric of his cape. There was only one villain he could think of at that point in the game. "I'm not strong enough to face-"

"Face who, Jack?" He guessed, giving a harsh chortle. "Now why would I train you to fight ME?"

Eridan stuttered helplessly while the dark figure came into view. Part dog, part bird, part harlequin member of the midnight crew, Jack stood before the trembling seadweller and drew the bloody sword from his middle, stance that of a fighter ready to strike. "Get up," He barked.

The troll scrambled to his feet, pressing back against his wall with his wand held at the ready. He hadn't even thought to draw it; the tool was like an extension of his arm, like it was made for him. "Wwhat do you wwant wwith me?"

"I want to make you stronger," He rumbled, voice lowered to an evil purr as he paced the length of the room. "I want to make you into a hero straight from those books you salivate over. Isn't that what you want, to make your enemies pay?"

"My enemies? I don't really have-"

"What about all the landwellers, or that pissblood that stole your girlfriend? We could torture them all until they beg us to kill them!"

"But I really don't-"

"And what about all those people who left you to crumble? You know that Virgo noticed your scars, you saw she didn't give a shit!" When Eridan paused, the beast smirked, adjusting his grip on the shaft of his sword and raising it high, aim locked on the troll's neck. One stab would kill. "You deserve better, you are better, don't tell me you've lost your will to live."

Another pause, and jack growled with frustration. "A damn shame, bit if you want to die…" He swung, blade cutting through the short distance in less than a second, but for Eridan, everything went incredibly slowly. He was going to let jack take him, he was going to give in. He had lost the will to live a long time ago, his life didn't matter anymore. But then he thought about all of the others, even the landwellers. Most had never been to kind to him, and they never thought to lend him a hand, but Eridan just couldn't let them all die. Not like that, not by Jack's hand. So, with his wand already positioned to fire, Eridan released a rush of energy straight from his soul. His aura pulsed white and strong all around him, until finally, he forced it through the tip of the wand, shooting Jack's sword right out of his hand. The monster smirked, watching as the troll struggled into a fighting stance, breathing hard and heavy. "Not bad princess," He chuckled. "But now it's time to get real."