Disclaimer: I don't own any rights to the Teen Titans or any characters in the DC Universe.
"So you've been spying on us Bruce?" Robin asked indignantly.
"I wouldn't call it spying. Your 'Tower' stands out like a sore thumb in Jump City bay.
"But friend Cyborg says that it is immune to the dropping of eaves."
The Dark Knight snorted.
"You can tell Cyborg that it's very easy to eavesdrop on the Tower. Especially when Raven loses her temper and blows out every window in your not so subtle headquarters."
"That's only ever happened once!" Robin snapped.
"Nevertheless, your Tower is nowhere nearly as secure as you think it is. How many villains have breached your defenses? I seem to recall that Mad Mod, Control Freak, The Puppet King, The Hive and Deathstroke have successfully stormed your headquarters."
"Thanks for reminding me Bruce." Robin replied sarcastically. "I had almost forgotten."
"Never mind." The Dark Knight deadpanned. "If you two are going to be of any help to me we're going to have to train Starfire."
"I do not understand Batman. Robin is always having us train to improve our skills." She complained.
"I know, but you must understand that the Joker is beyond any villain you have fought before. He is so dangerous that he makes Deathstroke, your nemesis, look like an amateur."
The princess cross her arms and scowled at Batman.
"I know who the Joker is. Robin has told us much about him over the years."
Batman snapped back at her.
"Then he hasn't told you enough, otherwise you would be afraid."
Starfire's eyes began to glow.
"Are you saying that I am a coward Batman, that I am a weakling who should be afraid of the Joker? I am a warrior of Tamaran!"
The Dark Knight had his back to the princess and spun around. He had a small purple can of aerosol in his hand, which he sprayed in the Tamaranian's face. At first she looked nonplussed as Robin stared in horror, having a good idea of what Batman had just done. At first nothing happened to Robin's immense relief, but then without warning Starfire began to giggle. A few moments later she was chuckling.
"R-r-r-robin, wh-wh-what is ha-ha-happening to me?" She asked as she began to laugh uncontrollably.
"R-r-r-robin, he-he-help me!" She shouted between guffaws as she fell to the ground.
"Bruce! Give her the antidote! Now!"
Batman produced another small can of aerosol from his utility belt and sprayed it into Starfire's face. Almost instantly Starfire's laughter subsided. Once it had stopped completely she stood up again. From the look on her face Robin could see that she had been and still was terrified.
"Lesson number one, never underestimate the Joker, and lesson number two, always expect the unexpected when dealing with him or his henchwoman Harley Quinn. When the Joker is involved there's no room for …"
Batman paused.
"… for even a single mistake." Robin completed the sentence as he wrapped his arms around Starfire.
The Dark Knight approached the princess. Raven had always intimidated her with her powers and dark personality, but she realized right there and then that Batman was far more intimidating than Raven ever could be.
"Do you really wish to help me Starfire?" He deadpanned.
She had regained her composure and replied in confident voice.
"Yes Batman, I do."
Bruce walked over to a nearby desk and opened a drawer, retrieving a cardboard box that he placed on top of the desk. As Robin and Starfire approached he opened it and they could see that it contained a brand new Batgirl costume and the utility belt that went with it. He turned back to the princess and handed the box to her.
"You and Barbara are about the same size, so this should fit you. It has the new cowl with the opaque eyes covers, so no one will be able to see you green eyes." He reached into another drawer and pulled out a small jar. "You can wear this makeup on your face to hide your alien complexion." He then removed the utility belt from the box. "You will need to learn to use this belt's contents Starfire. Robin will begin to train you right now."
Robin looked confused.
"Bruce, she has superpowers. She's almost as strong as a Kryptonian. Why have her learn to use our weapons? And why have her dress as Babs?" The Boy Wonder asked.
"I need her to impersonate Batgirl. I don't want anyone to figure out that Barbara was Batgirl; it would put her in danger. I need Gotham to see that Batgirl is still on patrol but it won't do any good if your girlfriend flies around, uses her superhuman strength or fires star bolts at villains while dressed as Batgirl."
Robin puffed his chest out. "Starfire is a quick learner. She'll be ready to go out on patrol with me tomorrow night. And I guarantee you that no one will be able to tell that she's not Batgirl."
The Dark Night gave his old apprentice a long look.
"That's a big promise. You'd better get started Dick." And without another word he turned and left the Batcave.
"Robin, I now see what you meant when you said that the Batman was a 'jerk', and I also now understand why you became separated from him."
Robin shook his head.
"No Star, something's wrong with Bruce. He's not normally like this …" His voice trailed off, the concern was clear and evident. He then turned his focus to his girlfriend.
"I think we'd better get started with the training."
"Do you think I will be prepared tomorrow to be the fake Batgirl?"
"You're already familiar with most of my weapons, so it should be quick. Go ahead and put on the costume and the utility belt. Before anything else you need to become familiar with each compartment in it…"
In a dark, abandoned warehouse in one of Gotham's derelict business districts the faint glow of a large plasma TV illuminated the mostly empty building. The building consisted of a single room that had tables covered in blueprints and there were also dozens of workbenches with all sorts of bizarre, incomplete projects on them, from the cobwebs on some of them it was evident that many had been abandoned and forgotten months ago.
There was a small loveseat in front of the TV and there were two people sitting on it, watching the Gotham Eyewitness News on channel 5. Commissioner Jim Gordon was being interviewed and the couple watching the TV was not pleased. Gordon spoke:
"I am very pleased to announce that the original Robin, Batman's first partner, has returned to Gotham from Jump City, where he has been serving successfully as the leader of the Teen Titans for the past 5 years. We are very happy that Robin has returned to us in our time of need and I know that he will be successful in helping Batman and Batgirl capture the Joker."
Gordon paused.
"Joker, I know you're watching this. Go easy on yourself and surrender. I promise that you will receive a fair trial and …"
Gordon's speech was interrupted by several gunshots, which instantly destroyed the TV.
"Why'dya do that for puddin'? That was our last TV."
"Why? Why you ask? Didn't you hear a word he said Harley? He expects me to surrender simply because the original Boy Blunder came back to Gotham."
"Gordon's a jerk Mr. J. We all know that. But now I can't watch American Idol, and it starts in an hour."
"Fine, fine, I'll have one of the goons go out right now and steal an even better TV for you Harley."
Harley smiled.
"Thanks puddin', yer the best! So what are ya goin' to do with the Bat Brat?"
The Joker began to chuckle.
"What do you think Harley? The same thing I did to his replacement!"
Harley Quinn looked concerned.
"Is that a good idea Mr. J? He's one of those Teen Titans now."
The Joker tsk-tsk'd his shapely henchwoman.
"Those prepubescent children are highly overrated Harley. Killing the original Robin will be good for a laugh."
Harley continued to look worried.
"I don't know puddin', some of his teammates are kinda scary, especially that witch girl."
The Joker smiled and patted Harley on her head as if she were a small child.
"Don't you worry your pretty little head Harley; I've got everything under control. This time we're going to kill both Robin and Batgirl! That'll put a potato into the Batmobile's tailpipe!"
The warehouse echoed with his maniacal laugh.
The sound of several locks unlocking roused the snoozing cat from its slumber. The tabby yawned and stretched before making its way to the door to greet its master, who quickly entered the small apartment and slammed the door shuit behind her, engaging each of the 5 locks on the door.
Lisa Ashmore was still wearing her flight attendant uniform as she kicked off her shoes. The tabby greeted her by rubbing itself against her legs. After dropping her purse on the small kitchen table she bent over and petted her feline companion.
"Hi there Pharaoh, it's good to see that someone appreciates me, unlike that no good Michael McKenna. Can you believe that I've been assigned to his crew for every shift for the next six weeks? And the scheduler blew me off when I asked to be assigned to another crew!"
Lisa walked up to a mirror that hung on the wall and undid her hair, which she had to keep in a tight bun at Captain McKenna's request. Had times not been so hard and the pay so good she would have flipped him off and quit. But most airlines were paying new flight attendants about half of what Wayne paid her, so she put up with his crap.
Of course, that didn't mean she couldn't have some fun. She pulled a very thin point and shoot digital camera from one of the pockets in her slacks. She walked over to her desk and turned on the display on her iMac and placed the camera in its docking station. She launched iPhoto and uploaded all of the pictures she had on the camera. She had taken quite a few during her 1 hour break at Jump City. It had been her first time there and she took dozens of shots during her break, including a few of the near legendary Titans Tower. But those were not the pictures she was interested in, at least not at the moment.
Once the camera finished uploading its JPEGs to the iMac she began to browse through them, until she found the ones she wanted.
It was against company policy to take any pictures of passengers on the corporate jets, even with their permission. This of course didn't stop the mousy flight attendant. She smiled as she reviewed the pictures she snapped while Grayson and his babe were napping.
"It has to be her." She muttered out loud as she opened Firefox and Google'd 'Teen Titans Starfire'. The results came back instantly and she clicked on the links to images. She selected a large picture of the alien standing next to Robin, and it appeared in her browser. She quickly compared the two.
"Pennyworth said she was disguised." She muttered out loud as she continued to compare the two pictures.
"It's her alright! He's dating the alien! I knew it!"
Lisa then read the article that accompanied the glam shot of Robin and Starfire. That article prattled about how the alien and the original Boy Wonder were an item in Jump City, they were the city's celebrity couple.
"Guess what Boy Blunder? Richard Grayson just stole your girl!" She chuckled to herself. She was extremely pleased and began to wonder how much a gossip magazine would pay for the candid photo. If it was enough it might even be worth getting fired for it. Best of all, she could tell Michael McKenna to go frak himself.
Lisa leaned back, feeling please with herself. She took a second look at the two pictures, this time focusing on Dick Grayson and Robin.
"Whoa! Wait a minute!" She shouted, startling her cat.
She opened the picture of Robin and Starfire in PhotoShop and stared at it. Lisa was a digital shutterbug. She didn't have a boyfriend so she spent a lot of her free time dedicated to her hobby. Using an airbrush tool she removed Robins mask.
Let's see, Grayson has blue eyes…
She opened another photo and using the crop tool she cut and pasted the eyes onto Robin's face.
"No freaking way." She slowly muttered in astonishment. There was no mistaking what she was seeing.
"So Robin didn't lose his girl after all."
A wave of pure excitement poured through Lisa Ashmore. Her discovery, it was worth a fortune. She quickly calmed herself.
I need to be sure.
She opened the online edition of the Jump City News. Just as Batman had a section dedicated entirely to him and the entire Batclan in the local Gotham newspaper, the Titans also had a couple of pages dedicated to them in the Jump City paper. Lisa quickly scanned the current articles and she soon hit pay dirt.
"Robin and Starfire missing in action during Titan battles with Johnny Rancid, Control Freak and Plasmus!"
She then opened a browser to the online Gotham newspaper.
"Commissioner Gordon announces that original Boy Wonder to return to Gotham."
"I was right!" She shouted as she picked Pharaoh up and kissed him. "Pharaoh my dear, did you know that Dick Grayson is Robin?"
And then the full realization hit her.
"And that means that Batman is Bruce Wayne!"
"Wheeeeeee!"
Robin watched as Starfire swung across the ravine in the Batcave, hanging on to the grappling rope she had just shot at the ceiling of the Batcave. The alien swung across with perfect grace, and as she cleared the chasm she released the rope and performed a perfect flip in the air, landing with the grace of an Olympic gymnast.
"Was that acceptable Robin?" She asked eagerly. She had been practicing for over an hour as the dozens of ropes hanging from the ceiling bore witness to. His grin was all she needed to see.
"It was perfect Star. I only have one final comment. Don't say 'wheeee!' while you swing."
The Tamaranian giggled. Robin couldn't make up his mind whether she looked cute or unbelievably hot in the dark spandex costume. Barbara had changed her costume since he left for Jump City, trading her light gray costume for the black costume with yellow highlights that Starfire was now wearing.
Robin had spent the night working with the Tamaranian and was pleased with the results. Not only had Starfire quickly learned to mimic Barbara's moves, she had mastered all of the weapons and tools in her new utility belt, although she initially had trouble with one of them.
"I think we're done here Star. Would you mind bringing all those grappling hooks down from the ceiling?"
"Certainly Robin!" She replied cheerfully as she flew up to ceiling.
As Robin watched her retrieve the grappling hooks he heard a pair of footsteps approaching.
"Good morning Master Richard." Alfred greeted him as looked up at Starfire levitating near the ceiling. "I must say, a flying Batgirl! I suppose it makes sense, after all bats do fly."
"That they do. Oh by the way Alfred, I need you to do me a favor."
"Why certainly Master Richard, what may I do for you?"
Robin rubbed the back of his neck.
"Well, you see, during training Starfire had a little … accident."
"My word! Her highness hasn't injured herself, has she?"
Robin chuckled. "She's fine Alfred."
"Well then Master Richard, do tell, what happened?"
"It was when I was showing her how to throw batarang. You know how strong she is?"
"Of course Master Richard, her highness is almost as strong as a Kryptonian."
"That's right Alfred. Anyway, we had a little accident with one of the batarangs, she ... broke something."
"Oh my, Master Bruce won't be amused. What was it that was damaged?"
Robin gestured to Alfred to follow him and led him to the far side of the Batcave where he pointed at the Batmobile, which had a batarang embedded in its supposedly indestructible windshield. Alfred laughed at the sight.
"I shall replace it immediately. Master Bruce will be none the wiser."
Jinx was tapping her foot impatiently in the courthouse hallway. She along with Raven, Beast Boy and Cyborg were waiting outside the judge's office to have the very brief wedding ceremony performed. She had called her boyfriend, Kid Flash, over her Titan's communicator a whole minute ago. He said that he was at their apartment in Central City at the time told her he would be there in a 'flash'. She had winced at his bad pun, he was worse than Beast Boy, she thought to herself.
"Where the hell is he?" She grumbled.
"Relax Jinx." Raven reassured her. "You only called him a minute ago."
Just as Raven finished speaking Wally showed up, in his usual supersonic fashion. He was carrying a pizza box.
"Don't tell me you went to New York to get a pizza!" Jinx growled at her boyfriend.
"New York? Why would I go to New York for deep dish pizza? I went to Chicago! Anybody want some?"
Jinx slapped her hand against her forehead.
"I already told you that were all going out for a fancy lunch after the ceremony, and since you're late you're buying!" She hissed.
"Ok, so you guys don't mind if I finish the pizza by myself?" He asked.
"I'll have a slice." Cyborg spoke up. Jinx gave him a death glare.
"On second thought, I don't want to spoil my appetite." The Tin man replied as he slowly backed away.
"Oh well, more for me." Wally said gleefully.
Jinx glared at her beau.
"Can't you think of anything besides food? Raven and Beast Boy are getting married!"
Before Jinx finished speaking Wally had polished off the entire pizza, which he devoured at super human speed.
"What'd you say Jinx? I couldn't hear you while I was chewing."
Beast Boy hid behind Raven as he saw TWO veins throb on Jinx's forehead.
"THAT DOES IT WALLY! WE'RE THROUGH! I don't know what I ever saw in you. You're an oaf who can't stop eating or thinking about food. You know why I asked you to come? I was hoping you would get a clue, but now I see that WAS TOO MUCH TO EXPECT FROM YOU!"
Kid Flash tossed the now empty pizza box into a nearby trash can. Then with no warning he dropped onto a knee and produced a small ring box, which he popped open exposing a dazzling ring.
"Actually I was in New York when you called, at Tiffany's." He smiled.
"So what do you say Jinxie?"
Sorry for the missing spearators (I just added them). Please review!
I'm almost done with the final chapter of Wild Man, still working on the epilogue.
I hope you enjoyed this chapter.