Part IV: Adventures in Weapons Maintenance...
Immediately following the previous interlude...
As though she were finally noticing how disarrayed her clothing was, not to mention her hair, Cordelia looked down at herself, and made a face followed by a couple of halfhearted looking motions toward possibly straightening things up. She ended up just waving at her ensemble, huffing, throwing up her hands and shooting a half hearted glare at Xander.
"Jeeze, Major Horndog – did you have to practically rip my clothes off while we were at it?"
"Well, it did turn into a pretty thorough and realistic search demo, Private Cutie," Xander said, starting to grin.
"Oh boy – did it ever," Cordelia said. Her eyes glazed over again momentarily, and then she huffed, blowing a few errant strands of hair away from her eyes.
The huff did wondrous things to her uncased tits, and Xander felt his dick twitch in his pants in time with every bobble and jiggle. "Guh... " he said, as what little blood he had left in his brain rushed southward to support the troops.
"Hrrm?" Cordelia blinked at him, glanced down at herself, and then shrugged, giving him a malevolent looking smirk and a kind of a 'what, these?' impish look as the renewed bobbling rendered him inarticulate again. Reaching up, she casually began undoing the three buttons holding her top together beneath her exposed breasts.
Xander was pretty sure he heard each of those buttons give a heartfelt sigh of relief as the strain was taken off of them. Or maybe that was just him.
Letting the skimpy top fall open and away from her tits, Cordelia then undid the front clasp to the half bra, getting a matched groan of released tension from the straining material.
"So, now what should we do?" Cordelia asked, giving him her best innocent expression as she casually tugged the hem of her skirt down over her hips.
"Guh hummana?" Xander said.
"I said, what's next, sir?" Cordelia said, fluttering her eyelashes at him.
"Ahhh... " Xander gave his head a slow shake, more than tempted to smack himself in the temple with the heel of his hand a few times. Lack of blood flow to the brain couldn't be doing him any real good... "Oh! Right. Weapons, ah, gun cleaning drill. Yup."
"You said that, sir," Cordelia said in her very best ditzy phone sexy. "How should we start this?"
"Well... " Xander finally managed to get his brain, blood flow, and speech centers realigned briefly. "The first step is to carefully free the weap- ah, gun from its protective wrapping."
Nodding seriously, Cordelia looked at him expectantly.
After a long, long moment, a look of comprehension finally crossed her lovely features after Xander raised and lowered his eyebrows at her several times, finally ending with glancing down pointedly at his crotch, and then at her hands.
"Oh! Okay, free the gun," Cordelia said, nodding. "Boy, they sure didn't teach us this stuff in basic!"
"I'm real sure your drill sergeants were thinking real hard about it," Xander said as she sashayed her way over to him and then dropped down onto her heels to squat down with her face directly in front of his zipper.
"You really think so, sir?"
"I'm pretty damned certain of it, yes," Xander said.
"Hrrm," Cordelia said. Sticking the tip of her tongue cutely out of the corner of her mouth, she frowned in mock concentration – or maybe real concentration, hey, that orgasm sure looked like it was pretty mind blowing – and reached up to pull down his zipper. After unzipping him, she worked for a minute at the buckle of his belt and got it open, tugging the tongue out through the clasp and undoing the snap to his fatigue pants.
"Oh, my," she said, after getting the pants undone. Xander, ah, sprang out and to attention in front of her face, bobbing gently in the Sunnydale night breeze. "I see you took 'going commando' literally tonight, sir."
'I didn't want to have to bury another pair of boxers,' Xander managed to think, 'With full military honors, yet,' just before his girlfriend completely derailed his train of thought and his brain all at once...
Cordelia took the term 'taking things well in hand' literally herself by doing just that with Xander's bobbing erection. Xander groaned and arched his back, standing, ah, very erect as her fingers closed around his shaft.
His eyes rolled all the way back into his head briefly. Xander wouldn't have been a bit surprised if they both came up the other side with 'Jackpot' symbols and change started spewing out of his mouth...
"Gnnngg!" he managed to groan out, "Careful. It might go off."
"I can see that," Cordelia said as a couple of dribbles of precum spurted out over her fingers. She rubbed the ball of her thumb around, smearing the slippery stuff over the head of Xander's cock and getting another heartfelt groan out of him. "Pretty dangerous thing you've got here, sir."
With a massive effort of will, Xander managed to reach down and pull Cordelia's stroking hand away from his hard dick just as she was licking her lips and parting them slightly before leaning in.
"Huh?"
"You're getting ahead of yourself, Private," Xander said. It came out harshly between pants and gritted teeth. Cordelia would probably never know how much effort that cost him... "Before we get to the gun cleaning part of the exercise, we need to get it properly dirty so that you're not just going through the motions down there."
"Oh. I see," Cordelia said, blinking up at him.
With a grip around the wrist of the hand he'd pulled off of his now whimpering erection, Xander drew her gently up onto her feet. Lowering his face toward hers, he tilted his head and captured her lips with his own, kissing her slowly and then with increasing urgency and roughness.
Just about the time that Cordelia's knees were starting to wobble again and she was melting into him, Xander half grinned and half groaned into her lips and pulled back. Her protesting sound turned into a startled yelp as he used the hands he was gripping her by the hips with to spin her around and give her a mostly gentle but urgent push toward the wrought iron and wood slat bench.
"Umm, sir?" Cordelia blinked at him over her shoulder, looking confused, but went along willingly enough with his push and steerage of her. She yelped and jumped when he encouraged her with a sharp smack of the flat of his hand on a still exposed cheek.
That drew major Cordy glareage, but hey – he couldn't have resisted if he'd wanted to. Xander answered the glare with a lopsided grin and an eyebrow waggle, and Cordelia huffed irritably and continued on.
The knees of Xander's pants stuck to his own knees and made squishing sounds as he followed his girlfriend over... he did his very best to not find that hysterically funny and break out laughing. Xander didn't really think Cordelia would see the humor in it that he did. Jeeze. He'd better not wear these anywhere near the school until they'd been steam cleaned. He'd have every guy at Sunnydale High following him around sniffing with their tongues lolling out and their tails wagging. No. Just... no.
Bad enough having every girl at SHS doing that after the love spell.
Reaching the bench, Xander guided her with his hands into bending over until she was leaning forward from the waist and gripping the arm of the bench with both hands. Reaching down, he rucked the skirt up over her ass cheeks again until it was bunched up around her waist under her belt.
Kneeling down behind her again – and taking a moment to properly visually appreciate the view of her ass that that position gave him – he took hold of the waistband of her panties. Being careful not to stretch or tear them, he slid them down over her ass and along her legs until they fell to the ground around her ankles.
"Don't mind me," Xander remarked, smirking a bit, "Just appreciating the good looking privates this unit has."
Cordelia made a sound that was half snicker, and half outraged squawk, and then started giggling.
"Oh, so that's why they call this rank that, huh?" she said, starting to laugh.
"I'm not sure that's what the brass had in mind, no," Xander admitted, "But it's what comes to my mind."
"It does, huh?" Cordelia said. "Gee, I wonder why?"
"Have no idea."
Once again pausing to appreciate the view, Xander then stood up behind his extremely hot girlfriend and pushed down on the waistband of his pants until they were down a bit farther and out of the way. Stepping in a bit, he pressed his raging erection into the cleft between her gorgeous ass cheeks.
"Umm... Commander?" Cordelia asked again, raising both eyebrows at him while looking back over her shoulder at him, slightly askance. "May I ask what exactly you have in mind here?"
"Sure, no problem," Xander said, pressing her cheeks together around his cock. Moving his hips slightly, he watched with fascination as the head of his dick slipped down between them until it almost vanished, and then slid back up. "In field use, your gun can get into all sorts of tight situations and get dirtied up."
"Uh... not that I have a real problem with you getting dirty on me, Commander," Cordelia said, frowning back at him, "But if it gets dirty where I think you're heading, there's no way that this soldier is cleaning it. Get me?"
"Check. Get too dirty and I'll have to stroke down my own gun. Got it."
Cordelia giggled at him again, and arched an eyebrow. "So?"
"I'm saving that for later," Xander said, with an eyebrow waggle. "The purpose of this demonstration is to show how one's, ah, gun can get into all sorts of places and get covered with all kinds of disgusting fluids in the field."
"Disgusting, huh?" Cordelia said, scowling again. "So... sex is disgusting now?"
"Only if we're doing it right," Xander said, deadpan. An outraged look replaced the frown, and then Cordelia burst out laughing.
"Got me on that one, Commander. But... are you sure this is really appropriate activity for a patrol, sir?" Cordelia asked, still looking back over her shoulder at him with her eyes wide. "I mean... what would the Colonel say?"
"The Colonel can damned well get his own privates to oil his gun up for him," Xander growled. Working his hips, he continued sliding his hard prick between Cordelia's cheeks while holding them pressed around himself and –
– Oh, crap. That might not be such a great idea.
Too much more of this and he would go off and paint Cordy's hair, the bench beyond her head, and the slaying bag full of gear with cum. Apparently, several hours of making out without relief combined with having an up close ringside seat to Cordelia's gushing orgasm had gotten Little Nighthawk a little bit excited.
Okay, more than just a little bit.
Hastily, Xander released Cordelia's butt cheeks and pulled his hips away. He could almost imagine he heard Little Nighthawk let out an outraged and frustrated squawk at the sudden absence of smooth warm flesh around it. He could really sympathize...
"Sir?" Cordelia looked back again, curiously.
"Ah... just making sure that my, uh, gun doesn't have an, ah... accidental discharge, Private."
"Wouldn't want that to happen, no sir," Cordelia said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
After he finally quit twitching and subsided a bit, to the point where he suspected that he was no longer just about to shoot, Xander reached down and positioned himself right at Cordelia's entrance.
"Ummm... Commander?" Cordelia's eyes widened and she said, "What about the no sex in- unghhh!"
The sudden grunt probably came from Xander moving his hips and abruptly sheathing himself inside of her still wet pussy all the way from tip to base, he suspected...
And oh, God that felt good.
Little Nighthawk apparently agreed with him. He almost could swear it gave a contented sigh at suddenly finding itself surrounded by moist, hot, and incredibly tight Cordelia Chase.
"Hrrm? I didn't quite catch that, soldier?" Xander asked, giving her a bland look. Well, as bland as he could manage, under the circumstances. She opened her mouth to say something, and was interrupted by Xander sliding out almost to the tip and shoving forward again.
"Oh, God, unghhh!"
"Oh. That's kinda what I thought you said," Xander managed to grunt out. He began slowly stroking in and out of her with long slow thrusts, enjoying every fraction of an inch of it.
"Bastard," Cordelia hissed out, sounding like it was coming from between gritted teeth. "Ugnhh. Oh... uh... oh!"
"So, should... I gather... that we're... uh... doing it right?" Xander said, speaking between thrusts as his brain threatened to melt on him. It wouldn't take much of this before his overly sensitized dick went over the edge – and probably took his brain out with it when it exploded.
"Oh... God... yes. Per... fect... " Cordelia gasped as he hit bottom again inside of her. "But... I... thought... we... ungh! Oh, God, fuck it!"
If he'd been able to manage speech at the moment, Xander would have pointed out that he was fucking it. Just as well: he figured the sarcasm might get him killed right about now. Or castrated. Or both.
Instead, he gave himself over completely to what he was doing, namely, stroking in and out of Cordelia's tight self. He was kind of vaguely aware that after a few minutes, she began to gasp and then her hips were jerking and undulating, working herself up and down along him as he shoved into her.
Xander was a bit too wrapped up in the sensations of Cordy's hot pussy sliding along his engorged erection to really notice her own reactions at the moment. Luckily, he was pretty sure that she'd gotten off hard enough just a bit ago that she wouldn't begrudge him if he finished before she did...
Besides, he was pretty sure that if she had another orgasm like that last one any time soon, he'd be pouring his twitching and comatose girlfriend into her car and rushing her to the emergency room. And that would suck. Not to mention it'd be majorly embarrassing.
Okay, it'd be massively good for his stud points, but that would be balanced out by having to explain to Mr. Chase why his little girl was in the hospital... twitching and moaning. Xander figured he'd be about three sentences into that story, max, before he'd be dead so fast his body wouldn't have time to hit the ground first.
"Well, you see, sir, we were doing sexy military role play in the cemetery and she came so hard she had a seizure... "
BANG!
And you just never get past the Pearly Gates when that happens. Saint Peter just takes one look at you and points straight down, via the express chute.
A few minutes later, and Xander wasn't even having those barely formed thoughts and mental images. He began to slide into Cordelia in short hard thrusts, vaguely aware of her making harsh moaning sounds and shoving back against him.
Then, as an unmistakable pressure began building up somewhere deep in his balls, he slammed root deep into her, pulling Cordelia back against himself until her ass cheeks were flattened up against his hips. His cock pulsed, twitched, and then apparently turned inside out on him...
"Oh... ugnhhh... God, Cordy... " Xander said, as black spots swirled around the edges of his vision, and then everything went dark around the edges. "Fuck!"
Still holding Cordelia around the waist, Xander slowly bent forward until he was almost lying along her back with only her stiffened legs and arms holding them both up. The pressure in his nuts finally released like a dam bursting as he began to pulse what felt like an endless stream of cum into his girlfriend, over and over.
Every time Xander felt like he was just about finished, Cordelia would move or her hips would jerk and twitch, sending a new wave of sensation through his glans and causing his overly excited prick to spasm and erupt again.
Finally, after what felt like months and couldn't have been, he gave one last pulse and twitch and finally nothing more happened when Cordelia moaned and wriggled against him. Well...
Nothing, as long as you counted an incredibly pleasurable sensation all along the length of his hardon 'nothing'.
"Oh... damn." Xander shook his head, started to raise it slightly, and then gave it up as being too much effort.
"Wow. And... I'll say," Cordelia panted out from under him. "Uhnnn... damn."
"I'd ask if it was good for you too," Xander said, panting heavily, "But I don't think you have enough energy to whop me one properly and I'd hate for you to hurt yourself trying."
"Gee. How thoughtful of you," Cordelia said, also panting with her head down. "Get off of me, dork."
"And gee, the romance is gone already," Xander said, sighing. With a massive effort, he managed to get his eyes to uncross. Kind of.
"We just had wild screaming sex in a graveyard. How much romance could there be here?" Cordelia asked, ever practical.
"Ah. Right." Xander nodded, or at least bobbed his head a couple of times. He straightened up off of where he was leaning across Cordelia's back with his arms wrapped around her waist, or at least attempted to. "Uh... I'm not sure I can."
"Amazing, considering that you just did," Cordelia said, slowly turning her head to look back at him.
"No. Get off of you, I mean. I don't think I can move yet."
"Oh." Cordelia's eyebrows lifted at him, and then she shook her head. "Well, I'm not sure I can hold both of us up in this position, Geek Boy. So unless you want to have a really embarrassing pileup on the concrete here and me hurting myself... "
"No, no, let's not have that... "
"Good."
Twisting at the waist, she kind of half straightened and shoved at him with one elbow – a process that ended up with a wide eyed Xander half standing before rolling off of her back and landing on his side on the sidewalk with his pants around his knees.
"Ow." Rolling over onto his back and breathing heavily, Xander rubbed his elbow with his other hand and glared up at her. "Double ow."
"Sorry. Are you all right?" Cordelia said, her eyes widening. "I didn't mean to, uh... "
"I'm fine," Xander said. "Only my ego is bruised. And my ass."
"You'll survive."
"Nice to know that you won't fall over, at least," Xander said, still half glaring at her.
"Women and children first," Cordelia said sweetly.
"That's only in lifeboats," he told her, starting to smirk. "Hey, you know that I can see up your skirt from down here?"
Both eyebrows hitting her hairline, Cordelia looked down and gasped, then flushed slightly. "You mean the one I'm wearing bunched up around my waist?" Sighing, she reached down and yanked her skirt down more or less over her hips.
"That would be the one, yeah," Xander grinned up at her and started laughing.
"Oh, shut up." Shaking her head, Cordelia glared down at him briefly, and then started laughing, herself. "Come on, dumb ass," she said, bending over and reaching down a hand. "Get off the sidewalk, you look like an idiot down there."
"Gee, thanks. That would explain why I feel like one," Xander said, grumbling. Taking the offered hand, he let her help him up to his feet.
It was a bit of an effort. Cordelia finally had to grab his wrist with both hands and bend over at the waist and pull before he managed to wobble up and stay there. Then she had to grab him around the waist and support him with an arm over her shoulders until his legs quit being cooked noodles and black spots stopped dancing in the edges of his vision.
"Boy, we definitely don't have to ask if it was good for you, huh?" Cordelia said, giving him a critical looking once over.
"Oh, God no."
"I must always remember to only use these powers for the Purest Good," she said, smirking at him.
"Hell, use 'em for the blackest and darkest of Pure Evil if you want to," Xander said, panting heavily, "As long as I'm along for the ride."
"I'll try to remember that," Cordelia said, starting to snicker. After a moment, Xander joined in and then they were both leaning on each other having hysterics.
Once he was finally standing on his own – and no longer going into hiccuping giggle fits – he pulled his pants up and fastened the waist snap while Cordelia bent over again and pulled up her underwear, settling it on over her hips under the skirt. Not a major problem at this point: apparently Little Nighthawk had gone comatose and deflated for the moment. Not even the perspective of looking up Cordelia's long, tanned legs and at the underside of her tits from below had gotten more than a lazy twitch.
After they'd both more or less straightened out and refastened their clothing, after a fashion, they both retired to their bench with kind of a mutual and unspoken agreement. Cordelia sat down next to him with one leg folded over the other, half facing him, and began idly coming out her sweaty hair with her fingers.
"Wow. You look fantastic. And hot," Xander said, starting to smile at her. Reaching out a hand, he began brushing sweat stuck strands of hair away from her cheek and eyes with his fingertips.
"Once again, a sweaty and disheveled mess," Cordelia said, rolling her eyes. But she was smiling when she said it, so that was okay.
"I kind of like that look on you."
"What, rumpled and fresh fucked?" Cordelia arched her eyebrows at him.
"That one too," Xander said. Their eyes met, and then they both dissolved into laughter.
"Well, considering how often you're seeing it these days," Cordelia said, finally winding down, "It's a good thing, huh?"
"Me guy," Xander said, gently pounding his chest with the fist of the arm that wasn't stretched along the back of the bench behind her shoulders. "Me like look of my woman after asserting guyhood."
Her eyes widening incredulously, Cordelia gave him a 'I can't believe you just said that' look and then burst into laughter again.
Finally, after she wound down into mere helpless snickering, she looked at him while shaking her head and said, "God, you are so very lame."
"Yeah, but you like me that way," Xander said, giving her his best earnest puppy dog look.
Cordelia stared at him, and then broke out snickering again. "God help me, I so really do, for some unfathomable reason." After a long minute, she looked at him curiously, raising an eyebrow. "What?"
Xander stared back at her, his mouth open. "You said 'unfathomable'. I heard you."
"Yeah?" Cordelia's other eyebrows joined the first one. "And what's so wrong with that?"
"It has more than three syllables," Xander explained. "And it's not even remotely related to shopping, clothes, fashion, or money."
Shaking her head, Cordelia whopped him solidly on the chest. "Jerk. I do know a few big words, Mister Skeptical."
"Giles would be amazed," Xander said, grinning at her.
"We'll have to tell him," Cordelia said, giving him an impish look. "Along with describing our amazing technique for increasing my word power."
"You just want to watch him harrumph and start polishing his glasses back into sand," Xander accused her, fighting a grin.
"Well, yeah, of course," she said, and they both broke out laughing again.
"It's mutual," Xander blurted out, looking at her seriously. Cordelia arched her eyebrows inquiringly, and he elaborated. "I really like you too. A lot."
That got him the full wattage Cordelia Chase Pepsodent commercial smile, accept no substitutes, this offer not available in any stores that mere Xanders can afford.
"Cool," she said, nodding. Holding up a hand, she added, "And don't get too mushy on me, dweeb. A cemetery really isn't the place for undying declarations of true love."
"Heh. It could be," Xander said, "Under the right circumstances. Or the really wrong ones."
On cue, they both looked over at the grave of Dearly Departed Andrew the Equipment Boy.
Which was still undisturbed. Pristine.
"Ratz," Xander said. "How long is he planning to sleep in tonight, anyway?"
"That does it. I'm digging him up," Cordelia said, glowering at the grave. "Get the shovel from the car, would you, dear?"
"Sure," Xander said. "Uh... do you have a shovel in the car?"
"No. Dammit. Phooey."
Later...
"Hrrm," Cordelia said, licking her lips. Looking up at him, she frowned prettily and gave him her best vapid and gullible look. "Are you certain that this is the proper method that's recommended for gun cleaning, sir?"
Xander looked down to where his girlfriend was currently kneeling in front of him, between his spread apart knees with her face above his once again raging hardon. It hadn't taken more than around forty minutes of increasingly hot and urgent groping and kissing session for Little Nighthawk to wake up and decide he wanted to rejoin the festivities.
Probably starting out with him blinking his one little eye dazedly and going, 'Whut? Whut the fuck hit me?'
"Oh yeah," Xander said, fervently. "One hundred percent certain, Private Cutie."
Giving the waistband of his black pants one last tug, Cordelia left them bunched down below his knees and leaned forward, eying his bobbing erection a bit dubiously. "I don't remember seeing anything like this in the manuals, sir."
"It's, ah, we're now delving into aspects of soldiering that aren't contained in the manual, Private," Xander said, improvising desperately.
Giving the stake in his hand a slightly uncomprehending look, he absently handed it to Cordelia. Who took it from him just as absently, and then looked at it and gave him a 'what the fuck should I do with this?' look.
At Xander's half shrug, she shrugged as well – doing wonderful things to the cleavage showing above her half bra and open shirt – and stuck it down into his right cargo pocket.
"Oh. So this is one of the things they don't really teach us about in boot camp, right?"
"Right. You got it, Private," Xander said, nodding.
Mostly because Xander was pretty certain that drill instructors hated being brought up on charges for sexual harassment and abuse of authority, but he wasn't about to go into all that. No point in ruining a perfectly good porn fantasy with facts...
"Hrrmm." Shrugging again, prettily, Cordelia leaned forward and slowly and sensuously ran the tip of her tongue along the length of Xander's hard dick from base to head. When she reached the little slit in the end, she jerked back, her eyes going wide.
"Sir! It... twitched at me!"
"Ah... that was just to let you know that it's properly primed for cleaning now, Private," Xander said, ad libbing furiously.
"Riiiiggghhhttt... " Cordelia said, giving him a skeptical look. Her lips twitched several times at the corners, giving Xander the impression she was having just a little bit of a hard time keeping a straight face here.
"Well, we did do a pretty good job of getting it properly gunked up for this demonstration," Xander said.
Cordelia's expression at that was pure outrage.
"Gunked up, huh. Is that the technical term for that, sir?"
"Yup. Sure is."
Rolling her eyes, Cordelia gave him one last exasperated look before turning back to the project at hand. Grasping him at the base, she angled his erection toward her lips, and leaned back in again.
"Oh." Pausing, Cordelia glanced up and frowned slightly. "Do make sure and keep a close watch, sir. I'd hate for the enemy to sneak up on us here."
"Don't worry," Xander said, "I have my eyes peeled for anything along those lines. Carry on."
"Oh, I will, believe me," Cordelia said.
Just for good measure, Xander wrenched his attention off of his impending blow job and threw a hasty glance toward the grave they were supposedly watching. Yup. Still undisturbed.
Oh well. As long as the late Andrew stayed down for the next while. Xander was not just going to kill the vamp if he decided to pop up now and disrupt the blowjob he was about to receive, he was going to make it painful.
Probably by bludgeoning him to death with an inflamed hardon.
Opening her mouth slightly, she leaned the rest of the way in until the head of Xander's cock slid between her lips with excruciating slowness. He leaned back on the bench, groaning as Cordelia's hot mouth slid down along the first couple of inches below his glans, and then her tongue began swirling gently along the underside.
She raised her head abruptly, the head of Xander's dick slipping out from between her lips with an almost audible pop.
"Guh!" he said, his eyes jerking down toward her and going wide.
"Hrrm. Wow. That's a really odd taste," Cordelia said, frowning. She licked her lips slowly. "Dried Xander cum and dried Cordelia... "
"Uhhh... " Xander said, blinking at her.
"So that's what I taste like," she said, looking contemplatively at his hardon.
"You, ah, wondered?"
"No. But now I know, anyway," Cordelia said, grinning up at him.
"You're planning to tease me to death, aren't you," Xander accused her.
"Not so as you'd notice, sir," Cordelia said, giving him her best cat with canary whiskers smile. "But at least we know you're in no danger of erectile dysfunction."
"No, but I may die of permanent blood loss to the brain," Xander said, rolling his eyes.
"Poor baby."
"You know, somewhere around here," Xander said, eying her with a mixture of intense frustration and anticipation, "There's a hot private who's looking to get demerits in her service jacket."
"Really?" Cordelia's eyes widened comically and she glanced around before looking up at him with a wondering expression. "Where?"
"She seems to be kneeling down in front of my dick at the moment," Xander told her, "About to fail a gun cleaning exercise."
Cordelia's eyes widened even farther and her eyebrows went up. "Egads!"
"Egads?"
"Gadzooks?"
Boggling at her, Xander's lips started twitching at the corners and then he snickered. Rolling his eyes, he let his head fall back and gazed imploringly up at the heavens. "I give up."
Nodding, Cordelia gave him an impish look and said, "They say that surrender is the first step to victory, sir."
A startled laugh huffed out of Xander and he stared at her. "They so do not!"
"Oh." Cordelia eyed his hard on skeptically. "Then it must be 'Fortune favors the bald'. Or is that Star Trek? I forget."
"You made a Star Trek joke?" Xander boggled at her. "You?"
"Sorry, sir." Cordelia gave it a long beat, and then said, "I don't know what could have gotten into me, sir."
Spluttering, Xander shook his head and started laughing again. "I have a pretty good idea, Private," he said, waggling his eyebrows.
"So," Cordelia angled his cock back down toward her lips again while asking, "How do you clean your, ah, gun when there's no good looking privates around to do it for you?"
Not waiting for an answer, she leaned forward and slid her lips over his head again, taking him all the way down to the root in one quick smooth motion.
"Unggghhh!" Xander arched back up off of the bench, accidentally thrusting his hips at her face and forcing himself deeper in until he felt the head of his cock come to rest against the back of Cordelia's tight throat. Panting, Xander paused until his eyes stopped bugging out, and then said, deadpan but in a hoarse and slightly ragged voice, "Oh, that's easy – I do it the old fashioned way."
Cordelia nodded, the motion causing her head and closed lips to bob up and down an inch or so on his erection. The sensation was indescribable and it derailed Xander's speech centers again momentarily.
When they came back online, he added, "I use a thawed chicken."
Cordelia let out a strangled squawk, kind of like that imaginary chicken's last words – a thing that imparted another indescribable sensation to Xander's dick – and jerked back so fast she left poor Little Nighthawk blinking his one tiny eye in confusion.
"You what?"
"Just kidding."
"Oooohhh... you... " Xander grinned at Cordelia's glare and outraged expression, and she shook her head, rolling her eyes. "You are one sick puppy, Xander."
"Nah, perverted," he said, going deadpan again. "Sick is when you use a live one."
"Oh, God... " Cordelia gave it up and collapsed forward laughing with her head in his lap. Long minutes later when her shoulders stopped heaving, she raised her head again, causing her still sex and sweat tousled hair to drag silkily across his erection. "I swear to God, Xander, you are... "
Apparently unable to find a term that was descriptive enough, she shook her head and then leaned down and took him in her mouth again.
Grinning, Xander found his hands clenching on the front edge of the bench as Cordelia's hot, tight mouth and lips slid slowly along the length of his shaft. Pausing for a long moment there with his full length pressing along her tongue and the head wedged into the tightness at the back of her mouth, she took a deep breath in through her nose. Then she slid her face down until her nose was buried in his pubic hair and he was seated all the way in with the tip lodged firmly at the back of her throat, and swallowed hard...
The feeling of Cordelia's slippery tongue working against the underside and her throat constricting and clenching around the glans nearly sent Xander arching off of the bench and into low earth orbit.
"Glllnnahh!"
Looking up at him with her lips wrapped tightly around the base of his cock, Cordelia slowly closed her left eye in a deliberate and evil looking wink... and did it again.
This time Xander's ass left the seat of the bench completely as his hips bucked upward and a strangled sound wrenched its way out of his throat. Black spots danced around the edge of his vision and his hands clenched so hard on the front edge of the bench that he was amazed that it didn't come loose between his fingers.
Xander was vaguely aware of Cordelia making gagging sounds as the head of his cock lodged impossibly deeper into her tight throat. He groaned from the sheer ecstasy of the tight hot feeling around the head. Then he groaned again as she pulled back a few inches, coughing around his shaft.
"Ohhh... uggh... guh."
Finally, his legs unclenched and his butt slowly sank back down onto the seat, his vision starting to clear.
With one final cough, Cordelia closed her lips back around him, and slowly slipped her mouth back down to the root – not as far this time. She didn't quite send Xander into orbit again...
With excruciating slowness, Cordelia slid her lips and tongue along the length of his shaft as she pulled her head back from the base to the head. Pausing for a moment, she eased her head back down, and then up again, slipping her mouth slowly, and then more rapidly up and down over just the first few inches of his hard dick.
"Uhhh... "
Xander's eyes squeezed tightly shut as he felt pressure start to build up deep within his balls. He groaned again, somehow managing to resist the nearly overwhelming compulsion to grab the back of his girlfriend's head and yank it down to the root again.
Cordelia's hot tongue worked slowly and sensuously at the sensitive skin along the underside near the head. After a few more minutes of this, Xander felt his nuts clench again, and, just as his cock jerked in her mouth and he thought he was about to shoot –
– She pulled her head back completely and let him slip out from between her lips.
"Glahh!"
Xander's eyes opened, wide wild and startled, at the abrupt cessation of sensation along his glans. After a long moment, they managed to refocus somewhat and fastened on his girlfriend's face as his hardon bobbed and twitched in the night air in front of her.
"Hrmm," Cordelia said, eying his erection a bit dubiously. "Do you think I'm doing this properly, sir?"
"Uh... huhm a uh nuh?" Xander managed to blurt out, frantically attempting to focus on... well, anything, really.
Anything other than passing out from a near orgasm experience, that is...
Breathing heavily, Xander finally managed to evolve back to something resembling reasoning being status about the time that his nuts unclenched and dropped back down from his abdominal cavity. More or less.
"Uhhhh... ohh... God, yes," he said, or pretty much gasped. "Jussstttt right."
"Really?" Cordelia's eyes widened slightly as she gave him a maliciously innocent look over the bobbing head of his cock. "I wouldn't want to fail this part of the course, sir. Or, uh, leave you with a dirty gun or anything."
"Y-yu-you- you're trying to kill me, aren't you," Xander said, accusingly. He attempted a glare down at her, and was pretty sure he just managed a wild eyed boggle instead.
"Oh, no sir!" Cordelia said, her eyes widening further. "I wouldn't dream of it, sir!"
"Uh huh. Trying to kill me," Xander babbled. "This is revenge for that gushing thing earlier. Or for me making us both almost pass out."
"Me?!" Cordelia shook her head, her eyes still wide. The innocent effect was completely ruined by the decidedly malevolent giggle that burst out of her.
"You."
"Oh no," Cordelia said, giggling again. She was obviously having a hard time keeping a straight face here... "I just want to make absolutely sure your gun is properly cleaned."
"Oh, God. Me too," Xander said, reaching out with one hand to pull her head onto his cock again.
Cordelia yanked her head away from his grasp, shooting him a wounded looking glare. He yanked his hand back hastily.
Giving him a satisfied looking nod, Cordelia took hold of him with just her index finger and thumb circling the very base of his prick, and pulled him down slightly toward her mouth. Leaning forward slightly, she parted her lips and slowly ran her tongue along the first few inches of his shaft, circling the head at the upstroke.
Pulling away again, she batted her eyelashes and said, "Is there anything special I should be doing to make certain it's done right?"
"Oh dear sweet mamalooshin," Xanders aid, his head falling backwards. "Hell no – just go back to what you were doing before. Please... "
"Are you sure?"
She slid her tongue over the head again, eliciting another heartfelt groan from Xander.
"Oh yes.. please Cordy... finish me off," Xander managed to grunt out. Okay, more like whine out, but still...
Probably not the very best choice of words, considering who he was dealing with here...
"Hrrm. Oh – you are keeping watch for the enemy, aren't you sir?" Cordelia said, stopping just with her parted lips almost touching the head of his dick. It twitched, trying to strain upward to meet them.
Huh? Enemy?
Xander's eyes opened wide and he looked wildly around the area. What? Oh. Oh! That enemy.
Pshew. Nope. Grave undisturbed. No vamps in sight. No spectators, either. Or film crews.
"Uh huh. You bet," Xander said, hastily. "No enemy in sight, Private."
"Good," Cordelia said, nodding. Her slightly parted lips just brushed the tip of his cock with every bob of her head, getting and answering – and nearly painful twitch. "I wouldn't want to have anything sneak up on us while I'm... cleaning."
"Right. Because that would be of the bad. As in, not of the good. Because," Xander babbled, knowing he was babbling, and not giving a damn. "Sneaking, bad, no sneaking nee- guh!"
The sudden 'guh' came from Cordelia opening her mouth and dropping her head down and forward, taking him in all at one stroke, down to where her closing lips met her circling finger and thumb.
Xander felt the sensitive head of his cock hit the tightness at the back of Cordelia's mouth and throat, and his eyes rolled all the way back up into his head again.
"Hrmmm... " Cordelia said with her mouth closed around his shaft.
"Oh, sweet Pan and all of his mothering fauns," Xander choked out. His balls jerked up, but didn't quite clench and go off. Not just yet. That hrmmm sent vibrations though every single inch of him, radiating outward from his completely rigid cock.
One more of those and he'd be the first teenager on the moon without a spaceship.
Cordelia began working her hot, wet mouth in long spiraling motions out to the very tip of his erection, and back down again until the tip was buried in the tightness of her throat. On every down stroke, she'd swallow, constricting the head as her throat worked, ending it with another "Hrrmmm."
Xander figured it was maybe about three minutes of this – three minutes that felt like around three days – before his balls clenched up and his entire dick went even more rigid inside of her mouth. She drew her mouth back to the tip again, bobbing up and down for a long moment in a tight spiral around the glans, and he groaned.
A deep, nearly agonizing pulse started to build way, way down deep inside of his nuts.
"Oh, God... I think I'm gonna... oh God!"
Cordelia's mouth slid quickly all the way down again until her lips were against her circling fingers and the tip of his shaft was just inside of the tightness of her constricting throat. Xander felt himself jerk, once, twice, and again, and then a hot rush begin to build inside of his balls.
He felt the oddest sensation as Cordelia's lips spread in a grin around where they were wrapped around his hardon, and then an even odder one as the tip of an elegantly manicured fingernail slid into his asshole –
– Followed by the full length of the finger behind it, all the way up to the back knuckle.
They probably heard that hoarse male scream all the way to Santa Barbara, he figured later.
Xander's vision went black around the edges as the first thick gush of hot cum scorched its way up along the inside of his shaft. He was vaguely aware of Cordelia making choking sounds and gagging noises as a rope of nearly jet propelled jism hit the back of her throat, followed by another.
Only vaguely – his vision went completely black as that gush was followed by another. And another after that.
"Oh dear God and all the saints," Xander said, some time later.
Finally relaxing from a full body clench, he sighed heavily and opened his eyes to find his girlfriend sitting next to him, one leg curled up under her and half facing him. Cordelia was combing her hair out with her fingers and looking at him with a definite 'cat that swallowed the canary' expression.
Or maybe the cream, considering...
Her eyes widened comically as she saw his come open and fasten onto hers, and in her very best ditzy brunette voice she said, "It went off, sir!"
Xander couldn't help it.
He didn't stop laughing for a full fifteen minutes until he found himself rolling on the sidewalk under the bench with his arms wrapped around his aching stomach and his pants around his ankles.
Plunge deeper into the story with us – Next Chapter!
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