It had been three days since the night she sat on the curb with Nathan. It had been one of the worst and best nights of her life. Considering she was able to escape her father, she thought the night was a lot better that most nights. She allowed Nathan to walk her home about two houses away from her own. She pretended to look like she was going inside so Nathan wouldn't worry. As soon as he had driven away, she snuck around back and pulled her sleeping bag out of the shed and slept outside out of site. She considered sneaking back into the house, but it wasn't worth it, especially if he was still awake. She curled up into a ball and cried herself to sleep. When she awoke in the morning, her father's car was already gone. She went back inside and got to work. First she quickly ate some food, got dressed, and brushed her teeth. Then she pulled out a bottle of sleeping pills that she hid in her closet. She grabbed all the bottles of hard liquor and brought them to the kitchen. Haley crushed up the pills, silently hoping this would work. She put the pill powder into the bottled of liquor and screwed the caps back on. If he's too tired, he won't make any advances. She hadn't tried this technique before, but she prayed that it would work.
Breathing deeply, Haley decided to forget her life and just be in the moment while she was at school. She gave herself a personal break from her brain. She even allowed herself to smile slightly while walking down the hall to English. She knew her watch would tell her that she was running about five minutes late. When she got to the classroom she smiled at the teacher and scooted into her seat. There he was. Nathan Scott. He sat three desks over, near the window. She almost couldn't believe that he was the same person who she talked to last night. He was completely different at school. He had lifted his head along with everyone else when she entered late, and he didn't even realize it was her. Haley gazed over at him, starting to get angry. He either didn't really like her enough to acknowledge her existence, he was embarrassed of her, or he really was so self-centered that he paid no attention to anyone else. All of the above options, she decided, were in a lose-lose situation. Sighing, she pulled out her text book and waited for class to be over. She kept staring at him until the bell rang, and their teacher dismissed the class. She scurried out of the classroom, but bumped into someone along the way. Her binder flew open and all of her loose papers scattered across the floor. She looked up and saw Nathan. Her heart skipped a beat.
"Oh sorry," he said not bothering to stop or look at who he had just bumped into. She watched him stride of into the distance.
"Ughh," she muttered to herself, trying to pick up her papers. She saw a hand reach down to help her. This took her off guard. "Why are you helping me?" She asked in a somewhat surprised tone. They both stood and the boy handed her a few papers.
"I'm sorry?"
"Never mind, thanks for helping."
"Not a problem, I'm Aaron by the way.
"Hi, I'm..."
"Haley," he said looking at a paper of hers.
"Yup, that's me."
"Well Haley, can I ask you something?"
"Sure, I guess."
"Well I'm new, and I was kind of looking for someone to show me around school..."
"Say no more...look Aaron you seem really nice, but you don't want to be seen talking to me for an extended period of time."
"Wait...what?"
"It's not you it's me. I'm diseased."
"Is it serious?" He asked jokingly.
"Yes, very. It's this new social disease called being unpopular. I don't recommend it. Besides, you're new and I wouldn't want to ruin your chances of fitting in." Haley turned to walk away when Aaron put his hand gently on her shoulder. Haley flinched, and swirled around.
"Please, don't touch me."
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean..."
"Look I'll show you around. Just don't blame me when people start ignoring you and people start harassing you. Now are you sure you want to be seen with me?"
"Yes."
"Okay then." She started walking down the hall, and motioned for him to follow.
"Welcome to Tree Hill High. Do you have anything specific you want to know?"
"Actually, yeah. Where's the gym?" Haley stopped abruptly.
"It's over on the right. Why?"
"I want to try out for the basketball team. I played at my old school."
"Aaron, it was really great meeting you, I mean really. But if you want to play basketball, you will seriously forget ever meeting me." Haley hurried away and ducked into the girl's bathroom before Aaron could say anything.
Later that evening
Haley James sat on her porch. The porch was a safe place for her because her father wouldn't dare make a scene outside in front of the neighbors. She noticed that she was crying. Hastily she removed the tears from her face with the back of her hand. She forced a smile.
"Happy to see me?" Nathan peeked his head out of the shadows. Haley was glad for his discreetness, but royally pissed off at his behavior towards her at school.
"Nathan, you go to Tree Hill High, right?"
"Yes."
"I don't get it."
"Don't get what?
"Who you are."
"Shouldn't I be asking you the same question cryptico?"
"Nathan Scott, open your eyes."
"They are open."
"You are such a jerk do you know that?"
"Whoaaa...calm down Haley. I wasn't the one doing all the lying."
"Don't you dare shove that in my face. You are an arrogant ass. I can't believe I ever fooled myself into thinking I liked you like that."
"Wait, you like me?"
"Past tense, they teach that in English." Haley was so angry that she stood up to go inside, but then realized what was waiting for her if she went back in. So she sat back down. Nathan still stood there staring at her. "Could you leave?"
"Why? This is sort of like public property. Why don't you just go back into your house like usual instead of facing what's going on between us?"
"Fuck you." Haley stood up and slapped him against his face. HARD. So much so that he actually winced and took a step back. "You don't know a fucking thing about me. I can't believe I almost opened up to you." She turned around and retreated into her house. She got to the door when she noticed her father still up in the living room. She could barely make out his figure through the sheer curtained window, but he was still up, and she didn't know why. The sleeping pills should have worked...she put them in all of his...well of course tonight he would chose to drink beer instead of the hard stuff. She ruined whatever she had with Nathan, and she was so upset with everything. Her breathing started to quicken, she could feel herself hyperventilating. She had no options. Nathan had stepped onto the porch and when Haley turned around, she stood face to face with him. "I'm so sorry for hitting you," she breathed.
"Haley? Are you okay? Let's get you inside,"
"No!" She barely squeaked it out, but she firmly told him no.
"I don't know what to do, tell me what to do!" Before she could answer, she fell to the porch with a loud thump.
"Haley?! Haley?!"
The next morning Haley woke up and rubbed her head. Everything hurt. She realized that she wasn't in her own bed. Looking down at her wrists, she realized where she was. She started crying but the tears didn't come. She let out painful heart wrenching dry sobs. She quickly got out of his bed and ran to her bathroom. Turning the water to scalding hot, she sat in the bathtub, her knees to her chin and let the water heal her. She laid her head in her lap and rocked back and forth like a lost child. After a while she reached for soap. Systematically she scrubbed and scoured every part of her body. The scalding water combined with the rough scrubbing hurt her skin. Next she took the shampoo and poured it on her head. She repeated the shampoo process five times. When the water had washed away the last drop of soap, she turned the faucets off. Still afraid to move, she huddled in the bathtub until she couldn't bear it anymore. Slowly she stepped out of the tub. She pulled her hair back into an elastic and then dried herself off. She went to her bedroom and put on a dull pair of sweats and a dark hoodie. She didn't care that it was 80 degrees outside, all she knew was that she needed to be covered. She pulled out white gauze that she kept inside her desk. She tenderly wrapped her wrists in the fabric, and as a double precaution, she pulled down her sleeves.
Despite everything Haley did decide to go to school. She had missed calculus, and would be late for English, but it was, in her mind better than not going at all. She walked to school as usual, but instead of listening to her thoughts, she turned up her ipod and listened to her music. When she got to school, she headed straight for English. She was fifteen minutes late. Quietly entering the classroom, she hoped that the teacher wouldn't pay attention but of course she did.
"Haley James. It's nice of you to join us. I'm sorry but is there something better going on in your life that takes precedent over my class?" All the students looked up at her. She stared them back, and that's when she caught Nathan's dumbfounded face in her sight.
"No, I'm sorry. It won't happen again."
"Let's see to that. Now please take your seat." Haley nodded and sat in her corner. She knew Nathan was staring at her, but she refused to look back. She took dutiful notes, and even answered a question, just to get back on the teacher's good side. She saw a folded piece of paper land on her desk. She unfolded it and was surprised to see who it's sender was.
Hey...aren't you hot? It's like 100 degrees lol
-Aaron
Haley realized she would have to call upon her intellect and lie about her life once again.
Haha, you would think right? Actually my core
Body temp runs like five degrees cooler.
p.s. did you make the team?
She wanted to avert his attention from the fact that she was a freak. When the teacher turned her back to the class to write on the whiteboard, she tossed it to the next desk where Aaron smiled and received her note. A few seconds later, the same piece of paper landed back on her desk.
I totally made the team. Not in a star player sense, but
I did make varsity which counts for something.
I have reached the conclusion that
I do not care about your disease and would
very much like to have someone to sit with
at lunch. You in? And if you say no,
I'll be forced to do something outrageous.
-A
Haley contemplated the lunch offer. She really didn't have any time for new friends, which was probably a lie. The truth was that she didn't want to let anyone else in. However it was just lunch and he seemed desperate for a friend.
Well I can't have you doing anything outrageous...
I have third lunch block, meet me outside and the
Picnic tables
p.s. don't blame me if you catch it lol
She smiled and sent the paper back to him. Right then the class bell rang and everyone stood to leave.
"Haley, where is room B323?" Aaron asked.
"Take a right, then a left when you reach the gym, and it's on the third floor."
"Okay I gotta jet, but I'll see you at lunch!" Aaron darted out of the room to get to his next class.
Haley gathered her stuff, and walked out of the classroom and straight into Nathan, who did not look very happy.
"Hi," she said stiffly. No response. Haley turned to walk away, but Nathan stopped her.
"Haley, I don't know what to say. I just don't know..."
"You don't need to say anything. Actions speak much louder than words Scott."
"Haley, I'm sorry."
"Please don't. You can't change who you are, so don't try."
"Give me a chance. I really like you."
"So much that you didn't even notice me...for how many years? You bumped into me like a day ago! You didn't even acknowledge me. I see you everyday, and after what happened this summer, I don't know...I guess I just expected more."
"Look. I'm really sorry. Can't you forgive me? What if we start fresh?"
Haley started to walk away but Nathan jumped in front of her. "Will you at lease tell me if you're alright?" Haley stared at him dumbfounded.
"What are you talking about?"
"Last night...with the fainting. Your dad came out to the porch...but don't worry, I totally covered. I made up some crap about school and you not feeling well earlier, so I wanted to see if you were okay. He was really nice about it. He helped you inside. I just wanted to know if that your okay."
"I can't believe...I...no. I'm not okay Nathan. I'm never going to be okay." She reached her hands up to scrunch her hair in frustration and Nathan noticed the fresh bandages on her wrists.
"Are you cutting still?"
"What?!" He pointed to her wrists.
"It's none of your business. Just leave me alone." Haley strode off down the hall, leaving Nathan staring behind her.
Later that afternoon, Haley went to meet Aaron for lunch. She wasn't surprised to see him at a table already. She plopped down across from him and smiled slightly.
"Hi."
"Hi back Haley. To be honest I thought I would be dining alone."
"Well you almost did, but then I remembered the whole outrageous thing...and I tend to like quiet...so this seemed like the more reasonable decision." Aaron beamed at Haley, and then resumed eating his lunch.
"So how are things?"
"Things?"
"I dunno, school...life?"
"Umm..."
"What no answer? Okay, let's change the topic. Do you like unicorns?"
Haley smiled at him and said,
"Nope not at all...they give me the wiggins...along with clowns, and brooms."
"Brooms? Brooms give you the creeps?"
"Yes they do." Aaron nodded and smiled.
"Hey, where's your lunch? You're not eating."
Haley hadn't noticed the lack of food on her side of the table. Just then her tummy began to grumble.
"I guess I forgot to make lunch today."
"Here, I have too much anyway," he said thrusting some of his lunch at her. Haley thanked him and began to munch on a carrot stick. "So this school is really clicky. I mean I know all schools have cliques, but this school seems heinously clicky."
"Welcome to Tree Hill my friend."
After school, Haley started the walk home. Her father never came home before 5:30, so she liked to use that time productively.
"Haley! Wait up!" She recognized the voice, and kept walking. Nathan started jogging to catch up to her. "Hey, I shouted to you, didn't you hear me?"
"Yeah, I heard." Haley kept walking.
"Haley, please...just give me one minute." Haley paused and turned back.
"Alright."
"Alright?"
"Alright, you've got one minute."
"Great. Thanks. Okay here I go making a fool of myself again, probably only to be rejected, but I'm going to try one last time. You said no to dinner a couple of times. I know you lied, and I know I screwed up majorly by being a self centered asshole who sees no one but himself at school. I get the whole open your eyes thing now, and I wish I could go back and open my eyes. I think of all that wasted time that I didn't see you and I didn't talk to you, and I don't like it. So please go out with me..."
"Nathan..."
"No wait. Before you say no, I was thinking breakfast. We could both go to breakfast someday this week? Friday morning? We could wake up early and go get breakfast." Haley didn't say anything. She cast her eyes downward toward the sidewalk. Nathan's shoulders dropped.
"It's okay, I understand...I guess I'll see you around." He turned around and headed back to the school."
"Nathan, wait." He stopped quickly and faced her.
"6:30...Friday morning...I think we could do that." Nathan beamed at her.
"Sweet. See you then!" He jogged back to school, and Haley went home.
When Haley got home, her father was already there.
"Hey baby-doll," He father whispered into her ear.
"Dad!? I mean, dad...what are you doing home?"
"I need to pack; I'm going on a business meeting. I need to take some new clients on. There's a whole seminar and such. I'll be gone for a week and a half."
"Oh," Haley replied.
"I know baby, I know. But daddy will call every night, so you won't be lonely." Haley couldn't believe her luck. A whole week without having to worry about her father? "Hey baby, run along upstairs and start packing for me would ya?" Haley nodded and went up stairs.
She had almost finished packing when she heard her father come up behind her. He reached around her chest and started fondling her breasts. Haley clenched the clothes she was packing tightly in anger. She gently tried to pull away, but her father gripper her more firmly.
"Now now...none of that."
"Dad, I'm still packing...your flight..." He put his hand over her mouth and reached down to unbutton her pants. Haley pulled free and looked at him. "Dad...daddy...please. I still hurt really bad from last night."
"You weren't even conscious last night when I fucked you!"
"I know, I know..." she said softly trying to calm him. "It's just that it still really really hurts. She lifted her shirt a bit to show him the bruises on her waist.
"I guess I was a little rough last night," he chuckled. "Well alright, I don't want to hurt my baby-doll, so just suck me off and we'll call it even." Haley nodded somberly in agreement. It's better than the alternative. It's better then him being inside you. It's better, it's better... Haley repeated this mantra in her mind over and over until her father had his release. After he was finished he pulled up his pants and finished packing. Haley sat on the carpet leaning up against his bed, trying to hold it together until he left. He hated it when she cried after. Anything that made him feel a little bit of guilt or remorse caused him to get violent. She had scars of his violence all over her. If she left to go clean herself while he was still awake, he would beat her. In his eyes there was no reason for her to wash, because they hadn't done anything dirty.
"You gonna miss me baby?" Haley nodded.
"Of course daddy."
"That's my girl," he said softly. They both heard the taxi honk its horn below. "Alright baby, I'll see you in nine days." He bounded down the stairs and outside into the taxi. Haley immediately went to the bathroom, stuck her finger down her throat and purged him from her body. Then she took a shower, and followed her habitual routine.
The next day, Haley woke up in her own warm bed with a big smile on her face. She made herself breakfast and although she wore dark wash jeans as usual, she reached over into the very far left side of her closet and pulled out a pink tee. However upon looking in the mirror, she realized that the shirt didn't necessarily go with her dark black hair. Reaching back into the closet she pulled out a green long sleeved shirt. Then she put on her mother's cross and kissed it. Although it was a very subtle change in clothing, the look was very dramatic. Haley couldn't help but smile. This was exactly what she needed. A little freedom and a little color. She walked to school as usual, but today she arrived early. She went to her locker and found Nathan leaning against it. When he saw her he couldn't help but smile. Haley couldn't resist a little smirk herself.
"Hi," she said, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.
"Hi back good looking."
"So, what's up?"
"Well I asked this incredible girl the other day to breakfast and she said yes. I just wanted to make sure that I wasn't dreaming it all up."
"Nope, we are still on."
"Great, because I have this amazing place that you'll love." He started to walk away when Haley asked,
"Do you have practice after school?"
"No, varsity was early morning today. Why?"
"Umm...do you want to walk me home from school? Or we could hang out or something." Nathan smiled brightly.
"That would be great! I'll meet you at your locker after last period." Haley nodded in approval.
She watched Nathan walk away, and she smiled to herself. Thud. She watched as her binder was pushed to the ground by an unknown hand. Her loose papers flew everywhere.
"What the crap!" Haley said angrily.
"Oops?"
"Brooke Davis, what is your problem?"
"You are...freak." She sneered.
"You and me...I get the whole we aren't friends anymore, but don't be a bitch." Brooked gave her a sarcastic smile and walked away with her group of friends. Haley bent down to gather up her papers.
"Why is it that I always find you on the ground picking up papers?" A familiar voice asked stooping down to help.
"Well...obviously, so you will come and rescue them."
"Ah yes, that would be true. Aaron Ansen, defender of paper products that cannot defend themselves."
"Try saying that three times fast."
"Aaron Ansen defender of..."
"I was just kidding," Haley smiled. The two of them finished picking up her papers.
"You might consider switching to notebook," Aaron remarked casually.
"Well...You might consider switching...your face!" Aaron started laughing.
"Oh my God! I haven't hear a 'your face' joke in such a long time. Classic."
"Well I do try to exceed the expectations of our forefathers."
"Haley James?"
"Yes, Mr. Ansen?"
"I do believe that we are flirting."
"I think you're right. But...no...no...no,no."
"No...we aren't flirting, or no to the flirting."
"Um both? No the second. See there's this guy..."
"Say no more, flirting comment retracted. I would definitely settle on being your friend."
"Really? Good, because to be quite honest...I could really use a friend." Haley responded timidly.
"You? Come on, I'm the new one you know."
"Yeah yeah...come on, let's get to class Mr. I need a friend."
"Oh Haley...you and you wit..."
TBC...I hope you guys liked the update!! Please review! Reviews are like top coat over shiny nail polish...lol! I have some ideas on where I want this story to go, but I'd love to hear from you guys what you like what you want to see etc. Thanks again!