July 18th update: Read the new Prologue in chapter 1 in you haven't - NOW. I highly recommend rereading the edits in Chapter 1 and 2.

Author Note: I am SO sorry for any person reading this story for my lack of updates. I feel like I let you down but most importantly because I hate to break a promise. Though, I do have an explaination (a very pathetic one but one nonetheless) the laptop with my plot outline and summary of the story was acting.. argh.. let's just say douchey. The files on it were curropted and unreadable so I couldn't get into and I had no idea where I was supposed and not supposed to go to. I didn't even remember what the ending the ending to my own story was. It finally got fixed but I still procastinated (bad habit that I haven't gotten over). School was kicking my arsch and graduation was stressing me out. I'm going to camp July 19th. So the next 2 weeks )or 1 week I won't be able to update it again. I AM working on it so don't worry. I changed the ending (might be a sequel!)

P.S For the special person that reminded me of the importance of this story, I have something I think is kinda special for you in an upcoming chapter!

**** Blurry by Puddle of Mudd****

The Root Of All Evil

Chapter 4 : Blurry

I gently sigh as the heat rises up into skin. It wraps my body in a warm embrace as I slip lower into the water. Every insecurity and thought vanishes in a matter of seconds. It's more than a cleansing but a inner diluting as well. The strange teal hued smoky surroundings of the spring is probably the most wonderful thing that could have happened to me. I think back to what happened in that field and I shutter lighty at one of the worst things. I can still feel his hands exploring me. His callused hands were gentle and soft yes but, I wasn't prepared for those hands to touch in some of my most private of places.

The color rises up into my cheeks as I blush at the sudden thought. If any peeping Tom's were suddenly looking I could blame it on the steam. Well, I shouldn't have to explain myself to them for they are the ones invading my privacy. I've never been more grateful for having the gift of thoughts. Unless you were a mind reader, no one can invade my thoughts. Never did I imagine that I also would be here thinking of such things. My stomach knots and curls inwardly in disgust.

How could I have ever possibly enjoyed that? I'm damaged...because now I might never enjoy it... no matter who I'm with. I'm ruined.

Wicked laughter erupts from the back of someone's throat. The sound grows louder and louder as if coming from behind. I sink into the water further until my nose is grazing the rippling surface. My eyes dart around looking for any intruders. The night is young but there was no way of knowing if someone or something was lurking. The only thing that I stumbled upon was an old man slowly trudging down a dirt road to a neighboring westward village. He seemed innocent and seemingly vulnerable. There was no need of hesistation before I stripped down and settled here (aside from the occasional peeping Tom that I was previously concerned with). Tremors pass through my body. Steam rises at the contact of my rapid breathing.

Oh please, you so obviously enjoyed yourself.

I frozenly stay afloat, unable to move. I'm completely unaware of where the voice is being emitted from. "Wh-Who's there?" Did I say it? I could have thought it instead and wouldn't have know the difference between my soft whisper to the water. I lift my head above the water for better projection.

"I know your there! You need to leave!"My efforts of trying to sound firm continue to fail as each word becomes higher from the emense amount of constriction forming in my throat.

Can't you just accept it? Why are fighting when there is nothing to go against?

The voice is ominous, dark, and softly feminine, but not soft enough to not sound as menacing as it does. "I'm not fighting anything!"

How very bold of you to think so. I, on the other hand, know different. Your mouth may not have been truthfull but..

She clicks her tongue into a tsk and continues in a childlike sing-song voice.

….. an image speaks a thousand words.

The water quivers and ripples as I rise and search frantically for my unwelcomed guest. mj

"Who are you? What are you talking about?" My voice cracks – my neck tenses farther.

Just like that nameless expressions as he took your innocence. The sighs and looks of relief and contempt as -

"Stop! Just stop! You don't know what you are saying!"

The voice chickles lightly in amusment and resumes to talk in a sing-song. You let him take you.

Harder and harder his body went. Your hips leaped and begged for more. He did as you pleaseeeed...

The evidence of a smirk played on their lips and crept through their voice.

"No," I mumble. My hand clutches my dripping locks. The burn of the memory engraved and scarred into my head rekindles and comes to life all over again. I think maybe if I squeeze tight enough it'll all go away. It might just go away if I can douse the raging fire.

It wasn't enough for you my dear. Hmph, not enough at all. Holding your very thighs apart , fingers seeping into your hips, grind-

Anger unleashes through me. My hands press against my head harder trying to block out anything and everything. Nothing works. The voice continues growing louder with each detail. My fingers tense and grab onto my raven tassles, digging into the roots and scalp. My mouth twitches in fury as I refuse to take this abuse any longer. I scream. I scream until the lungs inside me begin to burn and convulse, every contraction is unforgiving. I don't know whether the woman has silence Nonetheless, I continue to screech. I'm too scared to stop and hear that voice again.

Rustling bushes break through my loud pleas and I end my wanton scream with a tiny squeek. Quickly, I turn around and stare at the figure gaping at my bare form hardly concealed from the water. Shock devours my control and I freeze as the water grazes my navel.

W-w-why is he just gawking like that?

With a slight wimper of rage and embarrasement, I plunge into the steaming liquid once more. The crimson flush in my face is the only revealed. Miroku shuffles with his feet and snaps his jaw with an audible snap.

"I heard ," he clears his throat in a ploy to remain calm, " I heard screaming and thought-"

"I'm fine."

My sharp interruption only increases the akward stillness. The unwelcomed woman couldn't have possible made her exit without breaking the tension in the night air. For this, I assume she must have left during my hysterics. Still, the air remains the same until Miroku decides to cut through by changing the conversation to make his escape.

"Beautiful night, warm bath – seems I should take my leave and let you proceed." He swiftly turns away to head back.

I don't have the gall to say it to his face so I take the oppurtunity that his back is turned to me."Thank you."

Miroku ears perk at the low mumble and he turns his head slightly back in direction. Though, he doesn't fully look in fear that I might appear to be, well, indecent. "For what?", he carefully questions.

I study the pebble under my right foot and gently stroke it under the water. "Thank you for everything. You've done so much lately. I... I shouldn't have overreacted when you came." I shake my head lightly and eye my floatly locks. "It was rude of me."

The tension in his shoulders drops at his deep sigh. "What am I going to do?"

What is he talking about?

My silent question lingers in the air. I continue to hold my gaze at the pebble.

"If there is something wrong Sango you need to tell me. All of this... it's.. it's making me sick."

Th sadness and slight irration in his voice brings me to a cowarding state. My erratic behavior and sudden outburst - things like this aren't only affecting me. Little things (the glances, smirks, rear-end fondling) all of those little things had created such a drastic effect on me. Now, I see how the tables have turned. I never stopped to think these past fews day to consider his own feelings. Miroku must feel left in the dark, abandon – helpless. He must feel helpless in his own effort to help me.

Selfish

The pain sweeps through my brain. I let out a sharp gasp at the sudden feeling. My hands return their clutch at my skull. Make it stop... please.

"Argh, just stop!" The palms of my hands apply force to my ever throbbing head.

Miroko had already turned around at the sound of my gasp. Pain gleams through is eyes as he watches my haunting pleas. No matter how much I know he wants to, it's impossible for him to help. He doesn't have the power to take it all away. His efforts will be useless because in some way, under another circumstance the whole ordeal will eventually come back and be shoved in my face. I won't let him. He'll hurt worse.

He steps forward and sends an outreached hand the edge of the spring. "Why," his voice trembles, "why won't you let me help you?"

I wince at the pain and loud sound waves slamming into my head. I look up and see what appears to be a small drop of liquid trailing down his cheek and slowly curving down his chin.

He misunderstood me. These upcoming thoughts and emotions of regret and sorrow toward Miroku rack my brain as extra waves to the already storming tsunami of burning embers. It's a pain so undescribable that I myself can't comprehend. I ignore the tears pouring from my eyes and involuntarily focus in on the pain in my head. My cracked lips begin to sting as the salty liquid trails onto them. I've felt the water rippling around but couldn't care less that Miroku was trugding in the water closer to me sobbing and begging. I can't listen him to repeat over and over how ghostly I've been.

My hands begin to make slow circular patterns on my skull to possibly end this episode. Miroku's ramblings begin to reach my ringing ears as a sign that it might be working.

"No matter how much you scream Sango I'm not going anywhere!" Then at that very moment I hear something else. A blood curling sound so awful that I didn't recognize as my own voice. Suddenly, I feel the weight of wet cloth wrap around me. My voices dies out and I slowly close my stone like lips. Never stopping the ministrations upon my cranium, I hesitantly look up through a blurry haze and catch my breath as I stare into violet storm cloud gray eyes. I slowly bring my hands down. After find that my head spell is over I clutch at Miroku's body not giving a damn of my obscenity and whoever may be watching. I hold on for his support and willingness. He can sense and knows of the insettling nature harboring inside me. He's so aware that I don't even have to choke out,

"Something far worse is wrong with me and..."

...she doesn't know what it is.

End Chapter Notes: Please inform me of any grammar or spelling mistakes. Reviews are welcomed if you have time.