A few weeks had passed since I started training with Adam. He was still making me do the basic shit that I hated and I swear he was doing all of it to torture me. I had learned easily that he liked to push my buttons and try and get me angry. I finally had a day off to myself, something I like to call a mental health day. I'm sure you've all heard it before and have even taken one for yourself at some point. The day where you get all those little demons in your head taken care of, or so you'd like to think they're taken care of, and that was what my day would consist of.
I woke up to the sound of the daily traffic slowly progressing past my small apartment. As I climbed out of the bed and opened the door, taking a look around the newly holiday decorated apartment, I noticed, once again, there was no sign of my father anywhere. He'd been doing this a lot more often now. He'd come home in afternoons, just before I'd get home so he'd make me think he was here all day, cause apparently to my father, I'm fucking dumb. One of us would make dinner, chat about our day and then he'd go out for a night on the town with some new chick as if he were twenty again. Talk about annoying.
Other than my father royally pissing me off, I was glad that I was still in the clear with Adam. We hadn't talked much about my life or his since the first day he asked me, and I was more than completely okay with it. I'd rather just keep it to kicking each other's asses in the ring. Oh, and also kicking the blonde bimbo's ass as well, which I tended to do a lot.
You're so modest, Harley Jane.
I smirked to myself at my own thoughts, which, I'll admit again, is pretty crazy, and I sat on the faux suede couch, pulling my long legs up onto it. I reached over to grab the remote and turned on the television, flipping through the channels, something I hadn't done in awhile. Settling on a random cooking show, I sighed and leaned back against the softness of the couch, lifting my fingers to press on the bruises that had settled on my knees from the constant falling, obviously something I'd soon have to get used to.
I lifted my head to check the clock, it only reading ten-forty five. He'd try making his way home in an hour or so, thinking I'd be training. I pushed my thoughts aside and focused on the food network. Some chick was making Christmas tree cookies and they looked pretty good.
"I'm gonna have to try that one day.." I murmured aloud, tilting my head as I watched more closely.
Actually, scratch that. I hate holidays and anything to do with them. The best part were the lights because they were cute and colorful. But to me holidays, unlike my trainer, did not reek of awesomeness.
I grabbed the remote and began flipping through the channels once more to avoid the cookies and laid back against the suede. After just a few minutes, I threw the remote aside in frustration. Literally, nothing was on. I had no want to watch Top Chef, Spongebob, Charmed, and I especially didn't want to watch Jersey Shore. Fuck that.
"Staying home sucks." I muttered aloud, placing my hand on the couch and pushing myself back up. I took a look around the white walls of the small apartment and let out a bored sigh. What the hell am I going to do all day? Well, until my dad comes home at least.
"Maybe I could clean." I spoke aloud to myself, tilting my head and looking around the apartment. Boxes from my dad decorating were all over the place.
Probably because he's too busy out with girls to even care about the mess.
I rolled my eyes at my own thoughts, knowing it was most-likely true. I got up off the couch and walked over to the box, closing each flap before lifting it and carrying it towards the small closet across from my room that we had pushed all the boxes we were too lazy to unpack in. I piled the box right on top of the 'old pictures' box, a box I don't even know why we took with us. I sighed and shut the folding door and opened up the door to my room, collecting all the clothes that were sprawled across the floor that had been laying there for the past week and a half. Most of them were the clothes I had trained in and I was just too lazy to do anything with them. I'd come home and literally just throw my clothes wherever and then take a cold shower and then sleep.
I sighed and gathered the clothes in my arms and walked out of my room, going to the dryer that was right beside my father's room. I skillfully opened the folding door without dropping a single article of clothing and I tossed every piece into the washer and probably poured a little too much soap into the wash machine.
Oh well.
I shrugged and blew my hair from my face and walked into the kitchen, turning on the kitchen sink and starting to clean the dishes that had been sitting in the sink probably just as long as my clothes had been sitting in my room. I could probably say my dad hadn't done anything since unpacking the apartment and decorating for Christmas. I hummed a song to myself as I cleansed the dishes of crumbs, soda, and dirt.
Just as I turned the water off, the front door closed and I looked up to see non other than my dad walking in, shrugging his jacket off his shoulders. I peered my head up to the clock and it only read eleven-oh-seven. He was home a lot sooner than I had expected.
"Hey, dad." I called out, my voice seeming probably harsh. I noticed his body flinch in surprise, and he looked over towards me. He definitely wasn't expecting me to be home.
"Harley Jane, I wasn't expecting you home." He covered with a laugh.
Yup, I was right.
"I didn't have training today. I would've told you, but when I got home yesterday, you weren't here, of course." I told him with a shrug. I heard his sigh and I walked out of the small kitchen and I leaned against the wall that separated the dining room and the kitchen and I looked towards him.
"Harley, are we going to start this already?" He questioned exasperatingly, hanging his jacket up on the festive hooks he had put up.
"Start what, Dad? Is your daughter not allowed to be annoyed that her father is going out more and getting more one night stands than she is, and he's 43 years old?" I spat, my voice getting increasingly higher.
"I'm only here for you, Harley. I don't have to be nor do I want to be by your side twenty-four seven, but I am because I know you want me to be!" He shouted back to me.
Ouch. That stung a bit.
My head dropped and I didn't utter another word. The worst part about it was that I knew he was right.
"Harley.." He started, his voice softer and more sympathetic, "I'm sorry, Harley Jane. I'm trying here, I really am. It's just that ever since your mother left, I can't pull it back together."
My head snapped up, "Stop, Dad. I'm not talking about her." I spoke quickly, shaking my head.
"Harley, you're going to have to talk about it some day."
"No, I won't! I don't have to nor do I want to! She means absolutely nothing to me and she never will be anything more than just a name." I continued, my voice loud as I stole his previous words. I could feel the sensation of crying coming on and I blinked my eyes.
You're not crying over her, Harley. Stop.
"Harley, you can't hate her forever. We both made mistakes.." He kept trying, his voice getting softer and softer with each sentence.
"Mistakes are made for learning purposes. She didn't learn a single fucking thing the day she walked out on her family besides that running can get her away from her problems." I noted, my hands fumbling to find a piece of hair to play with.
"Harley," My dad started to talk again and I cut him off with a quick, 'Stop.'
I shook my head and walked towards the front door, grabbing the jacket off the hook and sliding it on.
"Where are you going?" He sighed, shaking his head.
"For some fresh air." I murmured, "And you can tell the whore waiting in your car that she can come in." I added, pulling open the front door and walking outside.
The jacket wasn't really necessary since the weather in Tampa was still in the sixties, but my anxiety was going which would usually make me freezing and shake with no end. I closed my eyes tightly as I walked down the sidewalk, shoving my hands in the peacoat's pockets, shaking my head. I blame Adam, for not holding a training session today.
I was hoping my walk would clear my head, but it was doing the complete opposite. I couldn't stop thinking about the day my mother left my dad and I. I couldn't stop thinking about the promise she made me but never upheld. My chest tightened with anxiety and I couldn't wait to get back in the ring tomorrow and kick the shit out of Adam or blondie. This wasn't the mental health day I was looking forward to. It was the exact opposite, actually.
'"Mommy! Mommy, where are you going?!" Little Harley Jane chased after her mother, tears falling from her eyes like a waterfall and staining her rosy cheeks that had reminded her father so much of her mother.
"Mommy's just going out for a bit, sweetie. She'll be home later. I promise." Harley clung onto her mother's leg, knowing what came from her mother's lips were just lies.
"Avery, you don't have to do this. We can fix things, I'll change." Harley's father – James – pleaded with his wife, who was slipping out of his hands.
"No, James, we can't fix this. He gives me everything I've ever needed. We rushed into our marriage too fast and then we had Harley thinking it'd fix things, but it made it worse. We aren't made for each other like we used to believe so long ago." She explained to her husband.
Harley barely understood what was going on, only being the young age of five. All she could comprehend was that her mother was leaving and she knew it was different than her just going to the store. She screamed for her mother as she went closer to the door, dragging her suitcase behind her.
"Harley, mommy will see you again soon. I promise. Stop crying, beautiful." She pleaded with her daughter as she kneeled down and wrapped her petite arms around her daughters small body, hugging her closely. Harley clung on for dear life, not wanting the woman she loved so much to leave her life.
"Mommy, please don't go." Harley whispered, holding onto the shirt her mother was wearing.
"Avery, please.." Her father tried, stepping forward to try and save his family from falling apart, but Avery only stood up to show she was going to have it her way.
"I have to go." She whispered, blinking the tears back as she tried setting Harley back down, "If you really loved my, you'd let me go." She told her husband who would soon be her ex.
James only knew that was the truth. He walked forward, grabbing onto his daughters sides and pulling her away from her mother. Harley cried louder and flailed her arms around, trying to get away from her father and get back to her mother.
"Mommy, no!" She cried as her mother walked out of the front door. She only peeked inside to utter the last words to her daughter, "I love you, Harley Jane." And after that, she was gone. And so was everything Harley knew as a family.
new chapter! thank you to sekhmet49 and rated-r-edgehead for their advice! i tried taking it into account in this chapter which is why it took me longer to publish. i'm really hoping you guys like it! i wanted to give you a little insight into harley's life and part of the reason she can be so distant. so thank you guys once again for you reviews/favs and all! and happy holidays! keep reading and reviewing! and check out my randy orton story if you're a fan and tell me what you guys think! love you all MUAH - kbye.