TWILIGHT & ALL IT'S CHARACTERS ARE OWNED BY MS. MEYERS. I NEED MORE COFFEE.

BELLA

For the rest of the day, I hid behind my hair. I spoke to no one; Happy Bella was in the witness protection program. No one tried to speak to me either. I think they knew to just stay away. I kept thinking about my rotten lab partner. I pictured his eyes, and how much they resembled Billy's. Not by color or shape, but the emotion. The absolute hatred.

I pulled into the driveway not really remembering the drive home. My dad pulled in behind me. I wondered briefly if he'd been following me. Not like it mattered, where was I going to go? To another part of the forest, or maybe that wooded area beyond the forest, all there was around her was fucking forest. Gotta love Washington. We both went inside, we didn't talk to each other, but that was normal. We generally used the time between getting home and dinner to wind down from our day. Both of us rather enjoyed the silence. I made good on the silent promise I made to fix Charlie's favorite dinner and got started on the Chicken Alfredo, with mushrooms and carrots. In the silence of our after school/after work wind-down I couldn't stop thinking about those piercing green eyes. I kept seeing them in front of me. Every time l let my mind look at them they kept morphing into fatherly dark brown eyes…Billy's eyes…that hated the very essence of me. Every time they changed it felt like my body was in a vise, the tears begging to come to the surface. I had to keep them at bay. Charlie was in the other room, surely would have noticed his mentally unstable daughter blubbering over pan of Alfredo sauce. I had regained some composure by the time we sat down to eat; just enough so Happy Bella could come out of hiding, for a while.

"So… Jessica Stanley, huh?" Charlie wore an expression that was a mixture of confusion and humor maybe a little chagrin.

"Yeah. It'll make mom happy." He stopped eating and studied me for a minute.

"What about you Bella? Will it make you happy?" I looked up and meet him eye to eye. "I can tell Renee anything, you know." This shocked me, first because I couldn't conceive him lying to my mom. Secondly because I couldn't believe he said something so open. Actually wanting to know my feelings. I didn't know how to respond.

"No, Dad, it's ok. This is what I moved here to do, normal teenage stuff. Maybe she'll be different if we're away from school, and on a mission, and she gets to spend money….. and it's just us." I sounded like I was trying to convince myself as much as I was my father. It was a lie. He knew it better than I did. He had known her since she was a little girl.

"Alright. Renee should be calling soon. You should tell her; maybe she'll give you a few days break." He went back to eating, and I just nodded.

Charlie was right, mom called as soon as I cleared the table. She was excited about my plans with Jessica. We didn't talk long. I told her I had homework, which was technically true so we cut our conversation short. She spoke to dad for a few minutes, probably confirming everything I told her. While I was washing the dishes the eyes appeared before me again and I dropped a glass. It hit the floor and shattered. Charlie came rushing in.

"Bella! What happened?" He bent down to help me pick up the pieces.

"My hands were soapy, it just slipped. I'm sorry Dad" My voice was shaking. I was shaking.

"It's ok, it's just a glass. Are you ok? Did you cut yourself?" He grabbed both of my hands and turned them over palm up surveying my arm elbow to wrist, pausing slightly at my scars.

"No…I'm fine"

"Ok, I'll talk care of this. Why don't you go upstairs and start your homework."

"I can clean it." I reached for the broom and dustpan.

"No, Bella. I've got it." His tone made it clear this wasn't a suggestion.

"Ok, Dad. Goodnight then." I turned and started towards the stairs.

"Wait, honey" his tone softened. I paused in the doorway. "Did something happen at school today?" Shit, he had noticed. I wasn't about to tell him I was upset because a boy was rude to me.

"Nothing. I guess I'm just tired. It was a long day. I'm sorry about the glass. Goodnight."

"It's fine Bells. Goodnight."

When I got to my room, I locked the door. Renee had all the locks taken off of my bedroom and bathroom doors. I didn't really need to lock my door here, it was more of a "just because I can" thing. My homework passed along easily, except for biology. I busted my ass on that assignment. We'll see who gets the top grade… asshole. I eventually heard Charlie come upstairs and stand outside my closed door. He was listening, so I made some extra noise. When he was satisfied that everything was copasetic with all the paper rustling and such, he went to his room and closed the door.

Once I was satisfied with my biology assignment, I changed into my tank-top and unicorn pajama pants and crawled into bed. I reached my hand into my pillowcase and pulled out a small silver heart-shaped locket. It had a dove engraved on the front. I traced the engraving with my finger trying not to think of what it would be like right now without it. Renee hid it from me right before the move, thinking I would just assume I lost it. As if I would just chalk it up to a "lost item" and walk away. I swear my mom wasn't too bright sometimes. It would be easier to walk away and leave my own arm. I noticed it was gone almost immediately. I could almost feel its absence before I ever saw it wasn't there. She didn't hide it very well, so I just waited until the day my plane left and snatched it up. She probably hadn't noticed it was gone yet. Charlie hasn't said anything about it, and my room never looked like he came in here to look for anything.

I just laid there and clutched the locket in my fist. The green eyes were gone now; it was just the hard brown eyes. They bored into my soul accusingly. Right before I broke down, they were joined by a softer set of brown eyes looking at me with love and tenderness overshadowing the harshness and making me feel comforted. These hallucinations were a new addition to my nightly ritual. It had been the same for almost a year: I threw my hair into a ponytail, put on my pajamas, climbed into bed, and grabbed the locket from my pillowcase. There were never any changes, until now. I had to hold that necklace; it was the only way I could dream of him. The good dreams anyway. The terrifying nightmares came on their own, no matter what I did.

Tonight it was different. I couldn't relax, the locket felt odd in my hand, it made me panic a little. My locket was my one concrete tie to the life I used to have, a happy life. In one short year, I went from actually being Happy Bella to barely being able to pretend I was. My life had been completely turned upside down and inside out. I know some people get anxious about their birthday, like when they turn 30 or 40, but not when they turn 18. My impending birthday didn't have me anxious; it had me near an emotional breakdown. I had no idea how I was going to handle that day. It was only a few short weeks away. No faking a personality that day. I had no idea what Charlie had planned, but it better include me skipping school.

I had a moment of weakness. I let myself give in and just remember that night, the smile on his face, the light kisses he placed on my eyelids, his hand warm in mine. He was so excited that he had saved enough money to get me the locket. His whole face beamed with pride and anticipation as he kissed the back of my hand and slipped it into my palm. It brought tears to my eyes, tears that came with vengeance. They didn't get to spill at lunch, like they wanted, or while making dinner, or while doing the dishes. They weren't going to let me hold them back now, with no one around to strengthen my resolve. I tightened my grip on the locket, and it started to cut into my hand. I didn't fucking care. A tiny cut was nothing compared to what I was feeling, like my entire heart was being ripped from my chest.

I was sobbing, uncontrollably. I buried my face in my pillow. I had to be careful not to wake Charlie. My nightly sob fest, also a usual part of the ritual, would be reported to Renee immediately, even if it was after midnight. I was crying so hard it was hurting my chest, and I couldn't breathe. I felt isolated. Like I was standing in a cavernous room, stuck to the floor, sinking. No one could reach me. No one could help me. No one knew how to pull me out. I couldn't escape this; I couldn't struggle against the slow sink into depression. I knew I should have, I should have been fighting from day one. But I never had the desire to fight it and win; I got a sick pleasure out of it, letting it pull me down. This was my pain. I horded it and held on to it. I could feel it, in the pit of my stomach, hardening like a pearl. An inky black pearl, more precious to me than any real treasure. It was the only thing I had left. I would never let it go.

The next morning I woke up to thunder crashing in the distance. Perfect. It fit my mood. My hair was a tangled mess, and my pillow was damp and slimy from a mixture of tears and snot. The necklace was still in my hand like always. There was a small blood spot in my palm from the point of the heart. I could hear Charlie rustling around in the kitchen. I sat up and looked in the mirror. Oh shit. My face was puffy and red. My stomach felt sick. I had to really book it to the bathroom, or I was going to hurl all over my room. I made a break for it, fumbling with the lock I forgot to undo last night. My stomach was heaving and I was near the breaking point when I heard the lock click and pushed my way out the door.

Last night had been bad, the worst in months. It felt like I had been hit by a truck, my whole body hurt. I felt feverish. I was starting to come to the conclusion that last night's episode wasn't related to this morning's symptoms, when there was a knock on the bathroom door.

"Are you feeling alright? I heard you getting sick. Do you need some help?" Charlie asked, as he tried to push the door open slowly.

I pushed back with my foot and heard a double thud as his knee and head hit the door from his forward motion. "No, I think I have the flu." The fucking flu. I couldn't remember the last time I had the flu. I was laying in the fetal position on the floor. The cold tile felt good on my forehead.

I heard him take a step back to give me some privacy. "Well, this is about the time it usually starts to go around up here. A few people at City Hall have been out with it. I'll call the doctor's office." I heard him walk into his room and use the phone. I might have been delusional, but I could have sworn I heard him arguing. I never heard him raise his voice before. I'm sure he does, considering his job title, but since I only lived with him a few weeks in the summer every year since I was 2 I've never had the experience of being yelled at by him. I just stayed curled up on the cool bathroom floor, praying to the porcelain gods every few minutes when my stomach would wrench again.

"Bells, I called Dr. Stanford's office, and he's booked, I guess you aren't the only flu victim today. They are going to send another doctor to the house. His name is Dr. Cullen." It must have been the fever, but he sounded pissed off. Wait, did he say house?

"They make house calls here?"I muttered through violent heaves.

"They do for me." I think it was an attempt at humor but it was lost on me at this moment. "I have to get to the station, but Dr. Cullen will be here in about an hour. Are you ok with him all set up before I leave, ok?"

"Ok Dad." I was too weak to put up much of an argument.

"I'll be right back." I heard closet doors being opened, and there were several trips up and down the stairs. Finally he came into the bathroom. "Can you get up?"

"I don't think so." I hadn't moved at all from my position on the floor. Charlie picked me up, like he used to do when I was a child. I was surprised that he could do it. I had a slender frame but I was no child. He carried me down to the living room, and I saw there was a bed made up on the couch. He put a bucket on the floor and some bottled water on the coffee table. The phone and the remote were both within reach. Charlie laid me down on the couch, and actually tucked me in. He sat there for a second, smoothing my hair back. It felt nice, like he could make me feel better, almost.

"You do feel really warm. If you get worse before the doctor gets here, just call 911 and I'll be here within a few minutes." I nodded in understanding and closed my eyes. I was already drifting back to sleep. I never heard him leave.

I was having fitful dreams about boys with green eyes, when I heard someone softly calling my name. It sounded sort of far away so I wasn't sure if it was real or just a dream.

"Ms. Swan. Ms. Swan…please wake up. Isabella?"

I hated my full name. I rolled over and opened my eyes. My first thought was that the fever had taken over my brain and I was hallucinating. There was a drop dead gorgeous man sitting on the edge of the couch calling my name. The fever apparently was a dirty one, because I thought I was about to have some sort of pornographic delusion. I wasn't entirely upset by that. He kind of looked like that jock character from the movie "Can't Hardly Wait", only not as bulky, and he had golden blonde hair with sea blue eyes. I stared at him without speaking, what the hell, it was only a delusion right. Social norms don't apply.

"Hello, Isabella." Oh shit, no delusion, real person. "I'm Dr. Cullen. I believe your father told you I was coming?" He was my doctor? I was suddenly grateful for the flu.

"Oh yeah. Hi. Um...you can just call me Bella." My voice sounded scratchy and raw which was an accurate reflection of how it felt.

"Of course… Bella." He flashed me a grin and if I was standing my knees would have buckled. It just wasn't right for a father to look that good. I think I started to blush from my thoughts because he started checking my vital sign. "Now, what seems to be the problem today? Your father mentioned the flu?" He had a tender voice and a concerned manner about him. I listed my symptoms, and he continued with all the routine checkup stuff.

"Well, Bella, it does look like you have the flu. I don't know your previous medical history, but you seem to be in good health overall. You should be fine to go back to school on Monday. Just take it easy this weekend, and drink plenty of fluids. I'll drop a prescription for some pain medicine off at the station so your father can pick it up for you. If your symptoms worsen, have your father call my office, but I'm sure you'll bounce back quickly."

"Thank you Dr. Cullen."

"Anytime. I'm always happy to help the Chief. And Alice would never forgive me if I let you suffer until Dr. Stanford had an opening for you."

"Alice?" I was totally confused, she knew this mouthwatering man? "You know Alice?"

"Yes...oh I'm sorry, I assumed you knew. I'm Alice and Edward's uncle..." Edward? Who the hell was Edward? "…and Emmett's father. They mentioned you over breakfast this morning."

"Oh, umm yeah. Alice and Emmett." Using all this brain power was making me tired. I was starting to fall asleep again.

"I'll let you rest now. Don't forget to call if you get worse, or if you don't feel better by Monday." He put on his coat and I heard the door click when he left.

I never heard my dad come home to check on me. I never even fully woke up when Charlie gave me Dr. Cullen's medicine and a drink of water. I was in a daze; he even had to help me to the bathroom. When I finally woke up with a clear head, it was Sunday evening. I barely remembered anything from the past three days. I had done nothing but sleep since Dr. Cullen left Friday morning, which was good because at least I stopped throwing up. I blinked my eyes and stretched a bit. My limbs were sore from being cramped up on the couch for three days. Charlie was sitting in his recliner, watching football and eating pizza. It actually smelled good.

"Dad." I muttered out in a half whimper. He turned as I sat up.

"Hey, how're you feeling?"

"Better." I was still a little weak, but overall I felt much better. Human again at least.

"Good. Jessica called about 20 times to see if you were feeling better. I think she's upset that you couldn't go shopping with her. Alice Cullen stopped by with your homework."

Of course, Alice was the only one thoughtful enough to gather my homework and drop it off. "I wasn't aware you were friends with Alice."

"She's in my English class." The mention of Alice brought back my conversation with the doctor, "Dad. Dr. Cullen…he's Alice's uncle?"

"Yes. He also has a son, Emmett. Fantastic football player that boy, I heard they won the game Friday night because of him. I hope he decides to try for the Pros." Leave it to Charlie to bring football into the conversation.

"Who is Edward then?" I asked still not knowing how I missed this third part of their family. Charlie's face turned dark. The expression surprised me. I was suddenly very happy I was his daughter and not some criminal he was arresting.

"When did you meet him? Did he bother you?"

"No, I don't think I've met him. Dr. Cullen said he was Alice and Edward's Uncle. I just wondered who he was. Is he off at college or something?"

"Edward is Alice's twin brother. If you haven't met him yet, be very glad. He is a real ass. Bella, stay away from him. Alice and Emmett are great kids, but Edward is the black sheep in the Cullen family." His tone was harsh. I wasn't sure what to say. Luckily Charlie changed the subject.

"Let me make you some chicken soup." He jumped up and made his way to the kitchen. I could tell from the racket that he wasn't used to finding his way around the kitchen. He made the soup, out of the can of course, and brought it to the couch for me. We sat together in the living room the rest of the night, flipping through the channels. There was no more talking, but it was a comfortable silence. My mind kept trying to process Charlie's reaction to this Edward person. Could one person really be that bad? Forks was a small town, not much happened here. Yes, there are the standard high school parties that get out of hand, but nothing that warranted hard feelings from my dad, not like this. He was a pretty easy going guy. I was sure I had not met this Edward yet. I don't remember anyone looking like an Alice twin. If there was a boy walking around at school that looked like Legolas from Lord of the Rings surely I would have noticed. That is what I imagined her male twin would look like, only with dark hair. He would have stuck out like a sore thumb, most of the boys I had seen at school were just the same basic high-school boy body with varying shades of hair. Nothing notable. Except for Emmett with his massiveness, and Mike Newton with his creepiness but neither one came close to Alice. There was Jasper, who certainly had the good looks but from what I saw of them at lunch they were definitely NOT brother and sister.

Charlie went upstairs for the night and I decided just to stay on the couch again. This Edward thing was like a pebble in my shoe. I started mentally scanning through all the people I met at school. Suddenly the boy with the green eyes flashed in my memory. I bolted upright. No fucking way. Images from my last day of school started replaying in my mind. He had been sitting at their table, but that didn't mean anything, right? I concentrated on the contours of his face. He didn't look exactly like Alice, but I could see some similarities. He wasn't bad looking, for sure. If he wasn't such a complete asshole he might even be attractive. Really attractive. Their eyes were the same shape, they both had high cheekbones. But her features were so delicate and magical like a fairy and his were hard and linear like a Greek god. His jaw line was so set and strong. Of course it could have been the fact that he was clenching his teeth. I started to imagine him on the top of a Grecian mountain wearing a skimpy toga, his chest bulging, looking up to the heavens…..what the hell…back to reality Bella.

Fuck, no wonder Charlie hated him. The kid was a royal dick. I wondered what happened in the womb to make Alice so nice and Edward so evil. Knowing that he was apparently an equal opportunity hater, made me feel better.

I was tired again, so I reached into the pillow Charlie had gotten out of my room, and pulled out the locket. I fell asleep without tears tonight, my mind full of curiosity about the boy with the penetrating green eyes.

A/N: REVIEWS MAKE US ALMOST FORGET THAT WE ARE WAITING ON A WIDE AWAKE UPDATE. WAIT..NOT REALLY. BUT DID YOU CATCH THE "UNICORN PAJAMA PANTS?" AG ROX SO HARD SHE BEING REFERED TO IN FANFICTION. LOL

SO, I KNOW WE'VE SPOILED ALL OF YOU BY GETTING THE CHAPTERS UP PRETTY FAST, BUT (YES THERE IS A BUT) WE STARTED THIS WEEKS AGO. WE WERE GOING TO WAIT LONGER TO POST, BUT WE GOT EXCITED WHEN WE GOT GOOD REVIEWS. LOL. SO FAR WE HAVE UP TO CHAPTER 6 WRITTEN. 5 & 6 ARE OFF WITH THE BETA. BE PATIENT GUYS. WE LOVE YOU!