Shifts and paper work, parade and stake outs, patrol and car rides, it all flew by because I have a Ms. Stewart in mind. Days and hours, even minutes were just numbers, even though I cannot wait to see her face again. I close my eyes and I see her face and it's the second best thing. So I'm settling for the second best thing when I'm at work. Observant Dov thought I was sleeping on the job and I said out loud that I was just in deep thought. But of course he bothers me. I almost threw a stapler at him.

She has taken over my mind, Holly. I check my phone constantly to see if there's a text from her. I pour coffee and my mind wanders to when we just had coffee hours ago before work and how she gently touched my hand that made me all tingly inside. Why is this happening to me? I am so into her. And I'm not even denying it anymore.

I cannot get enough and we haven't even done the deed. Who the fuck says 'done the deed' anymore?! We have not had sex yet. There. Granted it's only been a few days, close to a week, that we confessed these feelings to one another. I'm not even complaining about the make out sessions that happened in shower, on her couch, in her kitchen, in the bathroom, at her office, and her couch. I really really like her couch.

But if I were Holly, maybe I wouldn't be able to wait any longer. Right? Not because I'm so Gail Peck oh look at me I'm still kinda beautiful, no not in that way. In a lesbian kinda way. I don't even know what that means. Like, how long can Holly really wait? Coz if I were to be honest and this was like my old relationships...we would have done the deed already. Dammit! We would have had sex already! Just say sex, Gail! Sex! It's not a bad word! Nobody can hear your thoughts!

Like, how does that work? I mean, we fit perfectly together, Holly and I. When we are on my favorite spot, her couch, our bodies just mold together. It doesn't even matter who's on top or bottom. She just feels so good. Too good at times. The first time we feel into the couch was by pure accident. Our kisses got too heavy, my knees got weak, hands all over, and I stumbled over and the couch broke our fall. I was on my back and she was grazing over me. And we laughed and interrupted her with a kiss because she just tasted so good. Holly lowered herself slowly, suddenly aware that the space between us doesn't exist. The weight of her body on mine was indescribable. I let out a sigh that sounded more like a moan I've been holding on to. And just like that she let out a light groan near my ear that made me lose all control.

"Hello? Gail? Earth to Gail?"

Fucking Dov. He pulls me out of the awesome memory. I probably need to go back to work anyways. This Holly thing is quite a distraction.

"What?" I barked.

"Have you finished that report from two days ago? The burglary from 7th ave? Nash wants to see it, if you have it."

"Traci! Yes! I have it. Where is she?"

"She's over there. Why are you so excited? It's a bit freaky."

"Shut up Dov."

"Tone it done."

I hurry towards Traci who's making coffee. I hand her my report and I find myself staring at the coffee. I don't know if I'm thirsty for more, considering I've downed my third one today. And the day isn't even over yet. Maybe I'm just nervous on the subject I'm about to bring up.

"Hey Nashy."

"Gail." She paused and she looks at me quizzically. "Would you like me to make you a cup?"

"No. I've had plenty. Actually I have a question." I look around the room and no one is here. Not that I care what people think, I don't. I just don't want to be heard is all.

"I ahhhh hmmm. I need advice...umm...sooo"

"Just spit it out, Gail."

"Well, I don't know how to say it without sounding like a perv." I look around once again.

"What could you possibly say that would be considered such a thing." She mocks me.

"I'm serious."

"Okaaay. But just spit it out already."

"I ahhhh we haven't...Holly and I...we haven't you know! And I really want to, I just don't know what to do, you know..." And with that I do hand gestures in the air that scares both Nash and I. Fail. Traci's eye widen with my confession, but truly who else am I suppose to talk to? Holly? Yeah right.

"You have not..."

"We haven't...done the deed yet" I whisper out loud. Frustration is setting in because now that I'm talking about it, I'm getting more more nervous.

"Gail, nobody says that anymore. Just say sex. You and Holly haven't had sex yet." Traci says this like nonchalantly, which makes me relax a little.

"Exactly."

"Say it."

"Say what?! That Holly and I...haven't had sex yet?! Okay! Holly and I have not had sex yet and I really really really want to and I don't know how or what. Gosh!" I look around the room once again because my voice is getting higher and louder. I'm probably redder too.

"I just wanna see you flustered, that's all." And she chuckles likes it the cutest thing. It's really not. "Look Gail, sex is easy. It's a natural thing. It should come easy and naturally. I can't tell you how the whole lady on lady thing works. Which btw, what makes you think I know something on that department?"

"You totally just repeated yourself, Trace! And I come to you because you are my friend. And I don't ever recall that we've covered all your wild college days over drinks. You're no help. And I'm taking this coffee."

"Look Gail. I'm sorry. I'm really flattered that you asked me for advice and here it is. Just do what feels good? You know? Just go with the flow and let Holly guide you. Just think how your first time with man was like...You didn't know what you were doing either. So just trust Holly. And if you don't like my advice, do research. Google has all the answer."

"Google...hmmmm. I'm still taking this coffee."

"I think you've had enough."

"Really Traci? You wanna go there? I can tell Steve about that one time in Vegas" I bring the mug to my lips and take a sip. I toast my mug to her and she just smiles and chuckles. I leave the kitchen and head to my desk. Google. Why didn't I think of that?! But I can't do it here at work. My phone should suffice. Oh there's a text from Holly.

H: Hey there! My place tonight? Chinese or Thai? But I think pizza...

Pizza. This woman has stolen my heart.