Guess who's back and ready to water some Plance?
She had to tell him. And she had to tell him soon.
Part of her was tempted to just walk up to him, grab him, and kiss him. But there were several reasons she couldn't do that.
A. She wasn't confident enough for such a brazen move.
B. This wasn't a 90's rom-com.
Pidge paced back and forth in her new temporary quarters at the Galaxy Garrison. They'd decided that this would be the best meeting spot on Earth for the time being, and she knew that Lance would be arriving on base any minute now.
What was she going to do? She couldn't back out— if there was one thing she was proud of, it was that Katie Holt never backed out of a promise. She kept them, like she always would. But how was she going to fulfill this one without it winding up a complete and utter mess?
Her mind flashed back to their conversation a few nights ago. Since then, he'd opened up a bit more— apparently he and Allura had a talk about a month ago. She wondered why she hadn't noticed how different they'd acted around each other after that (oh yeah, that's because she'd been avoiding him).
Pidge scoffed. Some paladin of intellect and daring she was.
This whole event had been taking up her mind for days. She couldn't tinker, she couldn't code, she couldn't do anything other than think about what the quiznak she was going to tell Lance.
She couldn't lie— he could tell when she lied, and either way, he deserved better than that. But what else could she do? Tell him the truth and make this already complicated situation even worse?
The day felt like it had come so quickly, and now, she was panicking. Her heart was racing, she couldn't stop pacing back and forth in her room, and she felt tingly all over with nerves. And to think, the girl who always had a plan (and at least two backups just in case) was the one without a vague notion as to what on Earth she was going to do.
"Ugh," she groaned, flopping down onto her bed. Why did she have to fall for him? Why did he have to fall for someone else? Why did any of this have to happen in the first place?
Her phone on the nightstand buzzed, and her heart practically jumped out of her chest.
S: Lance just got here. Meeting in 1 hour in room 205.
Pidge's anxiety spiked. Great, now Lance could be on his way down to her room any minute, and she still had no idea what she was going to do.
Suddenly a thought hit her, and she sprung up from her bed to dash into the bathroom. Did she look okay? Was her hair a mess? Did she need to brush her teeth? A quick look in the mirror answered that last question with a firm "yes." As fast as she could, Pidge scrubbed down her teeth and then took in a deep breath.
"Okay, calm down," she muttered to herself. "It's just Lance. Tell him the truth. He's your friend, he'll understand. Things might be a little awkward, but that's okay. It'll go away with time. You'll get over him. Things will go back to normal."
Her little pep talk weirdly helped, and for a moment, she actually felt her heart rate begin to decrease.
But then a knock at the door sent it skyrocketing again.
"Pidge? You in there? It's me."
She whipped around and stumbled. "Y-Yeah, give me a tick!" Pidge turned back and stared herself down in the mirror.
Deep breaths. Deep breaths. Don't panic. Good thoughts. Get it over with.
Seconds later, she was opening her door with a nervous smile.
"Hi," she greeted.
"Hello," Lance replied, grinning. "Am I allowed in?"
"Mmm, I don't know," she teased. "What reason do you have for gracing my presence?"
He snickered. "Well, I do seem to recall a promise you made, and you did say last night that you'd tell me today."
Pidge inwardly cursed her past self. What was it about being on the phone at three am that made her agree to stupid things?
She attempted to shrug casually. "It appears I did." With that, she opened the door wider and waved for him to enter.
Lance walked in slowly, taking in the bland Garrison room with curious eyes. "Guess you just got in too, huh?" he asked.
"Yeah." Wow, solid answer, Pidge, this was already going so well. She twiddled her fingers as he looked around, then finally, his eyes turned to her.
"So…" he trailed off. "I've been thinking about things."
Pidge swallowed. "Oh?"
Lance nodded. "Yeah…I decided that you don't have to tell me if you don't want to," he said. "It's kinda mean of me to make you tell a secret if you're not comfortable with it. And I don't want to do that to you, because…you know, I care about you, and I wouldn't want to be a jerk, so I—"
Quiznak, she wanted him to stop talking. Not because she hated what he was saying— if anything it made her tense shoulders finally relax— but because his lips were moving and his hands were fidgeting and she was walking toward him without even realizing it.
"—and I promise not to think bad things about myself again, and I wanted to say thank you for saying all of that too, e-even though I still don't know if I deserve it all, but—"
This was torture. He needed to stop looking so cute and bashful. He needed to stop messing with his hair nervously. He needed to stop doing all the things she liked before she did something she'd regret.
"—so anyways, I thought I'd go unpack and leave you alone, now—"
His blue eyes met hers again, and she knew it was too late.
Before she knew what she was doing, Pidge had grabbed his hoodie and pulled him down to crash her lips against his.
Lance froze, and in that moment, she realized what she'd done. Horror crashed down over her, and she nearly pulled away—
…but then Lance was kissing her back.
Hope bloomed in her heart. She pressed her lips into his just a bit more, almost like asking if this was really okay, and he responded in kind, tilting his head and deepening the kiss. His hands came up to cup her face, and she felt herself go weak at the knees.
Quiznak, this was actually happening. She was actually kissing Lance!
And it felt like a dream. His lips moving slowly against hers, gently, and every now and then deeper, as though he was adding an exclamation point at the end of the most beautiful sentence she'd ever read.
It was long and sweet and terrifying because she wanted to live in the moment, but she was so scared of what would happen when it was over. What if this was a mistake? What if he was kissing her on accident? What if he was confused?
But they were both running out of breath, and she knew that her daydream had to come to an end. They parted, panting lightly, and she let her hands fall from where she'd been clutching onto him.
"I'm sorry," she breathed, eyes shut tight. "I'm so sorry, Lance, I shouldn't have done that."
She could hear him swallowing hard. "P-Pidge, it's…it's okay."
At the sound of his voice, she managed to open her eyes. His eyes were wide, and his breathing was labored, and…was his hair messed up? Had she done that? She couldn't recall. His lips were what drew her attention the most— they were dusty pink and slightly swollen, and she had to force herself not to kiss those lips again.
Then the full weight of what she'd done hit her like a freight train, and she shrank back, ashamed. "I'm so sorry," Pidge whispered again.
Lance blinked dazedly. "Why?"
Her eyes darted to the ground. "Because I shouldn't have kissed you, because everything is already a mess, and I'm only making it worse—"
"Pidge, if I didn't want to kiss you back, then I wouldn't have."
Her head snapped up. His eyes held truth, though it was still mixed with shock and a tint of bashfulness.
Lance licked his dry lips, and she tried so hard not to watch it. "I, ah…can we sit down and talk about it?" he asked.
All she could do was nod. The only place to really sit down was the bed, so that's where they went. Lance sat down first, and Pidge went to place herself at a distance— but then he patted right beside him. Slowly, she did as he requested, finding that it was strangely warm in his presence.
His eyes met hers, and his cheeks flushed. "Um, do you wanna go first?" he asked.
Pidge hesitated, but nodded. "So…I like you," she admitted, feeling silly because if that wasn't obvious by now, then she didn't know what to do. "And, uh…that's why I was avoiding you."
One of his fingers in his lap twitched. "How— how long?" he questioned.
Her cheeks were burning. "Maybe a year."
There was silence. She ventured a peek at his face, but it still looked just as confused as before.
"So…why did you avoid me if you…liked me?" Lance pressed curiously.
Pidge wanted to hide her face behind her hands. "The Allura stuff," she mumbled. "I knew how much you liked her, and it made me jealous."
Again, silence. Lance's expression was contemplative, now. He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped. He did this once more, then finally, scooted himself around so that he could face her properly.
"So, I'll admit, this isn't what I expected today," he laughed awkwardly. Pidge couldn't help but grin sadly in agreement. "And, well, you know everything that happened with her a month ago," he swallowed. "But…"
"You're not interested," she filled in for him.
To her complete surprise, Lance's eyes filled with indignation. "What, no, I just— crap, I'm so bad at this," he groaned, then sighed. "I still need time to get over it, and I don't want to use you," he stated as quickly as he could.
Pidge blinked. "I…I don't think you're, um, you'd— use me."
Lance shook his head. "But I don't want to get into something with you when I'm not over her. That's not fair to you, Pidge."
Why did she feel like crying all of the sudden? Was that it? Was this how things were going to be? He was basically trying to find the nicest way possible to tell her he wasn't interested, and they were just going to have to live in this awkward state of having shared a kiss (and a really good one, at that) and that was it. Game over.
But wait, why was there movement in her peripheral vision?
She looked up, but then immediately looked back down again when she felt warmth envelop her hands. Light brown hands held pale ones, and she stared down at them with wide eyes.
"Are you okay with waiting for me?" Lance asked softly, and one of his thumbs was rubbing circles on her hand. "I still need time, but…I do want to try something with you, Pidge."
His words made her eyes flicker up to meet his. "What do you mean by something?"
A blush came over his face. "A relationship," he clarified. "W-With you, of course."
Though it had began to numb, her heart started pounding again. She dared to take one of her hands out of his grasp and place it on his cheek. "Really?"
He blinked, and his eyes glanced down at her lips— when had they started leaning in toward each other?— before he replied, "Yes."
It seemed no more needed to be said. They gave into the magnetic sensation pulling them together, and their lips met. If their first kiss couldn't be classified as passionate, this was even less so. It was shy, tentative, and ever so slow. Almost like a silent promise— she would wait, and he would be hers as soon as he could get his heart back together.
There was no rush in it, but by the sounds of soft moans, it was evident they both wished there was. They wanted to get on with it. They wanted to figure out what all this was as soon as possible. They wanted to live in this kind of peace and exhilaration all the time…but certain things had to be taken care of first.
Pidge didn't know what to think when he finally left— they did have a meeting to get to in twenty minutes, after all. All she knew was that she'd never been so happy for her often problematic impulsive behavior in her life.