Chapter notes:
Thank you to everyone for the reviews. They are encouraging and greatly appreciated.
A great big thanks to Bittenev for her super-beta skills and encouragement.
And thanks to Twilightzoner for her speedy validation.
Disclaimer:
I'm still not SM and I own nothing Twilight related. No copyright infringement is intended.
Some of the events in Edward's backstory are based on the life of the brilliant inventor Jacques Fresco of The Venus Project. .com
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Chapter 4
BPOV
I met Alice at the cafe the next morning. She bounced as she waited, never stilling for a minute. My cheeks flushed and I felt a pang of guilt as I saw her. It was difficult not to remember what I'd been doing with her brother the previous night.
"Hi Alice," I called.
"Yeah! You're finally here," she said at the same time. She threw her arms around me in a hug and, before I knew it, she was leading me to her car. Talking very quickly as she named about a dozen clothing stores.
Talk about a shop-a-holic. Maybe I could introduce her to a therapist to help her with that.
"Alice, just how many shops do you think we can fit into an hour?"
"Well, to tell you the truth I have a personal shopper and I told him all about you last night. He was here before they opened, preparing a selection of the best clothes from all of the shops I mentioned. Think of it as power shopping."
I checked her face for some sign that she was kidding. But I saw nothing to indicate she was anything but serious. Wow! Edward's family will intervene to get help for his very personal sexual problems, yet his sister has a chronic shopping addiction and they do nothing.
I decided to let it go. Because, let's face it, I had the best sex of my life the previous night, with her virgin brother, and we hadn't even been in the same house. And to think that sex was my job--my profession. How ironic was that?
I chuckled and decided to change the subject. I could let it go for now. "So, tell me about Edward. Has he always been shy?"
She flashed me a big smile, like she'd discovered more from my question than I intended to give away. "Well," she said as we pulled into the parking lot of the mall, "Yeah, I'd say Edward was always a loner. He spends a lot of time listening to music and just thinking."
Somehow that didn't surprise me. "How did he do in school? Did he have any friends?"
"Not really," she answered with a sigh. "Actually he quit school in the 8th grade. Edward is a genius and you know they don't always fit into a school situation. By the time he was 10 he was asking a lot of questions--questions boys that age shouldn't be asking and that made for a lot of conflicts with his teachers."
"Really?"
"Yeah, I guess it would be difficult to have a student in your 4th grade class who is better read than the teacher." She pulled into the parking lot of the mall and I realized that she must have been driving like a maniac to get there so quickly. She turned to me as she spoke. "Anyway, the principal saw something in Edward and he sectioned off part of the classroom and bought some special lab equipment with his own money. They let him read about the things that interested him. He was really happy for awhile." Her smile didn't reach her eyes as she continued, "But the other kids didn't like that he got special treatment and so they started picking at him. Then when he was 13, his principal died and he was no longer allowed the special privilege. So he built his own lab in the basement and he stopped going to school."
"So, he just never fit into the mold then? That makes sense." I could relate to Edward on so many levels. I'd never fit into the system either. I had difficulty surviving in the big world out there. I never knew what to say in social interactions. I always felt stiff and uncomfortable. But in the world that I'd created--in my therapy I was powerful. I could tap into someone else's energy and take away all of their grief and regret and fear and give them peace.
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We walked through the mall and I was surprised at how difficult it was to keep up with Alice. For a little person, she sure could move. We walked into an unmarked store front. Maybe it was space that companies would rent to use for periods of time.
I followed Alice through a maze of hallways to a room in the back. The room was long and narrow and lined with clothing displays.
"James?" Alice called, disturbing my racing thoughts and making me jump.
A blond man about my height appeared at her side. I hadn't even heard him approach. "Miss Alice," He crooned and took her hand and ducked into a sweeping bow, kissing her hand. "How good it was to hear from you yesterday."
He moved to stand beside Alice and surveyed me with the air of a very gay tailor. "Ah yes," James said, "I see what you mean Alice. I think the colors you mentioned will compliment her lovely complexion." He pulled out a rack of clothes and rolled it over to us.
As James continued to stare at me, Alice started pulling dresses and lingerie from the rack. She handed me some things and gestured to a curtained off area. "We'd better get started."
James had the good sense to take a hint. "I'll leave you ladies to it then. I'll be out front if you need me." He pivoted on his heel and sashayed out the door we'd entered.
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Alice made me model each outfit for her. She had an uncanny ability to pick the right sizes and styles for me. Even the lingerie fit like a glove, though I wouldn't model it for her. I had never really owned lingerie before, and I'd never had the desire. I had some nice bra and panty sets, but I'd never bothered with anything more elaborate than that. But now I wanted some. I picked out a couple of nice silk baby doll sets and some bras and panties just because they were so cute. I told myself that this had nothing to do with Edward. I'd never bought lingerie for a client before and that certainly was not what I was doing.
Unfortunately, James made a big show of holding up each piece for Alice as he wrapped them and put them in the bag. My face was burning scarlet by the time he was finished.
Alice smiled knowingly and handed me another bag when I was through. "Do you have time to get a bite to eat?"
"Um sure," I said, looking at my watch and noticing that we really had been only an hour. "What is this?" I held the bag out so that she'd know what I was talking about.
"Oh just a couple of dresses. They looked so good, I couldn't help myself." She gave me the big eyes and pouty lip.
I sighed. "Alice, I can buy my own clothes."
"I know you can. This is just my way of thanking you for coming with me today."
I smiled. "Well, you do have good taste. Okay. But I'm buying lunch."
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We settled into a booth in the small restaurant in the mall for a sandwich before we parted ways.
"So, Alice, tell me a bit about yourself. Are you married?"
"No, actually. I was in a relationship for a couple of years but we went our separate ways last year. His work took him to England and I decided it wasn't going to work for me. I need to be near my family and, I don't know, our relationship wasn't enduring enough I guess." She seemed very calm about the whole thing.
"But I thought you said that Edward had trouble watching everyone around him in relationships. You mean he's never had a relationship at all?" I had trouble believing that.
"Yeah, Edward had a girlfriend in high school for a short time, but nothing serious." She looked so sad when she talked about him. "What about you?" she asked. "Why aren't you in a relationship--or are you?"
I took a bite of my sandwich while I thought about her question. I'd had some relationship opportunities over the past few years. Rose was always trying to fix me up with someone. But I never really clicked with anyone. "No," I said, washing my food down with a mouthful of juice. "I haven't had much luck in the relationship department. It's kind of difficult, with my occupation and all. Not many men would be that understanding." And it was the truth. No man I had met would be secure enough to let his girlfriend be a sexual surrogate. And I hadn't met anyone worth giving it up for.
Alice looked like she understood more than I'd told her. "Yeah, I guess you're right." She paused for a moment as if she was weighing her words carefully. "What about Edward? He seems to really like you?"
My cheeks flushed with her comment. I couldn't help but be pleased even though I knew a relationship with Edward was impossible. I wanted him to like me. Alice ate, but I could see her watching me from the corner of her eye, gauging my reaction. "Well, Edward is a great guy, but he's a patient. So a relationship isn't really possible."
She didn't argue and I was relieved. We ate in silence for awhile before she asked the questions everyone wants to know but few people were brave enough to ask me. "What's it like? Do you have sex with all your patients?"
I almost choked on my juice, surprised by her boldness. Then I chuckled at her earnest expression. It was refreshing to be around Alice. This was someone I could really be friends with. I hadn't had a good friend since I moved away from Forks and the idea made me feel content in an odd way.
"No, I don't have sex with everyone. I counsel couples and individuals. I only have sex with the patients who have real sexual hurdles that they need to overcome in order to get better. Usually they are people who have suffered some abuse or who have performance issues."
"What do you do for couples?" Her eyes danced with excitement as she scrunched her face up in concentration. "I mean, I'm picturing you watching as they have sex and critiquing their performance--kind of like Simon Cowell on American Idol."
I laughed out loud at that. "No, I don't do that, but I could see where that would make a fun TV show--Reality Porn."
Her answering laugh was a high tinkling sound, like ice in a glass. "I can see it now. Your foreplay was good, but that climax needs some work."
"No, couples come to me with their bedroom troubles. The men usually come thinking that they'll pick up some new positions, but usually what's missing is intimacy. I generally have them sit in a sexual position, fully clothed and look into each others eyes. I give them advice on focusing their attention on pleasing each other, feeling every touch and caress to the fullest extent, rather than just concentrating on what they are doing and what position they are in."
Alice looked genuinely interested and we talked for awhile before I realized that it was time I got home and prepared to see Edward.
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EPOV
My morning was very strange. I wasn't used to sleeping so late--or much at all--and it made me feel a little disoriented.
Then the reason for my miraculous night's sleep came crashing back to me. I'd had my first orgasm in over 10 years--no not even that. The orgasms I had as a young teen could compare in no way to the intense pleasure I'd received from my phone conversation with Bella.
It had been the single most embarrassing and erotic thing that had ever happened to me. God what kind of fool was I turning into?
I was always the pragmatic one who could be counted on to do the right thing in any situation. Yet here I was obsessing over my psychiatrist. I guess it was a natural reaction--to feel this way for someone who brought me the kind of pleasure and release that I'd been missing all this time. She'd had other clients who had no doubt moved on with their lives once the therapy was finished. I'd just have to do the same. I was over thinking everything.
I'd just enjoy the time I had and worry about the aftermath later. Yeah! That really didn't sound like me. I'd always set my sights on the goal, created a plan to get there and followed it, never wavering. This time, the path had been chosen for me, by Alice and my family, but I consented to the therapy because I wanted a more normal life. I did want to get over my problems. Falling for my psychiatrist was not part of the plan, and I was afraid I was in danger of doing just that. But if I were to be honest about it, the idea of leaving and never seeing her again made the anxiety clench tight in my chest. That wasn't an option.
I groaned in frustration as I ate breakfast and prepared to see Bella this afternoon. I didn't know what she had planned today and my nerves were playing havoc with the whole situation. It had seemed so natural on the phone. I hadn't had to worry about anything. But the thought of seeing her made me more nervous than I had been that first day.
After getting dressed, I sat at my piano and played for awhile to calm my nerves. I was surprised I hadn't seen Alice yet this morning. She didn't usually let me away with putting her off, certainly not more than once. As my fingers ghosted over the keys, I was able to lose track of time and get into the music. A new song started to take form, filling me up with a sort of happiness that I had never really felt before.
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By the time I arrived at Bella's I was 10 minutes late. That's what happens when I get lost in music. I gasped when she opened the door. Her hair, still damp from the shower, curled in soft waves over her shoulders. Her cheeks were flushed, probably from the heat. She wore a blue silk dress that clung to her petite form in all the right places. I stood, dumbstruck for a moment.
"Hi," she said, pulling me out of my haze. "Come in." She stepped back to let me pass.
I cleared my throat in hopes that my voice wouldn't squeak. "Hi. Sorry about that. You look... stunning."
She laughed. "Thanks. I went shopping with your sister this morning."
I startled at that information. "Really? With Alice?"
She led me down the hall to her office. "Yeah. She's quite the force to be reckoned with."
I pictured poor Bella going through stores with Alice. The picture didn't seem to fit. "Um, yeah, she can't pass a cash register without seeing if it works."
"Definite shopping addiction." Bach was playing softly in the background and she had tea and shortbread laid out on the table today.
Well at least that explained why Alice hadn't been around to bug me this morning. "So, how did the little pixie rope you into a shopping trip exactly?" I stirred a bit of honey and lemon into my tea and took a sip.
Her face flushed darker still. That was interesting. Bella didn't seem like the blushing type. "Well, we made a bargain. She shouldn't be bothering you about your therapy for the next week at least."
I choked on my tea, sputtering between coughs. "Really?" I couldn't believe she would do that for me. She was brilliant. "Wow, thanks. You're a brave woman."
She laughed. "It wasn't so bad really. Alice is fun, if a little scary. I've lived here for a few years now but I don't have many friends. It was nice to get out for a bit and she does have good taste."
"I'll say," I muttered, hoping it was too low for her to hear. It was hard to believe she didn't have a lot of friends though. She was easy to talk to and interesting. But I was secretly glad that we had that one thing in common. I'd never felt connected to anyone beyond my family. Yet, I could see how easy it would be to be friends with someone like Bella--someone who could accept me as I was.
I had thought that seeing her again would be awkward, but it had all dissolved when I saw her, and the conversation about Alice was sufficient to distract me from my worries. But now that we were approaching my therapy again, I began to get nervous.
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BPOV
I'd taken the time to shower and make myself presentable for my appointment with Edward today. I didn't anticipate having intercourse, but thought we might build a bit on what we started last night.
When I opened the door, his jaw dropped and his eyes darkened along with his cheeks. He was so adorable in the green pinstriped shirt and tan pants. I could feel the heat radiating off him and I had to refrain from leaning into him as I invited him in. He smelled so fresh. I didn't know what that smell was exactly but if I could bottle it, I'd sell it by the gallon.
I shook off my thoughts and tried to refrain from getting too close until I could clear my mind. I made conversation about his sister, hoping it would distract him and myself. Edward was so witty.
I hadn't laughed so much in ages. And it did alleviate the tension for a few minutes. But it wasn't long before I felt his apprehension spike and it spurred my own nerves.
I couldn't avoid the topic forever.
"So, Edward, we made some good progress last night."
His cheeks reddened in reply. "Um, yeah, I guess we did." His eyes were trained on his tea cup and, no matter how hard I tried, he wouldn't make eye contact. We were back to the discomfort. I had to stop it before we lost all the ground we'd gained.
"Edward?" I waited for him to look up. It took a minute or two.
"Yes," he said, his voice so soft I could barely hear him.
"I thought we were past all the evasiveness. You have nothing to be embarrassed about, you know." I smiled my most encouraging smile.
He chuckled. "Yeah, I know. It's just hard for me to feel comfortable."
"I know, and you are doing really well. I thought I'd have more trouble today getting you to loosen up. It's to be expected." And it was--especially since he'd been so shy to begin with. "Do we need to do some tapping on your discomfort?"
"Okay."
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After a couple of rounds, he seemed much more comfortable. I couldn't feel any anxiety coming from him any more.
"So," he asked, looking more at ease as he leaned back into the couch. "How is it that you can feel what I'm feeling? Do you have a gift like mine?"
"I don't think so. I mean it's like intuition and it's accessible to anyone. Most people who work with energy therapies develop some measure of being able to share the same energy field as their clients. It's really just learning to trust the intuition that takes practice." Of course that didn't explain why it was stronger with him. But I didn't really understand that myself yet, so I couldn't very well explain it.
"And how did you do that tapping on the phone for me last night. I mean, you weren't even in the same room." His eyes shone with genuine interest. This was Scientist Edward, ever hungry for information. And he was mesmerizing. I found myself leaning into him as we spoke--a couple of geeks getting off on the quest for information.
"Well, it's hard to explain, but when I can feel your emotions, I just have to tap on myself and it works almost as well as tapping on you. And it doesn't matter where we are. If we're on the phone together, and we are interacting, then I can feel what you feel. That works the same with anyone. In fact, I could just concentrate on tapping on you, without actually touching you, and it would work most of the time. I know that must sound bizarre to a scientist..."
He looked stunned. "Would you mind showing me that sometime?"
"Sure, but now I think we should get back to your therapy. We'll work on mental tapping later."
Cue the blush. God he was the cutest thing. I was just itching to be able to touch him again. And since it was time to step up the therapy, I gave into the urge and reached out to squeeze his forearm.
"How do you feel now? Are you ready to work on some more physical work?"
I waited expectantly and was satisfied when he nodded.
"Okay, here you have it, every boy's fantasy. You don't have to be concerned about anything here--you don't need to worry about what I'm feeling or what I'm thinking. This is all about you."
I wanted to be sure we were clear on what was coming. I didn't want him to feel like he was under any pressure to perform in any way.
"Um..." his voice was low and hesitant. "Will you promise me something Bella?"
His eyes sought mine out and I felt the familiar tingling in my toes. I couldn't look away, couldn't focus on anything but the intense fire that I was afraid would burn me up and leave me charred.
He asked me a question didn't he? "Uh...yes?" I wasn't sure what I just agreed to.
Edward leaned closer and his scent sucked me in. God I wanted to taste him. It was taking all my concentration to not attack him. "Promise me you won't act when we're together."
I gave this a moment to sink in before I answered. I did usually tend to slip into a Dr. Swan character when I worked with clients. It was the only way I could get through all of the intimacy without losing myself. Could I really let that go with Edward? Could I expose my real self without breaking completely when we were no longer together?
I didn't know the answer. But I had little choice at this point. He affected me physically in ways that I never thought would be possible for me. The thought of turning away from these feelings left me cold. I could pretend he was my lover--that he could really love me for myself. And I could have this perfect moment to keep for later, to lock up in my heart.
And when he looked at me that way, with the sparkling eyes and the crooked grin, my insides turned to mush and I'd follow him anywhere--do anything he asked.
"Okay, I can do that."
His answering smile was blinding. "Thank you, Bella." He let out a long sigh.
"We'll take it easy and if you feel any anxiety just let me know and we'll stop and do some EFT." I searched his eyes to make sure he was taking this in. "I mean it. You need to let me know at the first sign of discomfort of any type. This is painless therapy. We don't push through anything. Got it?"
"Yes," he said and his face flushed once again. I was hit with a wave of desire and I smiled. I knew I was attractive enough, but my looks couldn't compare with his perfectly chiseled beauty. How could he possibly want me so much? It must be just wishful thinking on my part.
"So, shall we begin?" I made myself focus on him. This was about his needs and my job was to make sure I kept that in mind.
"Sure." The word was soft, barely more than a whisper, but it charged the air with electricity. I could feel the heat rolling off of him and it caused my face to flush and my heart to quicken.
"All right, I want you to take a moment and think about being intimate with me."
His jaw slackened and that lovely blush deepened. He swallowed. "Um... you want me to... uh..."
Absolutely adorable. Gah! Let's face it I would never get over this man. "Fantasize about me, right now. Yes. That's what I want you to do."
He looked like I had just asked him to drop his pants--and in a way I guess I had. This required him to show me something intensely intimate. Maybe I should let him off a little easier.
"Let me help you. I'd start out like this." I leaned him back into the corner of the couch and sat on the edge. He was stiff and unsure. "It's okay." I tried to reassure him. "You are in complete control. If you don't like something, just say so."
He seemed to calm a bit with my urging. I reached up and touched the smooth skin on his cheeks. "I'd begin with these beautiful eyes. I've never seen anyone with eyes quite this color before." And I allowed myself a moment to get lost in them. It would be easy to indulge in my own fantasy and imagine that he was in love with me--that he was mine. "You know the eyes are overlooked by a lot of people, but it is the quickest way to bring intimacy to sex. When I counsel couples, I always have them spend time really looking into each other's eyes."
I trailed my finger along the lines of his face to his lips. I ran my thumb over his bottom lip and his mouth opened in response. "Then I'd think about the soft skin of your lips and how it would feel to kiss them. Mmmmmm... and I'd just savor that feeling--that wanting."
His eyes darkened and a rumbling built in his chest.
"My lips are tingling just from thinking about it. Can you feel it?"
"Yes."
The air crackled around us, the electricity pulling us together. I couldn't hold back much longer. I took the last shred of control I could find and let myself search out his feelings. I couldn't find any discomfort. "Are you feeling any anxiety right now?"
"No," he answered immediately, "no anxiety at all." And he sounded a little surprised.
I licked my lips, letting the time stretch as I leaned in close to him. I stopped a couple of inches from his lips and spoke in a whisper. "I'm going to kiss you now. Okay?"
"Yes," he hissed.
I brushed my lips softly against his. It was like striking a match. My blood ignited and the kiss quickly became more heated than I intended. He tasted of mint and spice. His tongue worked against mine as we explored each other thoroughly. My hands tangled in his hair, the silky texture spurring me on. I heard a mewling sound and wondered where it could be coming from before I realized it was me. I was making that sound. I had to get it together before he thought I was some helpless animal attacking him.
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EPOV
I'd imagined kissing Bella, but the reality didn't come close. Every time she touched me, I felt an electrical energy pass through me, but this was so much more intense. It surged through me, all the way to my toes. Her tongue gently parted my lips and searched out mine. I poured all of the feelings I'd been repressing over the past couple of days into that kiss. I met her challenge and deepened it further, exploring her entire mouth. I wanted to drown in the taste of her. I couldn't get enough.
Her little hands tugged at my hair, making me moan with the intensity of it. She trailed them from my neck to my chest and I was sure she could feel my heart racing under her fingertips.
I pulled back, gasping. She continued to kiss a line between my jaw and my ear, then moved to my neck. My pants grew tighter as she caressed my chest and kissed my skin everywhere she could reach. I moaned and gasped as she touched me.
She took my hand and placed it on her waist. I ran my hands up and down her sides, feeling the swell of her breasts and the curve of her hip. God the things she made me want. I'd never experienced anything like it before.
I ran my thumbs over her breasts and felt her nipples harden under my touch. She moaned into my mouth and I bit back a groan.
She leaned back and began to unbutton my shirt. Her eyes sought out mine and seemed reassured by whatever she found there. Once my chest was bare, she kissed all of the skin she couldn't reach before, flicking her tongue out to lick my muscles and nipping gently at my nipples.
I was panting now, not able to get enough air. When she went for my pants I stopped her. "Wait, I want to touch you too."
She met my eyes and considered it for a moment before she nodded. She stood and pulled her dress over her head in one movement and then she stood before me in a midnight blue silky bra and panty set. I almost came right there in my pants without having been touched at all. Her creamy white skin in contrast to the blue was absolutely stunning. Her breasts were full and her stomach flat. I could see all of her muscles perfectly defined, making that v at her waist.
A sexy smirk graced her beautiful face and I knew I must be staring. She came to me slowly, swaying her hips before climbing onto my lap to straddle me. I groaned as I let my hands wander over her back to reach down and cup her ass. God she felt perfect--her skin so soft beneath my fingers.
Her lips met mine and I was drowning in sensation. Her little hands ran over my chest and back came up to tangle in my hair. I could do this all day, just kiss her. And there was no anxiety--no worry over what would come next. I just stayed in this moment and allowed myself to feel all the pleasure that she gave to me.
Finally, she pulled away and undid my pants, pulling them off along with my boxers. "Mmmm Edward, you are so beautiful. You're perfection."
That was exactly how I felt about her. Perfection.
"Can I touch you?" She bit her lip waiting for my response.
"Of course," I said, panting for air, trying to get control so I wouldn't spill into her hand at the first touch.
But nothing could have prepared me for the feel of her small hand closing over my length. It was heaven.
She moaned then and dipped her fingers into her panties before pulling them back out and closing them over me again, slippery now with her juices. She kissed me and sucked on my neck as she pumped me, twisting her hand in long strokes. It was beyond anything I could have imagined. The smell of her desire and the feel of her hand wet around me as she worked.
She whispered in my ear, telling me how wet she was for me, how hot I made her, how much she'd like to feel me inside her. And I felt the pressure building, pushing me higher than I'd ever been before. It was bliss so intense that I was afraid I'd split into tiny pieces any second. Then it was on me and I came in great waves all over her body. I was mortified at first--afraid I would have offended her. But I was too spent to do anything about it.
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BPOV
I'd never felt more powerfully erotic than when I pulled my dress over my head and locked eyes with Edward. He sat there on my couch shirtless, hair sticking out at odd angles and eyes heavy lidded and shining for me. That blush spread from his cheeks down his neck.
Despite our situation, I allowed myself the fantasy that he wanted me. And he made it easy for me. I straddled his lap and attacked him, kissing him fiercely and his hands roamed over my body, hot and electric. My nipples strained against the satin fabric of my bra and I could feel his arousal pressing into me right where I wanted him.
It would have been so easy to take this much further than I'd intended. But that probably would have shut things down for us, and I wanted to get through this without having to stop and do EFT. I wanted him to experience the whole gamut of a sexual experience without interruption.
I pulled away for a moment to finish undressing him. When I pulled his boxers off, I felt my jaw drop. He was gorgeous all over. His muscles all perfectly chiseled and his erection long and thick. My mouth watered as I took in the sight before me. I wanted nothing more than to taste him, but I knew he needed my kisses to distract him. I'd save oral sex for another time.
I wrapped my hand around him and thrust my tongue into his mouth at the same time. God he tasted amazing. And he felt so hard and hot in my hand. This man was made for sex.
My hand was dry and I didn't want to give him friction burn so I pulled away and dipped my own hand into my panties, getting it good and wet, which was easy considering that my panties were drenched. He moaned my name as I wrapped my wet hand back around him and started to stroke. I kissed his neck as he panted endearments.
I felt him getting close and I nibbled on his ear while I whispered naughty things to him, telling him exactly what he did to me and how much I wanted him inside me.
And there was nothing more amazing than watching Edward come undone. He thrust his hips into my hand as he grunted and growled. His eyes were pure and open and filled with unbridled lust and wonder. He came in long streams all over my stomach and chest and I didn't care. I would take all he gave me.
When it was over, he looked at me in apology for the mess he made. I grabbed a towel and cleaned up and sat back, leaning against him while he caught his breath.
"Thank you," he said when he was able to speak.
He was thanking me? He'd shared such a big part of himself with me just then. He'd been so open and vulnerable. What could I say to that? I'd give anything right now to just keep him here with me and never let go. "Oh, Edward. That was beautiful. Thank you for trusting me so much."
He looked at me like a love struck teenager and I couldn't help but laugh. He couldn't get any more adorable if he tried.
"Hey," I said, helping him up from the couch, "what do you say we get cleaned up? If you don't have other plans you could stay for dinner and a movie tonight." I couldn't help myself. I didn't want him to leave yet. And even though I knew it would be better to create more space between us, I couldn't do it tonight. I wasn't strong enough. I might pay for it later, but I wanted nothing more than to spend more time with this amazing man.
His smile was blinding. "Sure, sounds great."
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Endnotes:
Well, would you let him just leave after that?
Leave me some love and I'll give you a nice, wet, soapy Edward for your shower. Yum!