Dont Own SoN
Chapter 4
Katie called me that night like she promised. Told me she was okay and resting. Katie also told me Spencer was broken badly and when I told her I needed to be near her. Katie put her foot down and told me no. that I have to let Spencer approach me.
So I told Katie that Kristen wasn't aloud near her and if I heard from anyone that she was. I would hold her responsible. Katie understood and then hung up.
That was a month ago. A fucking month. Christmas break started and Spencer went home to 'think'. It was killing me to be so far away but I understood.
No not really. I didn't understand anything. Why the fuck would she be ignoring me? I didn't do anything wrong. I was protecting her.
Fuck my life…. actually. Fuck my horrible human life. I have seriously failed at learning to be normal in this culture.
Was it wrong for me to be so protective over her? Was I suppose to let it continue? I just don't understand.
Stop wallowing.
I was in my phoenix form perched on a tree outside of Hattiesburg. I was visiting Mellissa…. No more like hiding from the human world. I haven't shifted into a human for over three weeks. She was in her leopard form.
Shut it Mellissa. I said looking up towards the sky.
Oooo. I'm sorry oh great one. I forgot I wasn't allowed to speak, without your permission. She bowed respectfully.
I swooped down in front of her. You are a fucking bitch, Mellissa.
Mellissa shows her teeth. I'm a bitch?
I look away and close my eyes. No, your not. I am sorry for intruding on your life. I shall leave.
Mellissa used her paw and shoved me over. I didn't resist as she pinned my wings down and hovered above me.
You are being stupid. I love you bitch…. In a more friend way now but I love you and I see that your hurting. Do you really think secluding yourself to the forest without have Weres around is healthy? We are meant to have company.
True. Travel in packs. But still being alone has made me appreciate life a little.
You're the one who went out wanting to find a human to love. And look you found it. But she wont reciprocate like another should. Because she is human.
Deep down I know she's wrong. Spencer does love me. I know it. She is just a different species and it requires more time.
It's killing me, Mellissa. I said. My eyes were watering. For the first time in this whole situation I started crying. i sobbed loudly as I turned into a human. Mellissa quickly got off my arms and shifted back into herself. She wrapped her arms around me and we just laid there for hours as I cried.
"I want to tell Leigh Ann about you." Mellissa says taking a bite from her sandwich. We were in a dinner in Hattiesburg enjoying a late meal. It was three days after my break down and I have been slowly getting back into the grove of staying in my human form.
"Oh… kay." I said nodding.
"So you are okay with it. Like in all seriousness?" Mellissa said curiously.
I sat my fork down and connected eyes with her. "Are you happy?"
Her whole face brightens. "I am. She's sooo…." She shook her head. "I had no idea what my parents meant when they said when you found your love everything would change…." She took a breath and her eyes glazed over. "I thought it was you for the longest time… you seemed so perfect for me. but I knew something was off. When I carried you out of the battle and you became conscious for a brief second, I knew we were supposed to be life long companions. You're the closets thing I had to love. You're my best friend. But Leigh Ann. I feel so happy. When she touches me at any moment of the day, the whole world melts away."
I grin at her. "I know its only been about five months but are you guys thinking about…?" I stopped myself.
"Yes…" she blushes. "We have talked about it a great deal. And I want to. I really believe we are a soul."
A soul is what Humans call soulmates. In the Were world we believe our god actually creates soul mates from one entity and splits it in two to be born into our physical forms. Once we find our soul, we bond for the remainder of our physical life by a ceremony.
The ceremony is different than a wedding. An elder actual connects to the spirit world and asks permission to bond the two in this life. if the bond is rejected by the spirit world. We do not stay with whoever we thought was right for us. We leave completely. Many of times leaving the continent to distances ourselves from whatever bond we thought we had from that person.
Its also very humiliating for each party. We are very prideful people. And if the ceremony is rejected the whole family is humiliated in the community. Everyone finds out sooner or later.
But if they are bonded we mate for life with that person. Its very special. The connection is truly different. Even the fairy community finds our loyalty and commitment to one individual amazing.
"Then we shall tell her about your best friend." I smile. "and then can I do that threatening thing I see on Tv?" I chuckle.
Mellissa smiles widely. "You can even do it the traditional way." I grin back. We fight and talk. Its really fun sometimes.
"So call her. Get her to meet us at the football stadium. It's really nice at night." I say going back to my salad.
Mellissa pulls out her phone and sends a text. it was literally like a second and a reply came in.
"Alright she said she would be there in five."
"but my foooodddd." I whine. Mellissa rolls her eyes and grabs my hand pulling me up.
"Let's go." She said pulling me out the door.
The football field was a 3 minutes' walk from the diner. We hoped the fence into the stadium and I quickly ran over to the goal post and shimmed up the pole and sat on the fork shaped area.
"Ashley, your are a child sometimes." Mellissa said looking up at me.
I snort jumping off the goal post and landing on top of her. Mellissa makes an off sound as her body hits the ground.
"A child who can kick your ass." I joke putting her hands above her head. "Don't mess with the fierce phoenix!" I say sarcastically. I love playing with Mellissa, she's my best friend, I know I can be happy with her and not have to worry about anything.
"Oh jeh? I'm pretty sure a leopard can eat a bird." She laughed pushing me over and pinning me down. She snapped in my face playfully.
"You have to catch me first!" I say throwing her off of me as I quickly get up and sprint down the field.
"Your so dead!" Mellissa yelled sprinting after me. I look behind me and Mellissa is so cheating. She is totally using her leopard abilities. She comes in arms distance of me and quickly throws herself on my back. We both tumble and roll a few feet before I start laughing.
"Nice one, Mell." Leigh Ann says sitting down next to her girlfriend. "that was a sweet tackle. I think you have a career in rugby." She chuckled as Mellissa sat up and blushed. It was cute to see her get so nervous.
"Hey Leigh Ann." I said smiling widely.
"Hey Ashley… you seem to be doing better." She said eyeing me for a moment. I smiled sheepishly and looked away. "So why am I here?" she said pulling Mellissa close to her and kissing her on the cheek.
"Well… I have been keeping a secret from you." Mellissa said.
"Oh." Leigh Ann seemed shocked.
"It's nothing bad…" I interject. "It's actually my deal. She just knows how I feel about people knowing." I say trying to calm her worried demeanor. "But…. Since I think I can trust you and I do believe you are going to be around for a long time." I smirk as both of them blush. "I think I'm safe for you to know."
I nod at Mellissa.
"Ashley is The Phoenix." Mellissa said calmly. Leigh Ann sucked in some air.
"No fucking way." She said blinking. She threw up her hands. "Makes all the sense in the world. Why you didn't smell like a freaking leopard." She opened her mouth slightly and stared out me. "This is going to seem out of line. But like I heard you were trying to find a human mate!" she takes a breath.
"Yah. I am." I said calmly.
She claps her hands together. "But why? The spirits haven't accepted a human and were marriage in forever."
"I have my reason." I mumble looking away. I heard Mellissa whispering something in Leigh Ann's ear and I knew everything would be okay. Leigh Ann was very loyal Were.
It was the fifth day of spring semester and I was getting breakfast in the cafeteria like I always do. I had the newspaper unfolded to the war in Afghanistan. Many Weres and faeries were serving in what we call the royal force. The council thought it was a good idea to speed along the end of the human war so life can return to normal for were communities in Iraq and Afghan. Weres were getting hurt in cross fire and random bombs.
Spencer is in the room. I don't look up and I hear the chair across from me shift as she sits down. "Hey."
I look up slightly but return to my paper. "hey." Her hand slides infront of the article I was pretending to read.
"I want to talk." She said calmly.
I look up at her. "uhuh." I said softly. I don't know why I'm being mean but I feel like this is a game for her. Like she doesn't understand how she affects me.
"I…..I" she shook slightly. "I've been thinking…. A lot." I nodded for her to continue. "what happened that night was horrible, Ash. I was angry at you."
Another WTF moment. How could she be angry with me?
"What I had with Kristen." Her voice cracked slightly. "I thought I loved her. That I could be with her because I loved her."
Perfect.
"But everything came into prospective that night." She took a breath. "You don't even know a lot about me. but you protected me from the girl who I thought loved me too. And at that moment all I could think about was how you screwed up my relationship with her. How much I hated you for ruining my normal life."
I opened my mouth to say something but she puts her hand up.
"The last month away from everything. I realized something." Her eyes connect with mine. "I don't miss Kristen. I don't miss our arguments or her possessiveness. I don't miss her hugs or kisses. I don't miss her."
I think this is turning into the best conversation… ever.
"I missed our breakfasts of random talk. I missed seeing you trip over imaginary rocks." That was so one fucking time. "I miss you walking me to class and telling me that the sun is shining. Because I know that's your way to tell me to be happy for the rest of the day." She cracks a smile. "I miss hugging you and knowing that for the rest of the day I'm going to be waiting to see you walk up on the rugby field. Even if we are a bitch to each other then."
I smile softly.
"I want my best friend back."
Frowny face.
She saw my face falter and she quickly grabbed a hold of my hand and squeezed it softly. "Everything takes time." She says softly. "You were right that day when you told me I liked you. Because I do. And I know it has taken me along time to admit it. But I need you in my life Ashley."
Happy face.
I know what she wanted so it was okay with me right now.
"Best friends first." I whisper to her squeezing her hand back. "Everything else comes second." She smiled and looked down. "We have all the time in the world, Spence."
She sighed in relief and I pulled her up out of the chair. "Common… you are going to be late for class." I softly tug her out of the cafeteria and we walk towards her building, never letting go of each others hand.
I'm pretty sure the smile on my face hasn't gone away since that day and that was 4 weeks ago. It was the beginning of February and I haven't been happier.
Kristen hasn't shown up to practice and Spencer and I are happy being friends and having actual fun in public with our teammates. Everyone seems to be at ease with the situation that happened now. At first when we all went out to a club, the whole team was somehow guarding Spencer from everyone.
"Girls gather in." Bucky said. We all jogged over to her from our field positions. We have been practicing hard core of the Marti Gra tournament in three days. "has everyone made car pool arrangements?" we all nod. Bucky looks down at the list and scans the names and cars. "Ashley. Your name isn't on here."
"Well Uhmm." I say. "I'm going with Mellissa and we are going to stay an extra day." I said smoothly. I was actually excited about this. That extra day is going to be filled with us getting extremely fucked up and hopping were bars.
"Sounds good." Bucky nods looks back at the paper. Everyone is still staring at me like I did something wrong.
"What?" I whispered. But then I see it. Spencer looked upset. What did I do?
"So anyway. The first game is on Friday morning. We should get there an hour early. I need everyone to dress warm because its going to be cold. And I was serious about writing the hotel address on your bodies when you ladies go into town. It gets extremely crazy." Some chuckle and nod. "Well I will see you at the hotel!" Bucky said smiling.
We all walk over to the bleachers, but Spencer just walked off to the parking lot.
"What the fuck did I do?" I asked myself out loud.
"Well maybe the fact that you are hanging out with Mellissa." Carmen said and everyone nodded. Carmen ditched Kristen after she heard what happened. She said she didn't hang with abusive people. I had a sense there was more going on but no one pushed.
"What?" I said.
Oh. Shit. They think she's my girlfriend.
"No no no!" I shriek. "Mellissa is my best friend! She lives in Hattiesburg with her Girlfriend Leigh Ann."
Everyone looked shocked and relieved. "We were just going to go down there and have fun. The three of us." More like 33 of us. Ha.
"Leigh Ann from Rugby?" Katie asked. I nodded.
"They hit it off when they met."
"Shit well you better go explain that to Spencer." Cara said. "She's been through enough. She doesn't need a cheating… whatever you two are."
I snort. "Friends. We are friends."
Everyone laughs and snorts. "Yah fucking right." Katie says.
"Bye guys." I said running towards the parking lot. She was gone already. I quickly kicked off my cleats and ran towards her dorm. She moved back into one of the halls after Kristen and her broke up. Her roommate Rachel was cool. Easy to talk to.
I sprint up the stairs of the dorm to the fourth floor and throw open their door. Rachel jumps. "Ashley! Jesus!"
I smile at her. "Spencer here?"
"Yah. I think she's mad." Rachel quirked and eyebrow. "What did you do?"
I shook my head. "Nothing, I swear." I opened their bedroom door and quickly stepped in shutting the door behind me. Spencer was laying on her bed with a pillow over her head.
"Go away Ashley." She said through the pillow. I sigh and sat down next to her and pulled the pillow off her head.
"She's not my girlfriend." I stated sternly.
Spencer's eyes snapped to mine. "We aren't dating you can do whatever." She said.
I rolled my eyes. "Clearly." I said sarcastically smiling. "She's my best friend Spencer. She's dating Leigh Ann from southern miss…. They are living together."
"Oh." She said. "I… didn't. i….." she turned red. "I'm sorry."
I chuckled and leaned in to brush her hair out of her face. "No need to be."
"I was jealous." She stated.
"Duh." I smiled placing my hand on top of hers. "Spencer." I sighed. I didn't know what to say anymore. She needed time. And I respected that but.
I lean down and slowly kiss her on the cheek. I linger for a moment. She is totally not breathing as I pulled back.
Her eyes turned a dark blue and she just stared at me. "Ashley." She said barely above a whisper. "You cant do that."
I swear sometimes when she says stuff I feel like she kills me a little inside.
She sits up and cups my face. And leans in and kissing me on the lips.
It was short and I didn't kiss back. You know when people say that sometimes your whole body goes tingly and you cant think? Totally just happened.
Her face stays a few centimeters away from mine. "I've been waiting for you to do that forever Spencer." I mumbled as I leaned in and kissed her softly. I pulled back after a few second and looked into her eyes.
"You and me." she said. "I don't even know how to explain to people what we are." She leans in and gives me short kisses. "I say to everyone 'she's my best friend.'" She kisses me for a few seconds longer. "But all I want to say is that you are my girlfriend." My face turns red.
"You don't know how long I have been waiting for you to make the first move." I said pulling her into me. she straddles me and we start kissing passionately. Our lips move with each other's and it feels so right.
She moans softly into my mouth as my hands wander to her lower back. It was fucking amazing. She pulls away from me and leans her head against mine. We are both breathing heavily.
"This doesn't seem real." I said.
I cant believe I was able to do this. To fall in love with a human. Someone so amazing as her.
This story is fast pace! i know! but i think it flows nicely. gotta get to the climax and things. hehe
thanks for the review from all my awesome people
number15: Lets hope to god they dont find out. 'Spencer' would completely shoot me.
Ethiogirl: ha. they are together now. :D or.
Lalalalee: caught me. Alabama. Went to New Orleans for concerts and a tourney. its a pretty wicked place minus getting pickpocketed and punching two guys in the face. lol.
Day-dreamer2012: I think i saw that movie a while back. but wasnt it all about Were-wolfs? dont really remember. but no ha.
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THANKS again. if we knew each other in person you would get one of my sketchy random hugs.