/Alternative title for this chapter: The chapter in which I discover that has no strikeout feature on their text editor. XDD\\

*The letter has been written in a hurry, and the author has obviously changed their mind about what they are writing. some parts have been scratched out so hard they are almost entirely redacted but are still readable.

[This has been long overdue, and still I'm not sure what to write. It still doesn't all make sense to me, but I will do my best. I'm not sure all of what you actually know or remember, because you are very good at not telling anybody everything, but I also never really asked.]

[Hey sans, I want to apologise]

[I'm sorry]

There's too many things I want to write here so I will stay to facts for you. [By what you always tell us in the judgement hall, you know the science side of things which I don't even know myself. Flowey's also told me before that you caused him plenty of trouble too, so you've been going long enough that even if I did understand it and I wanted to, I couldn't tell you what you don't already know on that side of things.]

My name is Frisk, I am the human who is falling into the underground. I came to the underground by accident [for not so good reasons]. I didn't know that there was a place here, all I knew was that people who climbed Mt. Ebbot didn't come back, and that was okay.
*by the way the paper is dimpled, you can tell they paused for a bit here before deciding how to continue with their story, tapping the paper.
 I woke up on the golden flower bed under the opening, and was greeted by a yellow flower who spoke with me. He offered to show me how the underground worked, then nearly killed me. He would have if, Toriel hadn't saved me. She [led] [lead] led me through the ruins, showed me that although monsters might look scary they were pretty much harmless. So, long story short, I came through the underground. I made friends with and I learned from all of you. But I got scared of the future. I got scared of going back down the mountain by myself. The next thing I knew I was falling again.
That was when I found out I could go back.
This time I took my time and spent more time with everyone. It was strange, to go through with my friends without them knowing me, but I already knew what I had to do... mostly. I noticed some things were different. The biggest change was Asriel, and managing to turn him back from being a flower. After he broke the barrier for everyone, we moved on but I couldn't help but think about him. So I went back, but by the time I returned, the residual from the souls had faded and he was back to Flowey. I made my way back to where the barrier was and reset. I was falling again. I made my way through dozens of times trying to find a way to save him as well, but whatever I tried, I couldn't think of anything to keep him with a soul. So I reset again and again, trying everything. I asked Alphys a couple of times but she couldn't come up with anything concrete, and none of our attempts worked. I asked you as well but [I don't think] nothing worked.

Through all of my travels, I had another person helping me. They told me things that I needed to know about monsters when I was making my way through so I would know how to avoid fighting them, or so I would know how much they could hurt me or how much I could hurt them. we spoke about things, too, somethimes. Their name was Chara. Asriel told me they weren't the best person. [I should have known] I didn't know what they meant at the time by that, because although they were attached to me, I never knew what they were thinking and I don't think they knew what I was thinking... It was a bit like having a [ghost] seperate person tied around your waist, but not.

Then one day, I got bored. I got curious. I wanted to see what would change if I took a different path to the end. I took my frustrations out on a froggit in the ruins, but felt awful so I threw away the toy knife I attacked him with and went back to trying to make friends with everyone. Things were... The same but not. Undyne wouldn't hang out with me in the same way. It was... strange. Then there was when you met me in the judgement hall, and somehow, you knew what I had done. You actually asked me if I did it just to see what you would say about it. I wondered what else would change. So I went back to the beginning, and tried again. Curiosity got the better of me again, and I knew I could fix it.
Things changed one reset.
Up that point I didn't have it in me to hurt any of my friends. I know that doesn't make it better and I'm not using that as an excuse. I never should have hurt anyone in the first place.

It changed because Toriel was blocking the door and I was doing my best to avoid her spells and not hurt her, but when she stopped attacking... I cut across her and she dusted. [she looked so betrayed] But it wasn't me. Chara shrugged it off and told me that they were just doing it because I never had the guts to follow through, but there had been something about them that with every reset that had been... changing. I decided to not kill anyone else and reset, but it was too late. I got stuck in a cycle of Chara killing until I could gain enough ground to spare those I was fighting against, just trying to make it through so I could reset so I could set things right, and it just kept getting worse, never better. I had to save everyone somehow, but I had no idea how. More people died. Then I got through one without killing anyone, but it wasn't me that wanted to reset. It became hard. I would reset them, they would reset me.

I never found a way to save asriel.
I need a way to save myself as well now.

It was never meant to end this way.

[Help me. Please.]

I don't deserve your help by now, but I want to get us all up top. I know you've given up on that but if I can get us to the top again, I am not going to try and save Asriel again beyond what I already know I can do, I just want the cycle of death to break.

And once we're free, if you think I am going to hurt anyone, don't let me. Don't let THEM.

Please.

/Just a little one, it felt out of place outting frisk's message into the other chapters.\\