Without Destiny

Chapter 4

Leah POV

Before I knew that the stories my father told me as a child we're real, I loved Sam. I loved him since our first kiss when I was fifteen. I loved him when he chose Emily over me. And I loved him even as I was in his head and saw how much he loved her.

There was never anyone else that I noticed or felt things for; I thought he was the one until the day he broke up with me.

To me, imprinting ruined my life. I hated it for taking my boyfriend, and then the wolf goes on and makes me experience his thoughts and his feelings, what he was supposed to feel for me, for my cousin.

But then I imprinted.

In the stupid forest in the stupid rain on a stupid girl who expects me to believe that she was just hiking out there. And I felt stupid things the moment I met her eyes; I felt my gravity jolt out from under my feet like a rug was yanked.

And those stupid feeling and that stupid pull made me care about this stupid stranger, this girl, who stepped in a fucking bear trap of all things- and was crying and dirty and had blood puddling underneath her even as she glared at me.

And god, I never felt anything towards anyone except Sam, but she is gorgeous and stubborn and my imprint- and I don't want to care but I can't help it. I can't help the instant panic I felt when I realized that my imprint was hurt and crying and dirty and had blood puddling underneath her even as she glared at me.

I didn't know her, she was a stupid girl who stepped in a fucking bear trap, but she was mine- I knew that much.

And she is so...frustrating. She is not what I imagined my imprint to be at all.

I still think that imprinting is ruining my life. I really think the fates are screwing with me or spitting on me or something because this girl who is supposed to be the love of my life doesn't even like me.

And she's so fucking mysterious.

"So, where exactly am I? What state is this?"

Like what the fucking hell?!

I stare over my dinner at Mack, who is busy separating all her food (so they are not touching), bewildered.

"Washington. On a reservation just outside of a town called Forks." Her eyebrows rise in surprise. "Why, where are you from?"

She shrugs. "Just around."

So. Fucking. Mysterious. And not even the intriguing kind, but the exasperated 'she won't tell me anything!' kind. Okay, maybe I'm a little interested but it's more maddening than anything else.

I get that she's running away from something, but why? Is it just a fit of teenage rebellion or is something really wrong?

She finally starts to eat after all her food is in individual piles, just like she did the other night and for breakfast. I wonder if it's an OCD thing? She probably wouldn't tell me that much either.

"So, what are you running from?" I blurt. "Police? Mafia? Ex-boyfriend...? Ex-girlfriend?"

"Who says I'm running away from anything?" She rolls her eyes.

"The fact that I found you in the woods with a bear trap around your ankle, and that you don't even know what state you're in."

She scowls at the reminder of how we met. She scowls at me a lot. Then her expression drops into something that makes my stupid feelings once again feel something for her in my chest.

"Let's just say that I have a complicated family," she sighs dejected.

I swallow at the unease that suddenly finds itself worming around in my gut.

"You mentioned your dad yesterday...?"

She sneers at her food before lifting her head and directing it at me.

"What is this- twenty questions? We're going to get deep and personal now, share our life woes? You're nice and everything for letting me stay a few days, so I say this in the nicest way possible: fuck off."

My fists clench. Because imprinting didn't screw me over enough, they gave me the broken connection with the most distrusting and defensive girl ever.

God I wish I had imprinted on anyone else. I immediately feel guilt at the thought, aggregating me even more.

"You know, you're kind of a bitch," I comment, struggling to keep my calm. One thing she's going to be good for is teaching me patience in not losing my temper so easily.

"Yup," she sighs, pushing her plate away and clearly signifying that she is finished eating.

"Are you going to finish that?" Seth breaks in, staring hopefully at the remains of Mack's dinner. He's been staying quiet so far, but with the prospect of extra food he just can't seem to help himself.

She smiles slightly at him, and frustration courses to the veins in my temple, throbbing in an ache there. Why won't she smile at me.

My eyes narrow in jealousy.

"Go ahead, Seth," she tells him kindly.

My brother eagerly pulls the plate towards him to devour the scraps, unmindful of the carefully formed sections of food.

"I'm kind of tired. May I be excused?" She asks me, and I'm surprised she even inquired. Everything about her so far has told me that she just does what she wants.

"Yeah," I sigh. "Let me get you some clothes so you can shower."

"Thanks," she says quietly, almost like she's embarrassed, and I realize something. Maybe it's not that she is ungrateful, but that she is ashamed for needing help to begin with. Since I first knelt next to her to open the bear trap, she has been insisting she can do everything herself, and then gets furious at me when she can't (and I have to help her).

This new hypothesis is disturbing in that nothing ever good could have happened as a reason someone is like that.

"Whatever," I mumble, shoving the items into her arms at the bathroom door, suddenly needing to get away and go for a run. Or talk to someone.

I make my way out the back door of the house and start stripping.

A/N: So, it's a short chapter but it gives some insight into Leah's perspective. I know I'm making Mack kind of mean but she's not very good with emotions and coping. Her thing is kind of lashing out which is what got her into this mess.

Anyway, please review; let me know what you think.

~Silver~