Author's Note: I'm shit. You know it, I know it, here's the long overdue update. I honestly kept forgetting to post it! -_-;;

Ed gritted his teeth. "You don't know who put this there?"

Winry shook her head, and said, "But I don't think it's anyone to worry about, Ed."

Who would possibly jerk and string Ed around like this for some stupid game?

"Mustang," Ed growled. "It's Roy Mustang, isn't it?"

"…you think everything that's wrong with the world is caused by Roy Mustang," Winry sighed. "He's not that bad, you know. Just kind of a pig-faced jerk."

She had a bit of a point. If it was Mustang's evil scheme, Ed would have to wear a miniskirt. But, then again, what kind of evil scheme was forcing him to see Winry? There was no doubt in Ed's mind the orchestrator of this scheme was some sick bastard out to get him by wasting his time. The only person who thought that was a bad thing would have to be…

"MIDGET, YOU'RE TOO GAY TO TALK TO A WOMAN FOR THIS LONG!"

…Envy.

Winry dashed to the window, pulled it open and shouted, "Shut up, you're insane!"

Envy. It made sense. Envy would create some stupid hack scheme to mess with Ed, just for his own amusement, and he definitely considered anything to do with Winry a punishment. It would be just like Envy to stick close to the scene of the crime to throw off any thoughts of guilt, too, and everyone knew Envy had a sick fixation with tormenting Ed. It wasn't as bad as Mustang's, but it was still there, and Envy only stopped treating Ed like shit after Mum —

"Gotta go, Win," Ed said, dashing to the door before she could reply. He heard her shouting something, probably about calling later, but the words didn't register properly in his mind.

"Come to your senses, I see," Envy noted, once again pretending to be smooth and suave.

Ed met Envy's eyes, scanned the smirk on his lip, and wondered how he'd ever been so damn blind. Of course it was Envy. This was so intricate and stupid and damn pointless that there was no way it could be anyone else.

Well. Ed would play along. He'd go along with this, go back to the library, and when Envy tried to do his dramatic reveal, Ed would punch him in the face.

Perfect.

"Back to the school," Ed replied, climbing onto the back of the motorbike.

"No resistance?" Envy observed, climbing on too. "Brilliant. I like you way better this way, Edo."

"Just drive!"

Once again, Envy drove with care, and suddenly Ed realised, it was how Envy drove when his little brother was on the back after missing the bus. It was how Envy drove when he'd bought a vegetarian pizza with satay sauce, at least after that time he'd forgotten to secure the luggage bay properly and it'd ended up on the road. It was, simply put, how Envy drove when he thought whatever he was carrying was wonderful enough to bother taking care of.

Before he registered what he was doing, Ed was wrapping his arms tighter around Envy's torso and buried his face in Envy's back. Maybe after he punched Envy, he'd wait and see what the explanation for all this bullshit was. After all, Envy hadn't ever given up on him, no matter how many times Ed told him to fuck the hell off. Envy always came back.

They arrived at the school half an hour later, as the sun was starting to go down. The sky looks like it was on fire — streaks of orange, fiery pink, and the odd blue still hanging on. The whispy clouds seemed to swirl around the sun, not that Ed was stupid enough to look directly at the glowing orange orb.

"So, the roof, right?" Envy confirmed, staring up the building.

"Yeah," Ed replied.

"Sure you can handle the climb, shrimp?"

Ed punched Envy in the stomach. "Fuck up, I've climbed up there all the damn time with Al."

"No… need… to get… violent," Envy wheezed.

It made Ed feel very smug, when Envy struggled to get to the top. Regardless, he leant down and pulled Envy over the top and onto the roof. It was flat, concrete, the same as it had been every time Ed'd followed Al up before Mum got so sick she couldn't leave the hospital. It seemed mindboggling that everything could be completely different, but still look the same.

"Alright," Envy panted. "We're on the roof. Fuck. What damn time is it?"

"Ten to."

Even though he'd asked, Envy pulled out his phone to confirm. Ed scowled. Asshole didn't trust him, huh? Ed wasn't the one who'd led him on a ridiculous wild goose chase for his own sick pleasure.

Envy flopped down on the roof, staring up at the sky. "'S pretty up here."

"Yep," Ed growled, keeping one eye on his watch. So Envy was going to monologue for ten minutes, then bring out the oh-my-god-so-effing-shocking twist? Like one of those fucking stupid soap operas Envy loved, and had gotten Al into, so Ed couldn't ever escape them.

Envy glanced over to Ed, sighed, and pulled him down. Ed yelped, ended up sprawled half in Envy's lap, glaring up into that stupid pale face, framed by those stupid green dreadlocks, and those stupid purple eyes…

"You're prettier," Envy said, quite matter-of-factly.

And then he kissed Ed.

Ed knew he should've punched Envy, yelled at Envy, told him never to waste his damn time again, but Ed found himself kissing back and thinking, maybe it hadn't been a total waste. And maybe life wasn't all completely awful now Mum was gone.

When Envy checked his phone again, it was five past six. "Damn," he remarked, eyebrows (also green, somehow) raised. "He's late."

Ed sat up straighter. "Yeah, don't pretend."

"Come again, Edo?"

Ed met Envy's eyes with a glare. "How'd you know to come up to the roof at six? I never showed you the note."

Twirling a dreadlock, Envy grinned sheepishly, and shrugged. "Magic?"

"Envy."

"Fine, I was in on it," Envy muttered, scowling slightly. "But it wasn't my idea, dammit."

"Then, whose was it?"

Again, Envy shrugged. This time, he seemed sincere. "No clue. I just hid all the notes, and drove you around."

Ed frowned. "You really…?"

"Nah, just found a letter in my locker. Thought you'd sent me a love note, it said, 'To Help Ed' on the front, and —"

The sound of feet landing on the foot came. Ed jumped to his feet and whirled to face his enemy, fists curled ready to fight. Immediately, he let them drop, and gasped, "Al?"

Al flashed an apologetic grin. "Sorry I'm late, brother! There was a kitten, and —"

"You did this?"

"Yeah," Al replied. "I knew you'd be too distracted by Envy to figure it out. That's why I got him."

Envy preened. "I am quite gorgeous, aren't I?"

"You… you…" Ed spluttered. He pointed accusingly. "You traitor! What the hell, Al? Why would you… what… what even is this?"

"I was worried about you, brother," Al replied. He made no move to approach, he knew Ed too well for that. Knew Ed well enough to predict his every movement, down to how long it'd take, and knew perfectly well how to manipulate it. "You shut yourself off from everybody, and I wanted you to remember, you're not alone, Ed."

"How can I be alone with… with…" He pointed at Envy. "With that stalking me everywhere?"

"…hey!" Envy protested.

"Think about it, Ed," Al sighed. "Wasn't it good to see Winry again? To think Mustang's out to get you for no reason? To come up here just because we can?"

It was. It was all good. But dammit, Ed was pissed off.

"— to overreact and get pissed off at even good thing?"

And Al knew him too damn well.

"Fuck you, Al," Ed conceded, crossing his arms and huffing in irritation.

Al smiled, and pulled his brother — only shorter for the time being, Ed thought — into an embrace. "It's good to have you back, brother."

"…yeah," Ed muttered.

Al knew Ed well enough to know that was a 'thank you'.

"Let's go home," Al said as he pulled away. "I figured out how to make Mum's stew, it's really good!"

"Yeah," Ed said, again. "Sure." He glanced back to Envy. "Ya coming?"

Envy jumped up, and smiled. "Always."

As they walked home, having decided to just leave Envy's bike until tomorrow, and took the long way just because, Ed thought this was treasure enough.

So that's the end. No more worries about putting up with my awful updating skills! (Seriously, next time, get on my case about it.)

I hope you enjoyed it.