Caroline's Mix Tape – Track 3 – I Hope You Had The Time Of Your Life by Green Day
The minute I got to school, I was met with a pray circle. "Dear God, please give Clyde Donovan the strength to overco-." They stopped and turned to look at me as they heard my thundering footsteps. Their silence was deafening. I could feel their stares of sorrow and pity on the back of my head. "Craig?"
I turned to see Phoebe. 'Phoebe?' I wanted to ask but no words made it out of my throat. 'I haven't seen her in forever.' Her overly curly hair was pulled into a ponytail. "Kenny is looking for you." She whispered and ran off with me following her. Her and Kenny never left each others side anymore. Not after Eva. I quickly shook the thoughts of Eva out of my head. But once those thoughts subsided. The thoughts of Clyde hit me like a boulder. His pale face against the blue hospital pillow sheet. The deep jagged cuts on his frail wrists. His neatly brushed and parted hair. His mom probably did that when she went to go see him.
"Clyde." I whispered as I felt someone grab my wrist. "Craig dude?" I looked up from my combat boots to look at Kenny. "Where are we?" Kenny ran his fingers though his dirty blonde hair. "The old band room." Looking around at the old room I smiled. The concrete walls with old posters, drawings, and pictures. "I haven't been in here since freshman year." I say as I make my way to the walls. Tracing the creases between the concrete bricks. I slowly make my way up the carpeted concrete bleachers. I come to the back corner, where our small group has sat back in freshman year for study hall; the cluster of pictures they had taken, notes they had passed, concert tickets, movie tickets, and dead sharpies that were taped to the wall was a little frightening.
"My name is Kenny McCormick and I'm the biggest idiot ever." "Wow thanks Eva, your so nice to your boyfriend." " *you're." "TACO BELL ROCKS." "Thanks for that information Clyde." "No problem Lizzie." I traced Clyde's sloppy handwriting as I knelled in front of the scribbled words. The amount of conversations that littered the bare wall around the photos, notes, and tickets made me feel so nostalgic for the past. I just want to go back to being so excited for Eva and Kenny getting their permits together. Then maybe they could drive us to Asses of Fire 3.
I wanted to go back to the first day of study hall. Were me, Clyde, Kenny, Tweek, and Token were so scared of the upperclassmen that we ran into the first room we saw; which just happened to be the band room, where me met Eva, Lizzie, Alex, Destiny, Kristina, and Jacob. From that day on, us 11 became inseparable.
Until everything went to hell. Eva and Kenny got into a car crash, Eva hardly making it out alive; Kenny hardly ever talking after that day. Lizzie getting shot, Jacob getting his by that car, Alex and Destiny in the house fire, and Tina's mental break down. Now Clyde. We were never suppose to end like this. Weren't suppose to be picked off one by one.
"Craig." Kenny was calling out to me. But I couldn't stop looking at the picture of Eva and Kenny. Their smiling faces as they sat together in this very room. Kenny playing their song as they both sang along. "Craig!" I felt like I just woke up. The tears that were streaming down my face were all to noticeable.
"Why did this have to happen to us? Why not someone else? It's not fair, we're just kids. We aren't suppose to be dieing, or falling into coma's, or trying to kill ourselves. They should all still be awake right now. The SHIT that happened to them shouldn't have happened. That fucking asshole that shot Lizzie shouldn't still be out there. He should be in jail. The guy that hit Jacob shouldn't be out there. He should be in fucking jail too. WHY US? WHY NOT SOMEONE ELSE. WHY DOES EVERYONE I CARE ABOUT LEAVE OR DIE. I JUST WANT FRESHMAN YEAR BACK GOD DAMMIT!"
I can hear my self screaming, but my mouth just keeps moving. "I just want freshman year back." I say, my voice hoarse and hardly above a whisper. Kenny just stood there, tears streaming down his reddened cheeks. "I just want freshman year back." He sobs. "I want to go back. I want to stop her from getting in the car. I want to save her." Phoebe sat beside him. Her face in her hands as she tears poured from her blue eyes. I watched them quietly. I just wanted to go back. I just wanted to save them.
"I'm gonna go see them." I state as I stand up and rush out of the school Kenny hot on my heels. Phoebe never left early from school anymore like she use to. The drive to the hospital was silent and seemed to be over in seconds. Kenny sprinted past me. "Eva."
He whispered as he got to her room. I peaked in to see him sitting beside her bed. The acoustic guitar he had left in her room all those months ago was finally being played again.
"Been up all night
Staring at you
Wondering what's on your mind
I've been this way
With so many before
But this feels like the first time
You want the sunrise
To go back to bed
I want to make you laugh
Mess up my bed with me
Kick off the covers
I'm waiting
Every word you say I think
I should write down
I don't want to forget
Come daylight
Happy to lay here
Just happy to be here
I'm happy to know you
Play me a song
Your newest one
Please leave your taste on my tongue
Paperweight on my back
Cover me like a blanket
Mess up my bed with me
Kick off the covers
I'm waiting
Every word you say I think
I should write down
I don't to forget
Come daylight
And no need to worry
That's wastin time
And no need to wonder
What's been on my mind
It's you
It's you
Every word you say I think
I should write down
Don't want to forget
Come daylight
And I give up
I let you win
You win 'cause I'm not counting
You made it back
To sleep again
Wonder what you're dreaming."
He sang to her. "Oh god Eva. I'm so sorry." He whispered. I walked away and into Clyde's room. His face paler then before. I laid my head next to his. The batman headphones already on, I pressed play on the Walkman. Singing quietly to him.
"Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time
It's something unpredictable, but in the end is right,
I hope you had the time of your life.
So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos and memories and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth it was worth all the while
It's something unpredictable, but in the end is right,
I hope you had the time of your life.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end is right,
I hope you had the time of your life.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end is right,
I hope you had the time of your life."
My singing voice was hoarse and choked with sobs. "Clyde. Clyde please wake up."
"I need you."
"I need you too Craig."